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[SPEAKER_00]: Welcome to the Way Community Church Podcast.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Our mission is to show people the way to life with Jesus.

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[SPEAKER_00]: My name is Darahal and I am the pastor of the Way Community Church.

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[SPEAKER_00]: If you would like to join us as a member or of you simply need prayer,

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[SPEAKER_00]: or if you want to worship through giving, you can find the links and the transcription of this podcast.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Today we're beginning our series as we study the emotionally healthy spirituality publication by Peter's Gazero and so we're going to talk about what it looks like to remain unhealthy, emotionally and immature spiritually.

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[SPEAKER_00]: It's all going to look at two biblical characters who have the same one issue and I hope is to gain some wisdom for why it's important.

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[SPEAKER_00]: for us to be courageous and stepping into God's healing so we can mature.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Let's study God's words together.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I want to start a new series today and light a mental health awareness mark entitled, Are You Ready to Heal?

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[SPEAKER_00]: Are You Ready?

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[SPEAKER_00]: to heal.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And I typically start a sermon with us reading a biblical passage, but today we will consider biblical passages throughout the context of the conversation.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So I want to start a new series.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Are you ready to heal?

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[SPEAKER_00]: I want you to ask yourself this question, right?

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[SPEAKER_00]: Many times in church will tell you, turn to your neighbor and ask your neighbor.

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[SPEAKER_00]: No, this

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[SPEAKER_00]: This is a, you, yourself and God conversation.

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[SPEAKER_00]: If you could put a mirror up in front of your face, look yourself square and not ask yourself, are you ready to heal?

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[SPEAKER_00]: This first message I want to entitle, the problem of remaining emotionally unhealthy.

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[SPEAKER_00]: The problem, not of being, but of remaining.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Emotionally unhealthy.

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[SPEAKER_00]: They are layers to our personality, and I share that here over the last few weeks that we're all complex individuals.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And while we may have priorities in order which we should and clear purpose in our life that we should follow, there's still other interests we may have that are harmless and could actually be helpful to the person we are evolving into or one day becoming.

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[SPEAKER_00]: to pastor and to shepherd people and understand that the office of pastor is not just preaching to people, is walking with people through the highs and lows of life and equipping them to do the same.

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[SPEAKER_00]: But beyond the office of pastor, I got desires and other interests in my life, things that I hope to do one day.

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[SPEAKER_00]: One of the things I hope to do, one of the

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[SPEAKER_00]: interest I have in my life both me and Ebony is that one day we want to become lying connoisseurs do with that what you will we want to become lying connoisseurs not a Somalia a Somalia is a person who is a professional they know about all the lines and they know how to serve it I don't want to serve it

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[SPEAKER_00]: I want to taste it and know what I'm tasting oh the complexity of the blackberry I'm used to chariars.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And that's something I hope to be just interested in it, enough to know what's going on as I enjoy it.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And we all, you know, dad and wine culture, whether you drink wine or not, it's not the issue.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We use phraseology that comes from wine culture.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Like when we tell somebody, they are aging, like fine wine.

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[SPEAKER_00]: All right, you know what you look at somebody, and you're like, hmm, the year you said you was born, don't match.

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[SPEAKER_00]: What I see, when I look at you, you are what church, age and like, fire and wine.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And oftentimes, we mean that as a real compliment, merely for the exterior presentation.

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[SPEAKER_00]: But the truth about the phrase, age and like, fire and wine has nothing to do with the outside and everything to do with the inside.

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[SPEAKER_00]: If you look at a wine bottle, you would notice on every

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[SPEAKER_00]: a year that is the vintage year of that line.

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[SPEAKER_00]: That may not necessarily mean that's the year it was bottled, but that's the year the grapes were harvested that were used to make that line.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And the idea is, if you get a good harvest, the longer that line stays in that bottle, the better that line gets.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Notice, the bottom never changes.

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[SPEAKER_00]: The bottom never improves in its outward appearance, but the longer that one stays in that bottom, the further it gets from his vintage date, the richer the taste of the line.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So when we tell somebody that you're aging like fine line and we mean it for the exterior only, we miss that the most beautiful parts of us should be internal.

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[SPEAKER_00]: The soul should grow in richness, the further you get from your vintage date.

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[SPEAKER_00]: What's your vintage date, Real?

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[SPEAKER_00]: Think about the year you were born.

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[SPEAKER_00]: That is your emotional vintage date.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Now, I want you to think about the year you received Jesus.

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[SPEAKER_00]: That is your spiritual vintage date.

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[SPEAKER_00]: The question is, are you emotionally more today than you were when you were born?

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[SPEAKER_00]: And are you spiritually more mature today than the day you were saved?

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[SPEAKER_00]: Are you age and like, fine, why?

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[SPEAKER_00]: Or does the year on the outside not reflected any growth is happening on the inside?

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[SPEAKER_00]: And instead of tasting like a rich one,

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[SPEAKER_00]: And now all with juicy juice, juicy juice has its place.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Juicy juice is the juicyest juice.

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[SPEAKER_00]: If you think about it, you got to be careful with some juicy juice because you're opening a bottle of juicy juice.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And you think it's going to last a week.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And you will drink a whole bottle of...

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[SPEAKER_00]: But here's a major key.

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[SPEAKER_00]: If you do not mature as you age, that's like putting juicy juice in an old iron bottle.

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[SPEAKER_00]: If what I expected to taste was richness, depth, maturity, wellness, but what I got was sugary, sweet, unfund-minted, undeveloped.

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[SPEAKER_00]: You know, maturity requires healing.

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[SPEAKER_00]: It's hard to grow up if you're not well.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So before we can have a conversation about growing up, which we will, we got to also have a conversation about being well, because in the area of your life where you choose to remain unwell, you also choose to remain immature.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So here's the question we're all asking ourselves today and for the next few weeks, and that is this, are you ready to heal?

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[SPEAKER_00]: Let the church say, ready.

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[SPEAKER_00]: ready is our annual thing for this year.

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[SPEAKER_00]: It is the one word that describes the prophetic rallying point for the way community church.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We want to ready ourselves for the things of God and I think verse 40 years first Peter chapter 3, verse number 15, where he says, but sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts always being ready.

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[SPEAKER_00]: to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you but with gentleness and respect.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Can you taste the richness of the wine and that verse?

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[SPEAKER_00]: He says, should anybody look at you and want to know how you got the emotional well that you have, the spiritual maturity that you have, the internal development that they see, should they want to taste and see that the Lord is good, you should be ready to serve them a reason for how you like God the way it is.

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[SPEAKER_00]: How did you become who you are becoming?

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[SPEAKER_00]: We know of you from, how did you grow to the person you, how can you handle pressure today that you couldn't handle back in the day?

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[SPEAKER_00]: Give me a reason for this hope in you.

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[SPEAKER_00]: What's the story behind the spark, behind the evolution and the maturity that we see?

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[SPEAKER_00]: And so our annual theme is ready.

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[SPEAKER_00]: That's our annual verse.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And you will be got to it for the whole year is this God develops readiness through repeated obedience.

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[SPEAKER_00]: What if I told you that emotional healing and spiritual maturity go hand in hand?

