[SPEAKER_00]: Hello everybody welcome to Heather Shaw is kidding it's me Heather Shaw happy Wednesday.
[SPEAKER_00]: How you doing what a wild roller coaster ride of a week it's been.
[SPEAKER_00]: Huh, Jimmy Kimmel off the air.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now, Jimmy Kimmel's coming back to the air.
[SPEAKER_00]: Autism, that can be cured.
[SPEAKER_00]: Just stop taking Tylenol, you pregnant bitches.
[SPEAKER_00]: The one pain reliever you can take.
[SPEAKER_00]: Stop taking it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Give natural birth.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's how you get rid of autism.
[SPEAKER_00]: Suffer, women.
[SPEAKER_00]: The only way to get rid of autism is if women suffer.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think that's what we're learning.
[SPEAKER_00]: Anyways, we'll get into all of that.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hope you're doing well.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's Wednesday when this is coming out.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm recording on Tuesday who the fuck knows what's going to happen in a day.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, this is crazy.
[SPEAKER_00]: The news is so quick.
[SPEAKER_00]: We could all be raptured by tomorrow.
[SPEAKER_00]: We could all be gone.
[SPEAKER_00]: You'll never hear this.
[SPEAKER_00]: This doesn't play in heaven.
[SPEAKER_00]: This doesn't play and have in this podcast.
[SPEAKER_00]: The only podcasts in heaven are like Gary V in the Joe Rogan experience.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's get into the early up top things.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, I always have to say, thank you.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you write and review this pot, I got to check the reviews and I haven't looked in a minute.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hope there's reviews over there.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you are reviewing this podcast, thank you so much.
[SPEAKER_00]: Five letters, one word, that's all I need from you.
[SPEAKER_00]: What does it guys say it with me?
[SPEAKER_00]: Quief.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's confuse these people when they look at my podcast reviews.
[SPEAKER_00]: Everything just says Quief, I don't understand what this podcast is about.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then there's people that are like, I'm only listening to this podcast because the reviews said Quief and I haven't heard any fucking quiefs.
[SPEAKER_00]: All I've heard is Gypsy Rose Impressions, with a sprinkling of Britney Spears.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, holy shit, cleath!
[SPEAKER_00]: Anyways, join the Patreon if you love this podcast and you can't get enough, join the Patreon.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think we're up to 85, 86 bonus episodes over there every single week, a new episode drops.
[SPEAKER_00]: I tell you my real thoughts on things and I tell you what's going on in my life behind the scenes.
[SPEAKER_00]: Last episode I talked a lot about Rapture Talk.
[SPEAKER_00]: I talked a lot about idiocracy being a reality now, idiocracy the movie is here in real life.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, it's been here for a minute, but the minute that they announced the UFC fight on the White House lawn, I was like, oh no, it's definitely, we're halfway through idiocracy.
[SPEAKER_00]: There's only a few more years until we start watering the plants with Gatorade.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's coming.
[SPEAKER_00]: Patreon.com slash Heather Shaw comedy for $3 a month, you can get access to all those bonus episodes, $5 a month, $10 a month, whatever you choose, wherever you want to donate to this faggot.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, upcoming shows.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's get over to those.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, early October.
[SPEAKER_00]: I am in Eugene, Oregon.
[SPEAKER_00]: Hell, yeah.
[SPEAKER_00]: Love Eugene.
[SPEAKER_00]: Go ducks.
[SPEAKER_00]: Eugene, Oregon and Olsen run comedy.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm in Seattle, Washington for two nights, four shows, two nights at the hereafter.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I'm into coma, Washington, one show.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's going to get sold out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Get those tickets.
[SPEAKER_00]: Tacoma Comedy Club, and then later on I'm at the Boko Black Box in Boko Raton, Florida, please your god get tickets to that if you're around that area.
[SPEAKER_00]: I got a cell Boko Raton.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's so fucking hard to sell there.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just a bunch of old rich boomers.
[SPEAKER_00]: I gotta find the gays.
[SPEAKER_00]: I gotta get the Fort Lauderdale gays out to my show.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'll get them.
[SPEAKER_00]: Tickets at HeatherShawComedy.com.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'll tell you all the cities I'm hitting up at the end of this episode, but I won't bore you with it up top.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, Jimmy Kimmel is back.
[SPEAKER_00]: He was taken off the air for a week.
[SPEAKER_00]: and Disney was hemorrhaging money, and they said, we made a mistake.
[SPEAKER_00]: Whoopsies, whoops, sorry.
[SPEAKER_00]: We were trying to bend the knee to King Trump.
[SPEAKER_00]: We didn't realize that it would hurt our pockets.
[SPEAKER_00]: We didn't think you gave a shit to be honest, I'm surprised, because I don't know anybody that's watching late night.
[SPEAKER_00]: Who is watching late night television?
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, late, I mean,
[SPEAKER_00]: Back in the day, Johnny Carson and David Letterman, those were the best Conan O'Brien, those were the top three I'd say, top three white boys doing it in the late night game.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, it's all white boys doing it in the late night game, but in fact to choose my favorite three white men, Johnny Carson, David Letterman, Conan O'Brien, boom, no contest.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you like Jay Leno, you're a fucking pedophile.
[SPEAKER_00]: No, I'm kidding.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're just not as funny.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, surprise that people gave a shit.
[SPEAKER_00]: I understand that people were outraged about censorship.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's where all the outrage really came from.
[SPEAKER_00]: Because it wasn't from just canceling late night.
