WEBVTT 00:03.363 --> 00:05.525 [SPEAKER_01]: That's a gay app name for a gay app podcast. 00:06.286 --> 00:13.774 [SPEAKER_00]: Nick Locklin is a gosh-darn New York City icon with a crazy musical theater herstery. 00:13.814 --> 00:16.176 [SPEAKER_00]: We have so much to dive into Nick Lock. 00:16.877 --> 00:18.659 [SPEAKER_00]: Nick Locklin, thank you for coming on. 00:18.679 --> 00:20.280 [SPEAKER_00]: That's a gay ass podcast. 00:21.411 --> 00:22.493 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm so happy to be here. 00:22.513 --> 00:23.514 [SPEAKER_01]: It's so fun. 00:24.014 --> 00:30.962 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, I can't wait to dive in because there's a lot of tea and behind the scenes that we need to discuss. 00:31.022 --> 00:37.170 [SPEAKER_00]: But, Numerous Uno, you just went to Madonna in Times Square with every other gay person in New York City. 00:37.290 --> 00:38.031 [SPEAKER_00]: How was? 00:38.611 --> 00:39.492 [SPEAKER_01]: So cool. 00:39.652 --> 00:42.234 [SPEAKER_01]: Oh my god, they were being very mysterious about it. 00:42.314 --> 00:54.603 [SPEAKER_01]: I got like the invite the day before they weren't telling us anything It was all very, you know, tight-lipped and then I was like joining a suit whatever then then like know you are going to be walking to Times Square with a group of people watching Madonna 00:55.363 --> 00:56.023 [SPEAKER_00]: It was so cool. 00:56.524 --> 00:57.925 [SPEAKER_01]: We were like, I love it with her too. 00:58.065 --> 01:04.228 [SPEAKER_01]: It was my first time seeing her live, so I can't compare much to her, but I was very impressed and I think the gaze are going to freak out. 01:04.789 --> 01:05.689 [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, by the video. 01:06.289 --> 01:10.512 [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, wait, did she show a video that they shoot something? 01:10.552 --> 01:14.834 [SPEAKER_01]: What's the, I was very interested in their like pro shot. 01:16.315 --> 01:19.457 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, the drone thing the way it came in right as it opened. 01:19.477 --> 01:35.447 [SPEAKER_01]: I was like, okay, this I hope they're gonna put this up somewhere to fully watch it And by the way, if any gay guy music video night video, I feel like that's very much what it's gonna be like the full few minutes You to me seem to be somebody who would curate a really good gay guy music video night 01:35.687 --> 01:37.008 [SPEAKER_00]: I'll be honest with you. 01:37.128 --> 01:47.697 [SPEAKER_00]: I haven't partaken in as many of them as I would like to, especially as like a professional gay guy, but I don't know Nick, you've got your finger on the throbbing pulse. 01:48.417 --> 01:57.184 [SPEAKER_00]: Um, by the way, if anybody listening doesn't know Madonna did a thing with Grindr in Times Square, and I mean, what was it for her new album? 01:57.204 --> 01:57.905 [SPEAKER_00]: Is this all promo? 01:58.418 --> 01:59.319 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it was pride. 01:59.479 --> 02:05.104 [SPEAKER_01]: And well, I don't, did you check your grinder and see that Madonna was all of a sudden saved as you're like main grid? 02:05.565 --> 02:09.208 [SPEAKER_00]: Not to bragnick, but I have not, I've deleted all of my apps. 02:09.248 --> 02:10.810 [SPEAKER_00]: I haven't been on in about a month. 02:11.130 --> 02:12.071 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh my god. 02:12.131 --> 02:13.312 [SPEAKER_01]: Well, maybe we'll leave the girls. 02:13.632 --> 02:14.754 [SPEAKER_01]: Wow congrats. 02:14.774 --> 02:16.175 [SPEAKER_01]: Thank you so much. 02:16.676 --> 02:24.706 [SPEAKER_01]: They've made it so that she is like on your grid and they changed the whole grinder app to pink And it was like, do you want Madonna on your thing? 02:24.726 --> 02:28.331 [SPEAKER_01]: And I literally said no because I was like, is this an ad like what is this listen? 02:28.671 --> 02:50.441 [SPEAKER_00]: people justifiably shit on grinder because of how much money they're now making because they've made the app useless unusable I mean because of the ads but if at least they're gonna platform Madonna yeah I think that is some there's some goodwill there even though I have barely used the avenues because of I guess it should be careful in case I work with them whatever 02:59.141 --> 03:04.665 [SPEAKER_00]: I just want to keep it honest next to me and cut to Grindr serving papers. 03:05.645 --> 03:18.714 [SPEAKER_00]: So listen, for the people who are not familiar with Nick Locklin's work, you have a performance history, you have directed some of our biggest gay icons, you have written on 03:27.359 --> 03:38.224 [SPEAKER_00]: But I find to be something somewhat controversial, is he went to CCM since the Nadi conservative Twar or what's the M musical theater arts or musical theater? 03:38.765 --> 03:41.206 [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and you survived CCM, is that correct? 03:41.786 --> 03:42.126 [SPEAKER_00]: I did. 03:42.146 --> 03:44.448 [SPEAKER_01]: It was totally, 03:45.288 --> 04:00.365 [SPEAKER_01]: There, it was, it's, uh, people of, including Mike Wayne, Marlemendelle, um, she said on Lost Cultresses that CCM is the, uh, Harvard of musical theater, which is like, and I would say that, like, there's lots of good, great, amazing schools. 04:00.646 --> 04:05.732 [SPEAKER_01]: CCM is also just one of the oldest, so it's like an, an old institution that's very competitive, very intense. 04:06.352 --> 04:16.319 [SPEAKER_01]: It's one of the make Michigan then if CCM is Harvard, Michigan is what I think Michigan's Yale and CMU is Brown Sure, and then there was one other one. 04:16.339 --> 04:18.000 [SPEAKER_01]: I like why you was something else. 04:18.200 --> 04:23.504 [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I went to NYU But I didn't go from musical theater as much as I tried they put me into an act. 04:23.764 --> 04:25.806 [SPEAKER_00]: Thank God they put you exactly in your 04:27.967 --> 04:32.510 [SPEAKER_01]: Well, and let's say as an 18-year-old gay, I'm so glad I was in Ohio and not New York. 04:32.750 --> 04:33.211 [SPEAKER_01]: Oh my god. 04:33.231 --> 04:36.433 [SPEAKER_01]: I don't know why I've got a school college in New York City? 04:37.313 --> 04:37.593 [SPEAKER_01]: No. 04:37.954 --> 04:39.314 [SPEAKER_01]: Well, I did not figure out how I either. 04:39.675 --> 04:46.479 [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, you're like, and why you is not college and why you was just like dumping an 18-year-old onto the streets and say no good luck. 04:46.539 --> 04:50.041 [SPEAKER_00]: And I I'm happy I went because I didn't need or want a 04:51.082 --> 04:52.583 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm actually realizing this in this moment. 04:52.663 --> 05:00.126 [SPEAKER_00]: I think I didn't want a classic college experience because I would have compared it to my high school experience, which was like so straight. 05:00.246 --> 05:06.129 [SPEAKER_00]: Obviously, you went to a conservatory from musical theater, so you were probably in that gay bubble. 05:06.149 --> 05:09.851 [SPEAKER_00]: But I just never, no part of me was like looking forward to a tailgate. 05:10.231 --> 05:14.713 [SPEAKER_00]: And so I don't think I am sad that I missed out on the college experience. 05:14.893 --> 05:17.254 [SPEAKER_00]: But wait, you can meet, what is NYU? 05:17.314 --> 05:18.995 [SPEAKER_00]: If it's not, if it's not, 05:19.625 --> 05:20.326 [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, yeah. 05:20.626 --> 05:24.190 [SPEAKER_01]: I was honestly like NYU would be, um, is it just NYU? 05:24.550 --> 05:25.611 [SPEAKER_01]: I think it's like just NYU. 05:25.712 --> 05:30.637 [SPEAKER_01]: There's brown, Yale, Harvard, what's the other one that I'd be looking at in terms of IVs? 05:30.817 --> 05:31.618 [SPEAKER_00]: Um, yeah. 05:31.718 --> 05:32.098 [SPEAKER_00]: Stanford? 05:32.138 --> 05:32.679 [SPEAKER_00]: Is that an IV? 05:32.819 --> 05:33.760 [SPEAKER_01]: Maybe, yeah, let's do that. 05:34.401 --> 05:35.842 [SPEAKER_00]: Which I would say in what you just NYU. 05:36.523 --> 05:39.145 [SPEAKER_00]: I think it is also Stanford is way too hard to get into. 05:39.225 --> 05:41.987 [SPEAKER_00]: I never would have gone in if I had a play. 05:42.127 --> 05:46.930 [SPEAKER_00]: But CCM, some people might not know that they have a cut program or they used to have a cut program. 