WEBVTT 00:00.823 --> 00:01.264 [SPEAKER_01]: marriage. 00:02.124 --> 00:08.431 [SPEAKER_01]: That's what we're going to be talking about today on this discipleship episode with me and my husband, Walt Gabbard. 00:08.832 --> 00:15.278 [SPEAKER_01]: You know, I've known for a long time that I need to do a discipleship episode on marriage and who better to do it within your spouse. 00:15.439 --> 00:21.425 [SPEAKER_01]: So I think today we should be able to uncover and answer a lot of the questions that you may have on marriage, typically. 00:21.925 --> 00:22.806 [SPEAKER_01]: And then also just 00:23.587 --> 00:31.554 [SPEAKER_00]: Help some people along on this journey that is married, I guess we can start on the original design of marriage, how God designed marriage to be. 00:31.614 --> 00:40.922 [SPEAKER_00]: It starts all the way back in Genesis chapter 2 verses 18 through 24 and the Lord God said it is not good for the man to be alone. 00:41.723 --> 00:48.349 [SPEAKER_00]: Now we'll make a helper suitable for him, now the Lord God had formed out of the ground, all the wild animals and all the birds in the sky. 00:49.346 --> 00:54.930 [SPEAKER_00]: He brought them to the man to see what he would name them and whatever the man called each living creature that was its name. 00:56.231 --> 01:00.273 [SPEAKER_00]: So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky and all the wild animals. 01:00.994 --> 01:03.436 [SPEAKER_00]: But for Adam, no suitable helper was found. 01:04.276 --> 01:12.762 [SPEAKER_00]: So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep and while he was sleeping he took one of the man's ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. 01:14.675 --> 01:19.419 [SPEAKER_00]: Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib you had taken out of the man and he brought her to the man. 01:19.920 --> 01:23.864 [SPEAKER_00]: The man said, this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. 01:24.484 --> 01:26.987 [SPEAKER_00]: She shall be called woman for she was taken out of man. 01:27.847 --> 01:33.252 [SPEAKER_00]: That is why man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife and they become one flesh. 01:33.993 --> 01:38.597 [SPEAKER_00]: And then Jesus brought after you know when he was on earth and Matthew, 01:39.670 --> 01:46.780 [SPEAKER_00]: They were having a conversation about and he said, haven't you read that at the beginning, the creator made them male and female. 01:47.060 --> 01:53.269 [SPEAKER_00]: And said, for this reason, a man will leave his father, mother, and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. 01:54.150 --> 01:56.253 [SPEAKER_00]: So they are no longer two, but one flesh. 01:57.335 --> 02:00.978 [SPEAKER_00]: Therefore, what God is joined together, let no one separate. 02:01.498 --> 02:05.181 [SPEAKER_00]: So the original design, Jesus Christ Himself backed it up, and what it is. 02:05.942 --> 02:06.843 [SPEAKER_00]: It's a good place to start. 02:07.063 --> 02:07.984 [SPEAKER_01]: So that was very clear. 02:08.764 --> 02:11.326 [SPEAKER_01]: In Genesis, and then like he said, Jesus backed it up. 02:11.366 --> 02:14.389 [SPEAKER_01]: When Jesus walked and taught on this earth, he backed that up. 02:14.529 --> 02:19.333 [SPEAKER_01]: That God's intention and original design is that one male and one female would come together. 02:19.813 --> 02:20.393 [SPEAKER_01]: and be married. 02:20.814 --> 02:24.015 [SPEAKER_01]: Now I know that a lot of people will try to justify different lifestyles. 02:24.335 --> 02:31.079 [SPEAKER_01]: This is just the way that we do in our humanity is to try to justify things that we won't in our carnival nature. 02:31.799 --> 02:37.882 [SPEAKER_01]: And there are a whole lot of people out there that are living outside of marriage, but still being active. 02:38.322 --> 02:47.404 [SPEAKER_01]: And then there's a lot of people that are making excuses for having multiple lives and just many things of defiling the marriage bed. 02:48.044 --> 02:55.046 [SPEAKER_01]: And this is a part of our world today, but it has always been a part even in the Bible you can read where this has always been a thing. 02:55.706 --> 03:04.928 [SPEAKER_01]: And even if people in the Old Testament were highly favored by God and then they had multiple lives and things like that that was still not God's design and his plan. 03:08.109 --> 03:17.459 [SPEAKER_01]: And it's that way for a reason, you know, with everything that God did in the very beginning of of telling us the laws and to try to guide us, he's a loving father trying to protect us. 03:17.679 --> 03:23.805 [SPEAKER_01]: Typically in these discipleship episodes, Pastor Elwood has his Bible open over here, but Walt got his today. 03:24.205 --> 03:27.028 [SPEAKER_01]: And so he's going to read some more scriptures on marriage. 03:27.128 --> 03:28.330 [SPEAKER_00]: You know, marriage is a covenant. 03:29.496 --> 03:41.405 [SPEAKER_00]: When this by God, and in the Malachi chapter 2 verse 14 through 16, it says you ask quah, is because the Lord is the witness between you and the wife of your youth. 03:42.505 --> 03:46.649 [SPEAKER_00]: You have been unfaithful to her, though she is a reporter, the wife of your marriage covenant. 03:47.309 --> 03:54.134 [SPEAKER_00]: Has not the one God made you, you belong to him in body and spirit, and what does the one God seek Godly offspring? 03:54.354 --> 03:57.636 [SPEAKER_00]: So be on your guard and do not be unfaithful to the wife of your youth. 03:58.617 --> 04:06.102 [SPEAKER_00]: The man who hates and divorces his wife says the Lord, the God of Israel, does violence to the one he should protect, says the Lord Almighty. 04:06.902 --> 04:09.664 [SPEAKER_00]: So be on your guard and do not be unfaithful. 04:10.464 --> 04:27.355 [SPEAKER_00]: The big question we get a lot is if the covenant is between the two people and God, why involve the government or whatever they want to say, like why do they need to make it official per the world standards, I guess. 04:29.080 --> 04:29.782 [SPEAKER_00]: and what do you think? 04:30.423 --> 04:33.830 [SPEAKER_00]: I've got some scripture I want to read, but I think this is worth diving into. 04:34.225 --> 04:43.747 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I think so too, and my mind changed on this, because I'm gonna just explain me in Walt's early history here. 04:43.787 --> 04:51.969 [SPEAKER_01]: We've been married for 15 years, and as soon as we met, we knew that we were gonna get married, and it just took us a little while to make that official. 04:52.429 --> 04:54.210 [SPEAKER_01]: And I know that there's a lot of people in that boat. 04:54.510 --> 04:56.390 [SPEAKER_01]: There's a lot of people out there for whatever reasons. 