[SPEAKER_00]: Because late night's been canceling itself for years.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know who's watching late night as it airs.
[SPEAKER_00]: Late night is a clip package show at this point.
[SPEAKER_00]: where Jimmy Fallon is having a Lububu karaoke sing-off challenge with Jason Bateman or some shit.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're using a hot one's challenge with Miss Piggy.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, you know, that's what late night is.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's for clips that you see on TikTok the next few days on YouTube shorts.
[SPEAKER_00]: You see it when you're taking a shit on the toilet.
[SPEAKER_00]: No one is staying up and watching late night.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, very few people, I know somebody's going to comment, how dare you?
[SPEAKER_00]: I make sure to stay up every night and watch Seth Meyers.
[SPEAKER_00]: I love that little little, so I boy, faggot.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, okay, good for you.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know who's watching late night as it airs.
[SPEAKER_00]: My guesses are people who are doing meth.
[SPEAKER_00]: They just need something to keep the noises in their head out.
[SPEAKER_00]: So they put on Kimmel.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, they used to.
[SPEAKER_00]: People who accidentally fall asleep on the couch.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know that move, you fall asleep on the couch, nine, 10 pm, you wake up, it's midnight, Jimmy Fallon's, you happen about with Addison Ray.
[SPEAKER_00]: You go, oh my God, what am I in a fever dream?
[SPEAKER_00]: What is this?
[SPEAKER_00]: Turn it off, go to your bed.
[SPEAKER_00]: You stumble in your bed.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, people on late night shifts, I guess, if you're on third shift, maybe you're popping on a little late night.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, you have unlimited access to entertainment.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know why you're putting on late night.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is where, unless you're like an 80 year old with dementia, I don't know who's watching late night.
[SPEAKER_00]: If I'm up at 1130, midnight, bored, the last thing I'm doing is trying to go to CBS, ABC and BC for entertainment.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going on my fucking phone where I have it curated to what I like, so I don't have to see jelly roll doing a dance off with Jimmy Fallon in a wet t-shirt contest or wherever the fuck Fallon is doing.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can just go on TikTok and watch a compilation of backyard redneck weddings as got intended.
[SPEAKER_00]: Or I can go on YouTube and watch a long essay on, you know, essay, sexual assault.
[SPEAKER_00]: A video essay on essay.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, literally anything but late.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I don't, I mean, that's, that would be my last entertainment option.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's like if I'm stuck in a hotel room and the only channel that works is ABC, then yeah, I guess I'll watch late night at midnight.
[SPEAKER_00]: My phone is thrown off the roof and not in my, in the vicinity of the room.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I would rather start praying to Jesus than watch late night live.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know who's doing it.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's an old art form, you know?
[SPEAKER_00]: It is the spoken word poetry of entertainment shows.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, I don't know.
[SPEAKER_00]: It seems like it's just a place to sell ads.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a placeholder for ads, spots, you know?
[SPEAKER_00]: It's the same with that's and now.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't, I see SNL skits.
[SPEAKER_00]: and sketches days, two days after it airs, a day.
[SPEAKER_00]: I might enjoy some of them, but certainly not staying up to watch SNL.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was in a TikTok live, and we were talking about SNL.
[SPEAKER_00]: Somebody asked me about it.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I said, I asked them.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said, they would hear actually watch SNL.
[SPEAKER_00]: Very few people did.
[SPEAKER_00]: Some people did.
[SPEAKER_00]: They were younger people.
[SPEAKER_00]: Because my thinking was, who was watching SNL?
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm thinking either like teenagers who are like,
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, it's a Saturday night.
[SPEAKER_00]: They're not like partyers.
[SPEAKER_00]: They're just regular teenagers.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, the cool teenagers in my mind are the teenagers that aren't going out and smoking fentanyl at 18.
[SPEAKER_00]: The cool teenagers in my mind are just like, yeah, it's unbored.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm in Wisconsin.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a Saturday night.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm gonna watch us now.
[SPEAKER_00]: Theater kits, love it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Theater kits teenagers, Midwestern moms.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's it.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's who I think watches us SNL and gets a kick out of it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Your mom, your Midwestern mom watches SNL and goes, this is a hoot.
[SPEAKER_00]: They are a hoot.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh my god, that Colin Joe's tweet is just a cutie.
[SPEAKER_00]: But I don't know who's watching SNL.
[SPEAKER_00]: A lot of the people in the live did say, they were younger people, because I could tell they were like, well, I'm young girl, I watch SNL, because I was like, nobody young watches SNL, and some people were like, I do, but it really depends on the guest.
[SPEAKER_00]: So like if you're a huge Ariana Grande stand in your 19 years old, you might watch us in our life because you love Ariana Grande.
[SPEAKER_00]: But there's no loyalty to the show.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just, oh, this week they have Pedro Pascal and I'm a closeted gay kid in Nebraska and I want a gargle Pedro Pascal's balls.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me watch us in L. I get it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I did that as a kid.
[SPEAKER_00]: Everyone I liked as a kid would never host us in L.
[SPEAKER_00]: That, and it's not because I'm so cool, it's just because I just like, I really, I really like Danielina Jolie as a teenager.
[SPEAKER_00]: I thought she was the best actress in the world.
[SPEAKER_00]: She was gorgeous.
[SPEAKER_00]: She was so cool.
[SPEAKER_00]: She had never host us in Elle.
[SPEAKER_00]: So I never really got that fandom.
[SPEAKER_00]: I also liked Eminem.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think he's ever hosted us in Elle.
