WEBVTT

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[SPEAKER_00]: Hey, I'm Aaron, and I'm Jennifer.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And we're the host of the Marge of the God podcast.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Our desire is to help you cultivate a marriage that chances boldly after God's will for your life together.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We want to invite you to subscribe to our show wherever you watch or listen.

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[SPEAKER_01]: We are so glad you're here and we pray that our discussion truly blesses you and your marriage.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Welcome to the Marge of the God podcast.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Welcome back to another episode of the marriage after God podcast.

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[SPEAKER_01]: We are on week 25 of our 30 week marriage devotional series.

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[SPEAKER_01]: We are almost done.

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[SPEAKER_01]: We have a five episodes left.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It's awesome.

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[SPEAKER_01]: This one is going to be on God's order in our marriage as we mentioned last episode and the fruitfulness that comes from it.

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[SPEAKER_01]: But before we get into the topic, we want to always invite you to like, you know, everything tap that hit that like button, subscribe to our show.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Also, if you know someone that would be blessed by this podcast, by the series, if this podcast is blessed you in any way, would you please just copy that share link and just send it in a text message to a friend, share it on social media, let everyone know about this show.

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[SPEAKER_01]: We'd love to get more people listening.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And so, lastly, before we get into the topic, this, this series we're doing is based on our, has been a wife after God devotionals.

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[SPEAKER_01]: They're 38 devotionals, one's called Husband After God, one's called wife after God, you can get them at shop.

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[SPEAKER_01]: MarriageafterGod.com.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And we just encourage people to get these devotionals because not only does this support our show, it blesses your marriage.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It also gives you more to work on, more to do as a couple at home outside of this show.

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[SPEAKER_01]: You don't need them to listen to this series at all, but definitely enhances the experience.

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[SPEAKER_01]: So.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Awesome, great job on the intro.

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[SPEAKER_00]: It's a lot of information, okay, so today's topic we're gonna be jumping into order and you know, God is all about order and he's the one that designed marriage and so we're gonna be talking about order and marriage and creation and everything that he's put his hand to and then like you said, the fruitfulness that comes from that.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So without order,

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[SPEAKER_00]: life would be chaos when it's true and when we feel that our home sometimes with the drought of order it's chaotic there's order everywhere we look one of the most important and powerful evidence is for a creator is the fact that everything has order and designed to it like that intelligent design you know

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[SPEAKER_01]: it's pretty incredible.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And you see it everywhere.

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[SPEAKER_01]: God is a God of order.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And his order for things.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And we always go back to the word of God.

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[SPEAKER_01]: We always go back to like, what does God want?

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[SPEAKER_01]: Because we can give you our opinions all day long.

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[SPEAKER_01]: But in reality, his order, his design, his purpose, they're the best things for us.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I love that you said his order for things and included design and purpose, because we see order in design like when you look at a cell, like just think about biology and how our bodies are made up of a bunch of cells, but just take the one

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[SPEAKER_00]: And how it needs to, in order to function, there's design to it and there's there's a purpose behind every part of it, which is really cool, and and like I said, then that one cell in conjunction with a bunch of other cells together work up to make a person or an animal or a plant, I don't know, I just think that that's really cool.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It's kind of tied into what we were talking about last week, that unity, like you need, you can't, you need all of them working together to properly function as a body, but I just wanted to bring up something really cool in that you brought up cells, something that I saw recently about the cell, and about how powerful of a proof it is for the Creator God.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And so you look at the parts of a cell, which I only have some of them, like we might know mitochondria and nucleus,

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[SPEAKER_01]: ribosomes.

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[SPEAKER_01]: So you look at these different parts of a cell.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And each part relies on another part within the cell.

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[SPEAKER_01]: So a nucleus relies on the ribosomes.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Might a country depends on the nucleus.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Ribosomes requires mRNA to create protein, each piece.

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[SPEAKER_01]: of the cell.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Every single one of them needs someone else.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Need something else within the cell.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And what was really cool about this is said that the likelihood the odds and I got this off seek find on that.

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[SPEAKER_01]: The odds of all the parts of the cell involving simultaneously because you can't have one without the other.

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[SPEAKER_01]: So they have to exist at the same time for them to function is one in 10 to the 40,000

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[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, what is that term goal?

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[SPEAKER_01]: 10 to the 40,000 power.

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[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

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[SPEAKER_01]: That's just in lot.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It literally says it's suggests that it's virtually impossible for this to happen.

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[SPEAKER_01]: If you're just the cell, that's not even including the other parts that it needs.

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[SPEAKER_01]: They all had to exist at the exact same time, so they could function as a cell.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And they all couldn't be doing the same function, right?

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[SPEAKER_00]: They all had to do.

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[SPEAKER_00]: They're part in it and this is where, you know, God's order really comes into play because he's the one that created all of these things, and in order for it to work properly and be managed well, everybody has to participate, every aspect of it.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So we see we see God's order all the way down to the smallest of things in life, but then I was also thinking there's also order in purpose and in doing and you know how I think of like a certain

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[SPEAKER_00]: a certain position holds a role that helps every aspect of that team or that workplace or the home function well, you know like one team captain because if we were all team captains there would be chaos we talked about that before I think again in the unity section but it's just interesting to me I think yeah there's just different ways that God's order plays out throughout life

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[SPEAKER_01]: I think, you know, as you talk about order and how beautiful it is and how it's got a purpose to it, I think often when we find ourselves in chaos or disorder, often it's coming from a place of like a sinful fleshly like I want my way or I don't want to do it that way because I want to do it my way.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And then it causes disarray, disorder.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I wonder if you guys listening have felt this, but when my life is like that, oftentimes there's a lack of peace too.

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[SPEAKER_00]: There's a lack of peace when you're trying to, you know, operate in that flash or my way is better way of thinking when God's over here saying, actually I just want you to follow my word, I want you to follow me, and I'll show you the way.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And so we want to continue on this topic of order.

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[SPEAKER_01]: God has given us order everywhere.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Like we were just talking about creation, and we're going to talk about that in a second more, but he's given it to us in institutions in the way we operate in the societies, in the way we operate, in our marriages.

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[SPEAKER_01]: He gives us, he gives us order in the church.

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[SPEAKER_01]: When we gather as the people of God, we're supposed to operate a certain way.

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[SPEAKER_01]: We've had many episodes in the past on this topic of how church operates and home church and all these different things.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Um, the Bible tells us in the first Corinthians 14 and 40 says, but all things should be done decently and in order in talking specifically about, you know, when you come together and one's got this, one's got that and one's doing that, to not just all due to the same time, to like take turns and then to not, not all not everyone does the same thing that we actually have our different roles and our different gifts and our different abilities.

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[SPEAKER_01]: But he wants to then decently in an order and the purpose of all of that is not just that we have this nice and tidy church gathering.

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[SPEAKER_00]: it's because it doesn't work any other way.

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[SPEAKER_01]: That's true, but it's also because the purpose is that we are uplifting each other, that there's a there's a goal in my there's something happening when we come together as a church.

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[SPEAKER_01]: When he created the heavens and the earth, he made it in order.

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[SPEAKER_01]: We have this whole account in first and second genesis one and two of the order like on day one on day two on day three.

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[SPEAKER_01]: This is for by him, this for the Colossians 1, 16 through 17, this is for by him, all things were created in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities, all things were created through him and for him, and he is before all things, and in him all things hold together.

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[SPEAKER_01]: and therefore they're in him and for him and held together by him.

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[SPEAKER_01]: So these are his things.

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[SPEAKER_01]: What's awesome is the entire creation account that God gives us is him bringing order out of chaos.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Formlessness from the Void to solid, to something in order.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Light separated from darkness.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Waters separated from land.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Each living thing according to it's kind.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And then he looked at all of it, and he said, what?

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[SPEAKER_00]: That is good.

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[SPEAKER_01]: That's very good.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Even after, like, after he makes man, so God, he brought order into chaos and then declared good.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And I think that's our heart for this episode, is that we would desire the order that God wants because it's good.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and that it matters to him, right, but that it should matter to us.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We should care about his order and how he lays it out for us throughout his word of how we should operate.

