WEBVTT 00:00.031 --> 00:01.233 [SPEAKER_04]: I have a confession to make. 00:01.433 --> 00:02.274 [SPEAKER_04]: I've lost the plot. 00:02.455 --> 00:03.336 [SPEAKER_04]: I've missed the point. 00:03.376 --> 00:14.853 [SPEAKER_04]: The search for meaning can become so easily distorted in all that our society has labeled as meaningful, but actually leads us into meaninglessness. 00:14.873 --> 00:19.580 [SPEAKER_04]: All of the gifts I've ever received in my heart and in my soul have come from slowing down. 00:19.700 --> 00:24.908 [SPEAKER_04]: All the wisdom I have ever heard has sat with me in the sweet space of deep sun. 00:24.888 --> 00:30.935 [SPEAKER_04]: and all knowings I've ever inherited have been delivered to me in the most deep patience. 00:31.315 --> 00:38.103 [SPEAKER_04]: So when I rush and when I fix and when I long to understand, I must ask myself, am I missing the point? 00:38.123 --> 00:40.586 [SPEAKER_04]: And I must admit that, yes, I am. 00:40.606 --> 00:47.233 [SPEAKER_04]: Do you find yourself addicted to the buzz of feeling important to the craze of what's next? 00:47.213 --> 00:54.687 [SPEAKER_04]: To hoping that something comes along for you to look forward to you, and then realizing it is so much better in the fantasy of your head. 00:54.887 --> 01:03.943 [SPEAKER_04]: You are here to feel safe and trusting in it, present enough, to pause, to land, and to unravel your very existence at the feet of something loving. 01:07.770 --> 01:09.373 [SPEAKER_00]: But you are awakening already. 01:10.045 --> 01:14.731 [SPEAKER_00]: It's already happening, but that's why you're here and why you're listening. 01:15.332 --> 01:26.587 [SPEAKER_02]: Nothing is broken in your world, nothing needs to be changed, nothing needs to be different, and yet everything is constantly changing, because it is the inevitable nature of that which is eternal. 01:26.607 --> 01:31.533 [SPEAKER_04]: What have come to realize in this endless search and for answers is that they really are not. 01:31.553 --> 01:35.679 [SPEAKER_01]: If you spend your whole life trying to get your act together then what do you have? 01:35.879 --> 01:39.664 [SPEAKER_01]: You have an act. 01:39.982 --> 01:43.967 [SPEAKER_04]: Hello, everyone, and welcome back to Figuring Shit. 01:44.688 --> 01:47.232 [SPEAKER_04]: Out, my name is Vanessa Fontana, I'm your host. 01:47.292 --> 02:01.872 [SPEAKER_04]: And if you're new here, Figuring Shit Out is a brave, intentional space designed for creative, authentic, expressive, living, it is meant to help you deepen into the present moment to remember more of yourself. 02:01.852 --> 02:08.705 [SPEAKER_04]: to real wake in in a world that is so, so asleep and allow yourself to live with an open heart. 02:09.106 --> 02:09.827 [SPEAKER_04]: Welcome back. 02:09.907 --> 02:12.131 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm so excited for this episode. 02:12.171 --> 02:14.355 [SPEAKER_04]: We're going to get into it really, really quickly. 02:14.375 --> 02:15.197 [SPEAKER_04]: It's juicy. 02:15.217 --> 02:15.678 [SPEAKER_04]: It's good. 02:15.718 --> 02:21.649 [SPEAKER_04]: It is all about something that so many of us long to have the point, the purpose. 02:21.629 --> 02:23.835 [SPEAKER_04]: Okay, what's the meaning of life? 02:24.476 --> 02:30.673 [SPEAKER_04]: This question is something that follows us around and looks at us inside of every nook in cranny. 02:30.713 --> 02:34.382 [SPEAKER_04]: We try to hide from it in and yet we never seem to escape it. 02:34.423 --> 02:38.052 [SPEAKER_04]: It's like this existential dread that we all have felt or 02:38.032 --> 02:43.358 [SPEAKER_04]: feel and it comes from a looking for the meaning and all the wrong places. 02:43.758 --> 02:56.472 [SPEAKER_04]: We're going to get into it today, ways that you might be doing this in your life, ways to peel back, to come back, to remember the points, to come back to the truth, but then our hearts, it is a reminder, a reflection. 02:56.552 --> 02:58.134 [SPEAKER_04]: I just thank you for being part of it. 02:58.414 --> 03:05.862 [SPEAKER_04]: But before we begin, I want to say thank you so, so 03:05.842 --> 03:07.926 [SPEAKER_04]: You know what, even if you're not, even if you're new here. 03:08.166 --> 03:08.847 [SPEAKER_04]: Hey, welcome. 03:09.148 --> 03:09.849 [SPEAKER_04]: I love to have you. 03:09.869 --> 03:11.412 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm so glad that you're here. 03:11.472 --> 03:12.934 [SPEAKER_04]: Let me know that you're here. 03:12.994 --> 03:14.096 [SPEAKER_04]: Leave a comment. 03:14.116 --> 03:14.677 [SPEAKER_04]: Say hi. 03:14.717 --> 03:19.245 [SPEAKER_04]: The comments that you guys leave, they bring the most joy to me. 03:19.265 --> 03:21.489 [SPEAKER_04]: This is the best way to support the show. 03:21.669 --> 03:27.800 [SPEAKER_04]: If figuring it out has ever, and I mean ever, ever impacted your life, ever made you smile on a sad day. 03:27.880 --> 03:29.723 [SPEAKER_04]: If it has ever provided you with any value, 03:29.703 --> 03:30.164 [SPEAKER_04]: at all. 03:30.284 --> 03:30.705 [SPEAKER_04]: Consider. 03:30.765 --> 03:32.990 [SPEAKER_04]: Consider leaving a comment. 03:33.030 --> 03:33.712 [SPEAKER_04]: Just say hi. 03:33.732 --> 03:35.336 [SPEAKER_04]: I love seeing them. 03:36.057 --> 03:38.062 [SPEAKER_04]: I really, really appreciate them. 03:38.122 --> 03:39.886 [SPEAKER_04]: And this is the best way to engage with the show. 03:39.926 --> 03:44.917 [SPEAKER_04]: If you want to go the extra mile, rate the show on your preferred streaming platform, but very special invitation. 03:44.937 --> 03:46.260 [SPEAKER_04]: I am launching. 03:46.240 --> 04:05.970 [SPEAKER_04]: a creative community, a sanctuary, a space, a membership, a place that you can rest, your heart, your mind, your soul, your creativity, can flourish, your inner child, can be held, your shadows and your fears and the things that you know are holding you back can be addressed. 04:05.950 --> 04:08.013 [SPEAKER_04]: It is called Metamorphosis. 04:08.374 --> 04:24.621 [SPEAKER_04]: I have started Metamorphosis because I see that in our society, we are a culture that longs and yearns to create, yet we feel constantly oppressed by consumption and distraction and all of the fears that live within us and also the disconnection from ourselves and from each other. 