[SPEAKER_00]: I did like Justin Timmer, like he would host it a bunch.
[SPEAKER_00]: So I get it a little, but a lot of the times the people I liked, it's like, oh yeah,
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, but I'm happy that Kimmel's back because it does come down the censorship.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm glad that people took a lot of, they took a stand, you know, and I don't expect that from Disney fans.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't expect Disney fans to have working brain cells or, uh, integrity.
[SPEAKER_00]: I really did, I didn't because all I think about Disney people is Disney adults.
[SPEAKER_00]: They don't have integrity.
[SPEAKER_00]: They're at a child's theme park, child free, writing a teacup that was made for a six-year old.
[SPEAKER_00]: They took the express lane and passed a bunch of children for which the ride was intended for and cut them so that they could ride the tea cups with their sad overweight husband.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's what I think a Disney adults.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think I thought all Disney fans were like this.
[SPEAKER_00]: No, a lot of have integrity.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not a huge Disney person.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't have Disney plus.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't have Hulu.
[SPEAKER_00]: But, yeah, I am very proud of all the Disney fans who took a stand, you know, um, I wasn't expecting that.
[SPEAKER_00]: Uh, there was a woman who canceled her $150,000 wedding at Disney, not because she was embarrassed that she was going to have a wedding at Disney once again, a theme park for children.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, where's the line?
[SPEAKER_00]: How come adults can go get married at Disney world?
[SPEAKER_00]: But if I want to bang,
[SPEAKER_00]: What the fuck's that about?
[SPEAKER_00]: It's the same concept.
[SPEAKER_00]: But she canceled her wedding very cool.
[SPEAKER_00]: A lot of, I think the evaluation was the valuation of Disney's loss was reportedly $3 billion.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know if that's completely accurate.
[SPEAKER_00]: Obviously it was enough for Disney to say, OK, just kidding.
[SPEAKER_00]: Just kidding, Kimmel, Kimmel can come back.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's set to return last tonight.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going again recording this on Tuesday.
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's set to return tonight.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think Kim will's going to apologize.
[SPEAKER_00]: I really hope he does.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I think he'll make some funny jokes.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, what happened this past week?
[SPEAKER_00]: You know.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it will be interesting to see if he goes hard on Trump because Trump just announced that he found that the cause for autism and the cure.
[SPEAKER_00]: God, this administration is so efficient.
[SPEAKER_00]: They found the cause and the cure.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, so quickly.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's amazing.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can't wait to talk about that.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know.
[SPEAKER_00]: It'll be interesting.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't really want to harp on what I think he's going to do because by the time you hear this, it's old news.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now it's interesting, he is set to return.
[SPEAKER_00]: and major station owners said they would still keep the show off the airwaves for viewers in thousands of homes.
[SPEAKER_00]: So sinclair and next star media group, they said they're going to continue preempting suspending Kimmel's show in a controversy.
[SPEAKER_00]: They are going to continue not showing it instead they're going to show news programming.
[SPEAKER_00]: God, that's fun.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, what do you want to
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, so they're still they're still standing there.
[SPEAKER_00]: They're they're grown.
[SPEAKER_00]: They're saying no.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's what we're not gonna.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're still not.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're mad.
[SPEAKER_00]: You, you, Matt, we're mad.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're still not going to show it.
[SPEAKER_00]: So it is coming back to ABC, but some affiliates will not be showing it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I have a map here of what that looks like.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's really not that bad.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's about 39 sinclair.
[SPEAKER_00]: is going to withhold at 39 stations across 18 states and the district of Columbia.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not that much.
[SPEAKER_00]: Really, it's two cities in California, a city in Oregon, three cities in Texas, two cities in Florida, Alabama, it's mostly East Coast, but not Northeast, you know, mid-East, is we'll say like the Carolina's Georgia, Alabama.
[SPEAKER_00]: places where they're not watching Kimmel right um it's not that bad it's thirty nine stations that aren't going to be showing it due to sinclair I don't know if they have a map for um uh for the other one next star but it doesn't seem like like who gives a shit
[SPEAKER_00]: and again, who is watching Jimmy Kimmelife.
[SPEAKER_00]: We'll see if his ratings skyrocket because people want to know what he's going to say.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe he should be removed every week to keep those ratings going.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not a fan of late night TV, but I am a fan of the first meant for free speech.
[SPEAKER_00]: Is that the first amendment?
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm a fan of free speech, you know, I talk about my Patreon, if you really want to know my real thoughts on it all, I'm not going to bore the Patreon members who listen every week to the bonus episode, I told them I wasn't going to repeat things, hopefully.
[SPEAKER_00]: on the main episode, because I do have integrity, and I like to make sure that my content is always fresh.
[SPEAKER_00]: So if you want to hear more about my thoughts on the whole thing, go on over to patreon.com slash Heather Shaw comedy and sign up or buy an episode.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know.
[SPEAKER_00]: But it is good to see that money talks,
[SPEAKER_00]: It works, boycotting works, and that's really all that these people care about at the end of the day.
[SPEAKER_00]: Nothing motivates these people to get out of bed to make decisions more than money.
[SPEAKER_00]: You could hold up their children at gunpoint in front of them and say, I'm going to shoot and they'd say, hey, do what you got to do.
[SPEAKER_00]: But the minute you start bleeding them dry of money, they make moves.
[SPEAKER_00]: All of these corporations, all of these leaders, they're soulless and they're motivated by money.
[SPEAKER_00]: So you own the power.
[SPEAKER_00]: Just remember that.