04:56.430 --> 05:01.111 [SPEAKER_01]: They're just, they haven't made it official, and so in their minds and in their hearts, 05:04.572 --> 05:06.233 [SPEAKER_01]: And, you know, this was us. 05:06.654 --> 05:09.075 [SPEAKER_01]: We were not walking closely with Jesus at the time. 05:09.255 --> 05:11.297 [SPEAKER_01]: We were Christian, but very lukewarm. 05:11.437 --> 05:14.879 [SPEAKER_01]: We would go to church on Sundays, but that was as far as we took our faith. 05:14.919 --> 05:18.181 [SPEAKER_01]: We'd pray ever now, and then, but, you know, we were not disciples of Christ yet. 05:18.581 --> 05:28.848 [SPEAKER_01]: And so, you know, when Walt and I met, we kind of had took that assumption that since we were together and we're joined together two and one flesh that we were married, but that was not truth. 05:29.328 --> 05:32.190 [SPEAKER_01]: And in fact, Satan will try to give you lukehols like that. 05:32.490 --> 05:36.156 [SPEAKER_01]: because it will keep you in living in a lie and keep you living in sin. 05:36.656 --> 05:40.241 [SPEAKER_01]: And we know that sin separates us from God, like that's what sin does. 05:40.802 --> 05:44.387 [SPEAKER_01]: And so if there's a loophole there, the Satan can get you in and he'll try it. 05:44.668 --> 05:47.352 [SPEAKER_01]: First and foremost, I'll say if you don't have it official, 05:47.632 --> 06:08.127 [SPEAKER_01]: with the government for one, you're supposed to comply with the laws of the world, but if you don't make it official and I understand there's a lot of people out there that don't want anything to do with the GOV, they don't want anything to do with, but you know, you still comply to the laws of the land, you still pay your taxes, you still comply where there are areas to comply because you don't want to get in trouble by the law. 06:08.267 --> 06:11.992 [SPEAKER_00]: And that's Romans chapter 13, one through seven. 06:12.012 --> 06:15.517 [SPEAKER_00]: It's like, we're supposed to be subject to the governing authorities. 06:15.617 --> 06:18.361 [SPEAKER_00]: Unless it goes against God's commands. 06:18.461 --> 06:18.642 [SPEAKER_00]: Yep. 06:18.922 --> 06:21.385 [SPEAKER_01]: So there's a lot of people that don't want to comply in that area. 06:21.946 --> 06:23.128 [SPEAKER_01]: And I can understand it. 06:23.288 --> 06:32.735 [SPEAKER_01]: I can relate to it, but whenever you get married, it is a covenant, and that covenant, it has accountability attached to it when it is through all the laws. 06:33.035 --> 06:45.745 [SPEAKER_01]: So if you don't have the covenant and you don't go forth and have it all official, if something were to happen to you and that person, that's not your spouse, like they can't make medical decisions for you, they can't 06:46.846 --> 07:01.563 [SPEAKER_01]: you know make any sort of personal calls for you and then if something were to happen and y'all split up well there's no accountability there's nothing attached to it because it was never official in the first place and that's where it becomes so tricky and that's why we have laws and that's why we have 07:01.983 --> 07:04.907 [SPEAKER_01]: You know, things in place the way we do is that we're held accountable. 07:05.388 --> 07:07.891 [SPEAKER_01]: And when you take out the law, there's no accountability. 07:08.191 --> 07:11.496 [SPEAKER_01]: It's illegally embinding covenant that you have made. 07:11.996 --> 07:18.205 [SPEAKER_01]: And so, I know that that's controversial, but that's how I feel about it because I've seen both sides of it as a person that 07:18.885 --> 07:43.616 [SPEAKER_01]: wanted to be married but didn't want to go through with the government official things and then now to seeing the importance of it because you know I had a health journey which most of y'all know my testimony but my health journey was deep and if there came a time where a medical decision had to be made then without you being my spouse you wouldn't have been able to make it you would have you wouldn't have had any power and control over what happened to me 07:47.277 --> 08:04.340 [SPEAKER_01]: And so it's so important in different ways and now, you know, we have kids now and so when you don't have that accountability and you don't have the law full backup to being married there is repercussions to it and also in the spiritual realm not just the physical so that's my hot take on it. 08:05.017 --> 08:05.597 [SPEAKER_00]: in Jesus. 08:05.657 --> 08:15.280 [SPEAKER_00]: He distinguished him and his walk here on earth too between, you know, with the woman at the well, the difference between a husband and a man that she was with. 08:15.780 --> 08:16.600 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, he did. 08:16.640 --> 08:21.302 [SPEAKER_00]: And he did it pretty clearly because he told her at the well, you know, go call your husband and come back. 08:22.527 --> 08:27.630 [SPEAKER_00]: I have no husband she replied and she said to her you are right when you say you have no husband. 08:28.410 --> 08:32.792 [SPEAKER_00]: The fact is you've had five husbands and the man you are now with is not your husband. 08:33.212 --> 08:39.736 [SPEAKER_00]: There he is affirming she's already had five husbands she's been married five times and now she's living with somebody. 08:40.705 --> 08:43.988 [SPEAKER_00]: And he's probably involved with him, but he's saying you're not married. 08:44.128 --> 08:44.388 [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah. 08:44.428 --> 08:52.816 [SPEAKER_01]: So in during the law of Moses, there was divorce made and if there wasn't a divorce, if there was never a marriage certificate, there would never be a divorce certificate. 08:53.176 --> 08:59.102 [SPEAKER_01]: And now people will try to also argue this because if you Google this and you say, do you have to have a marriage certificate biblically? 08:59.522 --> 09:10.553 [SPEAKER_01]: It's probably going to tell you no, because in the Bible there are never states that you have to have an official certificate of marriage, but yet with the certificate of divorce, then wouldn't you have to have the certificate of marriage, too? 09:10.954 --> 09:21.905 [SPEAKER_01]: So there is something there is just that, you know, we don't have it in the biblical writings of what that entails, but we do know in our world today of what it looks like that when you're married, 09:22.285 --> 09:29.032 [SPEAKER_01]: And you're together, and then you divorce, you got a certificate of divorce, so you have to have the certificate of marriage first to have a certificate of divorce. 09:29.072 --> 09:33.676 [SPEAKER_01]: So it is, you know, like I said, it is a loophole that people will try to find. 09:33.956 --> 09:34.617 [SPEAKER_01]: I understand it. 09:35.338 --> 09:40.182 [SPEAKER_01]: Justifying your actions like that, that is something that humans, we just like to do it. 09:40.303 --> 09:45.728 [SPEAKER_01]: But the thing is, is when you start walking closely with Christ, then you want to honor Him. 09:46.168 --> 09:55.313 [SPEAKER_01]: you want to align your life to the principles and the laws that he has and you want to make sure that you're doing everything you can to get as close as you can to Jesus. 