05:46.950 --> 05:49.532 [SPEAKER_01]: So we were the very first year that they didn't have cuts. 05:49.812 --> 05:53.095 [SPEAKER_01]: So when I visited as an incoming senior, 05:54.316 --> 05:58.260 [SPEAKER_01]: There were people that were fully cut still in class and I was like heartbroken for them. 05:58.300 --> 05:59.481 [SPEAKER_01]: I was this is horrible. 05:59.761 --> 06:00.662 [SPEAKER_01]: We had a lot of work. 06:00.903 --> 06:02.204 [SPEAKER_01]: They got cut with they were still. 06:02.645 --> 06:03.706 [SPEAKER_01]: So you have to finish out the year. 06:03.746 --> 06:07.210 [SPEAKER_01]: You find out you cut and then you have like three weeks of class left. 06:07.450 --> 06:08.611 [SPEAKER_01]: Like whoa. 06:09.252 --> 06:11.875 [SPEAKER_00]: That's like getting dumped and then you're still living with your partner. 06:12.390 --> 06:16.551 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I'm like, I don't know why I don't know, I'm glad they changed it. 06:16.711 --> 06:19.492 [SPEAKER_01]: It doesn't make sense to also it's musical theater school. 06:19.512 --> 06:30.915 [SPEAKER_01]: Why are you doing all this work to get into the school and then you're like, unless you're like actively like missing class and like doing drugs and being bad or whatever, then maybe, but if you're just being cut because it didn't like your vibe, 06:32.155 --> 06:43.384 [SPEAKER_01]: So they announced to the whole program it was like all four classes with like it's like 16 to 18 per class That we'd be the first class that I'd have cuts in this all the upper class. 06:43.424 --> 06:54.954 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm like, Oh, give me a break And we have targets on our backs the minute we got there We were like the like sweet little you know the like the new way of OCCM the participation trophy kids 06:55.414 --> 07:12.884 [SPEAKER_01]: I do feel like there was old school CCM was very competitive, very like ruthless, whatever cause there were cuts and we did have some of the energy from the upper class and that we I think flushed out and I would say the people below us, we were like choosing kindness and like being, you know, sort of how like 07:13.964 --> 07:21.730 [SPEAKER_01]: Lady Gaga has chosen it in Brace to New Pop Girls where the women above had to go on to share, went on television, called Madonna Ugly. 07:22.091 --> 07:26.614 [SPEAKER_01]: Madonna said that, Madonna said that Lady Gaga stole all of her, you know, whatever. 07:26.995 --> 07:27.275 [SPEAKER_01]: Right. 07:27.595 --> 07:31.238 [SPEAKER_01]: So we were like, no, we are supporting the new young Pop Girls. 07:31.718 --> 07:32.779 [SPEAKER_01]: We don't want you to get caught. 07:32.819 --> 07:33.740 [SPEAKER_01]: We love you, divas. 07:33.960 --> 07:40.946 [SPEAKER_00]: And thank you for doing that, Nick, because I do remember hearing CCM had a reputation, but I will also say that, 07:42.487 --> 07:58.369 [SPEAKER_00]: I was very much, I auditioned for all the musical theater schools except CCM because my parents were like, you're not going to a conservatory in the cut program as a two intense and blah, blah, blah, blah, but the reputation back in these days was that CCM created. 07:59.330 --> 08:03.954 [SPEAKER_00]: chorus people, which there's nothing wrong with that, but that was like the like the like stereo time. 08:04.034 --> 08:06.737 [SPEAKER_01]: Like the people who work in who can dance. 08:07.758 --> 08:11.761 [SPEAKER_01]: You see a name for it was like cute chorus boys, like the, I don't know, something like a thing. 08:11.801 --> 08:12.302 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I don't know. 08:12.742 --> 08:15.064 [SPEAKER_01]: I mean, we say that, but like look at the Tony Noms right now. 08:15.084 --> 08:16.345 [SPEAKER_01]: It's just trying to be in Marlemandell. 08:17.146 --> 08:19.087 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, I forgot to shut up being went there. 08:19.107 --> 08:24.311 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, no, no, it's the, the Titanic of it all is beyond amazing. 08:24.571 --> 08:36.058 [SPEAKER_00]: And I, I kind of love the era that were even though like Hollywood and Broadway are dare I say crumbling or at least the way it's being run is not exactly thriving. 08:36.398 --> 08:43.703 [SPEAKER_00]: I sort of love the Marlemandelles of the world, the dropout TV's of the world of like the creators who are just like, you know, 08:44.203 --> 08:47.646 [SPEAKER_00]: hitting rock bottom, starting their own thing, and then getting back to the top. 08:48.487 --> 09:00.458 [SPEAKER_00]: But since this is not a musical theater BFA podcast, and it is a gay ass podcast, I think it's only fair that I ask you the famous podcast question Nick Locklin, which is, Who's fault? 09:00.939 --> 09:02.220 [SPEAKER_00]: Is it that your gay? 09:02.320 --> 09:03.321 [SPEAKER_00]: Who do we blame? 09:03.701 --> 09:04.002 [SPEAKER_01]: Babe. 09:04.502 --> 09:11.345 [SPEAKER_01]: Okay, so there was a there were five women that were the pregame, but I was like too young to figure it out, which were the spice girls when I was six. 09:11.745 --> 09:11.985 [SPEAKER_00]: Sure. 09:12.105 --> 09:17.727 [SPEAKER_01]: And that was like my first grab onto, you know, queerness, whatever, dancing, realm, memorizing, whatever. 09:18.127 --> 09:19.288 [SPEAKER_01]: But the moment was 09:20.188 --> 09:25.251 [SPEAKER_01]: The oops I did it again, VMA performance in 1999 or 2000. 09:25.271 --> 09:25.791 [SPEAKER_01]: I can't remember. 09:26.051 --> 09:26.251 [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah. 09:26.291 --> 09:32.154 [SPEAKER_01]: When that woman was in that nude sparkly body suit, flames in her eyes when she did the thing, oh, I did it again. 09:32.174 --> 09:34.515 [SPEAKER_01]: I was screaming at the TV. 09:34.695 --> 09:36.256 [SPEAKER_01]: I was like, no, I'm literally gay. 09:36.957 --> 09:39.298 [SPEAKER_01]: That was my like, this is it, came out when it was 13. 09:40.198 --> 09:45.763 [SPEAKER_00]: I was going to ask, so they have the year of our Lord, 99, so I was 2,000, you were 13 years old. 09:46.163 --> 09:53.228 [SPEAKER_01]: But then I would say, from 9 to 13, I had a few girlfriends that I would tell I was different. 09:53.669 --> 09:57.412 [SPEAKER_01]: I wasn't saying, I was like, I think I like boys, like quietly. 09:57.952 --> 10:02.735 [SPEAKER_01]: but I like came out in eighth grade in 2003 in Ohio, which was not chill. 10:03.356 --> 10:07.359 [SPEAKER_01]: I don't, the confidence of 13 year-old Nick in 2003, I wish I could have back. 10:07.719 --> 10:08.840 [SPEAKER_01]: He didn't knock of a fuck. 10:09.260 --> 10:13.503 [SPEAKER_01]: I literally had like, I had a hot topic like rainbow bracelet sparkles. 10:13.943 --> 10:16.865 [SPEAKER_01]: Did the like the guy liner, because I wanted to be like pop punk. 10:17.226 --> 10:19.968 [SPEAKER_01]: Kelly Osborne was my like, I'd love that point for some reason. 10:20.628 --> 10:21.828 [SPEAKER_00]: Do you know what makes me cry? 10:22.628 --> 10:30.490 [SPEAKER_00]: No matter who it is, it's when I think of, I'm first of all, proud of you and in all of you that could not have been me. 10:30.850 --> 10:39.512 [SPEAKER_00]: What makes me cry is when I think about like the sad girls and eighth grade who sit on the toilet and eat their turkey sandwich alone and they don't have the confident. 10:39.552 --> 10:42.572 [SPEAKER_00]: Like that's like, did you see the movie spanglish back in the day? 10:43.152 --> 10:44.773 [SPEAKER_00]: No, but I saw it in the house and they do that. 10:45.373 --> 10:45.753 [SPEAKER_01]: Exactly. 10:45.773 --> 10:46.873 [SPEAKER_01]: It's a mean girl's movie does that. 10:47.293 --> 10:55.757 [SPEAKER_00]: In Spanglish, which is a niche Adam Sandler hit, but there's the dorter in the film. 10:56.137 --> 10:58.718 [SPEAKER_00]: She is struggling with, you know, body image. 10:58.798 --> 11:01.559 [SPEAKER_00]: She's like, you know, quote unquote a chunk or girl. 11:01.579 --> 11:09.163 [SPEAKER_00]: Of course, she's like the most normal size human, but she has a pair of jeans that like the like woman that is helping the family. 11:09.183 --> 11:12.804 [SPEAKER_00]: I've been watching years, but what I remember is like, the woman who's like helping the family, 11:15.438 --> 11:27.266 [SPEAKER_00]: extent makes her jeans bigger without her knowing so she doesn't worry about it and she like that like like a like a like a young fat girl embracing herself it can make me crying about two seconds. 