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[SPEAKER_00]: What our functions are, you know, and surrendering to his truth.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I think it's easy to say like, oh, I, I love what God loves, or I want what God wants.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Of course I do, but then there's times that it's like hard to obey.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It's hard to honor that when we see how he's done, you know, set things up.

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[SPEAKER_01]: When you read Isaiah 55, 8th or 11th.

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[SPEAKER_00]: For my thoughts are not your thoughts.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Neither are your ways my ways to clears the Lord.

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[SPEAKER_00]: For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

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[SPEAKER_01]: So as you were just saying that God's ways are better than ours, and

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[SPEAKER_01]: It shows right here.

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[SPEAKER_01]: He's talking about how he's like, my thoughts, my ways, my purposes, they're above yours.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And this is essentially talking about like, like, how I keep going back to, like, often as people, we think our ways better.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Like, actually, I know a better way God.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Let's, I want to, I want to set up my marriage like this.

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[SPEAKER_01]: I want to do my life like this.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And God's saying to us, he's like, actually, like, I want you to trust my way because it's better.

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[SPEAKER_01]: I know better.

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[SPEAKER_01]: I understand how I set things up.

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[SPEAKER_01]: I understand how I made you.

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[SPEAKER_01]: I understand how I made the world.

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[SPEAKER_01]: He knows what he's looking for

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[SPEAKER_00]: I'm just thinking about couples listening right now and maybe they don't feel like they have those types of conversations with God, where you're telling God, like, you know, it's been that, yeah.

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[SPEAKER_00]: But in the way that we act and operate, like within marriage, like, maybe that conversation does look like that toward a spouse, or, you know, like, to speak to that a little bit.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Well, I'll give it, like, I love what you're saying, like, it's not like we're saying to God.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, I just, I want to do it differently, but we say it with our actions.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And for myself, like when I, I get angry, right, the Bible talks about what we're to do with our anger and the Bible says that the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.

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[SPEAKER_01]: When I walk in that, I think, oh, this is how I'm going to get the result I want or this is how I'm going to make myself feel better or that's me disagreeing with God.

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[SPEAKER_01]: I'm going to say actually my way is better God and my what my flesh is wanting right now.

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[SPEAKER_01]: I'm going to let it have it rather than

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[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Put my flesh into submission to this Holy Spirit and try and do what God says is better.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And then that comes to almost every aspect of how we operate in our marriage, how we operate in our relationship with our kids, with our friends.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And so as a as a Christian, not only do we look at God and we say we know that God's ways and thoughts are better and higher than ours, but that they're also powerful and effective.

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[SPEAKER_01]: like doing it his way works like better it's like the best way to do stuff and we all every believer has experienced this when you walk in the truth and the light you experience the truth and the light when you walk in the darkness and lies you experience the darkness and lies and so we want to walk in God's ways and His obedience to His word into His order

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[SPEAKER_01]: Because in his will, it accomplishes what he wants when we do what he's designing.

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[SPEAKER_01]: How he's designed it.

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[SPEAKER_01]: His wills accomplish in our lives are marriage and in the world.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So it's awesome.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And also, like what we mentioned as part of the title of this episode, when we submit to God's truth and walk in his ways and obedience to his word like you're saying, that's when we produce the fruit that he promises through his Holy Spirit.

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[SPEAKER_01]: The fruit that we want.

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[SPEAKER_01]: We all want the fruit of the Holy Spirit.

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[SPEAKER_01]: We want the good fruit in our life, good fruit in our marriage.

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[SPEAKER_01]: No one thinks of themselves like, I just want some bad fruit.

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[SPEAKER_01]: I'm happy that we're like happy and irritable.

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[SPEAKER_01]: No, we want good.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So what is God's order specifically for marriage?

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[SPEAKER_00]: That's just highlight that.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, this is going to be uncomfortable for some but in reality like we just like to look at the word a god and say what does it say?

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[SPEAKER_01]: This doesn't mean that we perfectly walk in it doesn't mean that don't want anyone perfectly walks in any of this stuff.

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[SPEAKER_01]: But at the end of the day, God's going to be right, and we're going to be wrong, and we need to submit to what He says.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And that's where I art should be, at least.

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[SPEAKER_01]: The order of marriage that produces the fruit and will of God in our marriage, and life goes like this.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And this is first Corinthians 113.

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[SPEAKER_01]: But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ.

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[SPEAKER_01]: The head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God.

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[SPEAKER_01]: This is specific to marriage.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It's talking about the order and authority and in marriage.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Jesus over the husband, the husband over the wife, God over Christ.

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[SPEAKER_00]: So what does it mean to be over?

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[SPEAKER_00]: Like, what does that mean?

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[SPEAKER_01]: Right?

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[SPEAKER_01]: It means headship, it means leadership, it means authoritative.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It means so like Jesus is to be my authority in my life And I think an increase from the belief that he's he's to be your authority also But this is this is talking about an order in within marriage Is that I default Defer to Christ

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[SPEAKER_01]: Not my own plan, not my own will, not my own way, his way, that is the ultimate like the way my walk should be.

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[SPEAKER_01]: That in my life in marriage, I'd refer to Christ as my head of my life in marriage.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And then the wife is to do the same for her husband, as I do to Christ.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And Christ, this is what's so powerful about this.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It doesn't just leave it at Jesus over the man, man, over the one.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It goes to God over Christ, and this is really important.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And so this is God's order in marriage, not ours.

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[SPEAKER_01]: I didn't come up with this, it wasn't my idea.

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[SPEAKER_01]: I don't think any one of us, you listening myself included would have come up with this idea.

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[SPEAKER_01]: This is God's design, this is God's idea.

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[SPEAKER_01]: and Paul continues to explain for us about the order of marriage in First Corinthians.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It says, it was on day six that he showed us the created order.

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[SPEAKER_01]: God did this.

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[SPEAKER_01]: He created and designed it this way.

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[SPEAKER_01]: He created the man first.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And then out of the man, the woman.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And there's a reason for this.

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[SPEAKER_01]: But I love in 1 Corinthians 11.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It denies this.

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[SPEAKER_01]: For man was not made from woman, but woman for man.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Neither was man created for woman, but woman for man.

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[SPEAKER_01]: So he's creating an argument on how the marriage relationship should function and why.

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[SPEAKER_01]: He's not just saying, men are better, therefore they should be in charge.

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[SPEAKER_01]: He's saying, here's how God set it up at day one, I should say day six, but wouldn't man in one were created.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And Genesis tells us why like that he created women to be, help me or Adam, to be his helper.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And we're going to get to that, because it's so powerful that the way that God set this up, the truth that Paul declares is that God made man first and then from him, his rib, made woman.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And the reason he made woman was like you just said.

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[SPEAKER_01]: for a purpose, for a powerful reason.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It's not just, here's a woman for you Adam.

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[SPEAKER_01]: There was so much involved in what God was doing.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And it's hard for many to hear.

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[SPEAKER_01]: It's hard for us to hear this, but this is how God designed it.

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[SPEAKER_01]: How he desired it to happen.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And it's the same argument that Paul and the other apostles, when it talks about marriage, give for the order of marriage is the order of

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[SPEAKER_01]: But here's what's really cool.

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[SPEAKER_01]: So it doesn't just end it.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Woman wasn't made for man, but man was, or woman was made for man, right?

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[SPEAKER_01]: But then it goes on in verse 11, that same section is never the less.

17:03.215 --> 17:09.561
[SPEAKER_01]: So even though that's how God started it, in the Lord, women is not independent of man, nor man of woman.

17:10.222 --> 17:13.745
[SPEAKER_01]: So he's saying neither of them are special and independent.

17:13.846 --> 17:16.328
[SPEAKER_01]: They actually are, they need each other.

17:16.460 --> 17:20.744
[SPEAKER_01]: Verse 12, four as a woman was made for man so now man is born of woman.

17:21.305 --> 17:23.427
[SPEAKER_01]: And all things are from God.

17:23.927 --> 17:24.107
[SPEAKER_00]: Amen.

17:24.648 --> 17:25.509
[SPEAKER_01]: Which is really cool.

17:25.569 --> 17:29.032
[SPEAKER_01]: Like not, it didn't just end at like, woman was made for man.

17:29.152 --> 17:31.515
[SPEAKER_01]: It's like actually all men are now going to come from woman.