09:55.453 --> 10:07.640 [SPEAKER_01]: And so, you know, if you're out there and you're thinking that you're married to somebody but you're not legally married yet, then just ask yourself why because really there's no downfall to being married. 10:08.580 --> 10:12.923 [SPEAKER_01]: It's just the lack of accountability and that's pretty much it. 10:13.591 --> 10:19.833 [SPEAKER_00]: and biblically, because that's the question of biblically, why do I have to have a marriage certificate? 10:20.413 --> 10:23.274 [SPEAKER_00]: Well, biblically, why are you not getting one? 10:23.934 --> 10:33.697 [SPEAKER_00]: For my perspective, a special man, if you're with a woman and you're saying that you're married, and you don't take that step and you make it official, 10:34.872 --> 10:49.845 [SPEAKER_00]: you're dodging accountability like you're trying to put a layer of protection around yourself whether you want to admit it or not but like that's the biggest reason you're trying to protect yourself from financial hits so she's going to take half you're going to do that like let's be honest yeah. 10:51.075 --> 10:57.199 [SPEAKER_00]: And the people can sit there and hide, like, oh, well, in the Bible, you don't have to, but like, really why are you doing it? 10:57.459 --> 11:03.543 [SPEAKER_00]: I quite don't you want to get married because if it's really, this is your person and you're with them forever, why not do it? 11:04.124 --> 11:05.805 [SPEAKER_00]: Because there's way more benefits. 11:06.525 --> 11:09.587 [SPEAKER_00]: to being legally married in your states. 11:10.628 --> 11:13.430 [SPEAKER_00]: Like you said with hospital stuff, which we had to go through. 11:13.470 --> 11:18.954 [SPEAKER_00]: I mean imagine if we wasn't married during that time, it would have been a nightmare navigating all that. 11:19.134 --> 11:19.674 [SPEAKER_00]: And for what? 11:19.694 --> 11:22.837 [SPEAKER_00]: I quote, it would have been the reason, oh, well we're married before God. 11:23.797 --> 11:25.719 [SPEAKER_00]: And the hospital's gonna be like, I don't care. 11:26.239 --> 11:27.760 [SPEAKER_00]: Like you can't make a decision here. 11:28.080 --> 11:28.761 [SPEAKER_00]: Where's your mama? 11:29.181 --> 11:29.461 [SPEAKER_01]: Wow. 11:29.742 --> 11:29.962 [SPEAKER_00]: You know? 11:32.168 --> 11:43.495 [SPEAKER_01]: Well now let's talk about just biblical marriage in general of what that looks like, of how it looks walking together biblically because this is something that we slightly struggle with in the very beginning. 11:43.575 --> 11:56.803 [SPEAKER_01]: You'll know my health journey again, you've seen my testimony and you know I was I was dying of a lot of infirmities, a lot of sickness, had a big surgery and right after the big surgeries when I found Jesus and became a disciple of Christ. 11:57.443 --> 12:01.065 [SPEAKER_01]: And I started reading my Bible every single day and just changing everything. 12:01.485 --> 12:13.191 [SPEAKER_01]: And I can't even remember when I was going through my calls and just throwing out all my favorite clothes, all the stuff that I wore for so long, and Walt's just staying in there because, you know, at this point he hadn't started reading his Bible yet. 12:13.751 --> 12:17.513 [SPEAKER_01]: And here I am making all these changes in my life that are dramatic changes. 12:18.334 --> 12:24.477 [SPEAKER_01]: And you know, that's something so beautiful in scripture is it talks about how the wife, if she has a husband that's 12:24.897 --> 12:27.139 [SPEAKER_01]: and it says unbelieving, but what's always been a believer? 12:27.199 --> 12:28.079 [SPEAKER_01]: He's always been a Christian. 12:29.220 --> 12:43.570 [SPEAKER_01]: But if you have a husband that is not only the same page with you and you're a Christ follower and you're changing your life and you're trying to line it up to Christ, I kind of want to give some advice there because I walk through that and you know, what we all have our things in life that we've 12:43.910 --> 12:59.442 [SPEAKER_01]: We've done but the part of the worldly things was just it was really tough like we both lived in the world and when I had line my life up to Christ and I started getting rid of a bunch of stuff and changing things and trying to tell him why Halloween's demonic and things like that. 13:00.463 --> 13:01.103 [SPEAKER_01]: It was tough. 13:01.223 --> 13:07.248 [SPEAKER_01]: That was a really hard road to walk because I had to come from a place of love and grace. 13:08.368 --> 13:20.857 [SPEAKER_01]: And then also my actions in showing him the difference and the change, and how Jesus was just so prominent in my life, to even be the example for change. 13:21.057 --> 13:23.278 [SPEAKER_01]: Walt's always supported me with what I'm doing. 13:23.999 --> 13:29.362 [SPEAKER_01]: He was still working with another job, and when I started baptizing, he was always there. 13:29.402 --> 13:33.425 [SPEAKER_01]: He's not missed a single revival, any baptisms at all. 13:33.445 --> 13:35.607 [SPEAKER_01]: You've been there for every single baptism I've ever done. 13:36.367 --> 13:38.969 [SPEAKER_01]: And so he's always supported my journey with it. 13:39.309 --> 13:42.931 [SPEAKER_01]: But when it comes to be an equal yoke, this was something that we had to work at. 13:43.211 --> 13:51.277 [SPEAKER_01]: Like now it's come to the point where, you know, we both read our Bible every single day, and we both serve the Lord Jesus Christ with all that we have with all of our being. 13:51.597 --> 13:54.058 [SPEAKER_01]: I see Walt all the time that bringing people to Christ. 13:54.098 --> 14:01.063 [SPEAKER_01]: You know, there's lots of UPS drivers and Amazon drivers and neighbors and all kinds of people around here that know Christ because Walt's more vocal. 14:01.704 --> 14:04.367 [SPEAKER_01]: and goes out now and makes sure that he shows his faith. 14:04.487 --> 14:10.074 [SPEAKER_01]: How just really felt led to share that I know that the husband is supposed to be the spiritual head of the household. 14:10.134 --> 14:12.737 [SPEAKER_01]: This is biblically what God intended. 14:12.778 --> 14:15.962 [SPEAKER_01]: He intended for the husband to be the spiritual lead of the household. 14:16.562 --> 14:19.544 [SPEAKER_01]: But they're coming at time, and I see this all the time in the water as well. 14:19.584 --> 14:24.406 [SPEAKER_01]: I see a lot of people come for baptism, and their husbands are not yet where they are. 14:24.686 --> 14:30.229 [SPEAKER_01]: God's called them first, for whatever reason, God's called them and awoken them and set them on fire. 14:30.589 --> 14:33.550 [SPEAKER_01]: And their husbands are still over there in a cold basement. 