[SPEAKER_00]: Hello, hello, everybody.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm Lexi Lombard, your host, the Lexi podcast and a happy new year.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hope you guys had a great holiday season and your 2026 has been a strong kickoff or relaxing kickoff whatever it is that you're looking for.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hope that's what you see.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now I have jumped into this year in two different ways.
[SPEAKER_00]: The first was mid December.
[SPEAKER_00]: I had learned about this ritual.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was so precious, so adorable.
[SPEAKER_00]: I shared it on Instagram and it goes like this.
[SPEAKER_00]: During the winter solstice, which is the shortest night of the year, you write down 12 wishes, 12 little slips of paper.
[SPEAKER_00]: They can be anything you want.
[SPEAKER_00]: You fold them up, put them in a container, draw one without looking, burn it.
[SPEAKER_00]: next night, draw one without looking, burn it.
[SPEAKER_00]: You do this for 11 nights.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now all of these burned wishes are up to your ancestors, the ether, the universe, God, whatever it is you believe in, they're taking care of those.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then, Jan 1, you open the one that is left, you read it, and that wins your responsibility.
[SPEAKER_00]: so I have my 11 wishes that are up to the others that will hopefully make themselves come to light in their own way and then I have the one that I read which was clear communication skills and with that I was thinking what am I not clear about in my relationships as some of you have heard if you listen to my episode with my friend Morgan
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not the greatest at getting back to text messages.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't do well in a group chat.
[SPEAKER_00]: So in this rudimentary way, I need to get clearer communication by just keeping up with the messages that I'm receiving and reading them.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not even that I'm not responding.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's that I'm not even reading them.
[SPEAKER_00]: For example, my friends having a dinner party tonight.
[SPEAKER_00]: And she tags me separately and said, I know you don't read group chats.
[SPEAKER_00]: So I'm texting you separately.
[SPEAKER_00]: Here's the information for dinner tonight.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said sounds good.
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you so much.
[SPEAKER_00]: And that's something I would like to work on.
[SPEAKER_00]: The second area of communication that I could work on is I will let something slide and let something else slide and let things continue to slide until I realize that there's a pattern and I didn't address it and now I'm coming in way too hot and I'm giving someone an insane overreaction.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's not actually an overreaction.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's all of the reactions that I did not verbalize coming to a head.
[SPEAKER_00]: For example, this is a semi-fake scenario, but I'm in my bedroom recording this episode.
[SPEAKER_00]: My roommate is on FaceTime with a friend.
[SPEAKER_00]: What I could have done in the past is go into my room, shut the door, start recording, and hope that she gets the hint that I'm recording something, and she should go into her room if she's talking and shut the door.
[SPEAKER_00]: that way I can't hear her conversation in the background and it doesn't disrupt the audio.
[SPEAKER_00]: That would be hoping that she reads my mind.
[SPEAKER_00]: Whereas in her head, she might just be on FaceTime with a friend.
[SPEAKER_00]: I go into my room to record.
[SPEAKER_00]: She's not thinking twice about it.
[SPEAKER_00]: If that were to happen and I could hear in the background, I would start quietly building resentments.
[SPEAKER_00]: Being like, why does she think it's okay?
[SPEAKER_00]: To chat so loudly while I'm recording a podcast just now in this scenario I say hey can I be a bother?
[SPEAKER_00]: Can you go into your room and have this conversation with the door shut so I can't hear the audio?
[SPEAKER_00]: She's like, yeah, okay, no problem at all No problem at all.
[SPEAKER_00]: So now I'm here recording this episode not having to quietly resent something that I could have just so easily Communicated so that's area number two that I need to work on
[SPEAKER_00]: 3 is men.
[SPEAKER_00]: When I'm dating, I do not communicate clearly at all.
[SPEAKER_00]: If I'm interested in someone, I don't say it.
[SPEAKER_00]: If I'm not interested in someone.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't say it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I have left so many men confused and in turn I've been left with confused men and then I'm annoyed.
[SPEAKER_00]: Kanzi Lisby had challenged herself for a friend to challenge her last year to go on 10 dates and 30 days and that had lived in my head for a while and I was thinking maybe one day I'm when I'm feeling out for it that's something I can do.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I decided January is the time I'm going to go on 10 dates in 30 days and I will practice
[SPEAKER_00]: on dates with men.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is going to be a good lesson for me to learn.