[SPEAKER_00]: Your pocketbook owns the power.
[SPEAKER_00]: We as the consumers own the power.
[SPEAKER_00]: How quickly we forget that.
[SPEAKER_00]: Unless it's times like these where we show up and fight for Jimmy Kimmel.
[SPEAKER_00]: Can't believe that's a thing we have to do, huh?
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, Charlie Kirk had his memorial.
[SPEAKER_00]: I talked about his memorial on my Patreon episode.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not going to go too deep into my thoughts on that as well, but a fun little story that always happens at these huge Republican conservative meetups.
[SPEAKER_00]: What happened?
[SPEAKER_00]: Grindr had a huge outage.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yep.
[SPEAKER_00]: That happens.
[SPEAKER_00]: We saw it at the RNC.
[SPEAKER_00]: It happened in Arizona during Charlie Kirk's Memorial Service.
[SPEAKER_00]: Grinder had a massive outage once again.
[SPEAKER_00]: Reports claim that tens of thousands of people attended the memorial for the controversial podcaster.
[SPEAKER_00]: Who by the way,
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, you know, Republicans were very quick to try to blame Kirk's killing on trans people, you know, because if trans people want anything, it's not equality and respect, it's murder, you know, those trans murderers.
[SPEAKER_00]: But there were over 168 reports of grinder outages on Sunday evening during the memorial.
[SPEAKER_00]: That is an increase from the baseline number of two.
[SPEAKER_00]: Usually there's about two reported outages.
[SPEAKER_00]: This time during the memorial 168, there was a huge heat map that showed a large concentration of those grinder problems taking place in the Glendale area.
[SPEAKER_00]: And where did his memorial service take place?
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to let you guess.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, yeah, no, you're right.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's Glendale Arizona, interesting.
[SPEAKER_00]: The outages continue through Monday morning at one point reaching over 200 reports.
[SPEAKER_00]: I love that.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's such a fun little thing.
[SPEAKER_00]: One TikTok are also shared a screenshot allegedly from the Sniffy's app at State Farm Stadium where it was overrun with people.
[SPEAKER_00]: large amount of gathers on the Sniffy's app.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you don't know, Sniffy's is like Grindr.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know what the difference is.
[SPEAKER_00]: The name is very off-putting.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know what gay man said.
[SPEAKER_00]: I know I'm gonna make a hookup app and call it Sniffy's.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know if I don't think there's any kink involved like a specific kink with this website.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it's just another hookup app, but they just decided to go with Sniffy's.
[SPEAKER_00]: That sounds like a dog meet-up app.
[SPEAKER_00]: Like the best dog parks in town.
[SPEAKER_00]: Check out Sniffy.
[SPEAKER_00]: See if there's a dog park near us for the dogs.
[SPEAKER_00]: They want to get their sniff on.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a very weird name for a gay hook-up app.
[SPEAKER_00]: But...
[SPEAKER_00]: This always happens, you know.
[SPEAKER_00]: The call is coming from inside your asshole.
[SPEAKER_00]: These Republican men, these Republican mostly men, I know we all saw hunting lives and think Republican women are really at it, but it's really men.
[SPEAKER_00]: There were Republican men hate trans people.
[SPEAKER_00]: They hate what they get boners to.
[SPEAKER_00]: It really upsets them when they get a boner every time they see a trans drag queen on drag race.
[SPEAKER_00]: They hate gay people, because once again, they hate themselves.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, think of something you don't like in life.
[SPEAKER_00]: How about olives?
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't like olives.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't like pickles, not a lesbian joke.
[SPEAKER_00]: Really, I don't like pickles the food.
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you know how often I spend my time talking about pickles and telling everybody how much I hate pickles?
[SPEAKER_00]: I spend zero percent of my time.
[SPEAKER_00]: Only maybe one percent.
[SPEAKER_00]: When somebody offers me a pickle, I go, no, thanks.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't like pickles.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's it.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's how much I talk about pickles.
[SPEAKER_00]: You think if you didn't really like something, or it really wasn't part of your life, and you didn't want it to be a part of your life, you probably wouldn't talk about it much, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: But so many Republican men are always talking about gays.
[SPEAKER_00]: trans people, gay people, trans people, gay people.
[SPEAKER_00]: Why are you talking so much about something you really don't like?
[SPEAKER_00]: When in your life do you ever do that?
[SPEAKER_00]: Outside of, I don't know, never.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe these Republican men are closeted and trying to run away from the fact that they are the thing they hate.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe you wouldn't talk about gay people so much, if it gay people weren't in your mind, 24, 7.
[SPEAKER_00]: Because you want to be inside another gay person, or you want another gay person inside of you.
[SPEAKER_00]: Just a coincidence, I don't know.
[SPEAKER_00]: I just don't spend my time thinking about things that I want nothing less to do with.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, I don't go around talking about, um, straight men, ban the straight men.
[SPEAKER_00]: Although I'd get behind that, ban the straight men, the straight men are gross.
[SPEAKER_00]: Straight men love his weird.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, you know, I don't want to be a straight man.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just not my thing.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't spend a lot of time thinking about straight men.
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank God.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, because I don't care.
[SPEAKER_00]: But if you cared, you talk about them.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's the same with reactions to a question.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you went up to a secure man, and you said, is Brad Pitt hot?
[SPEAKER_00]: that guy would probably give you his honest opinion because he's a secure man.