14:33.710 --> 14:38.793 [SPEAKER_01]: And so it takes time sometimes, whenever your spouse is not on the same page. 14:39.674 --> 14:46.859 [SPEAKER_01]: as you are and your own fire, but with patience, with love, with understanding, the love of Christ will break through. 14:47.180 --> 14:54.746 [SPEAKER_01]: The Bible says that your unbelieving husband, if you were one of those out there that's dealing with this, that your unbelieving husband, will see the example that you're setting. 14:55.306 --> 14:56.927 [SPEAKER_01]: And he can be saved from it. 14:57.007 --> 15:07.076 [SPEAKER_01]: So I just encourage you to continue to follow the Lord and read your Bible and be vocal in your prayers because it really is a true blessing when you're equally 15:07.949 --> 15:15.495 [SPEAKER_00]: See, it'd be an equally oak, it's a complete game changer just on the loft in general. 15:16.676 --> 15:31.508 [SPEAKER_00]: And how you live it, and you don't really know until you reach the point where you are equally oak, and then you look back to when you were not, and the world had you pull in in different ways, and the strains that it puts on, 15:32.309 --> 15:35.693 [SPEAKER_00]: a marriage is really evident once you're out of it. 15:36.074 --> 15:38.977 [SPEAKER_00]: There are certain things you can't do for the other person. 15:39.798 --> 15:44.624 [SPEAKER_00]: You know, like you couldn't make me pick up a bottle and read it. 15:45.345 --> 15:48.729 [SPEAKER_00]: And I do believe there's a lot of husbands and wives that 15:49.752 --> 15:54.573 [SPEAKER_00]: may go to church on Sunday because they're wife wants them to go. 15:55.733 --> 16:00.914 [SPEAKER_00]: And there's a lot of people who put up with whatever because they're wife wants them to where their husband wants them to. 16:00.974 --> 16:05.275 [SPEAKER_00]: More so, I would say, that the wife is dragging everybody to church these days. 16:05.355 --> 16:07.276 [SPEAKER_00]: It's kind of what it is, honestly. 16:07.296 --> 16:17.218 [SPEAKER_00]: The men really do need to step up out there and be the spiritual leaders of the household because it is what we're called to do, 16:19.837 --> 16:24.178 [SPEAKER_00]: You know, you're not picking up the bottle on your own and you're not reading the word daily. 16:24.898 --> 16:29.720 [SPEAKER_00]: And, but at the end of the day, you can't make somebody do these things, you know? 16:29.780 --> 16:34.661 [SPEAKER_00]: It's like it's such a personal thing between you and the Lord. 16:35.221 --> 16:36.682 [SPEAKER_00]: It's like the priorities for that. 16:36.702 --> 16:41.383 [SPEAKER_00]: Mine was, I've talked about it many times, but they were all messed up, you know? 16:42.663 --> 16:44.984 [SPEAKER_00]: I saw myself as the husband and the provider. 16:46.827 --> 16:47.168 [SPEAKER_00]: 100%. 16:47.208 --> 16:53.915 [SPEAKER_00]: And I know there's so many men in the world and husbands out there that they put that pressure on their selves. 16:54.476 --> 16:56.578 [SPEAKER_00]: That is what they find their identity in. 16:57.299 --> 16:59.502 [SPEAKER_00]: It's like being the guy that... 17:00.728 --> 17:01.368 [SPEAKER_00]: making the money. 17:01.408 --> 17:04.610 [SPEAKER_00]: This isn't everybody, but I know there's a lot of them that are because that's where I was. 17:05.010 --> 17:11.354 [SPEAKER_00]: Had to pay the bills, had to take care of the kids, make sure by a head underwear and put on, got their socks and got a whole, you know what I mean? 17:11.674 --> 17:18.038 [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, keep food on the table and you can get so wrapped up in that and I did because it is important. 17:19.709 --> 17:27.442 [SPEAKER_00]: And it's like until you can get cross first in your own life, and that takes the place of that. 17:27.543 --> 17:32.271 [SPEAKER_00]: And that's where your identity has to be found as in cross, and you gotta go find that. 17:32.865 --> 17:36.566 [SPEAKER_01]: You know, some marriages out there are super easy and some are super hard. 17:37.026 --> 17:43.688 [SPEAKER_01]: And there's times that you have good times and you have bad times when you're doing life together, you're living together, you're seeing each other all the time. 17:44.008 --> 17:54.151 [SPEAKER_01]: You're having to learn how to work with each other, not, you know, like sandpaper rubbing against each other but just work with each other and those kind of things, it takes a whole lot of love of Christ. 17:54.431 --> 18:01.073 [SPEAKER_01]: And you know, I brought back to in first Corinthians where it says love is patient, love is kind, love does not envy, it does not boast, 18:02.493 --> 18:15.010 [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's first Corinthians says love is patient love is kind it does not envy It does not boast it is not proud it does not dishonor others It is not self-seeking. 18:15.230 --> 18:16.311 [SPEAKER_00]: It is not easily angered. 18:16.472 --> 18:18.014 [SPEAKER_00]: It keeps no record of wrongs 18:19.175 --> 18:27.642 [SPEAKER_00]: love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth that always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves, love never fails. 18:28.182 --> 18:30.984 [SPEAKER_00]: Everybody that's married, you've got these petty arguments that happen. 18:31.204 --> 18:35.167 [SPEAKER_00]: The enemy has this way of taking mohills and turning them into mountains. 18:35.608 --> 18:41.192 [SPEAKER_00]: The majority of conflicts, especially in marriage, it is a spiritual thing. 18:41.212 --> 18:41.592 [SPEAKER_00]: You've got it. 18:41.612 --> 18:42.373 [SPEAKER_00]: We are different. 18:43.787 --> 18:49.931 [SPEAKER_00]: men and women, I don't have to tell you all this, it's like apples and oranges, it's like Mars and Venus. 18:50.512 --> 18:51.773 [SPEAKER_00]: It's not the same thing. 18:51.833 --> 18:53.514 [SPEAKER_00]: They're just, we're not made the same. 18:54.234 --> 18:55.635 [SPEAKER_00]: Our minds don't work the same. 18:56.316 --> 18:57.477 [SPEAKER_00]: Nothing works the same. 18:59.658 --> 19:26.502 [SPEAKER_00]: you've got to understand that when you especially when you're yokes and you everybody can understand the spiritual side of marriage and the way the enemy wants to attack it when you can see that you can overcome and you can persevere and through all that you're going up with a stronger marriage you're going to end up with this first Corinthians the way it talks about love you'll be able to walk that out more often 19:27.162 --> 19:27.622 [SPEAKER_00]: then not. 19:27.942 --> 19:29.003 [SPEAKER_00]: It doesn't mean we're perfect. 19:29.023 --> 19:31.004 [SPEAKER_00]: It doesn't mean we still don't have our spats. 19:31.384 --> 19:34.545 [SPEAKER_00]: We don't agree on everything but through the help of the Lord. 19:35.265 --> 19:38.667 [SPEAKER_00]: We make it work and we keep pushing forward and we know who we are. 19:38.707 --> 19:40.147 [SPEAKER_00]: We know our identity and Christ. 