17:31.975 --> 17:41.525
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, as you're a reading, I don't know if anyone else had this thought, but like only one woman was made from a man's rib, but like so many men have been born here.

17:41.545 --> 17:42.566
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, that's true actually.

17:43.266 --> 17:46.129
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, and he ends with all things are from God.

17:46.379 --> 18:03.325
[SPEAKER_01]: Right, the wife, Robert Stelsis, Jennifer, you are a gift, like to me specifically, but the wife is a gift and then also the husband is a gift, like the two were created in God's image, equally in value.

18:03.305 --> 18:04.486
[SPEAKER_01]: But there was an order to it.

18:04.867 --> 18:16.399
[SPEAKER_01]: That's why we talked about order is because of the pattern, the order that God's given us, Paul keeps using this argument of God's creation to show us the structure and order and authority within marriage.

18:17.300 --> 18:23.346
[SPEAKER_01]: And like we were saying before, when we walk in God's order, we see good fruit that comes from that.

18:23.927 --> 18:33.177
[SPEAKER_01]: When we walk out of order, we see chaos, we see sadness, we see

18:33.157 --> 18:43.287
[SPEAKER_01]: As we are walking this life out in our imperfect selves and fleshly nature, try moving towards God's order as best as possible.

18:43.708 --> 18:49.654
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and earlier I mentioned that order matters to God and that it should matter to us as well.

18:50.315 --> 18:56.521
[SPEAKER_00]: And you know Paul in sharing this in the New Testament is reminding us that, hey, this matters to him.

18:57.282 --> 18:58.303
[SPEAKER_00]: It needs to matter to us.

18:59.161 --> 19:01.724
[SPEAKER_01]: And this order doesn't come from society.

19:02.365 --> 19:05.388
[SPEAKER_01]: It came from God, it came from creation, it came from his design in order.

19:06.009 --> 19:10.134
[SPEAKER_01]: It doesn't come from some society or anywhere else, but it's given to us on day six.

19:10.534 --> 19:18.223
[SPEAKER_01]: And if we look to society, if we look to cultural norms and we look to what other people are saying about it and say, well, let's just shift toward that.

19:18.263 --> 19:19.685
[SPEAKER_01]: What they're saying sounds better.

19:20.425 --> 19:22.688
[SPEAKER_01]: Because that was so long ago.

19:22.668 --> 19:24.651
[SPEAKER_01]: you know, that can't be the best solution.

19:24.711 --> 19:25.972
[SPEAKER_01]: Here's a better solution.

19:27.034 --> 19:28.276
[SPEAKER_01]: We're going to be out of order.

19:29.157 --> 19:32.321
[SPEAKER_01]: So to start as husbands, so let's talk about this.

19:33.463 --> 19:38.609
[SPEAKER_01]: We do not have the authority as the head of our wife for our own personal gain.

19:39.371 --> 19:50.886
[SPEAKER_01]: So though the Bible says husbands are to be the head of the home, head of the wife, head of the family, spiritual leaders in every way, it doesn't give us that authority

19:51.035 --> 19:54.362
[SPEAKER_01]: It's not there for art, like, oh, I get it for my gain.

19:55.024 --> 19:55.745
[SPEAKER_01]: Look what I get out of this.

19:55.785 --> 19:57.769
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm like the king of my home and everyone's my subjects.

19:58.170 --> 19:59.092
[SPEAKER_01]: That's not how this works.

20:00.054 --> 20:05.466
[SPEAKER_01]: We have it from God as a means to accomplish God's will in our life and marriage.

20:06.155 --> 20:12.202
[SPEAKER_01]: So again, when we walk in God's ways, when we go like walking God's orders, it's to bring him glory, not me.

20:12.423 --> 20:17.208
[SPEAKER_00]: Which feels like more of a responsibility than, yeah, like power.

20:17.389 --> 20:18.570
[SPEAKER_00]: Like the privilege.

20:18.590 --> 20:18.810
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

20:19.030 --> 20:19.431
[SPEAKER_01]: That's true.

20:20.112 --> 20:24.357
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, and what's that old name with much power comes from much responsibility?

20:24.898 --> 20:36.111
[SPEAKER_01]: Like that, if it is, quote unquote, privilege that I could do the leader of my home, the head of my wife, the spiritual leader of my children,

20:36.091 --> 20:39.097
[SPEAKER_01]: That's not just a, like I said, privilege for my own sake.

20:39.759 --> 20:49.560
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a very serious role in position that God has given me, and it's meant to be used for him and his purposes and his will, not my own.

20:50.097 --> 21:11.245
[SPEAKER_01]: And it's when a husband walks in authority and headship without Christ over him is when we see so much pain broken a struggle destruction that's that's literally the out of work so it when I'm like I'm leader and Christ I'm not going to defer to Christ yeah then that that's a dangerous place for husband to be walking.

21:11.528 --> 21:22.170
[SPEAKER_00]: Can you share a little bit more about that walking in authority with or without Christ like what is what does that look like in someone's life and someone's marriage has been way of being.

21:22.691 --> 21:29.605
[SPEAKER_01]: Well again, so if I'm looking at my life and I think I'm in charge, I'm the leader and I can.

21:29.888 --> 21:30.429
[SPEAKER_01]: be lazy.

21:31.169 --> 21:37.575
[SPEAKER_01]: I can sit back and not and put my feet up and my wife needs to do all of this and my kids need to do all of that and to serve me.

21:38.816 --> 21:40.458
[SPEAKER_01]: That's a, that's a wicked place to be.

21:41.118 --> 21:44.041
[SPEAKER_01]: That I'm not, I'm not actually leading anything.

21:44.942 --> 21:46.143
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm not leading that Christen.

21:46.884 --> 21:48.345
[SPEAKER_01]: What I'm doing is I'm wanting to be served.

21:49.346 --> 21:49.446
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

21:49.466 --> 21:53.290
[SPEAKER_01]: And that doesn't mean being served is bad because like that is something that we do for each other.

21:53.430 --> 21:54.150
[SPEAKER_01]: We serve each other.

21:54.171 --> 21:54.751
[SPEAKER_01]: We serve our kids.

21:54.771 --> 21:59.035
[SPEAKER_01]: You serve me,

21:59.015 --> 22:07.146
[SPEAKER_01]: And so if I'm demanding that you submit no bay and surrender to me, but I'm not willing to submit and surrender and obey Christ.

22:08.347 --> 22:14.335
[SPEAKER_01]: That's going to be a very dangerous place for me to be walking as a husband and a painful place to put you.

22:14.756 --> 22:25.490
[SPEAKER_00]: And it could be like unwise, especially if you're not yielding to Christ's leadership and be sensitive to the Holy Spirit and like even making decisions for your family.

22:26.451 --> 22:28.093
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, that could be really unwise.

22:28.613 --> 22:35.248
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, and so as it husbands, our job as the leaders is to submit to Christ.

22:36.030 --> 22:38.515
[SPEAKER_01]: In the same way, our wives are to submit us.

22:38.776 --> 22:40.580
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

22:40.600 --> 22:41.863
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's think in.

22:42.063 --> 22:46.171
[SPEAKER_01]: Our jobs, our hearts, our responsibilities, as husbands is to submit to Christ.

22:46.832 --> 22:49.939
[SPEAKER_01]: In the same way that our wives are called to submit to us.

22:51.321 --> 23:01.742
[SPEAKER_00]: And for wives, like we are called to submit to our husbands, and I think there is a, what's the word, like a covering, uh, uh,

23:01.722 --> 23:22.026
[SPEAKER_00]: protection there of being able to yield and defer to our husbands, but but the same way that a husband can yield to Christ as Christ yields the Lord to the Father, we can look at Christ as our example to because when he is here he submitted to the Father and he

23:22.141 --> 23:24.807
[SPEAKER_01]: which is a really, which is them glad you brought that out.

23:24.827 --> 23:34.108
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a really powerful picture that Jesus gives us, because He's not just trying to ask me, you know, you and your wife to do something that He's never done.

23:34.848 --> 23:42.157
[SPEAKER_01]: The reason it says in God over Christ is because Jesus himself exemplifies this for us, like you just said.