[SPEAKER_00]: So in that regard, I'm working on it and in the second regard, it's so easy to let weeks and weeks and months pass by where the only people you talk to on the phone are your friends, your family, only people you go out with are your friends, your family, and then all of a sudden it's been three months and you're like, oh, huh, if I ever wanted a boyfriend, I really haven't put it out there.
[SPEAKER_00]: I have not been flirting, I have not been looking, I have not been
[SPEAKER_00]: making any moves.
[SPEAKER_00]: So this challenge felt like something I wanted to see if I could do.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's currently the 16th of January and I've been on five dates.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm halfway through the month.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm halfway through the challenge and let me tell you.
[SPEAKER_00]: Every time I've told a friend that I'm doing 10 dates and 30 days their response is always you have to vlog this.
[SPEAKER_00]: You have to share this online to a subject article, do an Instagram, do a podcast, whatever it is.
[SPEAKER_00]: and my response has always been, I don't want them to see.
[SPEAKER_00]: What did the guys see?
[SPEAKER_00]: However, now that I'm halfway through the challenge, let me tell you I'm going to do this on Patreon.
[SPEAKER_00]: I will give the high level reflections publicly.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I will give the dirty or details of grievances annoyance frustrations.
[SPEAKER_00]: Gold stars, et cetera, on Patreon.
[SPEAKER_00]: That is what I've decided because I can't keep this to myself guys There are so many things that I've learned upon this journey and I'm halfway I feel like I'm almost done and literally halfway like everything I've just done I have to do that all again date one was someone that I had been out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Nope.
[SPEAKER_00]: Nope We're gonna save this.
[SPEAKER_00]: We'll save that for the Patreon
[SPEAKER_00]: the things that I have learned.
[SPEAKER_00]: One, it's exhausting.
[SPEAKER_00]: I knew that looking on apps would be a bit of a chore.
[SPEAKER_00]: I go back and forth with apps and the first three out of the five were real life people or people I met in the wild and then two were updates and I had to have a friend redo my profile because I was not looking intentionally whatsoever.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not only was my profile, not intentional, the people that I was liking had very clear non-starters on their profile that I was not even acknowledging.
[SPEAKER_00]: Things that my friend knew, which it's so important to have a second set of eyes to look at your dating profile, to make sure that not only are you communicating correctly, but you're looking.
[SPEAKER_00]: what you actually would like to find, and I have learned so much about dating profiles.
[SPEAKER_00]: That and itself could be a whole chapter in this.
[SPEAKER_00]: For example, I'm looking for monogamy.
[SPEAKER_00]: The amount of people that I like that we're looking for non-monogamy?
[SPEAKER_00]: She's like, what?
[SPEAKER_00]: Uh-uh.
[SPEAKER_00]: Or people that on their profile say, unsure of dating goals.
[SPEAKER_00]: She's like, no, no, no.
[SPEAKER_00]: You want someone that sure of their dating goals.
[SPEAKER_00]: One, this dating goal is not what you want.
[SPEAKER_00]: Second, he's not sure.
[SPEAKER_00]: Next, X out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Got it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then let me pull up my profile.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is on hinge.
[SPEAKER_00]: On my profile, I have a full body kind of fun pick, and then I have a face pick.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I have a slightly quirky somewhat
[SPEAKER_00]: Salacious photo that could be taken as an innuendo, but really isn't basically I have a glass of wine sitting in the crack of a bike seat Sort of like putting a glass of wine in a Margella tabby.
[SPEAKER_00]: It has that same energy that would always get likes and then I have a photo of a book that I like And then I have a video of spoon sitting on my lap.
[SPEAKER_00]: Nuzzled and snuggled in me, and then I have a photo with a friend that I look kind of hot in
[SPEAKER_00]: So those are my picks.
[SPEAKER_00]: And honestly, the face pick and the kind of slutty pick and the wine in the bike actually I would say the wine in the bike is my most like photo by far as for prompts one boundary of mine is we're getting dessert after dinner that is to say we're getting dinner.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not even about dessert.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's just communicating.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, we're going out to eat.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not just going to go get a little drink with you now.
[SPEAKER_00]: Will I, yes, because do I actually want to have dinner as a first date?
[SPEAKER_00]: That's kind of a lot, but I just want the precedents set.