04:24.681 --> 04:31.553 [SPEAKER_04]: Metamorphosis is a place where we can address all of those things come together meet people who are just like us. 04:31.533 --> 04:52.174 [SPEAKER_04]: see ourselves within them and allow this flourishing, this beautiful metamorphosis to happen and metamorphosis consists of weekly live and recorded, they'll always be recorded, artist hours, breath work, meditation, somatic work, all to lead us into creative flow state and then shadow workshops where we will go deep and dive into the 04:52.154 --> 05:01.622 [SPEAKER_04]: fears, the shadows that we have, the things that hold us back and keep us away from the depth of ourselves, from knowing ourselves, from being who we are meant to be in this life. 05:01.762 --> 05:14.614 [SPEAKER_04]: It has an entire library of practices, breath works, meditations, workshops, immediately as soon as you get inside that you can listen to like little podcast episodes, but their video workshops as well. 05:15.074 --> 05:20.659 [SPEAKER_04]: So you can immediately dive into learning more about your creative channel and 05:20.639 --> 05:32.224 [SPEAKER_04]: seen and all of these things that so many of us struggle with starting all together with a 10 day meditation journey on the inner child and creative awakening will only be available to founding members. 05:32.284 --> 05:36.353 [SPEAKER_04]: The founding members spots are already half full and founding members. 05:36.333 --> 05:39.276 [SPEAKER_04]: They get a discounted rate for life. 05:39.396 --> 05:44.180 [SPEAKER_04]: So even if you leave more emphasis and you come back, you will get the same rate for life. 05:44.280 --> 05:49.145 [SPEAKER_04]: Even as the price of menoriffs is goes up, as the library grows and as it launches to the public. 05:49.285 --> 05:54.670 [SPEAKER_04]: If you want further deeper details, then you can DM me over Instagram, say hi. 05:54.710 --> 05:55.831 [SPEAKER_04]: So you listen to the episode. 05:55.851 --> 05:58.733 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm going to send you a gift when you do a little mini meditation. 05:58.773 --> 06:01.776 [SPEAKER_04]: That will kind of allow you to see what's inside a metamorphosis. 06:02.416 --> 06:06.340 [SPEAKER_04]: And all send you a sign-up link without further ado. 06:06.320 --> 06:13.292 [SPEAKER_04]: I have a confession to make and this is a confession that I've made before so many times before. 06:13.352 --> 06:25.131 [SPEAKER_04]: It's actually the underpinning principle behind this show and I think it's something that so many people failed to see and failed to confess in their lives and here's what it is. 06:25.452 --> 06:27.315 [SPEAKER_04]: Listen, listen very carefully. 06:27.295 --> 06:28.297 [SPEAKER_04]: I've lost the plot. 06:28.457 --> 06:43.042 [SPEAKER_04]: I've missed the point and now I confess this from a place of having remembered the plot and having re-found the point even if ever so subtly because the moment that you realize I've lost the plot, I've missed the point. 06:43.222 --> 06:47.329 [SPEAKER_04]: You begin to reorient yourself back into this plot. 06:47.748 --> 06:48.289 [SPEAKER_04]: this point. 06:48.630 --> 06:52.598 [SPEAKER_04]: Which is something that we spend so much of our lives looking for. 06:53.399 --> 06:59.151 [SPEAKER_04]: It's something that we spend so much time working towards when really we can't define it. 06:59.411 --> 07:02.297 [SPEAKER_04]: And this is actually how this show ended up starting. 07:02.517 --> 07:02.938 [SPEAKER_04]: I 07:02.918 --> 07:22.041 [SPEAKER_04]: Got to my important job selling AI software to men and suits and building sales infrastructure for a company that was far beyond my conceptual understanding until I had to learn how to communicate it to the world. 07:22.021 --> 07:29.892 [SPEAKER_04]: Lots of responsibility for a 22-year-old girl made me feel very, very important, but at the same time I didn't know what the hell that I was doing. 07:29.932 --> 07:36.420 [SPEAKER_04]: I took a look around me and I saw everyone else and all these people, they all wore this title of importance. 07:36.480 --> 07:43.430 [SPEAKER_04]: They all wore this badge of, here's what I do, here's who I am, and here's what I lead with in the world. 07:43.550 --> 07:47.355 [SPEAKER_04]: Here's my identity before I ever even tell you anything true about myself. 07:47.375 --> 07:48.957 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm going to tell you all of these things that, 07:48.937 --> 07:56.268 [SPEAKER_04]: I believe to be true that are essentially what I'm leading with so that, you know, you see me as this person and this is who I am in the world. 07:56.328 --> 07:58.651 [SPEAKER_04]: This is the identity that I'm leading with. 07:58.831 --> 08:05.781 [SPEAKER_04]: And in these people with these identities, I thought I was going to find some type of answer. 08:05.801 --> 08:12.211 [SPEAKER_04]: I thought that when I got to quote unquote the real world, the purpose was going to be revealed. 08:12.251 --> 08:14.053 [SPEAKER_04]: The plot was going to be revealed. 08:14.414 --> 08:16.497 [SPEAKER_04]: The point was going to be revealed. 08:16.477 --> 08:20.280 [SPEAKER_04]: And I saw very, very quickly that that just wasn't the case. 08:20.320 --> 08:22.943 [SPEAKER_04]: It looked around, I realized no one knows what the hell they're doing. 08:23.043 --> 08:23.884 [SPEAKER_04]: This is not the point. 08:23.924 --> 08:24.804 [SPEAKER_04]: This is not the purpose. 08:24.904 --> 08:26.326 [SPEAKER_04]: I know it, I know it deepened my soul. 08:26.806 --> 08:37.035 [SPEAKER_04]: So I need to go find a way to reconcile this deep knowing within me while still making the living and while still figuring out how to do this thing called adulthood. 08:37.295 --> 08:39.117 [SPEAKER_04]: And so on the side I started figuring it out. 08:39.477 --> 08:44.762 [SPEAKER_04]: And figuring it out is a space where I explored what it meant to be someone. 08:44.742 --> 08:51.471 [SPEAKER_04]: who felt like they were always, always figuring shit out and knew that that wasn't the point or the purpose. 08:51.791 --> 09:00.783 [SPEAKER_04]: Thus, taking the whole journey of figuring shit out and actually giving meaning to it by looking at meaninglessness in the face. 09:01.243 --> 09:08.893 [SPEAKER_04]: And so much of what we call important in our lives, in our society, the things that we worship, the things that we put, 09:08.873 --> 09:14.484 [SPEAKER_04]: on a pedestal are the things we know at the end of the day are meaningless. 