19:40.747 --> 19:42.408 [SPEAKER_00]: We understand the spiritual side. 19:43.428 --> 19:47.070 [SPEAKER_00]: We know it's there and I think that's really helped us. 19:47.562 --> 19:50.886 [SPEAKER_01]: You know, with marriage, it's so important also just to help each other in life. 19:51.066 --> 19:58.554 [SPEAKER_01]: Of whatever it is that the other person is struggling with, whatever they're going through, whether it's physical, whether it's spiritual, just being there for one another's huge. 19:58.914 --> 20:03.920 [SPEAKER_01]: And, you know, I often think about the disciples because Jesus sent them out too bad too. 20:04.620 --> 20:10.302 [SPEAKER_01]: And even from the very beginning, he said that it wasn't good that man was alone, so he created the woman to be with him. 20:10.963 --> 20:13.544 [SPEAKER_01]: And so God always sent people out to about two. 20:13.604 --> 20:14.544 [SPEAKER_01]: It's kind of been a thing. 20:14.644 --> 20:17.625 [SPEAKER_01]: So from the very beginning, he's like, oh, you're alone. 20:17.665 --> 20:19.886 [SPEAKER_01]: Let me get you somebody to say you're not alone. 20:20.306 --> 20:24.268 [SPEAKER_01]: And then like I said, when he sent out when Jesus sent out the disciples to about two. 20:25.129 --> 20:29.372 [SPEAKER_01]: You know, I do believe it's to help one another that you are to uplift the other person when they're down. 20:29.452 --> 20:40.162 [SPEAKER_01]: They're to be able to be that, you know, guidance and in that protection and that love and clarity and situations and just help each other in every area that you're in. 20:40.623 --> 20:42.685 [SPEAKER_01]: And, you know, talk about it all the time. 20:43.225 --> 20:47.187 [SPEAKER_01]: I say, because this is true, but we're physical beings, but we are spiritual. 20:47.347 --> 20:50.148 [SPEAKER_01]: Like our spirits are what goes on the live forever for eternity. 20:50.208 --> 20:53.590 [SPEAKER_01]: So, you know, you can't look at everything in the physical all the time. 20:54.250 --> 20:58.612 [SPEAKER_01]: And, you know, spiritually making sure each other's fed, spiritually, you know, not just physically. 20:58.972 --> 21:00.413 [SPEAKER_01]: Like we make sure our bodies are fed. 21:00.553 --> 21:02.314 [SPEAKER_01]: Like we make sure we don't skip meals. 21:02.354 --> 21:06.836 [SPEAKER_01]: You know, like most people that are, that are, that are, you know, that the skipping home meals are good. 21:06.916 --> 21:10.177 [SPEAKER_01]: And that's listen, almost bad amount of nutrition, foods important, but not. 21:10.197 --> 21:11.378 [SPEAKER_00]: He's skipping meals in this house. 21:12.178 --> 21:38.184 [SPEAKER_01]: but it's not obviously like if we're fasting we will skip milk but anyways it's a big deal that if you're feeding each other and your understanding's physical food then you also have to understand spiritual food at night I mean we literally join our hands and we we truly go to war in prayer for whatever's going on in our lives like whether it be for me whether it be for him or kids our family our friends like we we pray together and 21:38.724 --> 21:50.395 [SPEAKER_01]: And I truly believe that's lacking in the world, though we have today, is that everybody is so independent, and they're just like, oh, it's just all about me and me and me and they just roll over and whatever, and that's not the way it should be. 21:50.535 --> 21:59.203 [SPEAKER_01]: Like you were two and one flush, and so making sure that you're on the same page with that and making sure you're, you know, I think it's very healthy to be able to pray with each other. 21:59.583 --> 22:04.447 [SPEAKER_01]: You know, Walton, I realize that we are the examples for our kids and, you know, they look up to us. 22:04.487 --> 22:10.611 [SPEAKER_01]: That's what God gave us kids for, is to be able to steward them, to disciple them, to show them, you know, who Jesus is. 22:11.072 --> 22:16.876 [SPEAKER_01]: And so our lives are so important to show that we are an example, and, you know, that's every marriage. 22:17.056 --> 22:20.439 [SPEAKER_01]: Every marriage out there, if you have children and you have people around you, 22:20.859 --> 22:48.838 [SPEAKER_01]: they're going to be looking to you in your marriage and if you have those moments where you know if you and I were to ever yell at each other and we had those moments where we're like yelling or you know we don't curse which you used to but anyways you don't anymore and I'm so grateful for that but it's been years and years of us like actually following Christ and making sure that we're leading back example but the both of us now I mean you know we don't have those unhealthy moments because if we did our children would and you're seeing that in the world 22:49.258 --> 22:58.500 [SPEAKER_01]: you're seeing it in the school systems, you're seeing it in the churches, you're seeing these kids with filthy language, they snap, they can't regulate their emotions, and that comes from them watching their parents. 22:58.980 --> 23:17.445 [SPEAKER_01]: So I think it's so important in a marriage that you've steered it well, that you are rooted in Christ and that your actions show that, because something that is so biblical is whatever is inward will come outwards, like it's whatever you got inside of you, if you were harboring anger and bitterness 23:19.605 --> 23:25.829 [SPEAKER_01]: If you get drunk and have problems with drugs or alcohol, whatever you have inside, it's going to be reflected. 23:26.530 --> 23:28.811 [SPEAKER_01]: And that's often to the people that's closest to you. 23:29.031 --> 23:33.214 [SPEAKER_01]: And so your husband, your children, your people around you, they're going to see those things. 23:33.734 --> 23:36.596 [SPEAKER_01]: And so it's so important to get yourself right with Christ first. 23:37.116 --> 23:40.938 [SPEAKER_01]: And then you can be the best you can be with the people around you and be that example. 23:41.278 --> 23:48.301 [SPEAKER_01]: It wouldn't have been just so nice to see so many families now just get back to the biblical basis, but that starts with the parents. 23:48.341 --> 23:50.302 [SPEAKER_01]: It doesn't start with the kids, it starts with the parents, so. 23:50.782 --> 23:56.045 [SPEAKER_00]: And I would say it needs to start with the man in a lot of cases, you know, because there's so much. 23:58.145 --> 24:23.017 [SPEAKER_00]: prod in anger that you see out of men a lot of times women aren't perfect by any means yeah but it's like just men's got to do the part you know what I mean and we have to take responsibility and just because you drop your prod doesn't mean that you were a pushover if we were vehicles I would run on diesel and you would run on gasoline saying and a lot of 24:27.925 --> 24:29.186 [SPEAKER_01]: Like analogy that is. 24:29.386 --> 24:47.735 [SPEAKER_00]: But I mean for, it's it's we're two different machines and like a lot of times it takes drop in the pride and the ego and all these things to be able to truly see that and see what your partner across from you needs because she doesn't need the same things you need and it takes patience. 