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[SPEAKER_00]: And that obedience is the key for both.

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[SPEAKER_00]: What if I told you that the areas in your life where you have yet to obey the Lord may be an indicator of where you're still immature or perhaps unwell?

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[SPEAKER_00]: Our overall maturity happens at the intersection between emotional health and contemplative spirituality.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I want you to hear this quote from Peter Scazero.

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[SPEAKER_00]: He's the author of emotionally healthy spirituality.

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[SPEAKER_00]: He says emotional health and spiritual maturity are inseparable.

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[SPEAKER_00]: It is not possible to be spiritually mature while remaining emotionally immature.

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[SPEAKER_00]: This is a quote from a study that we are about to start as a church.

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[SPEAKER_00]: It is an eight week study.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And this fall, August, or later this summer, in August, we're going to start life groups across our church, where we're all together to be studying emotionally healthy spirituality.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And the goal is for me to teach through half of the book in the month of May as we highlight mental health awareness more.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And then the other half of the book in the month of August, as we prepare for the life group.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And so, I can't think of a better day than Mother's Day where emotions are everywhere.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I can't think of a better month than mental health awareness more than to start this important conversation of our emotional well-being.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Here's some of the topics we're going to look at over the next few weeks at this study.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We're going to talk about stuff like know yourself that you may know God.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Going back in order to go forward.

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[SPEAKER_00]: journey through the wall.

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[SPEAKER_00]: If you feel like something is blocking you from becoming or getting the way you're supposed to be, that wall requires a journey.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We're going to talk about enlarging your soul through grief and loss.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Discovering the rhythms of the daily office and Sabbath, growing into an emotionally mature adult and ultimately developing a rule of life.

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[SPEAKER_00]: But before we can get it all, we don't start with the conversation today of the problem of remaining emotionally unhealthy in your spirituality.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Now we all face something that makes healing necessary, I want you to hear what I'm saying.

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[SPEAKER_00]: None of us go through this life on her.

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[SPEAKER_00]: That's not to minimize the pain you face, that's to normalize that pain is a part of life.

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[SPEAKER_00]: The issue is not if I have been hurt, even if it was against my choice.

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[SPEAKER_00]: The question is, am I willing now to have the courage to heal that is my choice?

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[SPEAKER_00]: I can choose my hurt, but I can choose my healing, say that with me.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I couldn't choose my hurt, but I can choose my healing.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So then staying emotionally unhealthy, staying spiritually immature is up to me.

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[SPEAKER_00]: That's a matter of the heart, a matter of the choice for me.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So here's what we'll do.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We each one of these weeks we're gonna look at biblical characters and what I'd like to try to do.

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[SPEAKER_00]: is if I'm going to look at a story in the Bible and it's going, you know, reflect the principal and there's a man at the center of the story.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I like to also find a woman who also has a similar principal in the Bible.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Because the Bible is full of man and women who walk with God.

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[SPEAKER_00]: The man may be the white keys on the keyboard, the women of the black keys on the keyboard, but they all dare.

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[SPEAKER_00]: All right.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So today I'm going to try to intertwine two stories

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[SPEAKER_00]: of two different people who both had the same issue.

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[SPEAKER_00]: One is a man, one is a woman.

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[SPEAKER_00]: They never met each other, but they both struggled with the same issue of being emotionally unwell and spiritually immature.

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[SPEAKER_00]: They lived this man in this woman, like people who don't know God.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Another thing that's interesting about them is they both said on the throne of Israel.

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[SPEAKER_00]: One was the king, the first king of Israel, his name is Saul.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Another was a queen, married to a king.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Her name was Jezebel.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So I'm going to try to tell their stories in a twine and notice patterns from them of what it looks like to not just be emotionally and spiritually unwell, but to stay there.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Because there's danger in staying there.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Now, to be honest, I don't know what happened in there upbringing, to shake them, to become who they were.

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[SPEAKER_00]: All we can do is meet them with a biblical story picks up.

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[SPEAKER_00]: What we noticed from them is that when they became Monarchial leaders, all the issues in their character calls him the harm everything and everybody they touched and the whole time they were unaware of it.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And so there's danger there.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And I believe the Lord wants to use these stories to get our attention to help us embrace the choice of healing.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Here's a major key.

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[SPEAKER_00]: You know that you're emotionally unhealthy when you reject key decisions that can help you heal and then mature.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We all have an opportunity to heal.

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[SPEAKER_00]: But sometimes we reject that opportunity.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We say, no, but we should say yes.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We all have an opportunity to mature, but sometimes we reject that opportunity.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We say no to the opportunity to mature.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We should have said yes.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So there are three things we say no to that we should have the courage to say yes to.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And as long as you say a no to these three things, it's going to keep you from healing and it's going to keep you from maturing.

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[SPEAKER_00]: But if you can get to a point when you say yes to these three things, not only will you heal, but you'll also mature.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Here they are.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Number one.

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[SPEAKER_00]: When we're unwell, we say no to reflection in self-awareness.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Number two, when we are unwell, we say no to cultivating our own personal relationship with God.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Number three, when we're unwell, we say no to being broken through setbacks and difficulties.

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[SPEAKER_00]: All right, let's go back to the first one.

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[SPEAKER_00]: When I'm unwell, when I'm immature, I say no to reflection and self-awareness.

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[SPEAKER_00]: In the stories of Saul and Jezebel, we see them do terrible things.

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[SPEAKER_00]: What we never see them do is pause to reflect, to recognize the terrible things they did.

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[SPEAKER_00]: There are people.

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[SPEAKER_00]: who harm us, but because they are so unwell, they can't even see, they cause and harm.

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[SPEAKER_00]: They don't even know how their action or inaction continues to pile upon our pain.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And while it's easy to notice that in other people, we don't want that to be true about ourselves.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Lord, make us so aware of our sales that I know how the things I say and do make people feel.

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[SPEAKER_00]: All right, but if I'm reflect, if I'm not self-aware, I'm doing a disservice to meet and everybody around me.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Look what happened with Saul.

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[SPEAKER_00]: When first came, excuse me, first time in the chapter 15, verse 10 through 16.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm going to just read some of the story and then I'll explain it as we go.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Let's jump in and verse number 10.

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[SPEAKER_00]: It says, then the word of the Lord came to Samuel, Samuel is a spiritual leader, a prophet, a seer.

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[SPEAKER_00]: This is God telling Samuel, verse 11, I regret that I may Saul came because he's turned back from following me and has not carried out my commands.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Samuel was furious, cried out to the Lord all night.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Samuel got up early in the morning to go meet Saul,

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[SPEAKER_00]: And it was reported to Samuel saying, Saul came to Carmelo and behold, he set up a monument for himself, then turned and proceeded to go down the Gilgile.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So Samuel came to Saul, listen to what Saul says when he sees the spiritual leader.

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[SPEAKER_00]: He says, blessed are you of the lower.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I have carried out the command of the lower.

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[SPEAKER_00]: But Samuel said, what then is the sound of the sheep I hear in my ears and the oxen that I hear?