09:15.125 --> 09:31.877 [SPEAKER_04]: Even something like achieving a certain amount of financial means in order to achieve a certain sense of prosperity and lived wellness in your life, even that if done from an empty place, if done from a perpetually seeking place is meaningless. 09:31.857 --> 09:48.583 [SPEAKER_04]: Even looking for love, even wanting a relationship that makes us feel good and whole, and like we are someone, if done from that place, of using that endeavor to feel like we are someone, it will be meaningless. 09:48.563 --> 09:53.469 [SPEAKER_04]: And so, I've come to you today with this confession. 09:53.529 --> 10:00.116 [SPEAKER_04]: I've lost the plot and I've been feeding into the meaninglessness and I feel that this is where the show always comes back to. 10:00.176 --> 10:04.121 [SPEAKER_04]: It's where it always will because this is what it was founded upon. 10:04.301 --> 10:08.906 [SPEAKER_04]: It was founded upon me looking around and going, none of this should even matter. 10:09.867 --> 10:11.449 [SPEAKER_04]: So what does? 10:11.429 --> 10:15.132 [SPEAKER_04]: And that's really what figuring shit out is, at the end of the day, it's an exploration of what does. 10:15.633 --> 10:24.882 [SPEAKER_04]: And in order to open this episode, to really allow us to dive in to this question, are you perpetually missing the point? 10:25.542 --> 10:26.863 [SPEAKER_04]: And if so, let's come back. 10:27.124 --> 10:29.966 [SPEAKER_04]: Let's remind you of what is real, what exists. 10:31.308 --> 10:32.289 [SPEAKER_04]: I have written something. 10:32.329 --> 10:34.571 [SPEAKER_04]: It's very short, not too long. 10:34.611 --> 10:39.175 [SPEAKER_04]: That captures this sentiment. 10:39.155 --> 10:45.726 [SPEAKER_04]: All of the gifts I've ever received in my heart and in my soul have come from slowing down. 10:47.188 --> 10:54.401 [SPEAKER_04]: All the wisdom I have ever heard has sat with me in the sweet space of deep silence. 10:56.083 --> 11:04.217 [SPEAKER_04]: And all knowings I've ever inherited have been delivered to me in the most deep patience. 11:05.463 --> 11:13.553 [SPEAKER_04]: So when I rush and when I fix and when I long to understand, I must ask myself, am I missing the point? 11:14.475 --> 11:16.978 [SPEAKER_04]: And I must admit that, yes, I am. 11:17.018 --> 11:24.427 [SPEAKER_04]: The point is the point that wants to find me. 11:25.048 --> 11:27.731 [SPEAKER_04]: The point is the point that points to purpose. 11:28.673 --> 11:34.440 [SPEAKER_04]: The point is the point that leads its arrow to the north star of truth. 11:34.420 --> 11:44.349 [SPEAKER_04]: and how often are you, too, part of this society that rushes and fixes and longs to understand, perpetually missing the point. 11:44.649 --> 11:51.075 [SPEAKER_04]: Do you find yourself addicted to the buzz of feeling important to the craze of what's next? 11:51.615 --> 12:04.427 [SPEAKER_04]: To hoping that something comes along for you to look forward to and then realizing in the moment that what you've looked forward to comes, it was so much better 12:04.407 --> 12:10.714 [SPEAKER_04]: Are you clogging your heart unintentionally unknowingly with all that feels essential? 12:11.756 --> 12:19.885 [SPEAKER_04]: Work in life and the demands of a schedule that can't keep up with itself while never ceasing to make you feel too busy to breathe deep. 12:21.067 --> 12:31.579 [SPEAKER_04]: Have you noticed that the daffodils are out and that they won't be much longer have you seen that the tulips have come into a full bloom? 12:33.280 --> 12:35.182 [SPEAKER_04]: and do you know that they will soon wither away? 12:35.242 --> 12:46.236 [SPEAKER_04]: Have you seen the trees turn green this spring, day by day, laboring, and producing the fruit that they discovered in their winter patients? 12:47.458 --> 12:49.701 [SPEAKER_04]: Are you living a frantic and disordered life? 12:50.782 --> 12:54.006 [SPEAKER_04]: One that feels like you're chasing a plot that just never comes? 12:55.538 --> 13:03.546 [SPEAKER_04]: My darling, I have news for you, and this news comes directly from the mouth of the point. 13:05.428 --> 13:21.023 [SPEAKER_04]: You are here to feel safe enough, trusting enough, present enough, to pause, to land, and 13:23.433 --> 13:26.116 [SPEAKER_04]: Let's just take a deep breath in together. 13:26.237 --> 13:27.058 [SPEAKER_04]: Why don't we? 13:27.098 --> 13:30.462 [SPEAKER_04]: Why don't we take a deep breath in to the schedule that never allows it? 13:30.562 --> 13:32.885 [SPEAKER_04]: Come on deep breath in through the belly. 13:32.925 --> 13:37.832 [SPEAKER_04]: Let your belly expand wherever you are you can do this. 13:38.613 --> 13:38.893 [SPEAKER_04]: Yes. 13:41.276 --> 13:42.758 [SPEAKER_04]: Let's let it go with a big sigh. 13:44.155 --> 13:44.676 [SPEAKER_04]: the point. 13:46.078 --> 13:55.350 [SPEAKER_04]: In this piece I sort of personified the point because it's something that seems like this vacuous and endless search that we go on. 13:55.370 --> 13:56.872 [SPEAKER_04]: We look for the point of life. 13:56.912 --> 13:57.953 [SPEAKER_04]: We look for the purpose. 13:57.993 --> 14:07.986 [SPEAKER_04]: We look for this big old meaning when really the point and if we think about 14:07.966 --> 14:13.153 [SPEAKER_04]: It points to something, it's purpose is not to be the thing itself. 14:13.233 --> 14:25.729 [SPEAKER_04]: What I'm saying is that the search for meaning can become so easily distorted and all that our society has labeled as meaningful, but actually leads us into meaninglessness. 14:27.811 --> 14:29.113 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm going to pause there for a second. 14:30.376 --> 14:36.123 [SPEAKER_04]: These things that our society has deemed as meaningful, but actually lead us deeper into meaninglessness. 14:36.143 --> 14:56.367 [SPEAKER_04]: And this is a conversation that I found myself having in the last week a lot, because it's been about a year and a half since I ended up leaving that job that drove me to go search for actual meaning, to go search for the point to start figuring shit out, to pursue a creative life, to pursue what I had always known deep in my heart, 14:56.347 --> 14:58.051 [SPEAKER_04]: was what I was meant to do. 14:58.371 --> 15:06.468 [SPEAKER_04]: And what I had done was end up inevitably getting lost, getting lost and trying to find the plot, trying to find the thing. 15:06.508 --> 15:13.984 [SPEAKER_04]: And the thing that was never supposed to teach me it, the thing that society and the world around me deemed as important and successful. 