[SPEAKER_00]: You gotta watch out for the men where you say, is Brad Pitt hot and they go, you know, I'm not gay, what the for overreaction deflection is their way of distancing themselves from the inside thoughts in their head.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you know any men in your life who act like that who wildly overact overreact to a simple, is this person an attractive man?
[SPEAKER_00]: A secure man will say, yes, Brad Pitt is attractive because it doesn't bother him.
[SPEAKER_00]: He doesn't he's not thinking about gargling his balls, looking his asshole clean.
[SPEAKER_00]: So far this thing from his mind, he can safely say, yes, that man's attractive.
[SPEAKER_00]: So what?
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not gay.
[SPEAKER_00]: But a man who is deeply trying to convince everybody that he is so straight is going to freak the fuck out because in his head he's going, yes, I love Brad Pitt.
[SPEAKER_00]: Brad Pitt so fucking hot.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would fucking suck his dick until it comes dry.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would drain who's balls.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would drain his balls.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't let them know you would drain.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't let anybody know you would drain Brad Pitt's balls.
[SPEAKER_00]: I love to test it on the men in my life.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I can safely say.
[SPEAKER_00]: All of the guy friends I have, comics especially, they're all good guys, they are not stable in life, but they are sexually secure.
[SPEAKER_00]: They don't give a shit, they'll say yes Brad Pitt's hot, who fucking cares?
[SPEAKER_00]: They get up and they, they're a professional clown, they're very secure in their sexuality.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think I have any men who are friends in my life who would flip out and go, oh, ew, I'm not kidding because I don't want to be your friend.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're a fucking faggot.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I just don't want to be a weird deflecting closet, you know, I can't be around that energy.
[SPEAKER_00]: If a faggot's gonna be in my life, they're gonna be out and proud bitch.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can't do all this closet and bullshit.
[SPEAKER_00]: But try it, try it on the menu, know, in your life.
[SPEAKER_00]: My dad, here's the thing, my dad, uh, I think my dad might be an outlier, because I think he'd go, ew, no, but I don't think my dad's gay.
[SPEAKER_00]: My dad is, there's not a gay bone in that man's body.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's, there's three, uh, me and my siblings are gay.
[SPEAKER_00]: My dad's the straightest one in our family for sure.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think he genuinely is just like, ew, like he has that reaction.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're just like, ew, but he's not like, ew, no, what the fuck?
[SPEAKER_00]: He's just like, ew.
[SPEAKER_00]: Shout out to my very straight dad from having very gay kids.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's gotta be a hard life room out there in those streets.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, well, well, Trump did a very, you know, Trump did a very good press conference.
[SPEAKER_00]: And we're going to uncover why he did this press, we're going to go over it.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's clear to anybody with more than three working brain cells.
[SPEAKER_00]: Why exactly, President Trump came out and gave a spirited press conference on science when the man himself could not pronounce a seat of minifin, a seat of minifin, a seat of minifin, the thing in Thailand, all the thing we all know about our whole lives, a seat of minifin.
[SPEAKER_00]: Trump could not pronounce that word.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was the first time he saw the word and it was very fun to watch him uh sound it out like Elmo.
[SPEAKER_00]: Up there couldn't he couldn't have ran that script before the press conference by the way.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you don't know, I'm talking about he got up there uh to talk about how Tylenol taken during pregnancy causes autism.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then he also offered a cure.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're going to go over very shortly.
[SPEAKER_00]: But that was the premise, Tylenol.
[SPEAKER_00]: Number one, Tylenol is a brand name for the drug, acetaminophen, and something else.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't really know what else is in Tylenol, but it's not like Tylenol is not the scientific ingredients inside of Tylenol.
[SPEAKER_00]: Tylenol is just the brand name.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, so already it doesn't make any sense.
[SPEAKER_00]: So he's just attacking a brand name of this medicine.
[SPEAKER_00]: But acetaminophen is in Tylenol, which is what he should have been referring to.
[SPEAKER_00]: There shouldn't have been really any mention.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe other than saying like acetaminophen is the cause.
[SPEAKER_00]: It can be found in Tylenol, but he was really going hard on Tylenol.
[SPEAKER_00]: He couldn't pronounce acetaminophen.
[SPEAKER_00]: He got up there and he said,
[SPEAKER_00]: uh... what did he say uh... there's been a uh... possible association between uh... autism and children and the use of ace echo all right now let's sound it out now that's what he said all right let's work this out now act a man of tone in
[SPEAKER_00]: There's been a correlation between autism and that command at Donan.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, let's work.
[SPEAKER_00]: And here's somebody else I go.
[SPEAKER_00]: I see them in a van.
[SPEAKER_00]: As a man of fin.
[SPEAKER_00]: He finally nailed it down.
[SPEAKER_00]: I see them in a van.
[SPEAKER_00]: Say that.
[SPEAKER_00]: Is he's really he's going hard on Tylenol he said don't take Tylenol fight like hell not to take it As if it's fentanyl by the way he's talking about Tylenol as if it's fucking fentanyl Sir you what we have a giant Epidemic of fentanyl overdoses in this in this country and he's up there going fight like hell not to take Tylenol fight like hell
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't take the acataminonin, you don't want the acataminamin in your body.
[SPEAKER_00]: All right, now let's, let's, let's, let's, let's sell this out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's sell this out acataminonin, acetase is awesome.
[SPEAKER_00]: You don't want the acetase to season us.
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, so don't take the island, uh, Thailand all he says.
[SPEAKER_00]: Autistic people show differences, uh, there is no, let me, I'm just reading this, um,
[SPEAKER_00]: article, sorry, I'm not, I'm, I'm Trump, I prepared very little.