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[SPEAKER_00]: Saul said, oh, they brought them from their mellocytes for the people, you know, they thought to keep the best of the sheep and oxen, you know, because we love God so much that we disobey him so we can give him an offering to make a sacrifice to the Lord.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Then Samuel said, stop.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Just let me tell you what the Lord said to me last night.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Saul said, speed.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Then Saul said to Samuel, I did obey the voice of the Lord.

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[SPEAKER_00]: If I went on the mission of the Lord told me, but I brought back the king, but the rest of the people I destroyed.

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[SPEAKER_00]: But they wanted me, it was the people who took the stuff that the Lord told us to destroy.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Because remember, we love God so much that we disobey him to give him an offer.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Sam, you're saying, it is better to obey than to second.

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[SPEAKER_00]: You ever had a mama who told you that obedience is better than second, like this, this was she got her from?

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[SPEAKER_00]: You ever had somebody tell you to obey as better than the second, like they say, they calling you song.

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[SPEAKER_00]: That's what they basically call it.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Here's what they tell you.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I don't need you be clever.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I don't need you to be fantastic.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I need you to obey simple instructions.

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[SPEAKER_00]: That's the sign of character.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Would you want to be clever or have character?

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[SPEAKER_00]: She was character.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Here's what's happening.

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[SPEAKER_00]: God tells Saul to go to the Amelikites completely destroyed them.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We can have a conversation about how you feel about the ethics about that later.

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[SPEAKER_00]: But God tells Saul to do this.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Saul gets there.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Have does the job.

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[SPEAKER_00]: He gets that heat thinking, whoa, hold on now.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, we're going to destroy him, but we're just going to get rid of the bad stuff.

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[SPEAKER_00]: The good stuff we're going to keep.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, then we're going to tell God, thank you by giving God an offer.

20:08.273 --> 20:14.981
[SPEAKER_00]: After he gets done half obeying the Lord, he builds a monument of himself to himself.

20:16.583 --> 20:20.568
[SPEAKER_00]: He's so proud of his own accomplishment that he said, you know what?

20:20.588 --> 20:22.510
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me go and then build me a statue.

20:24.329 --> 20:29.034
[SPEAKER_00]: He builds the statute in one city and then leaves it go to another one.

20:29.734 --> 20:31.496
[SPEAKER_00]: Now, the prophet is looking for him.

20:32.417 --> 20:36.021
[SPEAKER_00]: When he finally fives him, Samuel don't even say nothing.

20:36.381 --> 20:39.084
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul calms up and starts speaking to him in religious language.

20:39.484 --> 20:41.566
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, oh, bless the Lord.

20:43.228 --> 20:44.589
[SPEAKER_00]: Bless the Lord.

20:45.210 --> 20:46.030
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, Samuel.

20:48.693 --> 20:53.678
[SPEAKER_00]: Then, then, he tells a lie nobody asked him.

20:56.712 --> 20:59.135
[SPEAKER_00]: You know somebody unwell, but they offer you information.

20:59.375 --> 21:00.276
[SPEAKER_00]: You didn't ask.

21:03.580 --> 21:04.902
[SPEAKER_00]: I ain't asking you to lie to me.

21:06.123 --> 21:08.466
[SPEAKER_00]: You don't have to volunteer half information.

21:08.926 --> 21:10.969
[SPEAKER_00]: When I ain't even ask you if you obey the law.

21:11.810 --> 21:15.634
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul shows, send me your shows up in Saul, says, oh, hell that new year.

21:16.555 --> 21:17.216
[SPEAKER_00]: God bless you.

21:17.396 --> 21:19.198
[SPEAKER_00]: I did everything the Lord told me to do.

21:19.219 --> 21:20.180
[SPEAKER_00]: And I did it so good.

21:20.320 --> 21:23.504
[SPEAKER_00]: I decided to reward myself with a money you meant to myself.

21:23.844 --> 21:24.745
[SPEAKER_00]: You're welcome.

21:26.108 --> 21:27.130
[SPEAKER_00]: Send me a lot, hello, now.

21:27.711 --> 21:31.719
[SPEAKER_00]: If you got rid of all the animals, why are here animals?

21:31.739 --> 21:31.840
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

21:31.860 --> 21:32.160
[SPEAKER_00]: I hear him.

21:32.501 --> 21:34.565
[SPEAKER_00]: Even if he didn't hear him naturally, he heard him in the spirit.

21:35.627 --> 21:37.391
[SPEAKER_00]: He's trying to get Saul's attention.

21:37.631 --> 21:40.697
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul says, oh, we just kept the best by ourselves.

21:40.718 --> 21:42.561
[SPEAKER_00]: But now, me, it was really the people who did it.

21:43.924 --> 21:46.429
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, because we was going to give a offering to the Lord.

21:46.949 --> 22:00.333
[SPEAKER_00]: And what we notice in this moment is the danger of being immature and unwell, because even when accountability is staring you in the face, you can't see maturity if it's looking right back at you.

22:00.353 --> 22:09.149
[SPEAKER_00]: Sam means trying to help Saul see himself and the whole time Saul is doing the moon long.

22:09.169 --> 22:10.071
[SPEAKER_00]: Which you may read?

22:10.996 --> 22:17.464
[SPEAKER_00]: Emotional immaturity makes us blame and backpedal when we're being challenged to see our own missteps.

22:20.227 --> 22:25.913
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes the people who love you, love you so much, they just want to hold up a mirror so you can see you.

22:28.016 --> 22:38.488
[SPEAKER_00]: But the minute anybody tried to do that, and you start hitting with the matrix, you're going to move along out of this conversation.

22:39.008 --> 22:45.597
[SPEAKER_00]: Or are you going to blame others in that moment what you're displaying is emotional immaturity?

22:47.760 --> 22:49.843
[SPEAKER_00]: You ever had a friend that you really wanted to help?

22:50.263 --> 22:54.529
[SPEAKER_00]: They just did not want to be helped.

22:54.549 --> 23:02.620
[SPEAKER_00]: You ever had a sibling that you just, whoo, you just really wanted to get some advice to, but they weren't ready for.

23:04.355 --> 23:11.805
[SPEAKER_00]: You haven't had an adult parent, you're an adult child, and you've got a parent that now you like, do I have to parent my parent?

23:15.710 --> 23:17.593
[SPEAKER_00]: How can I help my parents see themselves?

23:18.694 --> 23:32.893
[SPEAKER_00]: And the minutes you start trying to flinch towards, helping them see them is the minute they start hearing you with the hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop, hop

23:34.207 --> 23:39.875
[SPEAKER_00]: You hit me with the B-box.

23:39.895 --> 23:45.182
[SPEAKER_00]: Was scary as Saul got all the way to becoming king before he ever healed and mature?

23:46.965 --> 23:50.309
[SPEAKER_00]: It's dangerous to get influence before you get healing.

23:51.811 --> 23:54.375
[SPEAKER_00]: But we live in the world as just telling us to get more influence.

23:55.132 --> 24:01.560
[SPEAKER_00]: get as many people to follow you as you can, get as many people to like you as you can, get as many people to consume your content as you can.