11:27.326 --> 11:29.907 [SPEAKER_00]: I just I just remember feeling like a young fat girl. 11:29.947 --> 11:38.833 [SPEAKER_00]: I really like what do you think it was about your delusional confidence of coming out in Ohio at 13 like who do we attribute to or what do we attribute it to? 11:40.227 --> 11:44.849 [SPEAKER_01]: Um, I definitely would say, uh, my dad was really chill weirdly. 11:45.649 --> 11:47.290 [SPEAKER_01]: Um, it was like I told my dad to her breakfast. 11:47.510 --> 11:49.431 [SPEAKER_01]: He literally was like, okay, son, let's go to school. 11:49.831 --> 12:00.916 [SPEAKER_01]: My mom was not chill at the time, but also, like, 2003 HIV thing, like, I'm like, she was more, she was not, like, you're going, like, like, you're going to church, whatever. 12:00.936 --> 12:02.777 [SPEAKER_01]: She was like, what is your 13? 12:02.957 --> 12:05.198 [SPEAKER_01]: Like, this is, you know, she didn't have the, 12:05.958 --> 12:07.038 [SPEAKER_01]: She didn't know what to do. 12:07.138 --> 12:10.579 [SPEAKER_01]: So she was strict and nervous about it, but we got that we got it out of the way. 12:10.959 --> 12:13.560 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm glad that I felt bad for my friends. 12:13.580 --> 12:22.583 [SPEAKER_01]: We're like still figuring it out senior year into, I mean, I have my class, CCM started with four gay boys and ended with like seven or eight. 12:23.203 --> 12:25.706 [SPEAKER_01]: Wow, I can't imagine figuring that out in college. 12:25.926 --> 12:39.440 [SPEAKER_01]: I was like I was so done with all of the like I already had boyfriend's I had I know how to have my dad was even cool enough to be like this is he's like I don't know when you're gonna like start having sex, but this is what HIV is these are what condoms are you have to wear them? 12:39.960 --> 12:43.662 [SPEAKER_01]: like to have that knowledge show young was and I was also there. 12:43.702 --> 12:45.102 [SPEAKER_01]: I was shaving an eighth grade. 12:45.182 --> 12:46.803 [SPEAKER_01]: I had my voice dropped in fifth grade. 12:47.103 --> 12:53.386 [SPEAKER_01]: I was the kid that went to a people who were the earliest was the tallest and then became the shortest because I was just you know it leveled out. 12:53.886 --> 12:55.486 [SPEAKER_01]: So I think I was just more mature young. 12:57.027 --> 12:58.990 [SPEAKER_00]: Um, I shout out your dad for a second. 12:59.010 --> 13:14.950 [SPEAKER_00]: We always we always we always hold out the good straight man the cool dad I also love that your parents sort of turned the archetype on its head of the dad was like oh, you're you're it's whatever you're eating Eggs for breakfast and the mom was the one who had normal road, but She's also by the way my world 13:15.430 --> 13:16.030 [SPEAKER_01]: love that woman. 13:16.090 --> 13:25.794 [SPEAKER_00]: I also tell you everything you post, you and your mom have the most beautiful relationship and we're going to get into what she said about your fiancé, we're going to get into the mom and all. 13:26.694 --> 13:34.697 [SPEAKER_00]: But I just, I love someone like you that has an inherent unapologetic gainous at such a young age. 13:34.717 --> 13:36.357 [SPEAKER_00]: I, again, it could not have been me. 13:36.517 --> 13:39.678 [SPEAKER_00]: I was the one who came out right before I went to college, which I am happy with. 13:39.698 --> 13:40.519 [SPEAKER_01]: Would you know what that? 13:40.599 --> 13:41.219 [SPEAKER_01]: Everyone has their own journey. 13:41.239 --> 13:57.210 [SPEAKER_00]: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no 13:58.090 --> 14:10.117 [SPEAKER_00]: Well, you know, I'll ask on Substack when we get to the paywall about the dirty truth about your exploration as a person because I think that's an interesting topic. 14:10.197 --> 14:24.425 [SPEAKER_00]: But why don't we for a second just scroll ahead to you've come out, you've gone to CCM and then you've created this career out of a musical theater performer into a complete multi-hifinette. 14:24.885 --> 14:28.107 [SPEAKER_00]: is are the rumors true that you did the book of Mormon tour back in 2012? 14:28.468 --> 14:28.708 [SPEAKER_01]: Yes. 14:29.068 --> 14:32.230 [SPEAKER_01]: So I did book of Mormon for three years. 14:32.290 --> 14:34.252 [SPEAKER_00]: I was one of the best plants under studies, really cool. 14:34.712 --> 14:36.153 [SPEAKER_01]: Wait, that's wild. 14:36.213 --> 14:36.613 [SPEAKER_01]: Very cool. 14:36.653 --> 14:44.399 [SPEAKER_01]: He's honestly, he never missed a show, literally always so locked in, making everyone laugh tears, real tears every night, unbelievable. 14:44.579 --> 14:49.382 [SPEAKER_01]: It was honestly, I was older than him and kind of, you know, from CCM being like, who's this young kid who book this? 14:49.402 --> 14:50.123 [SPEAKER_01]: I don't know who he was. 14:50.783 --> 14:53.484 [SPEAKER_00]: And he played, um, he played, kind of hunting him, right? 14:53.524 --> 14:53.744 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah. 14:53.945 --> 14:56.906 [SPEAKER_01]: And he was truly like, I was learning from him every night. 14:56.986 --> 14:59.427 [SPEAKER_01]: I was like, whoa, this kid is fucking cool. 14:59.447 --> 15:03.049 [SPEAKER_00]: Listen, then Pat has been given a lot of shit for many reasons. 15:03.589 --> 15:05.850 [SPEAKER_00]: One of them being the neppo baby of it all. 15:06.030 --> 15:12.934 [SPEAKER_00]: I will say that when there's a neppo baby like him that has that level of talent, what are you going to do? 15:13.094 --> 15:13.994 [SPEAKER_00]: Not make him a star. 15:14.074 --> 15:14.814 [SPEAKER_00]: And we're sick. 15:15.155 --> 15:15.855 [SPEAKER_01]: He's not a diva. 15:15.975 --> 15:18.076 [SPEAKER_01]: He shows, he like, that's, yeah, 15:20.217 --> 15:21.557 [SPEAKER_01]: You know, was a pretty sweet kid. 15:21.597 --> 15:23.118 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, whoops. 15:23.138 --> 15:27.879 [SPEAKER_01]: I mean, whoops, does obviously, there are pros and cons to that, you know, never will be sometimes. 15:27.919 --> 15:39.822 [SPEAKER_00]: But I think that he's a bar that he exactly, he got that far that early because he had the talent and the work ethic to match the sort of like benefit of having a powerful dad. 15:40.142 --> 15:45.403 [SPEAKER_01]: And I know as many of Neville babies that have every like every fast or like every 15:46.203 --> 15:48.505 [SPEAKER_01]: help whatever you want to call it and truly go nowhere. 15:48.885 --> 15:58.012 [SPEAKER_01]: So I don't think that he would he would sure it was a boost, but he would not be the almost egot before 30 man he is today without a promise. 15:58.032 --> 15:58.792 [SPEAKER_01]: He got really? 15:58.872 --> 15:59.653 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm Joe, I joke. 15:59.713 --> 16:01.194 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm like, well, doesn't he have three of them? 16:02.134 --> 16:02.935 [SPEAKER_01]: All right. 16:02.955 --> 16:03.816 [SPEAKER_00]: You know, I wouldn't. 16:04.496 --> 16:05.878 [SPEAKER_00]: Be sure for sure. 16:06.178 --> 16:15.631 [SPEAKER_00]: I've always joked that I always joke that he was gonna be egot before 30 or 40 And it's all the gay gay guys in New York jump off never mind let's start. 16:15.751 --> 16:16.312 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, so mean 16:18.522 --> 16:19.923 [SPEAKER_00]: Was I being mean, Nick? 16:19.963 --> 16:22.644 [SPEAKER_01]: No, no, no, everyone that gives him shit, you know. 16:23.244 --> 16:23.784 [SPEAKER_01]: I agree. 16:24.044 --> 16:25.985 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm like always in the room defending him. 16:26.085 --> 16:28.126 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm always in the room defending him and Janspor. 16:28.486 --> 16:31.768 [SPEAKER_01]: People that are like, do really well. 16:32.008 --> 16:37.850 [SPEAKER_01]: The people that made my call them tri-hards, whatever, I'm like, okay, so they try their best and do it. 16:38.371 --> 16:40.011 [SPEAKER_01]: And we like, oh, like tri-hards. 16:40.472 --> 16:46.434 [SPEAKER_00]: I'd much rather be a tri-hard than a cool kid who never put himself out there. 16:48.735 --> 16:50.397 [SPEAKER_00]: Listen, that team's great point though. 16:50.678 --> 16:56.183 [SPEAKER_00]: I think you just inspired me to make this next chapter of my life a tri-hard summer. 16:56.424 --> 17:08.576 [SPEAKER_00]: I like I I'm I think the more I do this shit and the more I like shed the idea of coolness like Give you the most stupid niche reference, but it's like people who only type in lower cases. 