[SPEAKER_00]: James Qsack, Chief Executive of Autisticah, which sounds like a theme park for autistic people, but it's not, I'd be so funny if that, um, Disney Lady was like, I have canceled my wedding at Disney World.
[SPEAKER_00]: We've pulled out our $150,000 and instead we're going to get married at Autisticah.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just a giant theme park with trains and stamps and special interest and temple grandan temple grandans they're greeting you cow whispering her way through the park that's a very fun.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would love to go to Autisticah.
[SPEAKER_00]: Anyways, James Cousac, Cousac, the chief executive of Autistica, Autistica is an Autism Research and Campaigning Charity in London.
[SPEAKER_00]: James is also Autistic, so I think he knows the thing or two.
[SPEAKER_00]: He says there's no definitive evidence to suggest that Paracet, uh-oh, Paracet, Sadimal, Paracetimal, am I saying that right?
[SPEAKER_00]: Am I Trump?
[SPEAKER_00]: They got, I'm not the country, uh, the president of a fucking country and said I'm just
[SPEAKER_00]: Perisetable use in mothers is a cause of autism when you see any associations, they're very, very small.
[SPEAKER_00]: At the heart of this is people trying to look for simple answers to complex problems, seems to me that autism is genetic, it seems like a gainous, you know, I can say that.
[SPEAKER_00]: Me and my siblings are all gay, I think it's genetics.
[SPEAKER_00]: um... my father had no part in it my sister is my half sister we have different fathers my mom has a gay fucking uterus okay she's got a gay uterus she made us all my dad didn't have part in making all three of us gay okay that's all my mom so i think it's a bit genetic shout out to my mom's gay eggs those gags uh... another clinical terrorologist uh... said the evidence is not supportive casual link between the
[SPEAKER_00]: Now I'm like, am I seeing a seat of minifin wrong?
[SPEAKER_00]: Now I'm like really nervous because I'm making fun of Trump so much that I'm like I see a minifin Okay, thank God, we're good, I see a minifin I'm like, oh my God I can't be making fun of Trump and also being like, Akkataka and Tuka It don't take the Akkataka, Duka All right, so
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a very laughable claim.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's also, I don't think their intention is to make women suffer for once.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it just happens to be it.
[SPEAKER_00]: What it happens to be.
[SPEAKER_00]: Tylenol is the only safe pain reliever fever reducer women can take during pregnancy.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's very dangerous to take ibuprofen, or it's just not good for pregnancy to take ibuprofen, addvill, these things.
[SPEAKER_00]: So women are really only allowed to take Tylenol, I see them in a fin.
[SPEAKER_00]: during pregnancy and you're going to take that away from women.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just a fun little collateral damage in what's really going on here.
[SPEAKER_00]: What is really going on here?
[SPEAKER_00]: At the heart of everything Trump does.
[SPEAKER_00]: What is it about?
[SPEAKER_00]: It's about money.
[SPEAKER_00]: Once again, buddy, these people live and die by money.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's all they see.
[SPEAKER_00]: The man made printed up pieces of paper.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's what they've decided to dedicate their entire lives to worrying about money.
[SPEAKER_00]: causes autism.
[SPEAKER_00]: He also said, but wait, we have a cure.
[SPEAKER_00]: We have a treatment plan.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm up here.
[SPEAKER_00]: The other funny thing he said that I loved so much was that he was like, you know, they don't have a lot of autism in, uh, I'm miscommunities.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, not no autism in the I'm miscommunities.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I said, that's very interesting.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said, why did there's no autism?
[SPEAKER_00]: The I'm misch don't have autism.
[SPEAKER_00]: What's that about?
[SPEAKER_00]: Very interesting.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, I said,
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, the obvious don't have electricity, sir.
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you think they're going to the fucking doctor and getting diagnosed for their special interest in fucking world war, too?
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you think that's happening?
[SPEAKER_00]: Very interesting.
[SPEAKER_00]: The obvious, I don't know.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe they're under something here.
[SPEAKER_00]: They don't have any autism in that community.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, they ride their little buggies.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, they churn their butter.
[SPEAKER_00]: And nobody over there, crazy autism.
[SPEAKER_00]: They don't take ac attack at Tony.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just crazy.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, the omniscient don't have a lot.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, I'm sure they don't really go out and get diagnosed for things that aren't like fatal.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, when an omniscient person has a special interest, they're just a little quirky.
[SPEAKER_00]: They're just a little extra omniscient.
[SPEAKER_00]: No one's going, do you think he has autism?
[SPEAKER_00]: No, please.
[SPEAKER_00]: The Trump administration announced a treatment for autism during the press conference here's where we get into why they did this, guys.
[SPEAKER_00]: During the press conference, President Donald Trump and Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy, the man who sounds like a fork stuck in a garbage disposal, that guy had the health and human services great.
[SPEAKER_00]: They said that the FDA is going to approve the drug, Luko foreign.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think I'm pronouncing that right.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I really hope I'm not.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't respect this drug.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it's a very, it's an MLM drug.
[SPEAKER_00]: OK, Luko foreign.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's look how to pronounce it so that we're doing the good investigative research journalistic approach.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know what I'm saying.
[SPEAKER_00]: How do you pronounce it?
[SPEAKER_00]: Pronunciation.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wow, there's like, here we go.
[SPEAKER_00]: Luke of Oran, all right, I was right.
[SPEAKER_00]: Luke of Oran.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is going to treat autism.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a philinic acid supplement.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a supplement.