23:42.837 --> 23:48.524
[SPEAKER_01]: John 638 is as far I have come down from heaven not to do my own will, but the will of him who sent me.

23:49.185 --> 23:50.927
[SPEAKER_01]: He's saying he's like, I'm not here to do anything on my own.

23:52.309 --> 23:54.331
[SPEAKER_01]: Everything I'm doing, God told me to do it.

23:54.772 --> 23:56.714
[SPEAKER_01]: Luke 2242, I want to read that one.

23:57.074 --> 24:01.800
[SPEAKER_00]: Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me, never the less, not my will, but yours be done.

24:01.898 --> 24:04.801
[SPEAKER_01]: This is Jesus in the garden of this Manny before he goes to the cross.

24:05.642 --> 24:08.846
[SPEAKER_01]: He's pleading with the Father, but then saying, but then submitting to him.

24:09.126 --> 24:17.856
[SPEAKER_00]: And you could see in experience like his, the posture of his heart, his attitude and his perspective and his belief in yielding in this way to the Father.

24:17.976 --> 24:18.617
[SPEAKER_01]: And every way.

24:19.218 --> 24:22.161
[SPEAKER_01]: John 530, I can do nothing on my own.

24:22.241 --> 24:23.142
[SPEAKER_01]: This is Jesus speaking.

24:23.623 --> 24:25.024
[SPEAKER_01]: I can do nothing on my own.

24:25.525 --> 24:26.766
[SPEAKER_01]: As I hear, I judge.

24:27.307 --> 24:31.872
[SPEAKER_01]: And my judgment is just because I seek not my own will,

24:32.510 --> 24:37.181
[SPEAKER_01]: Jesus is continuing to show his submission to the Father John 519.

24:37.201 --> 24:49.270
[SPEAKER_00]: It says so Jesus said to him, truly truly I say to you, the Son can do nothing on his of his own accord, but only what he sees the Father doing for whatever the Father does that the Son does likewise.

24:49.621 --> 24:56.287
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know how many of you listening have realized this, but Jesus was not autonomous when he was your on earth.

24:56.467 --> 24:59.270
[SPEAKER_01]: He was fully submitted to God in everything.

24:59.350 --> 25:06.816
[SPEAKER_01]: John 1249 through 54, I have not spoken on my own authority, but the Father who sent me has himself given me a commandment.

25:07.397 --> 25:08.818
[SPEAKER_01]: So Jesus even followed the commandments.

25:09.759 --> 25:11.381
[SPEAKER_01]: All of it, actually, perfect.

25:11.401 --> 25:13.002
[SPEAKER_01]: What to say and what to speak?

25:13.442 --> 25:19.628
[SPEAKER_01]: And I know that his commandment is eternal life.

25:19.608 --> 25:27.395
[SPEAKER_01]: Jesus didn't speak, act, sleep, do, anything that was outside of the Father's will.

25:28.156 --> 25:31.599
[SPEAKER_01]: It was all what God wanted for Him and through Him.

25:32.380 --> 25:34.542
[SPEAKER_01]: And this is what we're to do.

25:34.802 --> 25:39.166
[SPEAKER_01]: Jesus went where the Father told Him, did what the Father told Him, spoke with the Father told Him.

25:39.646 --> 25:49.075
[SPEAKER_00]: This is the example that we as husbands and wives are given in Christ.

25:50.118 --> 25:53.284
[SPEAKER_01]: which is very hard and nearly impossible with the Holy Spirit.

25:53.604 --> 25:59.014
[SPEAKER_01]: God is the head of Christ, Christ is the head of the husband, the husband is the head of the wife.

26:00.156 --> 26:08.211
[SPEAKER_01]: In order to walk in the authority, God has given us His husband's men, in our marriages, we must walk in full submission to our head who is Christ.

26:08.191 --> 26:10.916
[SPEAKER_01]: He must be the true leader of our marriage and family.

26:11.578 --> 26:13.642
[SPEAKER_01]: It can't be just us, like, I have a plan.

26:13.742 --> 26:17.569
[SPEAKER_01]: Here's my marching orders for us, which we're to do.

26:17.609 --> 26:19.393
[SPEAKER_01]: We're supposed to be guiding in that way.

26:20.255 --> 26:28.090
[SPEAKER_01]: But man, if we are not submitted to the Lord in all things, like we're going to be leading our family in the wrong direction.

26:28.222 --> 26:29.425
[SPEAKER_00]: and be held accountable for that.

26:29.565 --> 26:30.468
[SPEAKER_01]: And be held accountable for it.

26:31.230 --> 26:33.796
[SPEAKER_01]: Here's what's hard about this.

26:35.681 --> 26:39.210
[SPEAKER_01]: How we lead is directly tied to how we are led by Christ.

26:40.169 --> 26:41.131
[SPEAKER_01]: That's a big point.

26:41.151 --> 26:44.718
[SPEAKER_01]: How we lead is directly tied to how we are led by Christ.

26:45.719 --> 27:00.928
[SPEAKER_01]: And also, when it comes to our specific, the order of our home, like me as the head of my home and you to submit to me, our specific roles are not as we always say are not contingent on the other person's obedience.

27:01.263 --> 27:13.459
[SPEAKER_00]: So you're saying, if you're not following the Lord or yielding to Him or abiding in Him, I still have a requirement and a calling on my place as a wife to submit to you.

27:13.739 --> 27:16.663
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, out of your own love for God, out of your own submission to Him.

27:17.484 --> 27:24.814
[SPEAKER_01]: And I, regardless of my wife, is submitting to me or yielding to me or deferring to me or respecting me.

27:24.894 --> 27:29.380
[SPEAKER_01]: Any of the things that I'm quote unquote deserved in order.

27:30.777 --> 27:32.920
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm to lead in Christ.

27:33.701 --> 27:41.291
[SPEAKER_00]: So the order of operation and how we should function and marriage, the motivation for that then is not how much we love each other.

27:41.331 --> 27:42.072
[SPEAKER_00]: Nope.

27:42.092 --> 27:43.974
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not how long we've been married.

27:44.955 --> 27:48.420
[SPEAKER_01]: It's not that it's not based off the plan that we have set up together of who's going to do what?

27:48.740 --> 27:50.422
[SPEAKER_00]: Or how good life is in that season.

27:50.483 --> 27:53.446
[SPEAKER_00]: The motivation is a love of Christ.

27:54.007 --> 27:55.309
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

27:55.329 --> 27:55.990
[SPEAKER_01]: As exactly it is.

27:57.071 --> 28:00.075
[SPEAKER_01]: So are we praying and seeking the Lord's wisdom for our lives, men?

28:00.747 --> 28:04.795
[SPEAKER_01]: Are we seeking his wisdom and guidance for our careers or health?

28:05.817 --> 28:07.921
[SPEAKER_01]: Any of those things are family?

28:08.583 --> 28:11.749
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, are we going to him only when we are in trouble?

28:12.250 --> 28:13.112
[SPEAKER_01]: Only when we're weak?

28:13.172 --> 28:15.036
[SPEAKER_01]: Only when we realize like, oh, I can't do my own anymore.

28:15.998 --> 28:18.222
[SPEAKER_01]: We need to be asked in order to direct our steps and decisions.

28:18.583 --> 28:19.144
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

28:19.124 --> 28:19.725
[SPEAKER_01]: all the time.

28:20.226 --> 28:27.996
[SPEAKER_01]: We need to be seeking him to protect the protection of our family by walking in integrity, impurity, that we need to do that in Christ, because that's what Christ is calling us to.

28:28.998 --> 28:32.002
[SPEAKER_01]: And I'll be allowing the Word of God to be our foundation for truth.

28:33.144 --> 28:36.548
[SPEAKER_01]: As leaders, these are the questions that we should be asking ourselves, the things that we should be seeking.

28:37.350 --> 28:37.690
[SPEAKER_01]: So,

28:38.378 --> 28:46.761
[SPEAKER_00]: What would you say are some of the ways Christ's example has transformed you specifically as a husband and blessed you as you walk in his ways?

28:47.603 --> 28:51.173
[SPEAKER_00]: Like choosing not your own but like focusing on, I'm going to do it his way.

28:51.693 --> 28:58.023
[SPEAKER_01]: When I was thinking about that garden because 70 prayer that Jesus gives, God used that to save our marriage.