15:13.964 --> 15:32.783 [SPEAKER_04]: which was a certain level of income at a certain age, a certain resume of impressive things that I could go and tout the world, a certain set of identities that I could carry with me, that really at the end of the day, left me feeling so empty, left me feeling like I didn't know what the hell I was doing, but left me leading. 15:32.763 --> 15:49.540 [SPEAKER_04]: into the world, a lie, a lie that I did, a lie that, you know, if I could just pretend if I could sit here with all my colleagues and talk a big game and bullshit my way through these corporate meetings, then I was someone, or at least I could convince them I was someone, at least I could convince the world, I was someone. 15:49.520 --> 15:52.967 [SPEAKER_04]: but that ultimately always left me feeling like I didn't know who I was. 15:53.027 --> 15:55.472 [SPEAKER_04]: And I've been talking to a lot of people recently. 15:55.512 --> 16:09.300 [SPEAKER_04]: I've had three conversations in the last week with women who are in this exact situation of working a job that they hate that ultimately provides them a sense of meaninglessness and craving, yearning for something else. 16:09.280 --> 16:28.318 [SPEAKER_04]: And I think that this distortion lies inside of this, this distortion that inside of your search for purpose, you're going to have everything you've ever wanted, and you just need to find your purpose, and if you don't have your purpose, well, then something might be wrong with you, or you're failing. 16:28.298 --> 16:35.908 [SPEAKER_04]: And that's another lie that society is handing over and I know a lot of you look at me and you go I want to do that. 16:36.128 --> 16:36.709 [SPEAKER_04]: I want to do it. 16:36.749 --> 16:37.370 [SPEAKER_04]: She's doing. 16:37.390 --> 16:42.897 [SPEAKER_04]: I want to find my meaning in my purpose and go forth into the world Brasin and Bolden do it. 16:42.937 --> 16:53.030 [SPEAKER_04]: I want to quit my job and go start the creative life of my dreams I want to do all of this and I want to ask you if that's you Why? 16:53.070 --> 16:54.272 [SPEAKER_04]: Truly why? 16:55.585 --> 16:56.669 [SPEAKER_04]: What do you think it's going to give you? 16:56.729 --> 17:02.811 [SPEAKER_04]: What do you feel that you're going to attain there that you can't or don't have in your life now? 17:04.833 --> 17:07.036 [SPEAKER_04]: And I say this very honestly. 17:07.056 --> 17:13.503 [SPEAKER_04]: I say this with a deep intention and invitation to just ask yourself that. 17:14.484 --> 17:20.792 [SPEAKER_04]: Do you really want it because you know in your heart that that's really what you are here for? 17:21.192 --> 17:26.959 [SPEAKER_04]: Because you've been told and given this beautiful 17:26.939 --> 17:32.735 [SPEAKER_04]: beautiful gift that you need to go explore and you know you have an ink link at least of what it is. 17:32.755 --> 17:34.399 [SPEAKER_04]: Or do you want that? 17:35.121 --> 17:39.092 [SPEAKER_04]: Because you think that freedom exists there where it doesn't in your own life. 17:40.675 --> 17:46.027 [SPEAKER_04]: Do you want that because you wanna be able to tell that story? 17:46.047 --> 17:47.952 [SPEAKER_04]: I quit my job. 17:48.152 --> 17:48.874 [SPEAKER_04]: I did this thing. 17:49.034 --> 17:52.662 [SPEAKER_04]: Oh, and trust me, I know that that story is addictive. 17:53.384 --> 17:56.251 [SPEAKER_04]: Is that desire from a place of survival? 17:56.391 --> 17:59.899 [SPEAKER_04]: Is it from a place of wanting to escape where you are? 17:59.879 --> 18:04.845 [SPEAKER_04]: because what I've learned from this journey in being someone who wanted to escape where it was. 18:04.905 --> 18:15.539 [SPEAKER_04]: Even though I did equally want to lead into something new and I knew what that new thing was, it was equal parts escape and equal parts purpose. 18:15.960 --> 18:25.752 [SPEAKER_04]: And that 50% escape drove my life for probably the eight to nine months following that decision. 18:25.732 --> 18:32.761 [SPEAKER_04]: So because there was a lot of survival, a lot of fear that managed us to so deeply into that transition. 18:32.821 --> 18:46.980 [SPEAKER_04]: And I tell this story because I want you to see and I want you to know that the ideal of freedom that you have oftentimes is an ideal that we create in our mind. 18:46.960 --> 18:52.890 [SPEAKER_04]: It is looking at someone and going, I want that because you see what they're presenting to you. 18:52.970 --> 18:56.196 [SPEAKER_04]: You see the ego, you see the identity behind it. 18:56.556 --> 19:02.927 [SPEAKER_04]: And that is exactly how we end up searching for meaning and the meaninglessness. 19:02.907 --> 19:05.593 [SPEAKER_04]: That is exactly how we end up going. 19:05.773 --> 19:09.260 [SPEAKER_04]: I thought that this would make me happy and it doesn't. 19:09.761 --> 19:16.436 [SPEAKER_04]: And if this doesn't, this thing that I thought was it isn't it, then what the hell is. 19:16.696 --> 19:19.482 [SPEAKER_04]: And then that's where we start getting really existential. 19:19.462 --> 19:21.143 [SPEAKER_04]: Okay, I have all the money. 19:21.163 --> 19:22.905 [SPEAKER_04]: I have all the success. 19:23.565 --> 19:26.208 [SPEAKER_04]: I have deep and nourishing friendships. 19:26.528 --> 19:27.689 [SPEAKER_04]: I have a relationship. 19:28.109 --> 19:29.531 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm still not happy with myself. 19:29.631 --> 19:30.471 [SPEAKER_04]: I still don't feel free. 19:30.491 --> 19:35.616 [SPEAKER_04]: This actually all feels like a lot to keep going what now. 19:36.116 --> 19:49.047 [SPEAKER_04]: And I know a lot of us aren't there, so we think, okay, well, when I get the career in the success, when I get the relationship, when I get all of these areas in my life, fixed and solved and understood then. 19:49.027 --> 19:52.831 [SPEAKER_04]: Then I'll have found the point. 19:53.691 --> 19:55.113 [SPEAKER_04]: I'll be able to relax. 19:55.533 --> 20:08.265 [SPEAKER_04]: And I have news for you darling, if you can't relax now, if you can't sit at the feet of something loving that tells you that right now is the moment where the point is found, it's not then. 20:08.305 --> 20:14.331 [SPEAKER_04]: Right now is the moment where the point leads you into that piece. 20:15.653 --> 20:17.194 [SPEAKER_04]: You're not going to find it there. 20:17.174 --> 20:24.869 [SPEAKER_04]: And this is a product of our society, this is a product of the world that we live in, this distortion of freedom. 20:24.909 --> 20:32.905 [SPEAKER_04]: This idea of freedom that we've been sold is actually something that keeps us deeply enslaved. 