[SPEAKER_00]: Second thing.
[SPEAKER_00]: One thing I'd like to know about you is your favorite outdoor activity.
[SPEAKER_00]: I like an outdoorsy guy.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, that was date number three outdoorsy guy.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think we really had a flirty moment in that entire date.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know if he wasn't feeling me or if he's just like not a very, maybe he was nervous.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know, but really outdoorsy guy and I'm like all.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know if we'd be a good match but I would love to go skiing with you.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'd love to go on a hike with you and then this year I really want to go on a date with you.
[SPEAKER_00]: The prompt is this year.
[SPEAKER_00]: I really want to your dot a dot and that is just because my friend's husband said these prompts are just about giving guys and
[SPEAKER_00]: easy way to slide in.
[SPEAKER_00]: To be like, okay, I want to take you on a date.
[SPEAKER_00]: They don't need to be super nuanced.
[SPEAKER_00]: They don't need to be incredibly layered with your most clever thought.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just to give someone an in and an excuse to respond because sometimes liking doesn't really lead to these conversations, so your prompts are your in.
[SPEAKER_00]: then when you're looking through your likes to actually look through where they live if they say they have children if that's something you're willing to be open for if they don't drink don't smoke or if they do drink and do smoke or whatever it's like pay attention to the details when I would just scroll so mindlessly
[SPEAKER_00]: See the first photo to I really would just kind of glaze over the photos and then decide yes or no, and then my friend was looking for my matches like Lexi what the hell and this and it was made After date five so we will see moving forward for date six through ten
[SPEAKER_00]: if these edits become helpful.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, so I've had two updates so far.
[SPEAKER_00]: Three out of the wild dates in the wild dates, two of them have been the same person.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think I'll probably go on a third date with him, but he's driving me crazy right now.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh my god, the phone call that I just had with him.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was like, are men dumb?
[SPEAKER_00]: Are they dumb?
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm so confused.
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, but let me calm down.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's honestly that phone call is what possessed me to say.
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, we took a little break from the podcast for the holiday.
[SPEAKER_00]: No, I have things to say.
[SPEAKER_00]: I want to talk to you because I would have loved to just say there's this 12-wish ritual and how darling and sweet is bad.
[SPEAKER_00]: And La de la de la, here is a calm, welcoming episode, but I'm simultaneously fired up lots of things to say, lots of things.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm feeling good about this year overall.
[SPEAKER_00]: I have my vision board and my goals and my content ideas I have
[SPEAKER_00]: a deep clean out of all my belongings.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm constantly having to declutter my belongings.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's crazy how quickly we accumulate things even though I don't even think of myself as crazy Spender But I still maintain a large collection larger than I'm comfortable with more often than not so
[SPEAKER_00]: Deep cleaning through my shoes and my clothes and rearranging my closet to be visually appealing, but then leaving up wall space, I posted this on Instagram, but I just hung up this steel magnet board, and on here I have little sticky notes.
[SPEAKER_00]: I used to have my vision board, but now I move my vision board to another board that I hung on my wall.
[SPEAKER_00]: That doesn't matter, my boy.
[SPEAKER_00]: I have my constant ideas so I want to make a video.
[SPEAKER_00]: I need to make a video on my empties.
[SPEAKER_00]: I made the video on my journals that I made.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'll talk about that in a second.
[SPEAKER_00]: But I also set up my phone to be a dumb phone and I want to share that.
[SPEAKER_00]: I want to make a little video on that it never gets better.
[SPEAKER_00]: It never gets easier fallacy.
[SPEAKER_00]: When someone is grieving, the thing that I hear all the time is it never gets easier, it never gets easier and I don't think that's a fair thing to say.
[SPEAKER_00]: So I want to make a little piece on that.
[SPEAKER_00]: I want to make a video on making one of my journals and ASMR and so I have these sticky notes up and then once the video is posted I take it down and then my friend Damon Dominique made this 90 day in 365 day planner that I want to fill out.
[SPEAKER_00]: I almost want to get it laminated first because it's just a piece of paper and it looks like the type of thing that I would want to reuse over and over again so I haven't touched it yet and then I liked this magnetic board so much that I purchased another pack of them to put in my bathroom.
[SPEAKER_00]: and maybe I can put girly little affirmations.