17:09.117 --> 17:09.377 [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, yeah 17:10.838 --> 17:15.061 [SPEAKER_00]: I've done that with certain projects and whatever, like, whatever, captions. 17:15.101 --> 17:16.242 [SPEAKER_00]: Who gives a fuck? 17:16.282 --> 17:19.444 [SPEAKER_00]: But like, I have started to think like, why am I doing that? 17:19.664 --> 17:21.965 [SPEAKER_00]: Like, like, yeah, I'm not cool. 17:22.445 --> 17:25.727 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it doesn't make you cool or to just like, I remember that era too. 17:25.747 --> 17:33.092 [SPEAKER_01]: Like, when you did your Instagram post, the caption was supposed to be all lowercase and like one emoji, whatever, like, oh, 17:33.512 --> 17:37.094 [SPEAKER_01]: But I will say the opposite of that is, do you know, George, do you follow her in Twitter? 17:37.574 --> 17:40.036 [SPEAKER_01]: She realizes the beginning of every word. 17:40.556 --> 17:41.576 [SPEAKER_01]: I haven't seen that actually. 17:41.596 --> 17:43.217 [SPEAKER_01]: Which, that's so much work. 17:43.558 --> 17:46.819 [SPEAKER_01]: There's no phone that's at this point does her phone automatically do it. 17:47.180 --> 17:49.641 [SPEAKER_01]: Like, I genuinely going to ask her when I see her in it. 17:50.041 --> 17:52.002 [SPEAKER_01]: Is she going back in capitalizing every word? 17:52.422 --> 17:53.123 [SPEAKER_01]: What's the truth? 17:53.263 --> 17:54.463 [SPEAKER_01]: I think it looks really pretty. 17:54.964 --> 17:56.345 [SPEAKER_01]: As, aesthetically, it looks great. 17:56.845 --> 17:59.546 [SPEAKER_01]: It's, you know, it looks, we'll talk about her in her. 17:59.666 --> 18:01.707 [SPEAKER_00]: She is trying hard to make every first letter. 18:02.888 --> 18:03.848 [SPEAKER_00]: teal eyes. 18:04.949 --> 18:12.191 [SPEAKER_00]: The other cool part of your lore is that you did book of Mormon as a were you a twink back then? 18:12.331 --> 18:13.051 [SPEAKER_01]: This is what happened. 18:13.191 --> 18:15.651 [SPEAKER_01]: I have done this on every podcast I have a quick version. 18:16.012 --> 18:20.953 [SPEAKER_01]: When I started performing, I liked boy bands, I liked Spice Girls, I wanted to be a pop star. 18:21.233 --> 18:28.635 [SPEAKER_01]: I literally was like pissed at my mom and dad were married for 11 years and had me on their 11th year of marriage and I was like you guys could have had me and I could have been an insane. 18:28.955 --> 18:30.015 [SPEAKER_01]: Like if I was 10 years older 18:32.396 --> 18:57.710 [SPEAKER_01]: then I found out that like musical theater was like so I even did a I was in a mini like boy band that was practicing in Cincinnati but like because 90 degrees is from there but we never went anywhere it was um um but so I was like okay musical theater is a bit next best thing because I enjoyed the musicals and I realized I loved acting out of comedy so then so I got to see Sam and I like didn't know who check off was I didn't know like all of my other classmates were like 19:01.232 --> 19:01.732 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I do. 19:01.873 --> 19:02.353 [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, town. 19:02.833 --> 19:04.355 [SPEAKER_01]: I had, yeah, I had X actor though. 19:04.435 --> 19:09.378 [SPEAKER_01]: I was the one like giving shows like wacky just like extra on whatever. 19:09.579 --> 19:25.851 [SPEAKER_01]: But yeah, so then all of that happened and then I did musical theater and then right like truly booked booked Mormon right at a school which is so lucky right place right time sure I'm talented but still great opportunity and then doing it right after school after like three years. 19:26.492 --> 19:28.654 [SPEAKER_01]: So we did a sit down in Chicago and then we just sit down and 19:30.475 --> 19:32.816 [SPEAKER_01]: by a Los Angeles, I was really burnt out. 19:32.997 --> 19:34.958 [SPEAKER_01]: I was a swing, so I was understanding all of that. 19:35.598 --> 19:39.560 [SPEAKER_01]: It was very much, and also it's just very core music author, it is what it has to be. 19:39.600 --> 19:45.944 [SPEAKER_01]: You have to recreate that experience that people want to see every single night, and you sort of have to do what the people you're doing. 19:46.605 --> 19:50.087 [SPEAKER_01]: You can't like as a swing, you can't add too much different energy when you come in. 19:50.747 --> 19:52.747 [SPEAKER_01]: I got just kind of, it didn't feel as creative. 19:52.887 --> 19:54.708 [SPEAKER_01]: I was feeling more drawn to other things. 19:54.788 --> 19:58.229 [SPEAKER_01]: And then I walked up to, I saw Alaska Thunderfuck my now, my best friend. 19:58.829 --> 20:01.669 [SPEAKER_01]: I walked up to her at a bar when I was in Mormon. 20:01.889 --> 20:03.790 [SPEAKER_01]: And we had had a million opening nights at this point. 20:03.810 --> 20:04.690 [SPEAKER_01]: This is like towards the end. 20:04.730 --> 20:06.190 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm like, whoa, God, how many more. 20:06.330 --> 20:09.991 [SPEAKER_01]: So we had an opening at the W. I walked up to her, it was like right after her season. 20:10.071 --> 20:11.611 [SPEAKER_01]: And I was like, hey, I'm a huge fan of yours. 20:12.151 --> 20:13.652 [SPEAKER_01]: We're here with Book of Mormon. 20:13.792 --> 20:18.233 [SPEAKER_01]: We're inviting people to our opening at the W. We don't come and she was like, I would love that. 20:18.313 --> 20:19.413 [SPEAKER_01]: That's amazing. 20:20.433 --> 20:22.055 [SPEAKER_01]: I mean, you've got a great Alaska. 20:22.335 --> 20:25.819 [SPEAKER_01]: I've literally done it so good that people think it's her. 20:25.899 --> 20:27.480 [SPEAKER_01]: So I'm like going to be her body double. 20:27.520 --> 20:30.143 [SPEAKER_01]: If she doesn't have time for a voice over, something I'll just do it for. 20:30.163 --> 20:30.744 [SPEAKER_01]: 100%. 20:31.224 --> 20:31.805 [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah. 20:32.385 --> 20:40.994 [SPEAKER_00]: But I will say, will you say for a second, that's the gayest podcast, the gayest, ass podcast of all time in her voice? 20:41.135 --> 20:41.395 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah. 20:41.755 --> 20:43.818 [SPEAKER_01]: That's a gay ass podcast. 20:44.198 --> 20:47.182 [SPEAKER_01]: The gayest podcast of all time. 20:47.903 --> 20:49.865 [SPEAKER_01]: Oh god, I love the vocal fry. 20:49.886 --> 20:53.390 [SPEAKER_01]: And you had such a good spot to come up to her and say, I'm a big fan. 20:53.450 --> 20:56.193 [SPEAKER_01]: Again, young Nick doesn't, I feel like I'm way, you know. 20:56.734 --> 20:58.055 [SPEAKER_01]: but so, actually, no, I'm not. 20:58.115 --> 21:07.543 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm literally just as annoying, but I did that and then I started to work with her and I was a dancer in one of her videos and then I got to choreograph. 21:08.104 --> 21:17.932 [SPEAKER_01]: And then there was, we worked with the director who was very open to collaboration and he was like a straight director and had really great ideas for on his end, but he didn't really like get her or the song. 21:17.972 --> 21:19.333 [SPEAKER_01]: So I got to take over as a creative 21:22.516 --> 21:23.337 [SPEAKER_01]: And then I was hooked. 21:23.457 --> 21:26.040 [SPEAKER_01]: I was, I was, there was like, this is what I want to do. 21:26.221 --> 21:31.147 [SPEAKER_01]: But I would say the spawn of my true multi-hifinette was mostly her. 21:31.848 --> 21:36.753 [SPEAKER_01]: She gave me the, she was a sort of my drag mother of like your talented other things. 21:36.914 --> 21:40.738 [SPEAKER_01]: You should go for it and has always boosted my confidence and which is. 21:41.479 --> 21:44.321 [SPEAKER_00]: Beyond there's no value you can attribute to that. 21:44.401 --> 22:00.052 [SPEAKER_00]: I feel like half more than half of this industry is Having the confidence to continue to put shit out because I you know talk about I know I'm about imposter syndrome and all that shit, but I think as that's the hardest thing They keep putting out you guys work the hardest in the Bay is I think Nick. 22:00.212 --> 22:08.578 [SPEAKER_00]: Thank you for saying that it was so hard It's yeah, and I'm doing two episodes a week now, which I actually do my best friend John John Riddle 22:09.941 --> 22:11.742 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, John Riddle was on. 22:11.782 --> 22:14.323 [SPEAKER_00]: Yes, not too long ago. 22:14.843 --> 22:18.545 [SPEAKER_00]: I love that so much and can we shout out John Riddle. 