20:32.885 --> 20:42.115 [SPEAKER_04]: in our hearts, in our minds, in our beings, it it partially thrives off of the desires that we have that come from an impure and unwhole place. 20:42.575 --> 20:50.523 [SPEAKER_04]: Yet we are too disconnected and numb to see that they're coming from an impure and unwhole place. 20:50.583 --> 20:59.753 [SPEAKER_04]: So with all of this being said, I want to read you a short 20:59.733 --> 21:07.633 [SPEAKER_04]: All about a fisherman, some of you might know this already, but this really captures the point, that points to the point. 21:08.812 --> 21:11.035 [SPEAKER_04]: If you're with me great, if you're not, just ignore that. 21:11.155 --> 21:15.382 [SPEAKER_04]: There are once was a businessman who was sitting by the beach in a small Brazilian village. 21:16.063 --> 21:22.052 [SPEAKER_04]: As he sat, he saw a Brazilian fisherman rowing a small boat towards the shore, having caught quite a few big fish. 21:22.673 --> 21:27.860 [SPEAKER_04]: The businessman was impressed and asked the fisherman, how long does it take you to catch so many fish? 21:28.441 --> 21:34.150 [SPEAKER_04]: And the fisherman replied, oh, just a short while, then why don't you stay longer at sea and cut you even more? 21:34.190 --> 21:36.473 [SPEAKER_04]: The businessman was astonished. 21:36.824 --> 21:39.529 [SPEAKER_04]: This is enough to feed my whole family, the fishermen said. 21:39.569 --> 21:42.735 [SPEAKER_04]: And then the businessmen then asked, so what do you do for the rest of the day? 21:43.356 --> 21:53.574 [SPEAKER_04]: The fishermen replied, well, I usually wake up early in the morning, go out to see and catch a few fish, then go back and play with my kids and in the afternoon, I take a nap with my wife and evening comes. 21:53.875 --> 21:56.159 [SPEAKER_04]: I join my buddies on the village for a drink. 21:56.219 --> 21:58.984 [SPEAKER_04]: We play guitar, we sing, we dance throughout the night. 21:58.964 --> 22:02.611 [SPEAKER_04]: The businessman offered a suggestion to the fisherman. 22:03.433 --> 22:05.778 [SPEAKER_04]: I am a PhD in business management. 22:05.998 --> 22:07.160 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm a really important person. 22:07.822 --> 22:10.988 [SPEAKER_04]: I could help you to become a more successful person, just like me. 22:11.469 --> 22:15.658 [SPEAKER_04]: From now on, you should spend more time at sea and try to catch as many fish as possible. 22:15.698 --> 22:20.888 [SPEAKER_04]: When you've saved enough money, you could buy a bigger boat and catch even more fish, isn't that the dream? 22:20.935 --> 22:25.161 [SPEAKER_04]: Soon you will be able to afford to buy more boats because I know you want that. 22:25.502 --> 22:37.779 [SPEAKER_04]: Set up your own company, your own production plant for canned food and distribution at work, and by then, you will have moved out of this village to South Paulo where you can set up an HQ to manage your other branches. 22:38.039 --> 22:39.201 [SPEAKER_04]: Ah, doesn't that sound so good? 22:39.261 --> 22:45.390 [SPEAKER_04]: The fishermen continues, and after that, well, the businessman laughed very loudly and heartily. 22:45.370 --> 22:54.138 [SPEAKER_04]: After that, you can live like a king in your own house, and when the time is right, you can go public and float your shares in the stock exchange, and you will be rich. 22:55.139 --> 23:00.724 [SPEAKER_04]: The fisherman asks, and after that, and the businessman says, and after that, you can finally retire. 23:00.764 --> 23:03.346 [SPEAKER_04]: You can move to a house by the fishing village. 23:03.606 --> 23:13.555 [SPEAKER_04]: Wake up early in the morning, catch a few fish, then return home to play with the kids, have a nice afternoon nap with your wife, and when evening comes, you can join your buddies for a drink. 23:13.535 --> 23:16.084 [SPEAKER_04]: play the guitar sing and dance throughout the night. 23:17.047 --> 23:18.492 [SPEAKER_04]: The fisherman was puzzled. 23:19.736 --> 23:23.950 [SPEAKER_04]: And said to the businessman, isn't that what I'm doing now? 23:25.769 --> 23:26.951 [SPEAKER_04]: this endless chase. 23:27.212 --> 23:29.657 [SPEAKER_04]: So we're sold by that business man, right? 23:30.198 --> 23:39.176 [SPEAKER_04]: By that capitalistic hunger that egoic desire to achieve more, more, more, more. 23:39.276 --> 23:48.013 [SPEAKER_04]: So reach for the stars and to think that those stars are going to give you meaning and purpose. 23:49.597 --> 24:11.008 [SPEAKER_04]: When really, so much of us are so blessed to have what we have right now, so much of us are so unwilling to look inside the mirror of the moment and see within it, so much beauty, so much power, so much love waiting for us there. 24:11.048 --> 24:19.080 [SPEAKER_04]: And this whole idea, something I've been sitting with, because for me, it is so easy to get caught up in the doing, 24:19.060 --> 24:40.933 [SPEAKER_04]: And I am addicted to productivity, I am addicted to feeling like I'm making some type of meaning with my life through an external validating output through something like success through something like the pursuit of my purpose through something that gives me a worldly sense of I'm here and I'm doing something. 24:40.913 --> 25:03.259 [SPEAKER_04]: And I know a lot of us feel this restlessness in our lives, in our world, in a culture that basically bombards us with this idea that you need to be doing something, you need to be creative, and if you're not creative, well then there's something wrong with you, or if you can't connect to your creativity, well then there's something wrong with you, or if you haven't made a business by 25 and 25:03.239 --> 25:04.621 [SPEAKER_04]: stacked some millions. 25:04.681 --> 25:17.441 [SPEAKER_04]: There's something wrong with you and I've really deconstructed this entire idea in the last six or seven months because it's something that I was really falling for for a while really buying into when I quit my job. 25:17.461 --> 25:23.070 [SPEAKER_04]: I think I had this unrealistic expectation that immediately I was going to just be the most 25:23.050 --> 25:40.392 [SPEAKER_04]: famous podcast house in the world and that figured she was gonna blow up and that everything was gonna be amazing, but realistically, I had so much inner work to do as a result of doing it from this impure and honestly on whole plays, so kind of just wanting to escape my situation. 