24:01.921 --> 24:06.086
[SPEAKER_00]: Never ask any of the questions and my even healed enough to be a content creator.

24:10.832 --> 24:11.793
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not joking, I'm not joking, I'm not joking.

24:11.813 --> 24:14.597
[SPEAKER_00]: And my even well enough to influence anybody to do anything.

24:14.637 --> 24:22.607
[SPEAKER_00]: This man has all the influence, all the power, none of the self-awareness, none of the reflection.

24:24.106 --> 24:30.672
[SPEAKER_00]: What we do when we're spiritually immature is when people ask us to be accountable, we say I'm not perfect.

24:32.814 --> 24:40.140
[SPEAKER_00]: The people who love you are not expecting you to be perfect, but they do expect you to be self-aware.

24:40.200 --> 24:41.301
[SPEAKER_00]: We all worship in the gutters.

24:41.322 --> 24:42.683
[SPEAKER_00]: Every generation is in the room.

24:43.343 --> 24:45.585
[SPEAKER_00]: All the teenagers, viewer middle school, high school.

24:46.226 --> 24:46.967
[SPEAKER_00]: I want you to hear me.

24:47.267 --> 24:49.529
[SPEAKER_00]: Your parents don't expect you to be perfect.

24:49.549 --> 24:50.189
[SPEAKER_00]: Ask me why.

24:50.590 --> 24:54.113
[SPEAKER_00]: Ask me.

24:58.413 --> 25:05.580
[SPEAKER_00]: I know what's in you, because I put it there.

25:07.922 --> 25:10.124
[SPEAKER_00]: Your pair is not asking you to be perfect.

25:11.906 --> 25:17.211
[SPEAKER_00]: And when you respond to parental accountability like, ah, but I'm not perfect.

25:17.371 --> 25:18.252
[SPEAKER_00]: I ask you to be perfect.

25:18.272 --> 25:18.933
[SPEAKER_00]: You're my child.

25:19.013 --> 25:19.854
[SPEAKER_00]: I know you're not perfect.

25:22.977 --> 25:24.538
[SPEAKER_00]: I am asking you to be accountable.

25:26.223 --> 25:30.588
[SPEAKER_00]: The people who love you just want you to see yourself.

25:31.649 --> 25:36.294
[SPEAKER_00]: So they don't have the burden of always having to show you you.

25:36.314 --> 25:39.137
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, I'm gonna say it this way.

25:40.259 --> 25:55.015
[SPEAKER_00]: You ever been talking to somebody who breast stank and it was so bad that it was like, Yeah, Casey.

25:57.509 --> 26:16.271
[SPEAKER_00]: It was so bad, you can taste there, you're like, and so then you start going through your mind, like, hmm, maybe they ate some, but you're like, no, that ain't it.

26:17.872 --> 26:20.175
[SPEAKER_00]: That ain't onion from a burger.

26:22.720 --> 26:28.248
[SPEAKER_00]: So then you gotta, you gotta, you gotta issue your arms, you like, how do I?

26:29.770 --> 26:36.240
[SPEAKER_00]: Lovely bring this to their attention without being offended that my eyes are watering while they are.

26:38.463 --> 26:49.099
[SPEAKER_00]: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

26:52.572 --> 26:55.915
[SPEAKER_00]: Hey, we all got to stop at the sink in the morning.

26:59.378 --> 27:02.802
[SPEAKER_00]: You got to sink, you got to mirror, stop there.

27:04.944 --> 27:05.965
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't rush past it.

27:06.845 --> 27:09.188
[SPEAKER_00]: You give yourself a gift and you give us a gift.

27:13.272 --> 27:20.098
[SPEAKER_00]: Design is true emotionally when you love somebody and it's just something that they just

27:21.850 --> 27:27.688
[SPEAKER_00]: refused to see, it's like, how do I help you help yourself?

27:28.831 --> 27:30.978
[SPEAKER_00]: Because when it's really love, it's not even about me.

27:31.218 --> 27:35.792
[SPEAKER_00]: It's about me not wanting you to be viewed in a way that you've been viewed.

27:37.628 --> 27:39.170
[SPEAKER_00]: Are you willing to be self-aware?

27:39.351 --> 27:40.312
[SPEAKER_00]: Y'all picking up what I'm putting down?

27:41.054 --> 27:43.197
[SPEAKER_00]: This one's just true for solid, was true for Jezebel II.

27:43.878 --> 28:01.847
[SPEAKER_00]: And later on, in the message we'll see here in a minute, how she had the same issue, because it's not just that people who are emotionally unwell say no to self-reflection and self-awareness, but then number two, people who are emotionally unwell also say no to cultivating their personal relationship with God.

28:02.519 --> 28:06.323
[SPEAKER_00]: The Bible flat out calls Jezebel, a worshiper of idols.

28:07.084 --> 28:08.725
[SPEAKER_00]: She worshiped a false God.

28:08.765 --> 28:18.415
[SPEAKER_00]: First King, 1631 says, as though it had been a trivial thing for him that is a half to walk in the sins of Jeroboam, he married who church Jezebel.

28:18.896 --> 28:24.582
[SPEAKER_00]: She's the daughter of Ethbel, King of the Sardonians who served who church bail and then what?

28:24.802 --> 28:27.344
[SPEAKER_00]: Why should?

28:27.364 --> 28:29.927
[SPEAKER_00]: She's the queen of Israel.

28:30.616 --> 28:38.944
[SPEAKER_00]: Which means, she has the opportunity to get to know the God of Israel, the maker of heaven and earth.

28:40.005 --> 28:50.895
[SPEAKER_00]: And instead of getting to know the God of the nation she is quaint over, she decides to continue to worship the false gods from the family of her origin.

28:51.776 --> 28:58.682
[SPEAKER_00]: And what it shows us is that when we're spiritually unhealthy, we can't discern the difference between the real God and false idols.

29:00.518 --> 29:07.705
[SPEAKER_00]: Because you go worship, the question is just, what you're going worship, who you go worship?

29:07.725 --> 29:14.612
[SPEAKER_00]: When you're spiritually unwell, spiritually immature, you don't worship, you'll just find an idol to replace the one true God.

29:15.814 --> 29:22.180
[SPEAKER_00]: Jezebel's idol was bailed, Saul's idol was Saul.

29:22.200 --> 29:29.007
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul was so caught up with Saul that Saul never developed the relationship we got.

29:29.948 --> 29:34.593
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul was one of those people who thought, because I know somebody who know God.

29:34.613 --> 29:40.819
[SPEAKER_00]: Then I know God too.

29:40.839 --> 29:41.901
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul knew Samuel.

29:42.922 --> 29:44.904
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul knew that Samuel knew God.

29:44.944 --> 29:47.887
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul knew that God spoke to Samuel.

29:48.588 --> 29:51.731
[SPEAKER_00]: So Saul always expected to hear from God through Samuel.

29:53.052 --> 29:55.635
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul never had a relationship with God.

29:56.105 --> 30:06.319
[SPEAKER_00]: Here's a major key, you can be closer somebody who is close to God and still be emotionally and spiritually immature yourself.