[SPEAKER_00]: I want to have visuals because I know myself to be a visual learner.
[SPEAKER_00]: And last year I learned a lot more about my habits in a way that I had kind of forgotten about.
[SPEAKER_00]: So I'm implementing a lot of new things.
[SPEAKER_00]: For example, I'm a self-employed person
[SPEAKER_00]: I self-regulate externally, and I don't know if that is a good way to put it all explained.
[SPEAKER_00]: If I spend my entire day at home, time dissolves.
[SPEAKER_00]: Any sort of time management goes out the window, time is a vortex when I'm at home.
[SPEAKER_00]: Time is concrete, and makes so much sense to me, and my rhythm is a lot more even killed.
[SPEAKER_00]: When I'm outside in the real world and I have my best days when I have to get up and out of the house early It doesn't have to be for something important.
[SPEAKER_00]: It could be literally a dentist appointment and it gets the ball rolling It's just the first domino.
[SPEAKER_00]: I also learned a lot about my eating habits now that I work at Cleo Sometimes throughout the week Cleo has been one of the best things to happen to me It's been so good for me in so many ways.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a boutique in West Hollywood kind of like Beverly Grove area It's on third street
[SPEAKER_00]: I work Fridays and Saturday so you can come by anytime, but my friend Lexi owns the store and I found that when I would go to work, I would have breakfast before I left and then while I was working, I would get a little hungry and I would go get lunch and then when I would get home, I would have dinner.
[SPEAKER_00]: This sounds so normal, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, well when I work for myself at home, I might wake up, have a coffee, marinade on that for hours,
[SPEAKER_00]: then by the time I remember to make something to eat, I'm starving and then I'm not even choosing like great choices.
[SPEAKER_00]: Or I just end up snacking throughout the day and don't have a proper meal and having a place to go to has regulated my appetite in such a good way for me.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I find this is not exactly where I'm going but just a little bonus for me.
[SPEAKER_00]: I find that I look better when I eat more regularly.
[SPEAKER_00]: my body likes the rhythm so another little habit that I've tried to implement because I noticed any time I get off track even if it's just for a few days it puts me a little out of why when I have a little something to eat multiple times day at the same time my body says thank you so so much we're going to give you really even healthy energy and I say thank you so much that's all I've wanted and it wasn't on purpose
[SPEAKER_00]: So I've challenged myself a little habit that I've implemented is just trying to get three good dominoes is how I'm thinking of it like waking up having something with a protein.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hate to say it but you know whether it's a little Greek yogurt, a little eggs, whatever it is, some is a yellow bread with almond butter, jam, just to have something.
[SPEAKER_00]: It doesn't need to be huge.
[SPEAKER_00]: It just like have
[SPEAKER_00]: and then have something and get around 7.30.
[SPEAKER_00]: 7.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes 6.30 if I'm hungry, sometimes 8.30 if it's a reservation.
[SPEAKER_00]: It doesn't matter.
[SPEAKER_00]: It just, the point is, I need to have something good for me three times a day.
[SPEAKER_00]: Anything else fabulous, but I just need those three good Dominoes of something balanced, something nutritious, three times a day to keep me regulated.
[SPEAKER_00]: So,
[SPEAKER_00]: As I'm standing in my room looking around, I'm really put systems in place.
[SPEAKER_00]: I my own mother, I have to treat myself like a child sometimes, understanding my psyche and trying to work with it as opposed to beating myself up for not being like someone else.
[SPEAKER_00]: Like someone who can regulate internally.
[SPEAKER_00]: They don't need to leave their house to feel that they have structure.
[SPEAKER_00]: My structure completely dissolves if I have not left the confines of my home.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't even know what happens.
[SPEAKER_00]: The day is just a blob.
[SPEAKER_00]: Other things I love about Cleo are the level of experimentation I've been allowed, Elizabeth and Lexi, Elizabeth is the other owner of Cleo, have been so gracious, and welcome me with open arms and endless possibilities.
[SPEAKER_00]: If I ever have an idea, there are all ears, I can sit them down, present it, and they're like, cool, let's do it!
[SPEAKER_00]: And they do things fast.
[SPEAKER_00]: They don't need to marinate on an idea.