24:48.015 --> 24:48.235 [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah. 24:48.975 --> 24:51.977 [SPEAKER_00]: It takes getting control of your anger because at Ephesians it says, 24:53.097 --> 25:13.842 [SPEAKER_00]: In your anger do not sin and do not let the sun go down while you're still angry and do not give the devil a foothold James talks about anger to anger such a big thing and Marriages it is actually because Like you said whatever's inwards going to come outward and this may not come out in public or around people. 25:13.902 --> 25:14.622 [SPEAKER_00]: It's gonna come out 25:15.870 --> 25:25.339 [SPEAKER_00]: mainly around your spouse, because that's who you should be around the most, but that's where you are your guard, I would say, there's no acting. 25:25.720 --> 25:31.525 [SPEAKER_00]: You can't act around your spouse, you are who you are and whatever's there will eventually come out. 25:32.526 --> 25:35.229 [SPEAKER_00]: And it's like you got it, you may have to deal with some things. 25:35.649 --> 25:39.072 [SPEAKER_00]: You can't hide who you are and once inside with your spouse, and you shouldn't. 25:40.599 --> 26:04.176 [SPEAKER_00]: And when it gets ugly, you want to spouse it's there to help you through it, pick you up, not tearing you down, and so many people on a tear, the other person down to the level that they're at, get even and get this, get that, they'll talk about it to their friends or their family, and so and so this, this is why he's using it's a problem, and it's not the way it's supposed to be, it's supposed to be together and help each other out. 26:04.936 --> 26:10.821 [SPEAKER_00]: And James won 1, verse 19 through 20, it says, my dear brothers and sisters, take note of this. 26:12.023 --> 26:16.887 [SPEAKER_00]: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. 26:17.828 --> 26:22.032 [SPEAKER_00]: Because human angry does not produce the righteousness that God desires. 26:22.440 --> 26:28.765 [SPEAKER_01]: You know, marriage is sacred, and it really is in the eyes of God, it is very sacred and beautiful. 26:28.986 --> 26:34.230 [SPEAKER_01]: And I feel like the meaning of marriage has gotten kind of lost in our culture, you know. 26:34.630 --> 26:37.393 [SPEAKER_01]: Like back in our grandparents' days, they were not separating. 26:37.573 --> 26:43.498 [SPEAKER_01]: Like they stuck it out and they went through hard times, good times, all the things together. 26:43.858 --> 26:45.640 [SPEAKER_01]: I don't know if you've done any which I haven't, but 26:46.581 --> 26:54.991 [SPEAKER_01]: If you look at the logistics of the percentages, probably of divorce rates, I'm sure that they are just multiplying. 26:55.011 --> 26:57.134 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm sure that they're getting more and more and more every year. 26:57.674 --> 27:02.060 [SPEAKER_01]: I do believe that that's because God is not in the center of people's marriages anymore. 27:02.740 --> 27:11.524 [SPEAKER_01]: And like I said, you look at our grandparents and you look at their day and I feel like they, you know, were a little bit more committed and just faithful. 27:11.984 --> 27:16.346 [SPEAKER_01]: And I do understand like Satan has done a great job in this world of running people ragged. 27:16.406 --> 27:18.207 [SPEAKER_01]: There are so many people that are just 27:18.747 --> 27:20.128 [SPEAKER_01]: you know, they're so busy. 27:20.308 --> 27:23.531 [SPEAKER_01]: People will get their priorities all out of whack. 27:23.571 --> 27:36.422 [SPEAKER_01]: You know, they'll put sports or they'll put family or they'll put friends or they'll put hobbies above their spouse above God and that's where we see a lot of problems in the world is that the priorities are out of whack. 27:36.463 --> 27:38.925 [SPEAKER_01]: So, you know, God must be first in your life. 27:39.165 --> 27:44.710 [SPEAKER_01]: Like Jesus should be the king of your life and he should be first and foremost and then should be your spouse right after. 27:45.350 --> 27:50.251 [SPEAKER_01]: And, you know, there's a scripture that talks about loving your wife as if you love the church. 27:50.871 --> 27:58.273 [SPEAKER_01]: And, you know, it's very important to love each other in a manner that is godly, that is, you know, righteous. 27:58.873 --> 28:00.514 [SPEAKER_01]: And, not putting things before them. 28:00.814 --> 28:04.615 [SPEAKER_01]: And, like I said, the priority thing in the world right now is just so out of whack. 28:04.655 --> 28:08.215 [SPEAKER_01]: People were prioritized, social media, they were prioritized their phones. 28:08.235 --> 28:13.957 [SPEAKER_01]: So, prioritized, like I said, football games, or whatever, maybe they case over their spouse. 28:15.798 --> 28:32.593 [SPEAKER_01]: It's really sad, it's really unfortunate of how that's happened in our society, but I do believe that's why the divorce rates are so high, is that there's so many things that are distracting, they're shiny, and they take the attention of people, and then it's very easy to come out of that covenant, it's very easy just to give up on it. 28:33.213 --> 28:37.835 [SPEAKER_01]: And, you know, that's the thing also with this life is that it's definitely not easy. 28:38.535 --> 28:42.296 [SPEAKER_01]: And there's times where you have to push through, there's times that are hard. 28:42.816 --> 28:44.577 [SPEAKER_01]: And so many people don't do that anymore. 28:44.657 --> 28:45.597 [SPEAKER_01]: They just throw in the towel. 28:45.677 --> 28:46.658 [SPEAKER_01]: They're just like, you know what? 28:46.718 --> 28:47.358 [SPEAKER_01]: Like, I'm done. 28:47.638 --> 28:51.640 [SPEAKER_01]: But it's not going to make it better, just you give it up on something and quitting on it. 28:51.760 --> 28:52.800 [SPEAKER_01]: It doesn't make things better. 28:53.440 --> 28:57.942 [SPEAKER_01]: And you know, I see a lot of people come in the water for baptism, and their marriages are in shambles. 28:58.083 --> 29:04.026 [SPEAKER_01]: And I see it time and time again where Jesus restores it, and it's just such a blessing to see. 29:04.106 --> 29:08.288 [SPEAKER_01]: But, you know, knowing that restoration for your marriages out there, it is real. 29:08.448 --> 29:09.628 [SPEAKER_01]: Like, Jesus can mend it. 29:09.768 --> 29:10.569 [SPEAKER_01]: He can fix it. 29:11.189 --> 29:40.107 [SPEAKER_01]: And, you know, I think it's just so important to get your priorities back in line, first putting God first and looking at your spouse, looking at what they need, looking at what's lacking in your relationship, looking at what could be better, analyzing is so important, you know, because that's a part of not being selfish, like when you're selfish, you often look at yourself and what you need and your needs, but when you look at the other person and you just think, hey, like they're a little sad today or, you know, they look like they may be in pain today, let me rub their back or, 29:40.567 --> 29:43.589 [SPEAKER_01]: you know, they've worked must have been hard today. 