30:06.339 --> 30:12.227
[SPEAKER_00]: Just because you know somebody who know the Lord for real, you know the Lord for real.

30:12.247 --> 30:17.735
[SPEAKER_00]: And some of us love to live in that space so we can make an excuse to get away with the stuff we still like to do.

30:17.755 --> 30:19.497
[SPEAKER_00]: The person we still like to be.

30:20.422 --> 30:26.289
[SPEAKER_00]: When the truth is saying, no, to develop in my own relationship the Lord is putting me in a treacherous situation.

30:26.670 --> 30:35.420
[SPEAKER_00]: Because if the person underpinning on to keep me close to God is no longer in the picture, then the door between me and God feels like it's shut forever.

30:36.462 --> 30:37.523
[SPEAKER_00]: Look at first Samuel 15.

30:37.563 --> 30:40.387
[SPEAKER_00]: This is again, Saul Challenger, Samuel Challenger, Saul.

30:40.627 --> 30:44.792
[SPEAKER_00]: Samuel turned to go, Saul grabbed the edge of his road, and it tore off.

30:45.650 --> 30:50.596
[SPEAKER_00]: Samuel said, the same way you just tore my clothes, that's the same way God just tore this kingdom from you.

30:51.416 --> 30:53.999
[SPEAKER_00]: He's gonna give it to a neighbor who is better than you.

30:54.540 --> 30:55.261
[SPEAKER_00]: Who is that neighbor?

30:55.501 --> 30:55.861
[SPEAKER_00]: David.

30:57.643 --> 30:59.405
[SPEAKER_00]: The David have his own sins, yes.

31:00.046 --> 31:02.309
[SPEAKER_00]: But the David have his own relationship with the Lord, yes.

31:02.729 --> 31:06.654
[SPEAKER_00]: Because it's not perfection that is the issue.

31:07.815 --> 31:11.539
[SPEAKER_00]: It's intimacy that is the issue.

31:13.105 --> 31:20.194
[SPEAKER_00]: He says in verse 29, also the glory of Israel will not lie or change his mind for he is not a man and God don't change God's mind.

31:21.356 --> 31:23.919
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul said, okay, all right, I did wrong.

31:23.999 --> 31:26.783
[SPEAKER_00]: I said, but make me look good in front of everybody.

31:29.927 --> 31:38.758
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, all right, I assume you're saying that I did wrong and all of that, but my image in front of these people, I need you to help me uphold the image.

31:39.852 --> 31:46.659
[SPEAKER_00]: Because if you stand next to me, they'll believe that God is still happy with me.

31:46.679 --> 31:52.064
[SPEAKER_00]: The emotionally, spiritually immature rely too much on spiritual heroes to make them feel connected to God.

31:53.005 --> 31:54.727
[SPEAKER_00]: I need you to hear what I'm saying right here.

31:56.349 --> 32:02.915
[SPEAKER_00]: You do not need me for you to get a word from God.

32:06.239 --> 32:06.719
[SPEAKER_00]: Amen, Amen, Amen, Amen.

32:06.879 --> 32:07.460
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't eat, don't eat.

32:07.480 --> 32:09.522
[SPEAKER_00]: I only have nighting on it to put me there.

32:10.413 --> 32:16.619
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't need to do it, that's bad for you, and bad for me.

32:18.841 --> 32:21.524
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't make I am not your spiritual hero.

32:22.945 --> 32:27.450
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm your pastor, I'm the pastor of the way community church.

32:27.470 --> 32:32.775
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, as a resources on a way community church for the good of the mission, but I am not your spiritual hero.

32:32.815 --> 32:36.218
[SPEAKER_00]: If anything, I'm your guide for you to become the hero.

32:37.784 --> 32:38.765
[SPEAKER_00]: What do you say around?

32:39.246 --> 32:49.019
[SPEAKER_00]: If you need to get a prayer through to the Lord, don't think, man, I need to call a prayer to get a prayer through.

32:50.401 --> 32:55.968
[SPEAKER_00]: You need to just pray to the Father in Jesus' name.

32:55.988 --> 32:59.093
[SPEAKER_00]: If it starts after no need to like, oh, I need a word from the Lord.

32:59.313 --> 33:00.454
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me call Pastor Hall.

33:00.855 --> 33:01.716
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't do it.

33:04.666 --> 33:05.227
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't do it.

33:05.307 --> 33:09.193
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't do a lot on Thursday because I'm writing the sermon usually for Sunday.

33:11.137 --> 33:15.344
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not saying the Lord won't use me to speak into your life because I believe the Lord will and I hope the Lord does.

33:15.704 --> 33:17.768
[SPEAKER_00]: That's between me being faithful to the Lord.

33:17.788 --> 33:18.669
[SPEAKER_00]: You picking up what I'm putting down.

33:19.130 --> 33:20.232
[SPEAKER_00]: What I'm saying is don't come.

33:20.272 --> 33:25.881
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't become so codependent on this relationship that if you don't hear my voice, you can't hear God speak.

33:27.683 --> 33:29.666
[SPEAKER_00]: That is a sign of emotional immaturity.

33:29.967 --> 33:37.638
[SPEAKER_00]: If you need a spiritual hero to keep you connected to God, you missed what it means to have a relationship with God for you.

33:38.379 --> 33:42.786
[SPEAKER_00]: It was so bad for Saul that Samuel died.

33:44.609 --> 33:46.392
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul tried to talk to God.

33:46.412 --> 33:49.036
[SPEAKER_00]: God didn't want to have no no Saul.

33:49.657 --> 33:51.700
[SPEAKER_00]: He's like, no, don't try to talk to me now.

33:53.317 --> 34:05.049
[SPEAKER_00]: So Saul said, because God won't talk back to me, I'm gonna go get a witch, a medium who works with the dark arts to bring Samuel back from the dead.

34:05.109 --> 34:11.716
[SPEAKER_00]: Because I can't talk to the living God unless a dead man helps me.

34:15.840 --> 34:17.502
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, first Samuel chapter 28.

34:19.979 --> 34:34.014
[SPEAKER_00]: The Bible says in verse 3, now Samuel was dead and all Israel mourned him and buried him in his own city and Saul took all the mediums and witches and spirits out of the land.

34:35.756 --> 34:41.822
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul tried to talk to the guy, God said, I want to hear it now because you only talk to me when you try to avoid consequences and accountability.

34:42.243 --> 34:44.265
[SPEAKER_00]: You don't talk to me for intimacy.

34:46.760 --> 34:59.539
[SPEAKER_00]: So when Saul realized, God went having it, Saul goes to a medium, a spirit is in the skies as himself, so he don't look like the king.

35:01.562 --> 35:14.742
[SPEAKER_00]: And he goes into the spirit as and verse number eight says, Saul descends himself by putting on different clothes, went in, him with two men, and they came to the woman by night, and he said, consult the spirit for me.

35:15.565 --> 35:20.170
[SPEAKER_00]: and bring up for me the one whom I shall name for you."

35:20.190 --> 35:21.332
[SPEAKER_00]: So she says, "'Who?'

35:21.692 --> 35:24.656
[SPEAKER_00]: Verse 11, "'Who shall I bring up?'