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you know what I think of?
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you know what I what I see when I look at supplements?
[SPEAKER_00]: Now I take vitamin D because I did blood work.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then a doctor said, Hey, you have very low vitamin D. Take a vitamin D supplement.
[SPEAKER_00]: Please do your god bitch.
[SPEAKER_00]: Go out in the fucking sun once in a while.
[SPEAKER_00]: Would you your dumb vampire bitch?
[SPEAKER_00]: You vegan ho.
[SPEAKER_00]: But most supplements when I look at supplements,
[SPEAKER_00]: It's all bullshit.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think a lot of supplements work.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it's very expensive urine.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're just going to put it in your body.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're going to pee it out, and you're going to get on with your day losing money.
[SPEAKER_00]: But Kennedy touted it as an exciting therapy that may benefit large numbers of children who suffer from autism.
[SPEAKER_00]: So they're pushing this lukewarm.
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you know who makes lukewarm?
[SPEAKER_00]: Who makes the lukewarm?
[SPEAKER_00]: Are they not going to say it in this article?
[SPEAKER_00]: This people fucking magazine article.
[SPEAKER_00]: I swear to fucking God if they don't connect the dots here, we go.
[SPEAKER_00]: Some have raised issues with the potential for the Supplements Recommendation to financially benefit some within the government.
[SPEAKER_00]: Here is the corruption.
[SPEAKER_00]: The medication look of Warren is sold by Dr. Osis Supplement Company.
[SPEAKER_00]: I Herb.
[SPEAKER_00]: The dumbet, that is an MLM, that is a multi-level marketing name if I've ever heard it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I herb, that's something that a million fucking housewives across the Utah state lose their savings to.
[SPEAKER_00]: I herb.
[SPEAKER_00]: Janice, you just gotta get this, I hope it is just... Every time I take it, I feel so much more fresh.
[SPEAKER_00]: I feel good, you know, I don't feel like I have three kids that fucking cling to me for everything because my husband does not the normal day, so I just take this, I, I'm telling you, it's better than quay ludes!
[SPEAKER_00]: It's the new quay ludes, Janice, I'm...
[SPEAKER_00]: Dr. Oz sells this fucking supplement and it all the sudden it's the cure for autism.
[SPEAKER_00]: Hey, if you take this loop of Vernon, what is it called?
[SPEAKER_00]: Luka Vonan, what is it called?
[SPEAKER_00]: What is it fucking called?
[SPEAKER_00]: I need a god damn fucking producer.
[SPEAKER_00]: Luke of orange.
[SPEAKER_00]: Hey, if you take this Luke of orange, hey guys, it's Dr. Oz here.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know the doctor that Oprah Winfrey propped up, boy, she really likes propping up real hokey fucking doctors.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dr. Phil, you to agree, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: Ugh, you got to get the snake out of the grave.
[SPEAKER_00]: So if you want, yeah, okay, thanks, Dr. Phil.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dr. Phil, you're so good at exploiting people, and I'm Dr. Oz.
[SPEAKER_00]: I love to give you bullshit science.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not real.
[SPEAKER_00]: Here's how you can lose 350 pounds in a week.
[SPEAKER_00]: Just drink orange juice from my company.
[SPEAKER_00]: Look, far in.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, my I herb.
[SPEAKER_00]: My company is I herb.
[SPEAKER_00]: It sounds very close to an iPhone.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dr. Oz is a fucking scam artist, Grifter.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can't believe he had a TV show.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oprah Winfrey has done nothing but elevate mediocre white men who don't deserve it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dr. Oz holds a government position as well.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's completely corrupt.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dr. Oz holds a government position overseeing the centers for Medicare and Medicaid services.
[SPEAKER_00]: The things we're all gonna cut.
[SPEAKER_00]: What does he have to oversee?
[SPEAKER_00]: The cutting of said services?
[SPEAKER_00]: What is he overseeing there?
[SPEAKER_00]: Does he just watch old people die?
[SPEAKER_00]: Old and poor people die is that his job?
[SPEAKER_00]: Throwing eye her products at them saying,
[SPEAKER_00]: Think about that.
[SPEAKER_00]: A government health official is tied to the very supplement company that benefits from RFK and Trump's bogus cure.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is not public health.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's corruption dressed up as wellness.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I'm telling you, these Epstein files have got to be so fucking atrocious.
[SPEAKER_00]: I cannot imagine what's in them, and also, I don't care what side of the aisle you're on.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't give a fuck.
[SPEAKER_00]: I love all people, I love my smart people, I love my dumb people, I'll let you decide which side is which.
[SPEAKER_00]: The Trump administration thinks we are all very, very dumb and gullible in ignorant, though to not see through this.
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
[SPEAKER_00]: about this.
[SPEAKER_00]: It is very clearly out there.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not, I'm not, I'm not on some conspiracy Reddit thread.
[SPEAKER_00]: People magazine is going, hey, just so you know the cure for autism is just some supplement that Dr. Oz, who also holds government position, is now shilling out.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is all just a money grab.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hope Thailand all suits the fuck out of the Trump administration.
[SPEAKER_00]: He could have got away with it by saying, it's the ecotone, don't take the ecocene in the minivan.
[SPEAKER_00]: But instead he had a blast Tylenol, because in order for this work, this little grift, people have got to recognize Tylenol bad.
[SPEAKER_00]: Tylenol calls cause autism.