29:43.609 --> 29:44.770 [SPEAKER_01]: Let me cook their favorite meal. 29:45.130 --> 29:51.954 [SPEAKER_01]: Whatever it may be, that you can uplift each other, that you can help each other through and prayer, you know, like Walt, bless his heart. 29:51.994 --> 29:53.375 [SPEAKER_01]: He can't even stop the tone. 29:53.395 --> 29:54.175 [SPEAKER_01]: I'm praying over it. 29:54.415 --> 30:01.620 [SPEAKER_01]: But it's very important to support each other through no matter what it is that life throws your way and to have your priorities straight. 30:02.365 --> 30:19.572 [SPEAKER_00]: If the devil doesn't want strong marriages rooted in Christ and like culturally you talk about like our grandparents and all that, the culture was different and now these podcasters and like mainstream, it's like cancer, these narratives of like go make yourself happy. 30:20.192 --> 30:25.595 [SPEAKER_00]: Like if he's not doing what he needs to do, go find you another man like this is everywhere. 30:26.275 --> 30:30.697 [SPEAKER_00]: It's like it's just people are disposable and it's like if you're not 30:32.558 --> 30:33.919 [SPEAKER_00]: We can always justify. 30:34.339 --> 30:38.881 [SPEAKER_00]: This is what we can, as humans, we can always justify our decisions. 30:39.521 --> 30:45.143 [SPEAKER_00]: But if we take our decisions and back it up to Scripture, they become a lot harder to justify. 30:46.124 --> 30:47.444 [SPEAKER_00]: But a lot of people don't want to do that. 30:47.464 --> 30:49.545 [SPEAKER_00]: They don't want that level of accountability. 30:50.045 --> 30:56.008 [SPEAKER_00]: And the world is just pushing these narratives of like, oh, it's just so demonic. 31:03.097 --> 31:05.058 [SPEAKER_00]: people were just getting divorced for whatever reason. 31:05.078 --> 31:06.278 [SPEAKER_00]: There's no effort there. 31:06.878 --> 31:07.078 [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah. 31:07.098 --> 31:08.018 [SPEAKER_00]: There's no effort there. 31:08.999 --> 31:17.201 [SPEAKER_01]: I want to talk about divorce because obviously, in the law of Moses, when divorce was created, it was so that husbands couldn't just throw out their wives. 31:17.441 --> 31:22.462 [SPEAKER_01]: Because in the beginning of time, I don't know what they had going on there, but women were very oppressed. 31:22.642 --> 31:25.803 [SPEAKER_01]: And they definitely would just throw out their wives and get a new one. 31:26.223 --> 31:30.865 [SPEAKER_01]: And the law of Moses was created so that the husbands wouldn't just be throwing out their wives. 31:32.325 --> 31:38.588 [SPEAKER_01]: You know, it doesn't mean that you can and should get a divorce, and Jesus actually hits up on this whenever he was teaching. 31:39.368 --> 31:49.232 [SPEAKER_01]: He walked this earth, he taught us, and when he was teaching, he explained that of the sacred covenant of marriage, so I don't get it wrong, I'm going to have him actually read the scripture. 31:49.737 --> 32:05.821 [SPEAKER_00]: Matthew, chapter 5, 31 and 32, has been said, anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce, but I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife except for sexual immorality makes her the victim of adultery and anyone who marries a divorce woman commits adultery. 32:06.065 --> 32:07.006 [SPEAKER_01]: So I hear this a lot. 32:07.126 --> 32:09.748 [SPEAKER_01]: I hear a lot of people ask me if they can't be remarried. 32:09.908 --> 32:16.132 [SPEAKER_01]: There's a ton of time that people come up to me and they take that one scripture and they say, does this mean I can't remarry? 32:16.212 --> 32:19.255 [SPEAKER_01]: Or does this mean that since I got a divorce that I'm condemned? 32:19.635 --> 32:20.856 [SPEAKER_01]: And no, it does not. 32:21.276 --> 32:27.340 [SPEAKER_01]: I do understand what Jesus was saying, though, what Jesus was trying to say and explain was that the covenant stands. 32:27.941 --> 32:28.942 [SPEAKER_01]: God never intended. 32:29.602 --> 32:30.302 [SPEAKER_01]: for divorce. 32:30.782 --> 32:38.224 [SPEAKER_01]: It's just that the law of Moses, whenever it was made, it was so that people couldn't just use it and throw out their wives. 32:38.424 --> 32:40.584 [SPEAKER_01]: And it wasn't a cushion. 32:41.024 --> 32:42.765 [SPEAKER_01]: It wasn't a justification of it. 32:42.825 --> 32:44.305 [SPEAKER_01]: And that's what Jesus was explaining. 32:44.745 --> 32:52.907 [SPEAKER_01]: When Jesus was explaining to people about marriage and the covenant, he was explaining how sacred it was to God that you really should not get divorce. 32:53.467 --> 33:11.174 [SPEAKER_01]: But then there's obviously exceptions and there has to be like we are in perfect beings and in this world We live in there has to be justice and in this moment if you you know our inner relationship where someone's abusing you or there is adultery or whatever's going on God is a just God he is a loving God 33:11.914 --> 33:29.671 [SPEAKER_01]: And there's moments where people do get divorced and whenever they get divorced, you know, I don't I don't believe they're condemned You know, obviously anybody can come to Jesus for forgiveness I don't believe that it's something that they're you know gonna go to hell for I mean that's something very blunt But people ask me all that all the time they're like, hey, I got divorce. 33:29.691 --> 33:30.672 [SPEAKER_01]: Does that mean I'm going to hell? 33:31.052 --> 33:31.352 [SPEAKER_01]: Well, no 33:32.193 --> 33:52.987 [SPEAKER_01]: And I think that that's part of the fire and Britain storm preaching that a lot of people were brought up in is that you know, it was just it was just condemnation, but we know that we serve Jesus Christ and he's a loving God and as he explained to us that divorce shouldn't happen he doesn't want divorce to happen, but in the case that it does, it should be biblical. 33:53.627 --> 34:02.534 [SPEAKER_01]: And so when it comes to remarriage as well, you know, we do see the time at the woman at the well, she is such an example for all of us because Jesus forgave her. 34:02.654 --> 34:03.915 [SPEAKER_01]: She was married five times. 34:04.215 --> 34:06.436 [SPEAKER_01]: And then the man that she was with was not her husband. 34:06.577 --> 34:08.378 [SPEAKER_01]: So, you know, Jesus forgave her. 34:08.658 --> 34:11.499 [SPEAKER_01]: And he not only that, but he set her own fire. 34:11.599 --> 34:13.620 [SPEAKER_01]: He gave her a commission, basically. 34:13.640 --> 34:18.662 [SPEAKER_01]: She was the first person to go and evangelize and to be able to tell about Jesus. 