25:40.412 --> 25:48.703 [SPEAKER_04]: And I'm saying that with the honesty of knowing that there was truth in there, there was purpose in there, there was meaning and beauty in there, but it was so hard. 25:48.683 --> 25:57.894 [SPEAKER_04]: For me to see that I had everything I needed and wanted because the business man He was talking as talk and I was buying it. 25:58.014 --> 25:58.795 [SPEAKER_04]: I was like, you know what? 25:58.995 --> 26:11.130 [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, I do need to Buy a bigger boat and catch more fish and then have a holding company Also that I can do the thing that I'm doing right now 26:11.110 --> 26:17.302 [SPEAKER_04]: my partner, he's a musician, fellow artist, and we talk a lot about this. 26:17.362 --> 26:31.549 [SPEAKER_04]: The difference between your job and your income, and this is something I'm going to get into very, very deeply inside of my new creative sanctuary, Metamorphosis, which is all about nurturing the inner artist, the inner creative in you. 26:31.529 --> 26:38.822 [SPEAKER_04]: from a whole place while also facing the fear and the survival that might come up when you go and you explore and you excavate these parts of you. 26:38.862 --> 26:52.486 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm going to be talking about this a lot inside of Metamorphosis because a lot of people want to quit their job and do something creative and yes, yes and you should, but we do have to make money in this world. 26:52.607 --> 26:54.550 [SPEAKER_04]: That is a big part of it and a lot of times 26:54.530 --> 27:14.445 [SPEAKER_04]: our need to make money then eclipses the desire to do something purposeful and also can eclips the purposeful work that we're doing because then we need it in order to live and then we get addicted to if we experience some success the money and we forget the art we forget the purpose and so it's 27:14.425 --> 27:17.411 [SPEAKER_04]: really about staying true within what is your job? 27:17.451 --> 27:31.978 [SPEAKER_04]: And when I say job, listen to episode 129, which is all about uncovering your divine assignment, understanding what it is that you really were brought here to do, what are the marching orders that you and only you were given? 27:31.958 --> 27:38.507 [SPEAKER_04]: and how to listen, how to hear those, because we all have that, we do all have that, and it's different for all of us. 27:38.587 --> 27:55.772 [SPEAKER_04]: And if you find yourself always looking and listening to the noise of the world, you will never really be able to find it because that is found inside of presence, stillness, purpose, creation, flow, and that is the energy that we tap into inside of 27:55.752 --> 27:58.254 [SPEAKER_04]: And inside and out of more of us says, I'll finish this thought now. 27:58.655 --> 28:07.142 [SPEAKER_04]: We're going to be talking about the difference between your job, your divine assignment, what you were brought to this earth to do and your income, because there are two different things. 28:07.683 --> 28:12.667 [SPEAKER_04]: And ideally, in our ideal world, they become the same thing. 28:12.687 --> 28:14.949 [SPEAKER_04]: We work to allow them to become the same thing. 28:14.969 --> 28:19.453 [SPEAKER_04]: But if we force them to be the same thing right away, we lose our job. 28:19.513 --> 28:25.759 [SPEAKER_04]: We don't do a good job at the thing that is our job. 28:25.739 --> 28:52.253 [SPEAKER_04]: In this life, as far as I understand it, is creating a safe space for people to explore themselves and using the gifts of my words, my presence, the lessons that I've learned and garnered from my upbringing and from my particular life experience to create spaces where creation can happen, where people can move out of survival into self-expression. 28:52.233 --> 28:53.295 [SPEAKER_04]: That's my job. 28:53.756 --> 29:06.737 [SPEAKER_04]: So the day I die, I'm going to be doing that with the way that I am, the way that I live, the way that I go about this world, the way that I interact with every human, every stranger, everyone. 29:06.937 --> 29:07.659 [SPEAKER_04]: That's my job. 29:07.699 --> 29:09.381 [SPEAKER_04]: That's what I take with me, everywhere. 29:09.722 --> 29:10.984 [SPEAKER_04]: Your income. 29:10.964 --> 29:11.445 [SPEAKER_04]: different. 29:11.465 --> 29:13.788 [SPEAKER_04]: Your income is how you make money. 29:14.189 --> 29:16.853 [SPEAKER_04]: My income, it's related, but it's not all the way there. 29:16.873 --> 29:19.377 [SPEAKER_04]: My income is being a podcast host. 29:19.457 --> 29:26.727 [SPEAKER_04]: My income is creating advertisements for brands, not necessarily my passion or my job, but it is my income. 29:26.888 --> 29:35.200 [SPEAKER_04]: Income is different than job, and ideally you are able to pursue your income at a degree that allows you to then pursue your job, but 29:35.180 --> 29:36.763 [SPEAKER_04]: this is not what this conversation is about. 29:36.803 --> 29:44.099 [SPEAKER_04]: If you're interested in this, if you want to go deep into it, consider, oh, just consider signing up for a founding member spot in Metamorphosis. 29:44.339 --> 29:51.855 [SPEAKER_04]: If you're really curious about this, this is the exact type of thing we're going to be exploring, deconstructing, doing, and or work on inside of Metamorphosis. 29:51.835 --> 30:08.901 [SPEAKER_04]: all of this to say you can really lose the plot very quickly and very easily even if you are doing something that has to do with your purpose and these conversations that I've been having with other people are really around this idea that they're not happy because they don't have their purpose. 30:08.941 --> 30:09.422 [SPEAKER_04]: They don't 30:09.402 --> 30:17.951 [SPEAKER_04]: know what they're supposed to be doing in this life and because they're doing something that they obviously know is not the thing that their heart and soul sing in dance for. 30:17.991 --> 30:29.604 [SPEAKER_04]: They feel like a failure when really they have their income piece sorted out and that's a fucking win because girl I didn't for a whole long time when I was pursuing my job and my purpose. 30:29.724 --> 30:30.905 [SPEAKER_04]: They have one half of it. 30:31.326 --> 30:34.369 [SPEAKER_04]: The question is, is your income allowing you to do your job? 30:34.710 --> 30:38.734 [SPEAKER_04]: Is your income allowing you to act 30:38.714 --> 30:40.236 [SPEAKER_04]: fuel your purpose. 30:40.376 --> 30:43.721 [SPEAKER_04]: Is your income allowing you to have purpose or is it keeping you on that hamster wheel? 