35:24.676 --> 35:28.861
[SPEAKER_00]: Saul said, "'Bring up Samuel for me.'"

35:28.881 --> 35:34.307
[SPEAKER_00]: When the woman saw Samuel, she did what church cried out with a loud, what just happened.

35:35.248 --> 35:43.378
[SPEAKER_00]: This man is so dependent on his spiritual hero, that he can't hear from the living God without a dead man talking to God for him.

35:44.320 --> 35:50.449
[SPEAKER_00]: He goes to Dark Arts and Witchcraft to conjure up a spirit.

35:51.470 --> 35:55.155
[SPEAKER_00]: The woman sees him and says, all right, I mean, I'll do it.

35:55.956 --> 36:04.889
[SPEAKER_00]: When the real Samuel shows up, the spirit is so overwhelmed because she was just going to lie to him and tell them that she saw whoever it was.

36:10.116 --> 36:12.319
[SPEAKER_00]: She was in the darkness, but like showed up.

36:13.244 --> 36:14.525
[SPEAKER_00]: and the witch got scared.

36:16.107 --> 36:16.927
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me pause right here.

36:16.947 --> 36:21.692
[SPEAKER_00]: I know we in the time, where witches are coming back in the vole and darkness is all over the place.

36:21.772 --> 36:25.535
[SPEAKER_00]: And you're walking a book story, and you'll see weegee bullets, and all this crazy.

36:25.996 --> 36:30.740
[SPEAKER_00]: If you got the spirit of the living God, and you, you have no need to fear those who play in darkness.

36:31.461 --> 36:34.944
[SPEAKER_00]: I promise you that.

36:34.964 --> 36:36.926
[SPEAKER_00]: I promise you that.

36:36.946 --> 36:37.046
[SPEAKER_00]: Amen.

36:37.066 --> 36:39.348
[SPEAKER_00]: Because you know what?

36:39.368 --> 36:40.669
[SPEAKER_00]: Roach is like to do.

36:42.488 --> 36:47.256
[SPEAKER_00]: As soon as the light came on, it's bigger than us.

36:47.276 --> 36:57.172
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I said, the real Samuel shows up and the witch is scared.

36:59.656 --> 37:03.001
[SPEAKER_00]: But Saul's problem was, he needed a dead man to talk to the living guy.

37:03.021 --> 37:06.707
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, it's some churches right now who pastors died 10 years ago.

37:08.881 --> 37:12.906
[SPEAKER_00]: And they still talk about pastor like he coming back or she coming back Sunday to preach.

37:14.908 --> 37:16.631
[SPEAKER_00]: We call it pastoring from the grave.

37:18.673 --> 37:27.464
[SPEAKER_00]: His church is right now who made spiritual heroes of their pastors and they can't move on, pass a leader who died a decade ago.

37:30.107 --> 37:34.112
[SPEAKER_00]: Because they become too cold dependent on the spiritual hero to hear from the living God.

37:35.375 --> 37:41.224
[SPEAKER_00]: Here's a major key, only talking to God when you're in trouble does not develop a deep intimate relationship with the Lord.

37:41.824 --> 37:43.207
[SPEAKER_00]: Here's a third thing that I'm gonna let you go.

37:43.807 --> 37:47.954
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, we're unwell, we say no to reflection and self-awareness.

37:48.214 --> 37:50.577
[SPEAKER_00]: We say no to cultivate in a personal relationship with God.

37:50.858 --> 37:54.383
[SPEAKER_00]: And number three, we say no to being broken through sex and difficulties.

37:55.885 --> 37:57.808
[SPEAKER_00]: This is really the sign of maturity.

37:59.731 --> 38:01.213
[SPEAKER_00]: The immature,

38:02.847 --> 38:06.190
[SPEAKER_00]: are sad about stuff they should have joy in.

38:06.230 --> 38:18.982
[SPEAKER_00]: The mature have joy in stuff that it seems like they should be sad in.

38:19.002 --> 38:30.492
[SPEAKER_00]: The immature are sad in stuff they should have joy in, but the mature are joyful in stuff that it seems like they should be sad.

38:33.509 --> 38:40.958
[SPEAKER_00]: because the mature have learned the mystery that difficulties and setback is where God works best.

38:44.062 --> 38:55.636
[SPEAKER_00]: The immature don't like no pain, so they run from it and they're running from it, they cause it.

38:55.656 --> 39:01.423
[SPEAKER_00]: Soon as the immature get a little setback, ego jerks in to protect them from looking like a loser.

39:02.602 --> 39:09.751
[SPEAKER_00]: And then we realize that the ego jumping in is going to keep you from really becoming who you should have been.

39:09.771 --> 39:15.618
[SPEAKER_00]: The mature is not that, the mature people are sadistic, mature people are just saddled.

39:17.360 --> 39:21.205
[SPEAKER_00]: The mature people know this is going to hurt, but the glory coming after.

39:25.691 --> 39:30.837
[SPEAKER_00]: So if you run from every set back in every difficulty, you're not running from paying you running from you.

39:33.415 --> 39:35.317
[SPEAKER_00]: and guess who going to be there when you start running?

39:40.503 --> 39:43.907
[SPEAKER_00]: So, when Samuel hits him, he confronts Saul about his ego.

39:44.447 --> 39:46.069
[SPEAKER_00]: He tells Saul now, you do it wrong.

39:46.469 --> 39:47.270
[SPEAKER_00]: It's all right now.

39:47.290 --> 39:48.071
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I do it right.

39:48.131 --> 39:49.553
[SPEAKER_00]: I even do the statute to myself.

39:50.174 --> 39:53.357
[SPEAKER_00]: Remember, I disobeyed God to give God an offering.

39:53.758 --> 39:55.980
[SPEAKER_00]: I told God, no to tell God you're welcome.

39:59.723 --> 40:04.209
[SPEAKER_00]: Sam is like, God will need you to be fantastic.

40:04.229 --> 40:05.391
[SPEAKER_00]: God need you to be faithful.

40:06.913 --> 40:13.442
[SPEAKER_00]: Every time he tried to show him himself, he used God to talk to a void Jesus' cross.

40:16.105 --> 40:19.770
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm gonna tell you all the truth and toughest principle about being a Christian.

40:20.491 --> 40:21.833
[SPEAKER_00]: At least in my opinion.

40:23.112 --> 40:32.709
[SPEAKER_00]: The truth and toughest principle about being a Christian is, when I become a Christian, I don't just say yes to Jesus' cross, I also so yes to mine.

40:35.334 --> 40:40.503
[SPEAKER_00]: If you'd think Christianity is, Jesus took it all, all the pain, so I can get all the gain.

40:44.070 --> 40:47.095
[SPEAKER_00]: That's not what Christian, Christianity is.

40:47.210 --> 41:00.501
[SPEAKER_00]: Jesus, example of allowing God to break him and the glory it produced encourages me to also let the Lord break me.

41:04.085 --> 41:05.346
[SPEAKER_00]: From the glory that's going to come from.

41:06.367 --> 41:10.730
[SPEAKER_00]: Christianity ain't, I do all wrong, and he paid all off, and I just keep doing all wrong.