22:18.585 --> 22:29.170 [SPEAKER_00]: He has an amazing episode of this pot, shout out Wayne with Titanic, shout out to I still need to get his gorgeous boyfriend on that is going to be in I need to do that. 22:29.730 --> 22:37.335 [SPEAKER_00]: Uh, but the other thing that's crazy about this week is I'm having you on and Nick Locklin and then I'm having a Hogan McLaughlin on so too. 22:37.355 --> 22:38.055 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, and Loughlin. 22:38.075 --> 22:38.695 [SPEAKER_00]: Loughlin. 22:39.336 --> 22:40.937 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, so we love that. 22:41.297 --> 22:46.140 [SPEAKER_00]: But uh, I think that you have done something that my first therapist, Fran Goldfarb shout out. 22:46.440 --> 22:49.222 [SPEAKER_00]: My first therapist said something to me whenever I spiraled. 22:49.962 --> 22:53.024 [SPEAKER_00]: And I think you've done a beautifully, which is you let it be organic. 22:53.504 --> 23:05.411 [SPEAKER_00]: You follow your gas bliss, you say hello to Alaska, you are working on shoots and realizing you have a creator, direct press inside of you, and then you, you know, organically grow from there. 23:05.751 --> 23:09.673 [SPEAKER_00]: In fact, listeners might be gagged to find out. 23:09.933 --> 23:16.777 [SPEAKER_00]: You have directed for Dillon Mulvaney, obviously Alaska Thunderfock, a Twink and a Red had some really great videos. 23:17.017 --> 23:23.501 [SPEAKER_00]: you also directed Adina Menzel's music video for her very gay anthem move. 23:23.521 --> 23:26.743 [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I don't know, I mean, I wish I were. 23:26.923 --> 23:37.449 [SPEAKER_00]: Now, you, do you, this is gonna be a tacky question, but I think I wanna go in the direction of being a more radically honest with this podcast. 23:37.729 --> 23:41.071 [SPEAKER_00]: Do you have a day job or is your creative stuff paying the bills? 23:41.742 --> 23:44.283 [SPEAKER_01]: So yeah, I would say, that's a great question. 23:44.803 --> 23:46.383 [SPEAKER_01]: I have gotten into it. 23:46.423 --> 23:55.085 [SPEAKER_01]: So because I am so deep in the multi-hive in it, my day job is nightlife, which used to be one of my dreams. 23:55.245 --> 23:56.005 [SPEAKER_01]: And it still is. 23:56.325 --> 23:58.605 [SPEAKER_01]: I really impression it about the nightlife I do. 23:59.046 --> 24:00.386 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah. 24:00.406 --> 24:02.186 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm now getting to, like, I'm nearing 40. 24:02.286 --> 24:05.027 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm like, I don't know if my journey is to be like 55. 24:06.607 --> 24:12.789 [SPEAKER_01]: at three dollar bill producing major events all the time, like I think that I would, you know, but there's something wrong with that. 24:12.809 --> 24:27.434 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm just, I have at least gotten to the point of wanting to do if I'm gonna do nightlife, I want to be really proud of it and not just like throw a pop star in a poster and whatever, but yeah, so I have a bear party called Goldilocks. 24:28.494 --> 24:55.473 [SPEAKER_01]: And I've had that for three and a half years where I basically kept going to bear parties at There's a thing called bear happy hour, which is very social and fun and adorable and then Sort of that's it and then I've also like gone to the eagle where it's like like leather strapped to a wall Blah blah blah and I was like there has to be something in between like yeah I want to I want to party where we can socialize and then if we want to you know make out be a little whatever 24:56.133 --> 24:56.774 [SPEAKER_01]: you can do both. 24:56.854 --> 25:02.899 [SPEAKER_01]: So my party is truly upstairs is like you grab a cup which I was inspired by hot dog my favorite party in the world. 25:03.200 --> 25:03.520 [SPEAKER_01]: Shout out. 25:03.540 --> 25:05.102 [SPEAKER_01]: Grab a cup to I love Mario. 25:05.122 --> 25:05.602 [SPEAKER_01]: He's incredible. 25:06.563 --> 25:11.988 [SPEAKER_01]: Literally favorite party in the world and in a city that is the worst party town in the world, which is hilarious. 25:12.188 --> 25:13.209 [SPEAKER_01]: Let's Angela's girl. 25:14.190 --> 25:14.671 [SPEAKER_01]: You don't do that. 25:14.691 --> 25:16.112 [SPEAKER_00]: How am I, you know? 25:16.273 --> 25:22.961 [SPEAKER_01]: I mean, the Donna says, let go to Los Angeles if you want to sleep in the next long. 25:23.121 --> 25:29.268 [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I'm not a nightlife master and I literally went to my first circuit party last year. 25:29.489 --> 25:32.673 [SPEAKER_00]: So I'm not anyone to defend LA's nightlife. 25:33.514 --> 25:36.497 [SPEAKER_01]: I do like work not I love Los Angeles. 25:36.517 --> 25:41.842 [SPEAKER_01]: I love together and just like chill out Will you be my drag mother of New York light night life when I visit? 25:41.902 --> 25:42.383 [SPEAKER_00]: Absolutely. 25:42.403 --> 25:45.866 [SPEAKER_00]: I will give you because I I would I yeah I haven't done it up. 25:46.066 --> 25:47.468 [SPEAKER_00]: There's actually okay. 25:47.488 --> 25:49.029 [SPEAKER_00]: This is a tease for sub stack, but you 25:50.050 --> 25:53.352 [SPEAKER_00]: I recently posted a really hot shirtless pick at some gay party. 25:53.372 --> 25:57.214 [SPEAKER_01]: Can I never do what I need to do more because the DMs were crazy? 25:57.755 --> 26:05.719 [SPEAKER_01]: I was like, I have like a finsta and sometimes on Twitter, but I always get nervous my mom because one time I posted this like leather pick. 26:06.280 --> 26:13.004 [SPEAKER_01]: She was like, I've done, I've seen a lot, but she was like, my friends at work were like, whoa, is he a leather daddy now and I was like, oh, okay. 26:13.044 --> 26:13.964 [SPEAKER_01]: It's tasteful and chic. 26:13.984 --> 26:15.245 [SPEAKER_01]: It was a professional opportunity. 26:15.265 --> 26:16.586 [SPEAKER_00]: It was like, sure it was. 26:19.067 --> 26:31.813 [SPEAKER_00]: Ice gays are in an interesting position with our birth families, our hetero people, because we're torn between two worlds. 26:32.333 --> 26:44.618 [SPEAKER_00]: I've had to really divorce myself from what will my parents think when I post stuff and it's been hard, but you know, we can't worry about what your mom's co-workers are saying, even though it doesn't matter if you are a 26:47.079 --> 26:48.700 [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, that was the person she asked. 26:48.840 --> 26:49.761 [SPEAKER_01]: She's never asked before. 26:49.781 --> 26:55.944 [SPEAKER_01]: That was the one she was like can you just she's like can you just put that on your finsta Like I was like, okay, all right mom too. 26:55.984 --> 26:57.865 [SPEAKER_00]: She know there were finsta shot out to your mom. 26:58.005 --> 26:58.286 [SPEAKER_01]: Yes. 26:58.706 --> 27:05.950 [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, well, she knows that is this my finsta is a Starla like like Marla, but she's like put it on starla 27:07.791 --> 27:11.555 [SPEAKER_01]: And no one would have been that no one would have been that it's private. 27:11.615 --> 27:15.139 [SPEAKER_01]: No, I'm not me shouting on my own fist as I don't hear. 27:15.219 --> 27:16.180 [SPEAKER_00]: Will you accept me, Nick? 27:16.381 --> 27:17.021 [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe, yeah. 27:17.722 --> 27:21.186 [SPEAKER_01]: Okay, all but I do have a spin stick close friends, which is a dark circle of hell. 27:21.606 --> 27:28.894 [SPEAKER_01]: Like that is like truly like, I trust you more than anything that is like, okay, there's like my my, my name, my name, close friends. 27:29.334 --> 27:30.735 [SPEAKER_01]: Main close friends is mostly sexy. 27:31.216 --> 27:51.131 [SPEAKER_01]: Then there's Starla which is already your close to me and then Starla close friends, which is like if someone sees the my friends will be like if I see a green circle on Starla I'm like running to my phone like they're like what is this yeah gauge journalists hat on how many people are on Starla's close friends Like 40 oh, okay, okay, okay, okay. 27:51.171 --> 27:52.312 [SPEAKER_01]: I love a lot of friends 27:53.497 --> 27:55.438 [SPEAKER_00]: Like that I trust not even trying to be a bitch. 