34:19.042 --> 34:21.082 [SPEAKER_01]: So that's just a huge example, Biblically. 34:21.142 --> 34:23.483 [SPEAKER_01]: But yeah, I'm asked those questions all the time. 34:23.723 --> 34:31.886 [SPEAKER_01]: And it's unfortunate because people can take one verse and they can throw it all the way out of context and they can condemn people with it and they can judge people with it. 34:31.926 --> 34:33.447 [SPEAKER_01]: But that's not what Christ does. 34:34.087 --> 34:42.775 [SPEAKER_01]: Actually, think that everybody must study that self-approved and seek God's heart and to be able to see what he truly intended for marriage to be. 34:43.056 --> 34:45.017 [SPEAKER_01]: The last thing I want to talk about here is that 34:46.020 --> 35:05.264 [SPEAKER_01]: your marriage is so important and if there's anything lacking in it and anything that you can do to correct it anything that you can change and repent of and I encourage you just to seek the Lord for that because it's such a beautiful thing to be able to love one another and to be able to see the gift that God has given you. 35:05.584 --> 35:08.885 [SPEAKER_00]: Does say a man who finds a wife finds a good thing and I would have to agree. 35:10.418 --> 35:15.280 [SPEAKER_01]: And so I just encourage you if you need to work on your relationship, then what better time than now. 35:16.020 --> 35:19.901 [SPEAKER_01]: And putting Christ at the center of your marriage is the key. 35:19.961 --> 35:20.481 [SPEAKER_01]: That's it. 35:20.861 --> 35:26.943 [SPEAKER_01]: Yep, out of everything that you could ever do, you can change, you can fix, you can straighten up, but it's got to come from the root 35:27.303 --> 35:51.593 [SPEAKER_01]: and the root is that you need to be grounded and rooted in Christ so we encourage you to seek the Lord and then just to find any lack in your marriage, find anything that could be worked on and work on it, fix it, strengthen your marriage because you know the enemy is the one that comes to still kill and destroy but Jesus Christ came to give us life and give it abundantly and you can seek that, you can seek love and happiness and joy but those things are 35:52.873 --> 36:15.561 [SPEAKER_01]: And you know wake up every day and you choose to be happy and joyful no matter what your circumstance is or no matter what you're going through And just help each other through the hard times because this life is not easy But you know God's given you a partner if you're married God's given you a partner to go through this life with so make sure you're cherishing that make sure you're not just wasting it and Just putting God first 36:16.727 --> 36:18.687 [SPEAKER_00]: You don't give up on your marriage out there, you know? 36:19.548 --> 36:23.128 [SPEAKER_00]: And a lot of times you can try to throw everything at it. 36:23.708 --> 36:25.609 [SPEAKER_00]: It's trying to change things about the other person. 36:25.629 --> 36:27.989 [SPEAKER_00]: You're talking about you want to change things with the other person. 36:29.570 --> 36:31.690 [SPEAKER_00]: The approach needs to be. 36:32.670 --> 36:36.811 [SPEAKER_00]: Each individual seek the Lord, seek that person relationship. 36:36.851 --> 36:38.651 [SPEAKER_00]: He'll deal with the other stuff. 36:38.691 --> 36:39.372 [SPEAKER_00]: That's the key. 36:40.132 --> 36:43.372 [SPEAKER_00]: And if you have both people doing that, it'll work. 36:43.732 --> 36:44.833 [SPEAKER_00]: And you'll see it smooth out. 36:46.853 --> 36:50.960 [SPEAKER_00]: and the love come back in the patience and the grace and all the things. 36:51.381 --> 36:56.209 [SPEAKER_00]: But you're not going to get it by the things of this world or the mentality of this world. 36:56.269 --> 36:56.830 [SPEAKER_00]: It's got to be 36:58.455 --> 36:59.996 [SPEAKER_00]: through that relationship with Christ. 37:00.536 --> 37:03.218 [SPEAKER_00]: And each one obviously got to do it and to help each other. 37:03.978 --> 37:16.185 [SPEAKER_00]: And you can see a marriage transformed and through that, if you get a marriage transformed by Christ and both people are walking that way, the fruit that will come from that is inevitable. 37:16.745 --> 37:24.189 [SPEAKER_00]: And at that point, it's not just about you, it's not even just about your family, but you all can do as a unit. 37:25.937 --> 37:30.719 [SPEAKER_00]: working for cross-together and that equally yoke we will have an impact on eternity. 37:30.739 --> 37:39.002 [SPEAKER_01]: I just want to explain what yoke means because we've talked about it a few times, but back in the day they would have oxen and they would have each a yoke on them. 37:39.042 --> 37:41.923 [SPEAKER_01]: They would have something around their necks and that's what's called a yoke. 37:42.363 --> 37:44.824 [SPEAKER_01]: And basically it would lead in guide and steer them. 37:45.244 --> 37:48.905 [SPEAKER_01]: And so if two people have the yokes on them and there's a bar between you, 37:49.325 --> 38:00.688 [SPEAKER_01]: Then if you're plowing a field or if you're working a field, then if the two oxen that are chained together here are going forward, then they're going to be tilling a nice straight forward path. 38:01.048 --> 38:08.031 [SPEAKER_01]: But if one of them is going this way or is going backwards, then the other one's going to be spinning in circles and they're going to get nothing done. 38:08.491 --> 38:16.293 [SPEAKER_01]: To have people equally yoked like that is so important because you're plowing more ground, you're going forward, you're moving in the direction together. 38:16.693 --> 38:27.681 [SPEAKER_01]: And so that's what the parable means there with being equal yoped, but it really is important to you know, just both try to be on the the same path and you know, God's put you together, you're two and one flesh. 38:28.101 --> 38:36.367 [SPEAKER_01]: And so both of you to, you know, be steadfast and Christ and to put him above all, love never fails and it's such a blessing to be married. 38:36.887 --> 38:40.928 [SPEAKER_01]: And like I said, we've been married 15 years and I think God for what every day. 38:41.008 --> 38:44.669 [SPEAKER_01]: So super grateful that you sat down and did this discipleship lesson. 38:44.709 --> 38:50.210 [SPEAKER_01]: I pray that there's something one of us said that maybe impacted your journey, impacted your marriage, impacted your life. 38:50.851 --> 38:54.091 [SPEAKER_01]: Thank you so much for joining us on this discipleship episode. 38:54.291 --> 38:55.392 [SPEAKER_00]: And I'll see you back soon. 38:56.012 --> 38:59.153 [SPEAKER_00]: I'll see you back soon for another discipleship episode. 38:59.173 --> 39:00.073 [SPEAKER_00]: Not this guy. 39:02.874 --> 39:03.854 [SPEAKER_01]: Jesus, take the will. 39:05.605 --> 39:06.373 [SPEAKER_00]: Love never fails. 39:06.596 --> 39:07.344 [SPEAKER_01]: I've never fails.