30:44.321 --> 30:47.485 [SPEAKER_04]: That perpetual cycle of there's always more to do. 30:47.525 --> 30:56.898 [SPEAKER_04]: There's always something we're doing and I feel really important doing it, but really underneath it is just an empty desire to be more than you already are when my darling you already are. 30:57.398 --> 31:01.043 [SPEAKER_04]: This really came to me this morning because as many of you know and as I've 31:01.023 --> 31:17.725 [SPEAKER_04]: been sharing I've been reading the Bible and exploring a lot of theology and deeply understanding Jesus, who Jesus was, what his role was, what he taught and I stopped at reading this passage that really had me by the throat for a second. 31:18.005 --> 31:28.819 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm going to read it to you and if you've had an experience with the Christian tradition or religion that when I talk about Jesus you immediately 31:28.799 --> 31:29.700 [SPEAKER_04]: not too long ago. 31:29.740 --> 31:50.731 [SPEAKER_04]: And as I have learned more and more about the spiritual heart of the truth within these teachings, the more that I see so much of the distortions that the world has done to these teachings, one of them being judgment, one of them being a sense of eternal damnation. 31:50.791 --> 31:55.718 [SPEAKER_04]: If one does not believe in a way that is really scary and really off-putting and 31:55.698 --> 32:14.888 [SPEAKER_04]: really not how you get people to learn okay so I just ask you to stay with me for a second while I read this because there is a point to be made that ties back to the whole episode okay so this basically shares about a story where Jesus and his disciples they're on their way to Jerusalem they're walking and they're like you know what I'm hungry like let's go stop into someone's house 32:14.868 --> 32:19.553 [SPEAKER_04]: Let's go eat something and they came to a village where two sisters lived in a house. 32:19.653 --> 32:21.274 [SPEAKER_04]: They were named Martha and Mary. 32:21.334 --> 32:29.182 [SPEAKER_04]: Martha invites Jesus and goes, come, come on in, have dinner with us, stay and so her and her sister welcome him in. 32:29.322 --> 32:30.784 [SPEAKER_04]: And Martha, she goes to cook dinner. 32:30.804 --> 32:31.945 [SPEAKER_04]: She goes to be a good host. 32:31.965 --> 32:33.787 [SPEAKER_04]: She goes to say, okay, Jesus, what do you need? 32:33.847 --> 32:36.129 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm going to go in the kitchen whip it up for you and Mary. 32:36.169 --> 32:41.054 [SPEAKER_04]: She sits at his feet and she listens to his teachings. 32:41.194 --> 32:42.816 [SPEAKER_04]: She just sits there and listens. 32:42.796 --> 32:47.148 [SPEAKER_04]: And Martha's in the kitchen, like, girl, can I get some help? 32:47.168 --> 32:48.371 [SPEAKER_04]: Like, what are you doing? 32:48.471 --> 32:49.033 [SPEAKER_04]: What are you doing? 32:49.073 --> 32:49.995 [SPEAKER_04]: Can I get some fucking help? 32:50.256 --> 32:56.012 [SPEAKER_04]: And so she tells Jesus, she's like, hey, doesn't it seem unfair to you that my sister sits here? 32:56.132 --> 32:58.358 [SPEAKER_04]: Well, I do all of the work. 32:58.338 --> 32:59.380 [SPEAKER_04]: Tell her to come and help me. 32:59.441 --> 33:00.644 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm in here sleeping away. 33:00.664 --> 33:08.823 [SPEAKER_04]: Okay, I'm trying to prepare our meal and she's just sitting here worshiping at your feet and Jesus says to her, my dear Martha, my dear. 33:08.923 --> 33:11.810 [SPEAKER_04]: You're worried and upset over all of these details. 33:12.973 --> 33:15.098 [SPEAKER_04]: Coconut up, open it up in the kitchen. 33:15.078 --> 33:31.095 [SPEAKER_04]: I'll care about that, girl, did you remember that I've fasted for 40 days, hunger, ain't nothing but a thing to me, and nothing but a thing to me, pursue it on a regular basis actually in order to fulfill my spiritual obligation to my father. 33:31.075 --> 33:55.210 [SPEAKER_04]: Um, so just to let you know, he says, I'm paraphrasing so much and I'm putting this in words that I would understand and that I hope you understand, but Jesus does not say any of that, this is, that's not in the Bible, I'm paraphrasing so much, but what he does say is this, my dear Martha, you're worried and upset over all of these details, there's only one thing worth being concerned about Mary discovered it and it will not be taken away from her. 33:56.675 --> 34:02.780 [SPEAKER_04]: And I read that, and I just felt myself so deeply inside of Martha. 34:02.801 --> 34:06.264 [SPEAKER_04]: I just think of how many times in my life, I am Martha. 34:06.304 --> 34:08.165 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm missing the plot, I'm missing the point. 34:08.205 --> 34:09.807 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm not looking up the sky when I'm walking. 34:09.867 --> 34:11.128 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm busy, I'm on my phone. 34:11.308 --> 34:18.094 [SPEAKER_04]: I'm making lists of lists of lists of lists when really it's like, all that's being asked of me is just to be in this moment. 34:18.234 --> 34:26.682 [SPEAKER_04]: And that is where I'll find it all because realistically, 34:26.662 --> 34:39.699 [SPEAKER_04]: Whether you're married, at Jesus' feet, listening to his teachings, looking up at him and adoration and just being like, wow, you have a lot of beautiful things to say, you have the truth and you, I need to know it and I need to hear it. 34:39.719 --> 34:54.778 [SPEAKER_04]: Or if you're Martha, who's sleeping away in the kitchen, thinking that she's doing something good, thinking that she is doing the right thing by creating a meal for Jesus to eat, like thinking that that's her best way of respecting him. 34:54.758 --> 35:07.371 [SPEAKER_04]: And all the while, that's out of details, need fear, the deeper desire there, the underlying desire is motivated from a place of worry. 35:07.391 --> 35:23.668 [SPEAKER_04]: And what he reveals to her is what's in Mary, this deep, total, and essential need of presence, the virtue of patience, the depth of listening and receiving, and that Martha 35:23.648 --> 35:35.530 [SPEAKER_04]: Martha was fooling herself into thinking that her deep and essential in total need was to do more, was to tend to all those little details, was to get it done, to get it right, to be good. 35:35.810 --> 35:42.021 [SPEAKER_04]: She was clogging her heart up with all of these little things that were so far from the purpose. 