28:58.103 --> 29:00.246
[SPEAKER_01]: Story to save our marriage, which I know was really powerful.

29:00.947 --> 29:05.755
[SPEAKER_01]: And often brings it back up in my heart like, hey, remember you said you were going to keep doing this?

29:05.775 --> 29:09.340
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm like, you know this?

29:09.360 --> 29:14.528
[SPEAKER_01]: Transforming me on how to love, which is very difficult for me, like the emotional side of things.

29:14.508 --> 29:17.973
[SPEAKER_01]: communication, how to serve.

29:18.934 --> 29:24.822
[SPEAKER_01]: These are all things that know in Christ, does his compassion, how to suffer with.

29:25.964 --> 29:27.546
[SPEAKER_01]: All things that are not natural for me.

29:28.307 --> 29:30.631
[SPEAKER_01]: The things that I desire to grow in, I am growing in.

29:31.191 --> 29:33.475
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm getting all from his example to me.

29:34.396 --> 29:34.896
[SPEAKER_02]: That's awesome.

29:37.320 --> 29:41.005
[SPEAKER_01]: Our main mission, guys, in calling as a husband.

29:42.115 --> 29:44.663
[SPEAKER_01]: is that we would lead our wife and family's closer to Christ.

29:46.007 --> 29:48.034
[SPEAKER_01]: And so how can we do that if we're not close with Christ?

29:49.719 --> 29:54.133
[SPEAKER_01]: Like we need a, like Christ, his mission was to draw men close to God.

29:55.396 --> 30:02.085
[SPEAKER_01]: It says that he came to reconcile men to the Father, but that means it's to make good to get to connect us.

30:02.105 --> 30:04.127
[SPEAKER_01]: So we have that same mission in our home.

30:04.408 --> 30:05.309
[SPEAKER_00]: And think about that.

30:06.310 --> 30:16.864
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, I'm sure you guys have heard the phrase of like living a legacy of like when you implement God's ways and you're yielding to him and submitting to his truth and

30:16.844 --> 30:24.652
[SPEAKER_00]: being obedient to his word to lead like Christ and lead in in a loving kind, compassionate, but sacrificial way.

30:24.672 --> 30:32.620
[SPEAKER_00]: But authoritative way, you're you're setting an example for your children on how to do that.

30:33.280 --> 30:45.012
[SPEAKER_00]: On how to lay yourself down, like you mentioned the word sacrifice, like you're showing them how to do that in marriage so that one day when they get married,

30:45.481 --> 30:46.903
[SPEAKER_01]: So what do you like to talk about wives now?

30:47.304 --> 30:48.386
[SPEAKER_01]: Should we just skip that one?

30:48.406 --> 30:49.728
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, you're doing a really good job.

30:49.748 --> 30:50.870
[SPEAKER_00]: I feel like you should just give that.

30:50.890 --> 30:51.411
[SPEAKER_01]: You jump in.

30:51.551 --> 30:51.912
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay.

30:53.354 --> 31:01.448
[SPEAKER_00]: The wives calling in are marriages to submit to and respect her husband as her head as a leader of their family and their home.

31:01.428 --> 31:08.695
[SPEAKER_00]: This is not a passive role where she simply just does what he says, just like Christ and those verses that we just looked over.

31:09.336 --> 31:13.520
[SPEAKER_00]: Christ actively walked out this in his ministry in the world.

31:13.560 --> 31:17.824
[SPEAKER_00]: He was in submission to the Father, and so he's our example.

31:18.745 --> 31:29.595
[SPEAKER_00]: Just as the husband is to actively walk out his ministry in his home and marriage, like his submission to Christ, we also get that

31:30.132 --> 31:36.019
[SPEAKER_00]: the wife walks out her ministry in the home and submission to her husband and ultimately to Christ because it's kind of both.

31:36.320 --> 31:37.902
[SPEAKER_00]: It's simultaneous, that's the same thing.

31:37.922 --> 31:39.423
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, you're not submitting to me only.

31:39.464 --> 31:40.345
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I get out of them.

31:40.485 --> 31:51.619
[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm sure we'll say out of my personal experience that I've only been able to complete or follow through with being obedient to the words word because of my relationship with Christ.

31:52.159 --> 31:54.402
[SPEAKER_00]: Like I would, like I said, that's where my motivation comes out.

31:54.422 --> 31:56.144
[SPEAKER_01]: Using as a natural that you just want to like.

31:56.204 --> 31:56.865
[SPEAKER_00]: No.

31:56.845 --> 32:00.891
[SPEAKER_00]: It's probably more natural that if the other way, that I want to lead.

32:01.332 --> 32:02.013
[SPEAKER_00]: I want to take charge.

32:03.535 --> 32:07.482
[SPEAKER_00]: God calls Eve Adam's help me, or a perfectly fit helper.

32:09.044 --> 32:09.985
[SPEAKER_00]: Which is a really cool thing.

32:10.005 --> 32:14.553
[SPEAKER_00]: There's a note here about how powerful of an example the Holy Spirit is to being God's helper.

32:15.194 --> 32:19.360
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's funny because I think women, like I think we can relate to the Holy Spirit in a lot of ways.

32:19.340 --> 32:21.642
[SPEAKER_01]: Because trying to, like, we can Victor's.

32:21.743 --> 32:25.767
[SPEAKER_00]: We were, we were, we were a mind our husbands often about what things have been said.

32:26.407 --> 32:27.569
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, no, I'm kidding.

32:27.589 --> 32:28.610
[SPEAKER_00]: That's funny, but that is true.

32:28.690 --> 32:32.594
[SPEAKER_00]: There's a, there's a nature and a part of us that wants to help in that way.

32:32.654 --> 32:34.616
[SPEAKER_00]: And sometimes we could be a little over aggressive.

32:34.816 --> 32:40.983
[SPEAKER_00]: And so we need to have self control, but uh, and do it under, yeah, in the respectful manner that the Bible calls us to do.

32:41.684 --> 32:44.807
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, but I do like being able to relate to the Holy Spirit in that way.

32:44.787 --> 32:50.219
[SPEAKER_00]: in the beginning God creates the world and creates a very special garden where he puts man.

32:50.761 --> 32:56.474
[SPEAKER_00]: This garden is a blessing and a gift to Adam and it's filled with animals and plants and rivers and all these precious things.

32:56.494 --> 32:58.238
[SPEAKER_01]: It's such a cool, like picture too.

32:58.458 --> 33:02.307
[SPEAKER_00]: And then God commands Adam to cultivate

33:02.287 --> 33:09.033
[SPEAKER_00]: to take care of it and even name the animals and subdue the earth in which God created.

33:09.113 --> 33:14.177
[SPEAKER_00]: So so Adam becomes this kind of like partner with God, like he's a cobra.

33:14.217 --> 33:15.018
[SPEAKER_00]: He's a helper with God.

33:15.638 --> 33:24.246
[SPEAKER_00]: But God recognizes that Adam is alone and says in Genesis 2018 you guys know this, then the Lord God said it is not good that the man should be alone.

33:24.266 --> 33:31.872
[SPEAKER_00]: I will make him a helper fit for him.

33:32.189 --> 33:34.573
[SPEAKER_01]: Which man we gotta recognize, we have needs and weaknesses.

33:35.053 --> 33:43.226
[SPEAKER_00]: And then he brings in Eve, you know, drawn from Adam's rib, his very own body, and God calls her his helper.

33:43.747 --> 33:51.158
[SPEAKER_00]: So not a servant, not a slave, not less than, but a helper, also a co-labor, also a partner, right?

33:51.859 --> 33:56.526
[SPEAKER_00]: With Adam to accomplish this work that God has given him to cultivate this garden.

33:56.506 --> 34:13.131
[SPEAKER_00]: So Eve has now adopted and inherited by marriage to Adam, this ministry of Garden cultivation and curation that God gives a job to Adam and then doesn't want him to do it alone and so makes him a helper, makes him a woman.

34:13.111 --> 34:26.133
[SPEAKER_01]: that not only can do it with him side by side, the 10th of the garden but also bear children and like have a family and start feeling the earth and it's just a it's a really cool thing that he how he worked that out and the order he did it.