27:55.518 --> 27:57.658 [SPEAKER_00]: I just have a I You're not a bad guy. 27:57.698 --> 28:21.246 [SPEAKER_01]: I say you're not over the trends because I'm like, I need to be able to say in the house sometimes and I have a lot of my poor fiance has had to memorize my groups because there's like the bear group which is his favorite The the dolls my drag queens my dolls then there's like my muscle actor hotz that I like you know grew up in Yes, all those was John that will cause all those like those are my babies and then there's like the 28:22.366 --> 28:24.849 [SPEAKER_01]: my like film friends, like my, you know, whatever. 28:24.909 --> 28:29.974 [SPEAKER_01]: So he's had to, and my at home friends, so he's had to, and none of them really crossover of that much. 28:30.054 --> 28:30.935 [SPEAKER_00]: Interesting. 28:31.075 --> 28:36.420 [SPEAKER_00]: Which is, you're sort of like a, you've got different brothels and different parts of town and different parts of the country. 28:37.081 --> 28:41.145 [SPEAKER_00]: Can we, can we dive in for a second to the engagement of it all? 28:41.205 --> 28:42.747 [SPEAKER_00]: I want to give you a huge moth on my mind. 28:44.188 --> 28:52.310 [SPEAKER_00]: In April, you posted, if you told me a year ago today that in one year, I'd be fully you all lesbian moved in with the handsome British man from Scruff. 28:52.370 --> 28:53.630 [SPEAKER_00]: I was about to get a drink with. 28:53.710 --> 29:01.912 [SPEAKER_00]: I would have said, L.O.L.D.Va relax, then you tell them what he's a handsome charming prince from the English Country side. 29:02.012 --> 29:08.254 [SPEAKER_00]: And then you say, my mom tells her friends that I found my hallmark movie and she's absolutely right. 29:08.754 --> 29:09.194 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to cry. 29:09.214 --> 29:11.554 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to cut to me crying too. 29:11.594 --> 29:13.455 [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, what's so hallmarky about it? 29:14.535 --> 29:19.738 [SPEAKER_01]: Well, first of all, that post is, I cannot, that's my most like post of all time. 29:20.298 --> 29:24.340 [SPEAKER_01]: I literally was just trying to do a sweet, you know, anniversary post or a birthday post. 29:24.440 --> 29:26.821 [SPEAKER_01]: I was picking through photos sitting on a cafe. 29:26.841 --> 29:27.862 [SPEAKER_01]: I mean, like, oh, it's our anniversary. 29:27.902 --> 29:30.403 [SPEAKER_01]: I should post, like, and then I just started to flow out of me. 29:30.423 --> 29:33.345 [SPEAKER_01]: And I think I got emotional that I, how did this all happen? 29:33.845 --> 29:35.226 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah. 29:36.806 --> 29:39.868 [SPEAKER_01]: And then at that post, at that day, I wasn't engaged. 29:40.148 --> 29:41.429 [SPEAKER_01]: And then that night. 29:42.189 --> 29:45.852 [SPEAKER_01]: He was like, I want to take a picture, because your post is doing so all online. 29:46.012 --> 29:46.732 [SPEAKER_01]: I want to take a picture. 29:46.752 --> 29:47.773 [SPEAKER_01]: So we're going to go over this thing. 29:47.793 --> 29:48.954 [SPEAKER_01]: We were having an anniversary dinner. 29:49.414 --> 29:51.515 [SPEAKER_01]: And the people were taking a photo. 29:51.736 --> 29:53.157 [SPEAKER_01]: And then he just proposed right there. 29:53.177 --> 29:55.498 [SPEAKER_01]: And I was like, you crazy boy. 29:55.678 --> 29:56.679 [SPEAKER_01]: We're so intelligent. 29:56.699 --> 29:57.500 [SPEAKER_01]: Tell us. 29:57.520 --> 29:59.021 [SPEAKER_00]: Tell us your beautiful fiance's name. 29:59.561 --> 30:00.382 [SPEAKER_01]: His name is Locklin. 30:00.662 --> 30:01.682 [SPEAKER_01]: Which is so. 30:01.963 --> 30:04.024 [SPEAKER_00]: Locklin is engaged to Nick. 30:04.184 --> 30:04.744 [SPEAKER_00]: Locklin. 30:05.565 --> 30:08.427 [SPEAKER_00]: And he is a sexy British press. 30:11.469 --> 30:13.431 [SPEAKER_00]: his favorite group of yours is your bare group. 30:13.791 --> 30:14.692 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, honestly. 30:14.732 --> 30:16.033 [SPEAKER_00]: How do you feel about the word chaser? 30:17.113 --> 30:19.875 [SPEAKER_01]: I, so in my Goldilocks party, I call them in my ears. 30:20.356 --> 30:22.337 [SPEAKER_01]: Because chasers don't like to be called chasers. 30:22.838 --> 30:24.139 [SPEAKER_01]: Us bears call them chasers all the time. 30:24.499 --> 30:24.659 [SPEAKER_01]: Right. 30:24.679 --> 30:27.961 [SPEAKER_01]: They don't like, it's like the, I feel like no one likes the word bisexual anymore. 30:28.042 --> 30:33.325 [SPEAKER_01]: Like they don't, they want to, you know, it's a pan now or what, there's a stick that gets attached to certain words. 30:34.086 --> 30:41.694 [SPEAKER_01]: Whereas I do think Chaser does have a negative connotation to it, I guess, to say it's sort of there are ethical chasers and unethical chasers. 30:41.834 --> 30:47.820 [SPEAKER_01]: And me and my bear group have a group called unethical chasers where we literally share the crazy shit they'll send you. 30:48.080 --> 30:49.661 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, real unethical chasers. 30:49.761 --> 30:50.362 [SPEAKER_00]: No. 30:50.702 --> 30:51.383 [SPEAKER_01]: Oh my god. 30:51.463 --> 30:53.025 [SPEAKER_01]: Like they want a Fiji pizza. 30:53.045 --> 30:54.026 [SPEAKER_01]: They call you big. 30:54.046 --> 30:54.967 [SPEAKER_01]: Like, oh my it is like, 30:55.667 --> 31:13.415 [SPEAKER_01]: It is like truly crazy sometimes because they have power and being like a muscle man at that never so that if they enter a group of men Who they think seemingly are less fit or whatever that and I will say, you know, it There it isn't as some I think the world's changing but like for a lot of bears 31:14.535 --> 31:19.818 [SPEAKER_01]: The, when you're a lot of my muscle friends will be like, they'll come to bear parties and they're like, they're bears are a little stand-offish. 31:19.858 --> 31:21.939 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm like, yeah, because they've been called fat their whole lives. 31:22.360 --> 31:24.141 [SPEAKER_01]: And they think that someone like you might do that. 31:24.181 --> 31:27.583 [SPEAKER_01]: And I was like, I swear to God, if you go over there and say, hey, what's up, maybe give them a hug. 31:27.943 --> 31:29.123 [SPEAKER_01]: They're gonna be like, hey, what's up? 31:29.203 --> 31:30.104 [SPEAKER_01]: Like, they're down. 31:30.384 --> 31:33.746 [SPEAKER_01]: Or their other side is some, some theirs only want bears. 31:33.986 --> 31:35.587 [SPEAKER_01]: They're like, I don't want, I don't want you. 31:35.607 --> 31:36.648 [SPEAKER_01]: I know that I need that. 31:36.748 --> 31:41.330 [SPEAKER_00]: There's like a, the tough thing that I have found as I've started to. 31:41.350 --> 31:42.151 [SPEAKER_00]: That's what I'm talking. 31:42.911 --> 32:11.175 [SPEAKER_00]: As an otter king, thank you for saying is I sometimes, if I'm attracted to either a bear or like a like thicker guy, whether it's like muscle or total delicious fluff I get sometimes worried or feel the energy that since I am on the auditory more like I'm trying to I'm trying to dream my brain milk, but like a lot of them are not going to go with someone go for someone that doesn't have mass, you know, and that's like 32:11.495 --> 32:15.357 [SPEAKER_01]: They're a prerogative, obviously, but it's an adventure to find out. 32:15.737 --> 32:17.318 [SPEAKER_01]: Everybody likes their thing, as long as you don't. 32:17.558 --> 32:21.781 [SPEAKER_01]: Like, y'all can anyone else's yams or aren't kind. 32:22.361 --> 32:25.523 [SPEAKER_01]: I never get offended if someone guys like, I'm usually in the slender bodies or whatever. 32:26.003 --> 32:28.424 [SPEAKER_01]: Like, I'm not going to be like, well, fuck you. 32:28.585 --> 32:29.485 [SPEAKER_01]: I mean, that's your type. 32:29.625 --> 32:32.287 [SPEAKER_01]: What I have, I truly, I'm a vibes person. 32:32.567 --> 32:35.208 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm one of these just your fiancee. 32:35.228 --> 32:35.668 [SPEAKER_00]: I like that. 32:35.869 --> 32:39.771 [SPEAKER_01]: In ethical and most, you like, truly the sweetest. 32:40.311 --> 32:52.620 [SPEAKER_00]: Well, that's actually, let me just quickly interrupt to say that there's going to be more of my questions about the admiring on Substack and the sort of like warning as part of it because you have so many great stories. 32:52.680 --> 33:00.666 [SPEAKER_00]: But I think I want to get to a couple of quick, kind of, culturally things before I do the final question. 33:00.826 --> 33:01.567 [SPEAKER_00]: I got to Substack. 33:01.667 --> 33:02.508 [SPEAKER_00]: I know, can you believe? 33:02.988 --> 33:04.369 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm a Virgo, keeping this far. 33:05.918 --> 33:06.459 [SPEAKER_00]: When's your birthday? 