41:12.492 --> 41:16.255
[SPEAKER_00]: Christianity used God, I trust you so much.

41:18.091 --> 41:19.492
[SPEAKER_00]: They yet know he's slay me.

41:22.035 --> 41:22.576
[SPEAKER_00]: I'll trust him.

41:24.358 --> 41:31.205
[SPEAKER_00]: Christianity is, you can give me what you told me you was gonna give me and then take it from me and I won't stop trusting.

41:35.730 --> 41:35.830
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

41:35.850 --> 41:35.950
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

41:35.970 --> 41:36.070
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

41:36.090 --> 41:37.432
[SPEAKER_00]: Jesus was innocent.

41:37.552 --> 41:38.693
[SPEAKER_00]: He didn't deserve the die.

41:39.274 --> 41:47.102
[SPEAKER_00]: And he still said, nevertheless, not mine, show what we don't.

41:50.272 --> 41:55.197
[SPEAKER_00]: Christianity is embracing the mystery that Jesus ain't the only one who had to die for this.

41:56.058 --> 41:59.642
[SPEAKER_00]: I got to die to him.

41:59.662 --> 42:03.386
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, I was an important, that's important because paying will show you who you not yet.

42:06.009 --> 42:12.435
[SPEAKER_00]: You will thank you, somebody, and paying to be like, I'm gonna give you an example, y'all.

42:12.656 --> 42:13.557
[SPEAKER_00]: I thought I was a big boy.

42:13.597 --> 42:14.618
[SPEAKER_00]: You couldn't have told me I wasn't.

42:15.979 --> 42:17.781
[SPEAKER_00]: I was 33 years old.

42:18.976 --> 42:25.824
[SPEAKER_00]: Marry the ill, three kids, just earn my doctorate degree, and preach a half my life, all my adult life.

42:25.844 --> 42:26.505
[SPEAKER_00]: I love the Lord.

42:26.765 --> 42:29.308
[SPEAKER_00]: You couldn't have told me I wouldn't have a big boy.

42:31.650 --> 42:42.823
[SPEAKER_00]: Then the pandemic covered up, my personal struggle when God let pain come in my life to show me a son, don't let that degree on the wall fool you.

42:45.908 --> 42:49.536
[SPEAKER_00]: You got some learning, you ain't, you ain't got no wisdom yet.

42:52.662 --> 42:54.165
[SPEAKER_00]: I folded it in the pandemic.

42:57.171 --> 43:06.651
[SPEAKER_00]: And I was so caught up in ego and mad that God would let me have control in my life because I thought I earned control by obeying myself to get more stock in control.

43:09.145 --> 43:10.547
[SPEAKER_00]: And I got to a point when I was like, you know what?

43:10.587 --> 43:10.968
[SPEAKER_00]: Forget it.

43:11.068 --> 43:12.049
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm gonna put in a resume.

43:12.650 --> 43:15.174
[SPEAKER_00]: I got a good degree from a good school.

43:15.294 --> 43:16.395
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm good at my job.

43:16.916 --> 43:17.917
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm gonna go somewhere else.

43:19.359 --> 43:20.401
[SPEAKER_00]: The law was like, no, you're not.

43:22.163 --> 43:22.324
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not.

43:22.344 --> 43:22.504
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not.

43:22.524 --> 43:23.385
[SPEAKER_00]: Am I telling the truth, Ebony?

43:26.990 --> 43:28.993
[SPEAKER_00]: Am I telling the truth, Will, Stan?

43:31.218 --> 43:35.984
[SPEAKER_00]: and had our love when the sat back proved that I wasn't who the degree sat our was.

43:36.304 --> 43:39.027
[SPEAKER_00]: I wouldn't be in the glory of the wake community church right now.

43:48.859 --> 43:49.139
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

43:49.400 --> 43:49.940
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

43:50.140 --> 43:50.301
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

43:56.848 --> 43:56.949
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.

43:56.969 --> 43:57.069
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.

43:57.089 --> 43:57.189
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.

43:57.209 --> 43:57.309
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.

43:57.329 --> 43:57.429
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.

43:57.449 --> 43:57.549
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.

43:57.569 --> 43:57.669
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.

43:57.689 --> 43:57.790
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.

43:57.810 --> 43:57.910
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.

43:57.930 --> 43:58.030
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.

43:58.050 --> 43:58.550
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

43:58.570 --> 43:58.671
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

43:58.711 --> 43:58.891
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

43:58.951 --> 43:59.051
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

43:59.071 --> 43:59.211
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

43:59.231 --> 43:59.331
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

43:59.351 --> 43:59.772
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

43:59.792 --> 43:59.892
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.

44:01.087 --> 44:02.549
[SPEAKER_00]: He not going to break you against your will.

44:02.850 --> 44:04.612
[SPEAKER_00]: He will only break you when you agree.

44:09.660 --> 44:24.422
[SPEAKER_00]: If you let ego keep jumping up, to save you from breaking, you will never outgrow where you are spiritually right now.

44:24.442 --> 44:24.642
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you.

44:24.662 --> 44:28.748
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, we thought of ego because if we think you're saving us, we're really ego is trapping us.

44:31.073 --> 44:37.262
[SPEAKER_00]: It's trapping us, and who we are, making us never able to become who God intended us to be.

44:39.365 --> 44:42.550
[SPEAKER_00]: The setback in the difficulty, don't mean figure out a way to get your way.

44:44.153 --> 44:46.636
[SPEAKER_00]: It means figure out a way to let God have God's way.

44:48.179 --> 44:53.707
[SPEAKER_00]: Here's the major key, the emotionally and spiritually immature used God talk to avoid Jesus' cross.

44:56.511 --> 44:58.414
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, I'm blessing the Holy Favourite, okay?

45:00.419 --> 45:02.581
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me know when you submitted and surrendered.

45:04.904 --> 45:05.885
[SPEAKER_00]: Then you got power.

45:07.887 --> 45:09.029
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, I'm God's favorite.

45:09.229 --> 45:09.509
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay.

45:11.351 --> 45:15.616
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me know when it's my God, my God, why have you forsaken me?

45:15.916 --> 45:19.580
[SPEAKER_00]: Then you got some real power.

45:19.601 --> 45:20.482
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, I love the Lord.

45:20.502 --> 45:21.423
[SPEAKER_00]: He heard my cry.

45:21.443 --> 45:21.803
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay.

45:22.884 --> 45:24.286
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me hear you cry out.

45:25.988 --> 45:27.890
[SPEAKER_00]: From a cross you refuse to get down from.

45:28.751 --> 45:29.852
[SPEAKER_00]: Then we can talk.

45:30.963 --> 45:43.987
[SPEAKER_00]: And unless and until you get there, you will never be telling it enough, skilled enough, attractive enough, educated enough, connected enough, to actually become something worth something.

45:46.411 --> 45:47.473
[SPEAKER_00]: Hear me what I say.

45:50.378 --> 45:52.903
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't use religious talk to avoid accountability.