34:26.253 --> 34:26.594
[SPEAKER_00]: Totally.

34:27.095 --> 34:28.437
[SPEAKER_01]: The intentionality at it so.

34:28.670 --> 34:33.194
[SPEAKER_00]: So we have these two people who are now one, right?

34:33.234 --> 34:37.338
[SPEAKER_00]: They're, they're really one because he was made from him.

34:37.418 --> 34:39.740
[SPEAKER_01]: That was the first marriage right there.

34:39.760 --> 34:43.864
[SPEAKER_00]: And they can accomplish this ministry that God has for them in the garden.

34:44.604 --> 34:58.677
[SPEAKER_00]: And likewise, we just wanted to relate that picture of the first husband and wife and draw from it that we as husband and wife have a ministry that God has given us.

34:58.657 --> 35:04.403
[SPEAKER_00]: We have our homes, our relationships, our relationships in marriage, and our relationships with our children.

35:05.044 --> 35:12.832
[SPEAKER_00]: Though that is like, think about the garden cultivation that they had to do, like, we are cultivating the garden within our homes.

35:12.852 --> 35:15.675
[SPEAKER_01]: He's given us a little garden to manage and to take care.

35:15.695 --> 35:16.476
[SPEAKER_00]: And ministry.

35:16.796 --> 35:20.700
[SPEAKER_00]: And ministry, like, the relationships at church and with friends.

35:20.800 --> 35:27.347
[SPEAKER_00]: And just all the things that he's given us to operate in order.

35:27.327 --> 35:28.709
[SPEAKER_00]: So that got us glorified.

35:29.671 --> 35:30.672
[SPEAKER_00]: We can be a team for him.

35:31.153 --> 35:46.177
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, we learned last episode of both parts, the husband and the wife and how necessary they are in the womb for the marriage because you need to take a and for the children for the raising of our children to know God to be healthy humans.

35:47.939 --> 35:50.263
[SPEAKER_01]: There is no

35:50.243 --> 36:06.953
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, you can do it without each other, but like we talked about, the best or with the most fruit is going to come from a whole complete home where the husband and wife are both submitted to the Lord in leading the family that way.

36:07.439 --> 36:16.798
[SPEAKER_00]: We have a short list here, just highlighting how beautiful women are, and how God created them and design them, and how he has... And he easily fit.

36:17.198 --> 36:17.960
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

36:17.980 --> 36:22.809
[SPEAKER_00]: And he's spoken to these parts of her nature and character throughout his word.

36:23.090 --> 36:27.118
[SPEAKER_00]: And so we don't have the verse, the scriptures for you guys, but I think you'll...

36:27.098 --> 36:46.457
[SPEAKER_00]: hear it and go oh I'm familiar with that we also know it anecdotally like we we know this in nature yeah when we see like women are generally more this way yeah but we want to highlight it because it shows that um that kind of uh what am I trying to say like a comparison but

36:46.437 --> 36:50.261
[SPEAKER_00]: The value, the uniqueness and the value that she brings to the team.

36:50.902 --> 37:00.412
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's her compassion, her gentle and quiet spirit, her dedication to her husband and children, her heart for God, her resolve to stand for her family.

37:01.093 --> 37:02.474
[SPEAKER_00]: She guides her children in truth.

37:02.855 --> 37:05.658
[SPEAKER_00]: She encourages her husband when he has discouraged and tired.

37:06.138 --> 37:07.740
[SPEAKER_00]: She prays for them with persistence.

37:07.960 --> 37:09.762
[SPEAKER_00]: She builds the house to be a home.

37:10.737 --> 37:13.780
[SPEAKER_01]: And these are all things that, I guess, it's a team effort.

37:14.401 --> 37:16.423
[SPEAKER_01]: But that's the point of what we're talking about.

37:16.863 --> 37:26.433
[SPEAKER_01]: The uniqueness of my wife's giftings and abilities and biology and the way God made her as a perfectly fit helper for me.

37:26.494 --> 37:33.421
[SPEAKER_01]: And then me and how God made me as a perfectly fit leader for her in our home.

37:34.202 --> 37:39.327
[SPEAKER_01]: And again, that doesn't mean that I perfectly lead, but that when we, when our desires are to do that,

37:39.830 --> 37:46.888
[SPEAKER_01]: when we walk in these like we see the fruit nearly instantly not only in our own marriage but also in our children.

37:47.970 --> 37:50.717
[SPEAKER_01]: And the moment we try and like

37:51.338 --> 37:53.844
[SPEAKER_01]: I try and abdicate my responsibility.

37:54.285 --> 37:56.329
[SPEAKER_01]: You try and take on some of that responsibility.

37:56.349 --> 37:57.993
[SPEAKER_01]: There's like the swapping of rules.

37:59.156 --> 38:01.160
[SPEAKER_01]: Things just start getting going out of control.

38:01.461 --> 38:02.664
[SPEAKER_01]: Things start getting chaotic.

38:02.744 --> 38:03.766
[SPEAKER_01]: Motion starts changing.

38:04.528 --> 38:05.971
[SPEAKER_01]: Relational breaking happens.

38:06.071 --> 38:10.782
[SPEAKER_01]: Like there's all sorts of damage that comes nearly instantly the moment we go out of order.

38:11.133 --> 38:24.527
[SPEAKER_00]: So to keep that order and to tighten everything up and glue it together and keep it strong, is going back to what I said the motivation is, it is our independent relationships with Christ.

38:24.987 --> 38:36.338
[SPEAKER_00]: Like that is the motivation and the feel that keeps us going and makes us want to walk and practice his ways and not ours and to thrive and grow and be fruitful.

38:36.959 --> 38:40.903
[SPEAKER_00]: And so a biting in Christ is like a utmost important

38:41.491 --> 38:43.035
[SPEAKER_01]: and he read that quote from your devotional.

38:43.336 --> 38:48.028
[SPEAKER_00]: In wife after God, it says, this fruitfulness in your life is produced when you are bite and Christ.

38:48.409 --> 38:53.121
[SPEAKER_00]: To abide means you submit to Him in reverence, you accept His truth and you remain steadfast.

38:53.168 --> 38:54.911
[SPEAKER_01]: You continue on.

38:54.951 --> 38:57.175
[SPEAKER_01]: Our kids were asking about this the other day.

38:57.195 --> 38:58.016
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, what does a Biden mean?

38:58.437 --> 38:59.559
[SPEAKER_01]: It means to continue.

38:59.579 --> 39:01.703
[SPEAKER_01]: It means to stay with.

39:02.244 --> 39:03.045
[SPEAKER_01]: Keep in step with.

39:03.907 --> 39:13.083
[SPEAKER_01]: John 15, 4 through five, Jesus says, abide in me and I in you as the branch cannot bear fruit by itself unless it abides in the vine.

39:13.844 --> 39:16.729
[SPEAKER_01]: Neither can you unless you abide in me.

39:16.709 --> 39:24.003
[SPEAKER_01]: I am the vine, you are the branches, whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that that bears much fruit for a part for me, you can do nothing.

39:24.865 --> 39:26.147
[SPEAKER_01]: Won't good fruit in our marriages?

39:26.267 --> 39:27.390
[SPEAKER_01]: Won't good fruit in our families?

39:27.570 --> 39:28.251
[SPEAKER_00]: Can't do it without him.

39:28.552 --> 39:29.814
[SPEAKER_00]: We need to abide in Christ.

39:29.834 --> 39:30.255
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

39:30.275 --> 39:36.928
[SPEAKER_01]: We need to abide in His ways, in His truth, in His life, when He keeps in step with Him, where He's going, we need to follow.

39:37.060 --> 39:47.216
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, and also where he's already gone, we need to use as an example and consider because he's already shown us the way we need to accept it and we need to walk in accordance with it.

39:47.276 --> 39:54.807
[SPEAKER_00]: And so we need to conform our minds and our hearts to be like his and we do that with him, not without him.

39:55.108 --> 40:00.937
[SPEAKER_01]: And when we do that, guys, Gals, our will becomes his will.

40:01.878 --> 40:02.980
[SPEAKER_01]: Let me say that backwards.

40:03.000 --> 40:04.502
[SPEAKER_01]: His will becomes our will.