33:06.999 --> 33:07.921 [SPEAKER_01]: Um, September 7th. 33:08.021 --> 33:08.381 [SPEAKER_00]: Where about you? 33:08.401 --> 33:10.864 [SPEAKER_00]: Am I in September 21st on the last day? 33:10.884 --> 33:11.605 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, thank God. 33:11.685 --> 33:12.747 [SPEAKER_01]: August for our, we're going. 33:13.187 --> 33:13.447 [SPEAKER_01]: Really? 33:13.467 --> 33:14.108 [SPEAKER_01]: Can you imagine? 33:14.869 --> 33:15.430 [SPEAKER_00]: Can you imagine? 33:16.211 --> 33:17.833 [SPEAKER_00]: Um, all the August of our goes right now. 33:17.853 --> 33:18.093 [SPEAKER_00]: Just. 33:19.154 --> 33:20.576 [SPEAKER_01]: No, I love the August of our go. 33:20.596 --> 33:20.877 [SPEAKER_01]: We're good. 33:20.897 --> 33:21.417 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm so fun. 33:21.557 --> 33:22.258 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm Leo rising. 33:22.278 --> 33:23.159 [SPEAKER_01]: So I like, I feel them. 33:23.680 --> 33:25.082 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm a leader rising up or wait. 33:25.222 --> 33:25.822 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going away. 33:25.842 --> 33:26.423 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm going away. 33:26.703 --> 33:34.031 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm going away that I remember all of our like unfinished tangents and I like love that about us like because I'm an ADHD ever go that me too. 33:34.731 --> 33:38.715 [SPEAKER_01]: That I'm like this is I was like there's four questions that I didn't quite finish but I like love it. 33:38.896 --> 33:40.197 [SPEAKER_00]: We got myself diagnosed. 33:40.237 --> 33:45.763 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm self diagnosed ADHD, Matt loves to roll his eyes when I say that but the proof is in the pudding. 33:46.283 --> 33:50.227 [SPEAKER_00]: Um, you directed for Twink and a Redhead a song called Disney Adults. 33:50.808 --> 33:52.249 [SPEAKER_00]: Um, I find it to be the reason. 33:52.670 --> 33:53.651 [SPEAKER_00]: And how to ride it, shout out. 33:53.951 --> 33:56.794 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm in talks with their people and I'm hoping to get them on the podcast soon. 33:56.814 --> 33:58.015 [SPEAKER_00]: I think they're in good good time. 33:58.375 --> 34:00.678 [SPEAKER_00]: Um, what is your political opinion on Disney Adults? 34:01.823 --> 34:02.844 [SPEAKER_01]: I think they're adorable. 34:03.284 --> 34:08.886 [SPEAKER_01]: I honestly, Grand Ash helped me realize the beauty of them. 34:09.207 --> 34:17.190 [SPEAKER_01]: I used to sort of, I used to be a little, I've never been nervous by a Disney adult, but Disney gay adults when they have their proposals with the Mickey Mouse ears. 34:18.631 --> 34:21.314 [SPEAKER_01]: I would be a little nervous because that's just like not my vibe. 34:21.755 --> 34:29.944 [SPEAKER_01]: But now, like honestly being with them in the plus-size park hoppers, we went to the, we went there, everyone is, those girls like, that is their joy. 34:30.064 --> 34:32.387 [SPEAKER_01]: Like that place is, and it was infectious. 34:32.467 --> 34:33.949 [SPEAKER_01]: And is there, it is fragile? 34:33.969 --> 34:35.270 [SPEAKER_01]: Plus size and park hoppers? 34:35.571 --> 34:37.973 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, there are these, I think six girls that, 34:38.514 --> 34:53.262 [SPEAKER_01]: They're a plus-size and they sort of give other larger-bodied people information on what rides they can ride and not because I guess for a lot of people if they arrive there with a group of friends and then they can't ride the ride their embarrassed because that's sad so they do it for them and 34:54.102 --> 34:54.902 [SPEAKER_01]: sort of post about it. 34:54.942 --> 34:56.723 [SPEAKER_01]: But I got those girls are so strong. 34:57.063 --> 35:04.685 [SPEAKER_01]: The hate that they get every, I sometimes, when I have the time I grab a few of the comments, I'm like, why do you have to come here and do this? 35:06.065 --> 35:11.286 [SPEAKER_00]: That's the biggest mistake with the internet is how confident trolls have gotten. 35:11.406 --> 35:13.767 [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I posted one stupid thing. 35:15.147 --> 35:40.999 [SPEAKER_00]: about what it doesn't matter and the amount of comments like that people feel compelled to say it's so insane I can only imagine what that group of girls get for Davis But my only fear about Disney adults is their bank accounts I know that it's really expensive I hope that they are financially as someone who doesn't know how money works I hope that they have a lot of support Whether that's emotional financial or just logistical 35:41.879 --> 35:52.267 [SPEAKER_00]: Um, but listen, I am, like, my vulva is quaking to ask you some more horny questions for sub-sax. 35:52.287 --> 35:57.851 [SPEAKER_00]: So let us get into the final podcast question on the main feed, which is Nick Lockeland. 35:58.051 --> 36:02.734 [SPEAKER_00]: If the world was ending, and you could only save one character act 36:08.228 --> 36:09.849 [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, it's so hard. 36:10.330 --> 36:17.695 [SPEAKER_01]: So like, my good answer is Allison Jenning because she's everything to me, but the other answer is Chris and Wig. 36:19.116 --> 36:19.516 [SPEAKER_01]: Both. 36:19.957 --> 36:20.457 [SPEAKER_01]: I think so. 36:20.497 --> 36:31.245 [SPEAKER_01]: I think because Chris and Wig had the option to play more characters, and Allison Jenning has played one iconic, like Nebraska woman in four or five films 36:32.065 --> 36:38.248 [SPEAKER_01]: it's really hard for me and that I mean no one I feel like no one makes me laugh like those two women and Melissa McCarthy, but it would have to be one of those two. 36:38.528 --> 36:39.208 [SPEAKER_00]: Those are so good. 36:39.288 --> 36:43.550 [SPEAKER_00]: I also just saw that Alice and Janie came out with a movie with Andrew Rannell's. 36:44.090 --> 36:44.991 [SPEAKER_00]: I haven't watched it yet. 36:45.051 --> 36:45.611 [SPEAKER_00]: It looks great. 36:45.651 --> 36:46.271 [SPEAKER_00]: It was written. 36:46.511 --> 36:51.653 [SPEAKER_00]: I think written and directed or just written by Jim Rash, who's like an LA gay icon. 36:51.733 --> 36:53.894 [SPEAKER_00]: So I want to shout out that to support them. 36:54.575 --> 36:59.477 [SPEAKER_00]: Kristen Wig, I'm going to argue made me gay in many ways obviously. 37:00.057 --> 37:04.698 [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, do you even just like the way that she delivered the line, shit, that's fresh and bridesmaid. 37:04.778 --> 37:05.158 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, I'm sorry. 37:05.298 --> 37:05.718 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm an eight. 37:05.758 --> 37:06.838 [SPEAKER_00]: All of it. 37:06.958 --> 37:07.398 [SPEAKER_00]: All of it. 37:07.538 --> 37:13.620 [SPEAKER_00]: It's she, because you know what she doesn't that movie, that is so gay coded, is that she is like not fitting in. 37:13.740 --> 37:18.220 [SPEAKER_00]: She is comparing herself to my Rudolph having this like, oh, yeah, life. 37:18.641 --> 37:21.781 [SPEAKER_00]: She's trying to be creative with her baking business. 37:21.861 --> 37:22.641 [SPEAKER_00]: And that gets fucked. 37:22.661 --> 37:26.062 [SPEAKER_00]: Like there was so much of that that she's genius. 37:26.462 --> 37:42.627 [SPEAKER_00]: is genius, and I love that Allison Janney has come up, Kristen Wigg, Melissa McCarty for your nerves, and I'm very excited, speaking of those character actresses, if in the SNL world, we're shouting out on a gas tire, Rachel Dratch, my Rudolph for their Broadway journeys now. 37:43.127 --> 37:48.008 [SPEAKER_00]: The Tony's are going to be happening right before this gets released, so I'll also talk 37:48.268 --> 37:54.149 [SPEAKER_00]: you all, but Nick Lockelin before we officially start talking about Szechuali today. 37:54.510 --> 37:58.630 [SPEAKER_00]: Can you tell these listeners where to follow you and if there's anything you would like for them to know? 37:59.091 --> 38:09.313 [SPEAKER_01]: It's Nick Laffs on my Instagram and the only thing I think I would love to plug is I am currently finishing a pop musical about astrology. 