[SPEAKER_00]: They would rather learn through experimentation in real time, and I think that's amazing and really great for me.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's a boost that I like.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it's so easy to have an idea and marinate on it for so long that you stop liking it and the idea grows pale as opposed to having an idea and seeing
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, to be of time right now, to do it cool, let's give it a shot.
[SPEAKER_00]: And one of those things were journals.
[SPEAKER_00]: The leather-bound travel journals are so popular right now.
[SPEAKER_00]: I have one in my love it.
[SPEAKER_00]: And it seems like the main distributors of them are in Paris, in Vienna, and in Japan.
[SPEAKER_00]: Where can I go to hold one touch one?
[SPEAKER_00]: And I wanted to have one at Cleo, and because I'm such a big journalist and I've always wanted to, I actually did make a journal.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you really want to go through my track record, I'd want it so that I like my mind more than my face on it and maybe some of you listening have it, and that's awesome.
[SPEAKER_00]: Keep that relic, that's so cute or don't.
[SPEAKER_00]: Going back to the decluttering things if it doesn't serve you anymore.
[SPEAKER_00]: Kiss her goodbye.
[SPEAKER_00]: No offense taken But these travel journals.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think they're fantastic in their gorgeous and Elizabeth is a fashion designer Elizabeth Weinstock has all of these amazing pieces and she has these scraps of leather and hide that are so beautiful But they're not big enough to make into a bag or one of the pieces that she typically makes and so she's allowed me to use her scraps to make something into a journal and it's been such a fun
[SPEAKER_00]: exercise to work with my hands.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't get the same satisfaction if I just work on a computer all day.
[SPEAKER_00]: I do get into flow state, but it's nice to have your hands occupied in a way where I'm hammering a hole into leather.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm cutting pieces and sliding journal inserts into it.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's really fun and you can get them at Cleo now.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a
[SPEAKER_00]: A place that you can come in Los Angeles and hold them and they're beautiful luxury pieces So that's been fun and then also we retail my coloring book there Which I'd like to have a coloring club at Cleo that's something we're thinking for January February Just to come in like maybe a little Sunday afternoon
[SPEAKER_00]: Could be a week now.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm still sorting out through the kinks because I love to have an in person event once again going back to just being extroverted.
[SPEAKER_00]: Being chronically online isn't good for my personality type.
[SPEAKER_00]: To only exist on the internet is not where I thrive.
[SPEAKER_00]: I really enjoy the physical world.
[SPEAKER_00]: So throwing things like physical events are great.
[SPEAKER_00]: I just am not a super incredible planner, so I'm looking for some help because like she was also one of the original owners of Monty's Good Burger and they threw things all the time.
[SPEAKER_00]: And she also worked at Coachella for so many years, so she has a ton of experience throwing events.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think she could do it with her eyes closed.
[SPEAKER_00]: What else have I been wanting to tell you?
[SPEAKER_00]: The 10 days and 30 days.
[SPEAKER_00]: It brings up a lot, but I will say I have been communicating more clearly.
[SPEAKER_00]: I have, I'll say it and I'm proud of myself because I'm only two weeks into the year and I think about it constantly.
[SPEAKER_00]: I have it pinned up on my board and what I'm actually going to do is I think I'll rewrite the other 11 wishes just to see them in my eye line.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's something that I'm finding to be really helpful.
[SPEAKER_00]: because as you can see, I have a lot of ideas and I have a lot of interest and I need to keep them top of mine so I don't forget about them and then just get lost in the sauce.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was even thinking about my content and going through just my favorite things that I posted last year, what served me, what did the audience really take to and
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know, I'm really excited for the new year.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm really excited for the new year.
[SPEAKER_00]: So a quick little, hello, how are you doing?
[SPEAKER_00]: I hope you have a happy new year.
[SPEAKER_00]: Welcome to 2026.
[SPEAKER_00]: I missed you guys.
[SPEAKER_00]: I took a break from the vlog and from the podcast just to have a little winter break.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think breaks are healthy and good for us.
[SPEAKER_00]: And if you want to know the details of my first five dates, I will get into them on the Patreon.
[SPEAKER_00]: The Patreon will be linked below in the show notes.
[SPEAKER_00]: Anything else I mentioned.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'll like leave information for Cleo.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think I mentioned too many Proud acts in this episode, so that might be it, but my take talk my Instagram all those things You can find them and thank you guys so much for listening and I will talk to you soon.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm so so Lexi