40:05.073 --> 40:06.016
[SPEAKER_01]: That's more like what I want to say.

40:06.759 --> 40:07.763
[SPEAKER_01]: His will becomes our will.

40:08.445 --> 40:09.148
[SPEAKER_01]: And that's what we want.

40:09.449 --> 40:10.292
[SPEAKER_01]: Because we all have a will.

40:10.312 --> 40:11.617
[SPEAKER_01]: We all have a desire.

40:11.657 --> 40:12.781
[SPEAKER_01]: We want something in our life.

40:13.785 --> 40:16.635
[SPEAKER_01]: And some of those things line up with his will.

40:17.324 --> 40:18.505
[SPEAKER_01]: Many of them are not going to.

40:18.886 --> 40:21.209
[SPEAKER_01]: That's just the nature of how we think and how we behave.

40:21.970 --> 40:25.874
[SPEAKER_01]: But we want more and more that his will becomes our will.

40:26.535 --> 40:27.396
[SPEAKER_01]: That's why we pray.

40:27.416 --> 40:29.038
[SPEAKER_01]: That's why we see him as why we're in his word.

40:29.058 --> 40:38.630
[SPEAKER_01]: And wife after God it says, as you abide in Christ, you are transformed by God's power, therefore able to bear fruit of the Holy Spirit.

40:39.391 --> 40:42.174
[SPEAKER_01]: And it's true when we're in Christ, His Spirit dwelling in us.

40:42.635 --> 40:45.458
[SPEAKER_01]: We us keeping in step with the Spirit is for St. Joseph.

40:45.438 --> 40:52.934
[SPEAKER_00]: and Galatians 5, 22 says, but the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.

40:53.355 --> 41:00.451
[SPEAKER_00]: Again, such things, there is no law, and those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires, which you were just talking about.

41:00.771 --> 41:03.818
[SPEAKER_00]: If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in

41:04.017 --> 41:04.738
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, it's in Galatians.

41:04.838 --> 41:05.739
[SPEAKER_01]: Not in Africa.

41:05.759 --> 41:06.320
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I know.

41:06.340 --> 41:10.024
[SPEAKER_01]: And first John says something similar though about walking in the spirit.

41:10.785 --> 41:13.048
[SPEAKER_01]: But we have to keep in step with the spirit.

41:13.689 --> 41:18.575
[SPEAKER_01]: And the fruit comes from a binding in Christ, not from me trying really, really, really, really hard.

41:19.335 --> 41:21.738
[SPEAKER_01]: Like we might be able to produce a little bit of fake fruit.

41:22.299 --> 41:26.064
[SPEAKER_01]: But the real fruit comes by the power of the Holy Spirit.

41:27.465 --> 41:33.973
[SPEAKER_01]: And so these should be the marks of a Christ filled home,

41:34.190 --> 41:40.335
[SPEAKER_01]: pursue the order that God has for her, that the husband's desire is to pursue the order God has for him.

41:40.433 --> 41:58.280
[SPEAKER_00]: And as we do this, this fruitfulness in our life is going to impact the world, but it's going to start right here in our marriages, right here in our marriage, like you and I as we walk with God and abide in His word, like the fruitfulness starts right here and then flows out from our family and impacts the world.

41:58.380 --> 41:58.841
[SPEAKER_00]: It truly does.

41:59.622 --> 42:08.736
[SPEAKER_00]: Your spouse receives this benefit of tasting the goodness of God through your character and your actions and what you believe

42:08.716 --> 42:09.639
[SPEAKER_00]: They are blessed.

42:10.220 --> 42:13.068
[SPEAKER_00]: When you're a loving and kind, they are blessed.

42:13.088 --> 42:14.913
[SPEAKER_01]: You're long-suffering, others are blessed.

42:14.933 --> 42:17.761
[SPEAKER_01]: So the fruits of the spirit are intended for others to enjoy.

42:17.781 --> 42:21.591
[SPEAKER_01]: And as the ones bearing the fruit, get to enjoy them also.

42:22.133 --> 42:22.233
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

42:22.253 --> 42:22.434
[SPEAKER_01]: But.

42:23.015 --> 42:24.700
[SPEAKER_00]: Here's a big takeaway.

42:24.680 --> 42:28.947
[SPEAKER_00]: You have impact and impression despite your sins, faults and failures.

42:29.769 --> 42:32.674
[SPEAKER_00]: Because the truth is we are going to keep like we do sin.

42:32.694 --> 42:33.215
[SPEAKER_00]: We're going to mess up.

42:33.235 --> 42:33.896
[SPEAKER_00]: We're going to mess up.

42:33.916 --> 42:34.637
[SPEAKER_00]: We're going to fail.

42:35.038 --> 42:38.023
[SPEAKER_00]: There's going to be times when things aren't so great in marriage.

42:38.984 --> 42:40.287
[SPEAKER_01]: Should I say that often?

42:40.667 --> 42:41.889
[SPEAKER_01]: Like it's more often than not.

42:41.909 --> 42:42.390
[SPEAKER_01]: We're going to fail.

42:43.312 --> 42:43.532
[SPEAKER_01]: Thank you.

42:43.512 --> 42:45.635
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, listen, that's just the truth.

42:45.695 --> 42:46.396
[SPEAKER_00]: We are going to.

42:46.417 --> 42:46.517
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

42:47.318 --> 42:56.592
[SPEAKER_00]: And that part sucks and, you know, there, it's hard because I know that we wrestle with shame and frustration over those things.

42:57.494 --> 43:03.002
[SPEAKER_00]: But if we remain steadfast in Christ and we abide in Him, he is going to renew us.

43:03.243 --> 43:05.486
[SPEAKER_00]: He is going to help us.

43:05.606 --> 43:06.768
[SPEAKER_00]: He's going to transform us.

43:06.788 --> 43:07.910
[SPEAKER_01]: Remember, women's eight one.

43:07.930 --> 43:11.275
[SPEAKER_01]: There is therefore no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

43:11.255 --> 43:15.120
[SPEAKER_00]: And you can still have impacts and fruitfulness can still be in your life.

43:15.721 --> 43:18.685
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, you think about all of the most impactful characters in the Bible?

43:19.006 --> 43:19.667
[SPEAKER_01]: They're all sinners.

43:20.828 --> 43:21.509
[SPEAKER_01]: Sorry to break it to you.

43:22.130 --> 43:25.735
[SPEAKER_01]: But that's us, like, but we're not having these fruits.

43:25.775 --> 43:28.399
[SPEAKER_01]: We're not having this impact in our in-the-world because of ourselves.

43:29.100 --> 43:36.570
[SPEAKER_01]: We're doing it because of the spirit of God that's in us, working through us, empowering us to do what He's called us to do.

43:36.955 --> 43:38.717
[SPEAKER_00]: And now here's the thing about fruitfulness.

43:39.438 --> 43:45.526
[SPEAKER_00]: We can't forget about those seeds inside the fruit that God has so creatively designed early in order.

43:45.647 --> 43:46.488
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, in order.

43:46.508 --> 43:49.512
[SPEAKER_01]: Which came first the fruit of the same because you need the seeds.

43:49.792 --> 43:54.438
[SPEAKER_00]: You guys, this fruitfulness that gets produced in our life is ready to reproduce.

43:54.939 --> 44:03.891
[SPEAKER_00]: So think about, again, our children and leaving a legacy with our children so that when they grow up and become adults and have families and then they're raising their children.

44:04.360 --> 44:15.990
[SPEAKER_00]: We play a huge role in showing them and showing those seeds of God's order and God's fruitfulness in marriage and family and in everything, in every aspect of our life.

44:16.223 --> 44:30.745
[SPEAKER_01]: And I just want to reiterate, we as believers, Christians who love Jesus, we got to run away from the world's idea of order, which is not order at all, and we need to run towards God's design.

44:31.727 --> 44:32.909
[SPEAKER_01]: It's just so much better.

44:33.029 --> 44:34.611
[SPEAKER_01]: It is the right way.

44:35.152 --> 44:36.354
[SPEAKER_01]: It's the only way.

44:36.995 --> 44:38.858
[SPEAKER_01]: And all the other ones lead to destruction.