45:56.815 --> 46:02.462
[SPEAKER_00]: Here's another major key, the emotionally spiritual immature interpret every setback or difficulty as a bruised at our ego.

46:04.004 --> 46:12.774
[SPEAKER_00]: What happens to the immature is when you lose, you're so caught up in your image that you think losing makes you a loser.

46:15.477 --> 46:17.440
[SPEAKER_00]: So you react to keep the winning image.

46:21.044 --> 46:23.667
[SPEAKER_00]: Jensibel's husband won a land that didn't belong to him.

46:24.862 --> 46:29.549
[SPEAKER_00]: based upon the way the land was subdivided in Cayenne, it belonged to another family.

46:31.191 --> 46:33.094
[SPEAKER_00]: He was king, but God was God.

46:34.075 --> 46:35.978
[SPEAKER_00]: Jesse Bell came in and was like, why you say it?

46:35.998 --> 46:37.680
[SPEAKER_00]: He said, I'm sorry because I can't have something I want.

46:39.042 --> 46:40.083
[SPEAKER_00]: She said, don't worry about it.

46:40.424 --> 46:41.265
[SPEAKER_00]: I'll get it for you.

46:42.346 --> 46:53.502
[SPEAKER_00]: And what the spiritually immature and what the wicked do is instead of taking an L when God draws a boundary, they will break God's law because they feel entitled to whatever they want.

46:54.460 --> 47:04.495
[SPEAKER_00]: So, Jezebel sets up a dynamic, gets this man killed, steals this man's land, because Ego was too involved for her husband to take a L in public for something he wanted.

47:06.678 --> 47:09.342
[SPEAKER_00]: What you saying around, I'm saying, you're not gonna get everything you want.

47:09.383 --> 47:20.940
[SPEAKER_00]: If you can't be told, no, without folding, you are not yet healed on mature.

47:23.502 --> 47:29.410
[SPEAKER_00]: If somebody can't tell you, no, what happens when a child gets told, no, for something they want, they throw up.

47:34.397 --> 47:41.887
[SPEAKER_00]: The date on your wine bottle, say, 1986, all right?

47:43.570 --> 47:49.037
[SPEAKER_00]: I got saved in 1992, but if somebody tell me, no, and I throw a tantrum, juicy juice.

47:53.168 --> 47:55.691
[SPEAKER_00]: So you think you just supposed to get everything you want in this world?

47:57.153 --> 48:06.725
[SPEAKER_00]: Then you become a psycho maniac who would do whatever you can to break God's law, because your ego is too fragile because you thought a loss made you a loser.

48:06.946 --> 48:09.849
[SPEAKER_00]: The matured, no, I'm still a winner, even when I'm losing.

48:12.573 --> 48:12.933
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

48:12.953 --> 48:14.295
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm a winner because he said I'm a winner.

48:14.315 --> 48:17.639
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

48:17.659 --> 48:22.045
[SPEAKER_00]: So I can take this L, because this L is set me up for a bigger W.

48:24.927 --> 48:26.188
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm dying, y'all, here's the question.

48:28.370 --> 48:36.558
[SPEAKER_00]: What would it take to mature enough where you embrace the brokenness your difficulties cause?

48:39.701 --> 48:40.602
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, what is it going to take?

48:41.223 --> 48:46.048
[SPEAKER_00]: Each one of us, we got different issues.

48:46.068 --> 48:47.009
[SPEAKER_00]: What is it going to take for you?

48:48.250 --> 48:53.635
[SPEAKER_00]: To say, I'm gonna let this difficulty completely break me.

48:57.597 --> 49:01.122
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to let it happen.

49:01.142 --> 49:08.311
[SPEAKER_00]: Not because I like it, not because it's fair, not because it's just, but because it's a mystery.

49:13.217 --> 49:18.585
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm a lady break me.

49:18.605 --> 49:26.575
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to confess, I'm at the end of myself, and I'm not going to be embarrassed that I didn't have what it takes to get through this.

49:28.428 --> 49:30.009
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not going to care what people think about me.

49:33.553 --> 49:34.353
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm just accepted.

49:37.756 --> 49:39.498
[SPEAKER_00]: What is this trying to teach me about me?

49:46.805 --> 49:49.247
[SPEAKER_00]: Your heart was not your choice, but your healing is.

49:51.569 --> 49:55.533
[SPEAKER_00]: So here's what I want to do if you courage us enough.

49:55.553 --> 49:57.034
[SPEAKER_00]: Take your hand, put it on your heart.

50:00.187 --> 50:01.109
[SPEAKER_00]: You can stand to your feet.

50:01.129 --> 50:04.815
[SPEAKER_00]: We're planning to be dismissing him and put it on your heart.

50:04.835 --> 50:05.416
[SPEAKER_00]: You feel that?

50:09.262 --> 50:10.023
[SPEAKER_00]: What is that in there?

50:10.244 --> 50:10.664
[SPEAKER_00]: What is that?

50:15.452 --> 50:18.016
[SPEAKER_00]: You know what I'm talking about.

50:18.036 --> 50:20.200
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm talking about that part of the iceberg.

50:20.280 --> 50:21.081
[SPEAKER_00]: Nobody can see.

50:22.724 --> 50:25.148
[SPEAKER_00]: You age a like five on on the outside.

50:27.862 --> 50:33.428
[SPEAKER_00]: You might have to move some stuff around and get the religion out of the way.

50:33.448 --> 50:34.289
[SPEAKER_00]: Get past ego.

50:38.012 --> 50:42.277
[SPEAKER_00]: What's that scary place in there that you've been running from?

50:42.297 --> 50:47.002
[SPEAKER_00]: It's set back to spend trying to put it in your face.

50:47.022 --> 50:57.092
[SPEAKER_00]: Are you ready to be healed there?

50:58.861 --> 51:06.932
[SPEAKER_00]: We lay hands on ourselves because we want to be in touch with the places of pain we've been trying to avoid.

51:08.735 --> 51:20.691
[SPEAKER_00]: Forgive us for remaining emotionally unwell when you have been given us the opportunity to respond to your invitation to heal and mature.

51:23.094 --> 51:25.898
[SPEAKER_00]: Forgive us for being mad about stuff we should be glad about.

51:26.907 --> 51:28.549
[SPEAKER_00]: Forgive us for complaining about stuff.

51:28.569 --> 51:30.592
[SPEAKER_00]: We should be thankful for it.

51:30.612 --> 51:33.517
[SPEAKER_00]: Forgive us for avoiding people because they hold us accountable.

51:35.139 --> 51:38.844
[SPEAKER_00]: Forgive us for always being on the move so we don't have to sit down and be.

51:41.008 --> 51:46.836
[SPEAKER_00]: Forgive us for trying to use our size success to give the image of age and like far more.

51:46.896 --> 51:47.958
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm really on the inside.

51:48.338 --> 51:49.800
[SPEAKER_00]: Our souls lack richness.

51:52.765 --> 51:55.108
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you for loving us in spite of all of that.

51:56.675 --> 52:00.482
[SPEAKER_00]: Help us today to take a courageous step towards our healing.

52:01.570 --> 52:02.517
[SPEAKER_00]: In Jesus' name.