38:09.353 --> 38:17.335 [SPEAKER_01]: We talked about it a little bit and we released a song a month where two songs behind because we just had some, you know, it's creating your own thing is really, you know, 38:18.455 --> 38:37.285 [SPEAKER_01]: And I, because I'd written for a lot of drag queens, I've written for like, you know, I got to go right with Grant Nash, I was like, I want to write something, you know, from me, and my version in my version of astrology, I, we also have with you found out there's truly a whole another show that has, that is releasing at the same time of us called Signs of Life, which is so great. 38:37.325 --> 38:38.266 [SPEAKER_01]: They're, they're awesome. 38:38.286 --> 38:44.449 [SPEAKER_01]: We parallel shows, and I, first I had a breakdown, I was like, Jesus Christ, we spent, we've been doing this for like four years and, 38:44.929 --> 38:47.650 [SPEAKER_01]: Then my friends like, hey, there were two Joseph's, there were two fanom's. 38:48.030 --> 39:06.378 [SPEAKER_01]: There were like, this, this has got to be, yeah, it's not like either of us, it's a general idea, but I was like, there, there's this very musical theater, very like, I would say the series beautiful, people who really love astrology in a serious way, and ours is like the memeable qualities of astrology, the like, 39:06.458 --> 39:15.425 [SPEAKER_01]: go to like like the cancer songs called Buhu with Matt Rogers, Dilma Bany song is dazzled in areas just like following some of the things. 39:16.125 --> 39:20.949 [SPEAKER_01]: So we are developing that which has been a very creatively fulfilling process. 39:21.009 --> 39:29.716 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm writing with Jesse St. John who is written for Kylie Minogue, for Ken Kelly Clarkson, chair, he wrote DJ Play Chris songs. 39:29.816 --> 39:32.037 [SPEAKER_01]: So I'm learning so much from that man. 39:33.118 --> 39:36.359 [SPEAKER_01]: All of competitors with Halloween album like genius man. 39:36.839 --> 39:43.040 [SPEAKER_01]: He's taught me so much about songwriting and I Whatever, but yes, we were my ultimate dream of this project. 39:43.060 --> 39:59.184 [SPEAKER_01]: We've been releasing it on social media And I want to write I want to do a I want to shoot a small because of a team in LA I want to shoot a small indie film That does this entire project and just like a small indie musical with a like a dream Because I don't want to make it huge. 39:59.204 --> 40:00.464 [SPEAKER_01]: I don't want to make it this big thing. 40:00.504 --> 40:02.285 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I know I can do this 40:03.125 --> 40:04.466 [SPEAKER_01]: So, that's what I'm working on right now. 40:04.486 --> 40:10.329 [SPEAKER_01]: If you want to check that out, that's like my creative outlet, but also, you know, come to Goldilocks. 40:10.489 --> 40:14.211 [SPEAKER_01]: If you like bears in your admirer, go to the Art of Electronic Shows. 40:14.671 --> 40:17.393 [SPEAKER_01]: I think the next one we're going to do is Arianna with Marcia and Jan. 40:17.813 --> 40:20.775 [SPEAKER_01]: Which is going to be gorgeous right before the tour. 40:20.815 --> 40:22.576 [SPEAKER_01]: So yeah, I have my hands and everything. 40:22.596 --> 40:23.356 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm Barbara Strasand. 40:23.837 --> 40:42.672 [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and yes she is and I've linked your Instagram in the in the description I really go check out all of my amazing stuff and I just and constantly impress with your work Who you're surround yourself with your point of view your hustle it is not easy and It's also so great to keep you with you, which is why 40:43.312 --> 40:46.013 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to get us into the horny side of things. 40:46.433 --> 40:49.374 [SPEAKER_00]: You and Nick Locklin are in a beautiful relationship. 40:49.514 --> 40:52.574 [SPEAKER_00]: You are posting yummy shirtless photos. 40:52.694 --> 41:01.677 [SPEAKER_00]: Finally, if I were to ask you about a memorable hook-up or dating experience, we can either pull from the memory banks, we can go recent. 41:01.877 --> 41:06.138 [SPEAKER_00]: Is there anything that was really hot, surprising, exciting, formative? 41:06.278 --> 41:07.298 [SPEAKER_00]: Anything that you would like to share? 41:08.482 --> 41:29.016 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, well, we talked, I text you, obviously I'm like, what can I say that I'm not going to be, you know, my, uh, my coworker is not going to be mad at me for saying, um, I would say, what I think is what we were talking about specifically that I think is an untapped, I don't know, like, it's not talked about as much specifically the like young y2k team gay boy. 41:30.077 --> 41:48.930 [SPEAKER_01]: And what we had, you know, like the online but not quite online thing, I mean me having a blackberry and going on like full-on Craigslist feel like the process and like trying to get one pixelated nude to someone at 18 in like just really trying to figure that out. 41:49.550 --> 41:55.734 [SPEAKER_01]: I was on, I was on vacation with my family in Murdoch and there was a hot, probably closeted man. 41:56.595 --> 42:01.901 [SPEAKER_01]: just Southern, whatever, did not send a Facebook, and we were just going to meet on the boardwalk at night. 42:02.401 --> 42:05.505 [SPEAKER_01]: And I could have been fully, you know, there's no tracking on anything. 42:05.525 --> 42:06.906 [SPEAKER_01]: There's just, it's 2008. 42:08.148 --> 42:12.152 [SPEAKER_01]: And you say that you're on Craigslist.com via your Black on my Blackberry. 42:13.287 --> 42:29.820 [SPEAKER_01]: which is the layer to that, is like just anything to kiss a boy, just truly, um, and we like, he was, then he was the hottest thing I've ever seen in my life, like, truly like six, three, you know, giant blah, blah, blah, and we like hooked up in his car. 42:30.260 --> 42:32.302 [SPEAKER_00]: And wait, wait, wait, let's, let's peel back for a second. 42:32.622 --> 42:35.804 [SPEAKER_00]: You make the, the meetup, uh, 42:36.925 --> 42:38.826 [SPEAKER_00]: Logistics happen via Blackberry. 42:39.246 --> 42:42.708 [SPEAKER_00]: You was he already in his car when you got there. 42:42.728 --> 42:43.509 [SPEAKER_01]: We had to be around the beach. 42:43.949 --> 42:44.890 [SPEAKER_01]: It was actually kind of romantic. 42:44.910 --> 42:45.570 [SPEAKER_01]: We had to be around the beach. 42:45.590 --> 42:47.471 [SPEAKER_01]: It was like, it was like probably one in the morning. 42:47.551 --> 42:48.151 [SPEAKER_01]: No one's there. 42:48.172 --> 42:51.653 [SPEAKER_01]: And it was like the bar beach bar was like close. 42:51.694 --> 42:53.775 [SPEAKER_01]: We hung out there made out a little bit did some stuff there. 42:54.375 --> 42:57.316 [SPEAKER_01]: And he was like, we should go to my truck, whatever truck. 42:57.717 --> 42:59.197 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, you had a truck full on truck. 42:59.297 --> 43:03.960 [SPEAKER_00]: And then we, and you say six, three, are there any other, maybe six, five, not even kidding? 43:04.000 --> 43:05.240 [SPEAKER_00]: She's one of the tallest. 43:05.861 --> 43:09.022 [SPEAKER_01]: A man that I was, I thought, way out of my wheelhouse, truly. 43:09.102 --> 43:09.862 [SPEAKER_01]: And now you were 18, Mary. 43:11.725 --> 43:15.406 [SPEAKER_01]: Uh, yeah, and he is now married to a man and has a child with him. 43:15.626 --> 43:17.887 [SPEAKER_01]: So I, I am happy for them. 43:18.287 --> 43:19.248 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm thrilled for him. 43:19.548 --> 43:25.490 [SPEAKER_01]: Randomly saw his like, we never talked after that, but I randomly saw him on, I think, Facebook years later. 43:26.050 --> 43:28.611 [SPEAKER_01]: He just like got suggested to me in the front of him. 43:28.771 --> 43:29.971 [SPEAKER_00]: And he did exactly what my class. 43:30.511 --> 43:35.193 [SPEAKER_00]: Uh, you, uh, he sort of influenced her hand guides you to the truck. 43:35.773 --> 43:37.654 [SPEAKER_00]: You open the door. 43:37.794 --> 43:38.414 [SPEAKER_00]: You get in. 43:39.534 --> 43:41.094 [SPEAKER_00]: Is it is there a back seat? 43:41.214 --> 43:43.395 [SPEAKER_00]: Is it are you in the bed of the truck are we in? 43:43.815 --> 44:06.079 [SPEAKER_00]: Do you remember fully for the rest of the interview Had to sub-stack linked below where you will also find chats with Colin Braun rich burns Christopher Patterson Ross so Tyler Varval Sebastian Dino Cody silver Johnny Sibley Sam Alltizer and more It's at sub-stack.com slash at Eric Wills and I will see you there for a gorgeous Harry horny time. 44:06.099 --> 44:07.059 [SPEAKER_00]: I love you Bye