44:38.898 --> 44:42.383
[SPEAKER_01]: And so we just want to show our kids

44:42.802 --> 44:46.472
[SPEAKER_01]: no matter how hard it is, the better way, which has gone to me.

44:47.013 --> 44:54.212
[SPEAKER_01]: His ideas, his thoughts, and let's just do our best in the power of the Holy Spirit to pursue those things.

44:54.530 --> 45:01.479
[SPEAKER_00]: in, at the end of every episode, we like to share a quote from our book, Mirage After God, and this one's for today.

45:02.341 --> 45:09.330
[SPEAKER_00]: A Mirage After God is completely submitted to the Lord in action, will, desires, finances, parenting, and every other part of life.

45:09.791 --> 45:17.321
[SPEAKER_00]: A Mirage After God understands, drives authority and lives according to the order God has placed in regard to our most intimate relationship.

45:17.341 --> 45:17.641
[SPEAKER_01]: Beautiful.

45:18.562 --> 45:18.703
[SPEAKER_01]: Mm-hmm.

45:18.723 --> 45:19.043
[SPEAKER_01]: That's good.

45:19.624 --> 45:22.748
[SPEAKER_01]: We got one discussion question for you to consider with your spouse.

45:22.728 --> 45:26.017
[SPEAKER_01]: says how will intentional increase in fruit production?

45:26.057 --> 45:33.598
[SPEAKER_01]: Let me say again, how will an intentional increase in fruit production positively affect your relationship with God and your spouse?

45:34.085 --> 45:46.779
[SPEAKER_00]: First let me add to that question, because I think sometimes we think that the answer lies in considering an increase in fruitfulness, that if we need more patients, because we know that about ourselves, that we're just going to try and be more patient.

45:47.059 --> 45:47.760
[SPEAKER_01]: It's just try harder.

45:48.020 --> 45:58.371
[SPEAKER_00]: Just try harder, just like, you know, but if we're not abiding in Christ and in His Word and learning from Him, can we be transformed in that way and will there be an increase?

45:58.655 --> 46:04.787
[SPEAKER_01]: maybe like for a short while, like tread water long enough and we'll get a little bit more.

46:04.807 --> 46:06.290
[SPEAKER_00]: Because the spiritual principle is still, yeah.

46:06.891 --> 46:07.251
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

46:07.271 --> 46:10.758
[SPEAKER_01]: And then something's just going to push one of our kids is just going to push a little too far.

46:10.778 --> 46:13.083
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to be going to react reactionary.

46:13.103 --> 46:15.567
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, and we just will, we default back to the flesh.

46:15.988 --> 46:17.531
[SPEAKER_01]: And so I think you're absolutely right.

46:17.551 --> 46:20.697
[SPEAKER_01]: It's not about just trying just a little bit harder.

46:20.677 --> 46:22.339
[SPEAKER_01]: You just got to lift a little bit heavier.

46:22.399 --> 46:24.742
[SPEAKER_01]: No, it's about abiding in Christ.

46:25.002 --> 46:26.064
[SPEAKER_00]: Consistency over time.

46:26.084 --> 46:39.460
[SPEAKER_01]: Like continually meditating on the Word of God and chewing on it, considering it, remembering it, and so in those moments when you trip over your words, you quickly like, oh wait a minute, no, I'm so sorry.

46:39.480 --> 46:39.841
[SPEAKER_01]: I did that.

46:39.921 --> 46:41.343
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, that's not who I want to be.

46:41.383 --> 46:43.225
[SPEAKER_01]: That's not who Christ is called me to be.

46:43.205 --> 46:51.726
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, um, I don't know if you've shared this before, but uh, you told me a story once about how people who train to look for counterfeit money.

46:51.746 --> 46:53.029
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh yeah.

46:53.049 --> 46:53.650
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you remember this?

46:53.711 --> 46:56.337
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, they don't, they don't train by looking at the fake thing.

46:56.452 --> 47:01.177
[SPEAKER_00]: They train themselves by looking at the real thing, and then anything that comes along, that's not the real thing.

47:01.257 --> 47:05.362
[SPEAKER_00]: They know so well, they know what the counterfeit is.

47:06.023 --> 47:09.327
[SPEAKER_00]: And I don't know why I just thought about that, but it's kind of like, we can't fake it.

47:09.587 --> 47:14.012
[SPEAKER_00]: Like, there's not gonna be a counterfeit fruit production in our life.

47:14.192 --> 47:17.316
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, I think what you said is us trying to do to our own strength.

47:17.396 --> 47:19.538
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's just be a little bit more patient than yesterday.

47:19.578 --> 47:23.623
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's just try and like add these little techniques to make us,

47:23.603 --> 47:29.497
[SPEAKER_01]: into the people we want is playing with the counterfeit rather than like let's rely on the Holy Spirit.

47:29.999 --> 47:31.121
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's surrender to him.

47:31.603 --> 47:34.129
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's repent of the of the counterfeit.

47:34.149 --> 47:36.334
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's repent of the way of being that we want to change.

47:37.638 --> 47:39.181
[SPEAKER_01]: That's a good analogy, brother.

47:39.262 --> 47:40.264
[SPEAKER_01]: I forgot about that one.

47:40.284 --> 47:41.106
[SPEAKER_01]: I like it.

47:41.086 --> 47:44.010
[SPEAKER_00]: Anything else you would add to answer that question?

47:44.130 --> 47:51.381
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, I just, good fruit, like we, the fruit of the spirit, it's, it's good, more kindness, more peace, more patience.

47:52.543 --> 47:56.448
[SPEAKER_01]: It's something that you and I both desperately desire more of in our homes.

47:56.508 --> 47:56.989
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, you see.

47:57.009 --> 47:58.451
[SPEAKER_01]: Like our kids will benefit from that.

47:59.293 --> 48:01.075
[SPEAKER_01]: Our relationship, our friendships.

48:01.416 --> 48:06.503
[SPEAKER_01]: So I don't think there's any lack of benefit in growing in fruit.

48:07.073 --> 48:08.716
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, your guys is challenged for the week.

48:08.736 --> 48:27.225
[SPEAKER_00]: It's kind of a funny one, but because we so much focused on fruit, we just want you to grab your favorite fruit and as you're eating it, just commit to praying, pray for you, pray for your spouse, and ask the Lord to transform you guys that you would see, that increase in fruitfulness that you desire.

48:27.813 --> 48:30.096
[SPEAKER_01]: I like fruit.

48:30.116 --> 48:30.897
[SPEAKER_01]: I haven't had any well.

48:31.879 --> 48:34.002
[SPEAKER_00]: What would you grab for your favorite fruit?

48:34.022 --> 48:35.865
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, for my favorite fruit.

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[SPEAKER_01]: I do like apples.

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[SPEAKER_01]: I love pineapple.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Pineapple is good.

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[SPEAKER_01]: And there's some special pineapple, because it's like special.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I'm like a banana strawberry.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, strawberries.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Strawberries are berries.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, we're getting off the engine.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Our bananas berries, too.

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[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to bring too many questions.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Someone's going to comment.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Let me know if a banana is a berry.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Dear Lord, we just come before you right now.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We just thank you so much for your word, your holy word, that leads us.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We thank you for your holy spirit that convicts our hearts and also reminds us of the things that you've said and teaches us and helps us navigate the hard things and the hard things.

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[SPEAKER_00]: God, we just pray for the marriages listening right now.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We pray that you would just remind them of the importance of your order and how you've designed and created marriage with order.

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[SPEAKER_00]: We pray that we would understand our roles and responsibilities and privileges when it comes to leading.

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[SPEAKER_00]: and submitting and loving each other well.

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[SPEAKER_00]: And I pray for every couple listening right now, Laura, that you would bless them, that you would give them the courage to operate within their roles.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Regardless of what their spouse is doing, and I pray that that just sets in a powerful example of love that.

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[SPEAKER_00]: motivates their spouse and just points both of their hearts back to you.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you, Jesus, for your example.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Throughout scriptures, everything that you've done for us that shows us the way, and we just pray that every day, we would be intentional to abide in you, and Jesus' name, we pray.

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[SPEAKER_00]: Amen.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Amen.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Thank you for joining us on week 25 of our 30 week marriage devotional series.

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[SPEAKER_01]: We'll have you all.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Have you next time.