35:42.122 --> 35:44.526 [SPEAKER_04]: And the purpose was sitting right there. 35:44.506 --> 35:51.137 [SPEAKER_04]: that the truth was sitting right there and all the while she's trying to do all the things to appease the truth. 35:51.217 --> 35:56.166 [SPEAKER_04]: When the truth doesn't need appeasing, the truth is ready to be received at any moment. 35:56.767 --> 35:58.289 [SPEAKER_04]: This feels like a good place to end. 35:58.530 --> 36:08.927 [SPEAKER_04]: I just want to invite you to think about where are you Martha in your life and the greatest grandest question are you perpetually missing the point and in what ways do you miss the point? 36:08.907 --> 36:20.142 [SPEAKER_04]: what are your toxic traits and habits and how you don't look up at the sky when the sun is shining, your head down trying to solve or fix or understand something or do the thing that you think you need to do. 36:20.182 --> 36:23.106 [SPEAKER_04]: And this is not to say that your responsibilities are important. 36:23.126 --> 36:37.125 [SPEAKER_04]: I believe that responsibility is what gives us freedom, our ability to show up and do the thing that we don't want to do is oftentimes what allows us to be free from all the things that we don't want to be enslaved to. 36:37.105 --> 36:44.436 [SPEAKER_04]: more on that in another episode, but essentially how are you looking for freedom in the things that are actually keeping you enslaved? 36:44.556 --> 36:45.598 [SPEAKER_04]: So that's the question. 36:45.658 --> 36:47.861 [SPEAKER_04]: Those are the thoughts I'm going to leave you with. 36:48.502 --> 36:52.729 [SPEAKER_04]: I love you guys so much and I want to know what's on your heart. 36:53.209 --> 36:55.893 [SPEAKER_04]: What ways do you miss the plot? 36:55.913 --> 36:58.257 [SPEAKER_04]: Miss the point if you've made it this far in the episode? 36:58.317 --> 37:01.662 [SPEAKER_04]: Let me know with the comments 37:01.642 --> 37:16.506 [SPEAKER_04]: what ways you miss the point, miss the plot, and what ways you're going to start incorporating the plot in the point back into your life, even if it's something small, like taking your time in the morning or listening and receiving a little bit deeper, spending time and silence. 37:16.907 --> 37:17.568 [SPEAKER_04]: That's a big one. 37:17.608 --> 37:18.730 [SPEAKER_04]: That's a very hard for us. 37:18.810 --> 37:23.177 [SPEAKER_04]: If we are constantly on the move, in noise, we will miss. 37:23.157 --> 37:35.003 [SPEAKER_04]: The point is, if you are interested in metamorphosis, sign up for the waiting list below, you can even DM me on Instagram and if you DM me on Instagram saying you are excited about metamorphosis, you want to join it. 37:35.444 --> 37:37.128 [SPEAKER_04]: I have something free for you. 37:37.148 --> 37:41.959 [SPEAKER_04]: It is a little meditation that I'll gift to you just for... 37:41.939 --> 37:46.505 [SPEAKER_04]: Listening to the show, we're making it this far, and I'll tell you a little bit more about it. 37:46.525 --> 37:47.667 [SPEAKER_04]: We can chat about it there. 37:47.687 --> 37:58.401 [SPEAKER_04]: Essentially, Metamorphosis is a creative sanctuary designed to allow you to explore your creativity, your artistry, your expression, to feel grounded and safe and connected in your life as you do so. 37:58.441 --> 38:06.792 [SPEAKER_04]: We do weekly artist hours with breath and meditation and somatics and then creativity and play to get you into a flow state every single week. 38:06.872 --> 38:08.875 [SPEAKER_04]: And we also do shadow workshops designed, 38:08.855 --> 38:10.777 [SPEAKER_04]: to face fear. 38:10.817 --> 38:19.668 [SPEAKER_04]: There is an entire sanctuary of practices, meditations, workshops like connecting to your creative channel and overcoming the fear of being seen in meditations. 38:19.728 --> 38:22.351 [SPEAKER_04]: In our child healing work, creative awakening work. 38:22.411 --> 38:27.758 [SPEAKER_04]: This is the embodiment of everything I've ever done in a lived sanctuary. 38:27.858 --> 38:33.985 [SPEAKER_04]: Start altogether with a 10-day creative awakening and 38:33.965 --> 38:38.771 [SPEAKER_04]: So make sure that you express interest before half of the founding member spots are gone. 38:38.831 --> 38:40.933 [SPEAKER_04]: Founding members get access to everything first. 38:40.993 --> 38:44.137 [SPEAKER_04]: You get 25% off future retreats, which I will be doing. 38:44.157 --> 38:46.420 [SPEAKER_04]: I'll be doing another one later this year. 38:46.500 --> 38:47.561 [SPEAKER_04]: Stay tuned for that. 38:48.302 --> 38:52.447 [SPEAKER_04]: And you get a locked and discounted rate for life. 38:52.627 --> 38:53.668 [SPEAKER_04]: You are filling up fast. 38:53.748 --> 38:55.490 [SPEAKER_04]: And again, you can DM me on Instagram. 38:55.510 --> 38:57.393 [SPEAKER_04]: Just DM me and say I want to be a founding member. 38:57.493 --> 38:59.415 [SPEAKER_04]: I'll send you that meditation and we can chat. 38:59.395 --> 39:01.638 [SPEAKER_04]: Alright guys, I love you so so much. 39:01.878 --> 39:06.223 [SPEAKER_04]: Remember, if you spend your whole life trying to get your act together, you don't have a life. 39:06.764 --> 39:07.404 [SPEAKER_04]: You have an act. 39:08.025 --> 39:09.907 [SPEAKER_04]: So go and live your fucking life. 39:10.148 --> 39:14.312 [SPEAKER_04]: I love you so much, and I'll see you next week. 39:14.332 --> 39:16.094 [SPEAKER_03]: You gotta look for the redeeming feature. 39:16.114 --> 39:17.977 [SPEAKER_03]: You gotta look for things to appreciate. 39:18.037 --> 39:21.721 [SPEAKER_03]: You gotta find a reason to make it okay where you are. 39:22.722 --> 39:25.746 [SPEAKER_03]: Now, I've gotta strive and struggle and thrive. 39:26.226 --> 39:27.748 [SPEAKER_03]: That's what I've been taught. 39:28.117 --> 39:30.246 [SPEAKER_03]: Growth and expansion is my quest. 39:30.808 --> 39:33.278 [SPEAKER_03]: No, that's inevitable. 39:33.298 --> 39:35.848 [SPEAKER_03]: Whether it comes easier hard is the question. 39:36.098 --> 39:47.188 [SPEAKER_01]: horrible truth is that it's an inside job that if you're going to get that love and that respect that you just so lock that connect that union starts inside. 39:47.208 --> 39:57.077 [SPEAKER_04]: To every experience of growth there is an equal and an opposite and that equal and an opposite is what drives you to that light. 39:57.658 --> 40:05.565 [SPEAKER_04]: So you have to start and where it's you have to start first within yourself.