[SPEAKER_00]: They also don't want people with autism in this country, because
[SPEAKER_00]: Autistic people generally, and I'm saying generally, I'm not saying this is veerly autistic to people.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said this online, and there are a bunch of mothers going, how dare you make it is severely autistic, and he's dumb as a door-na.
[SPEAKER_00]: I understand there's levels of autism, it's a spectrum of the fucker.
[SPEAKER_00]: I get it.
[SPEAKER_00]: But most people that have autism that can lead independent lives, they have a high IQs.
[SPEAKER_00]: I understand there is outliers.
[SPEAKER_00]: Use your fucking brain.
[SPEAKER_00]: Most people who are autistic and can leave independent lives also lead fulfilling lives and they have high IQs.
[SPEAKER_00]: Most have high IQs, so many score in the gifted range.
[SPEAKER_00]: They do not want high IQd mother fuckers.
[SPEAKER_00]: They're trying to stomp this autism out.
[SPEAKER_00]: They hate autism.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's their kryptonite.
[SPEAKER_00]: People with high IQs who crave social justice who can see through narcissism,
[SPEAKER_00]: Anyways, keep taking the Tylenol, you should want your kid to be a little autistic, you know, seriously.
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, let's get into our ad reads, already been 40 fucking minutes, what a hot episode, guys.
[SPEAKER_00]: What a hot fucking episode, huh?
[SPEAKER_00]: I've been yelling my face off.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hope this audio doesn't sound too bad.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Well, well, all right, some sad news here that I just stumbled upon this morning.
[SPEAKER_00]: James Vanderbeek is very sick.
[SPEAKER_00]: James Vanderbeek from Dawson's Creek.
[SPEAKER_00]: That rhymes, that's fun.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sounds like an M&M song.
[SPEAKER_00]: James Vanderbeek from Dawson's Creek.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't realize how sick he was.
[SPEAKER_00]: I've not been staying up on the sick men in Hollywood.
[SPEAKER_00]: I love James Vanderbite.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's always seemed like a really good guy on problematic king.
[SPEAKER_00]: And this goes for Eric Dane as well.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think Eric Dane has hadn't had any problematic issues.
[SPEAKER_00]: Eric Dane has ALS and it's progressing very rapidly.
[SPEAKER_00]: You may know Eric Dane from being the father in euphoria.
[SPEAKER_00]: The father of Jacob Elorides character.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't really remember what these characters are called because euphoria airs every once every five years.
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's hard for me to remember other than ruin jewels, obviously.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, but Eric Dean was also in, uh, Grey's Anatomy, McSteamy, I believe was his nickname.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, Eric Dean, it was just seem it's very depressing to see where he's at his ALS.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, I believe it's ALS, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm really second guessing myself on everything because the acataminone in is really gotten in my head where I'm like, am I saying this right?
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, it is, uh,
[SPEAKER_00]: ALS is a progressive neurodegenerative disease, degenerative disease, it's clearly leading to muscle weakness, he's got some paralysis, it's very depressing, he's losing a speech, it's fucking sucks, it's a disgusting disease,
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, why can't other people have ALS instead of a good actor who's been on problematic in his life?
[SPEAKER_00]: Has Eric Dane been problematic?
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's see.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not excusing his ALS, but I really did think his controversies include a nude tape scandal Who cares?
[SPEAKER_00]: Who gives a shit?
[SPEAKER_00]: We all take nude tapes, whatever, and it was in 2009.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's like statute limitations on my giving a fuck.
[SPEAKER_00]: 2011 painkiller addiction.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's on him.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't really give a shit.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's it.
[SPEAKER_00]: So he had a new tape with his wife and another woman and then he had a painkiller addiction.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, no, what a monster.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, I'm talking problematic like beats women, uh, you know, abusive, uh, said vial things about, you know, minorities, you know, things like that.
[SPEAKER_00]: So Eric Dean is an angel in my eyes.
[SPEAKER_00]: Uh, if you have a painkiller addiction, you're not a bad person, obviously.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, and if you like to have sex and tape it, so what bitch, that's your fucking free will.
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's really sad to see Eric Dane for, I guess, progressing the disease progressing.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's sad to see the disease progressed so much to the point where he's making videos for, I saw a makeup video for an ALS foundation that he's a part of, and his speech is already going, you know, that he obviously has to be propped up to sit a certain way.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just fucking sucks.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a really bad disease.
[SPEAKER_00]: You wonder why other, why can't evil people get this?
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm sure they do, but,
[SPEAKER_00]: You know what I'm talking about?
[SPEAKER_00]: It'd be really nice to see some people with some ALS diagnosis.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, it just sucks.
[SPEAKER_00]: It sucks.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then James Vanderbeek, I didn't realize how sick he was.
[SPEAKER_00]: I guess I just didn't, I wasn't aware he has, uh, he has colorectal cancer, colorectal cancer, um, which I think is a rough one to have.
[SPEAKER_00]: And he made a surprise appearance at a Dawson's Creek reunion on tape.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, he, he videotaped his message for the, uh, Dawson's Creek reunion.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now I love James Vanderbilt.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'd never really watch Dawson's Creek.
[SPEAKER_00]: I wasn't really a teen soap opera kind of person in Dawson's Creek and one tree hill.
[SPEAKER_00]: All that stuff was a little teen soap opera for me.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was watching Jackass, like a real 12 year old boy.
[SPEAKER_00]: But I really liked him and don't trust the being in apartment 23.
[SPEAKER_00]: He played himself.
[SPEAKER_00]: He sat a rise to himself.
[SPEAKER_00]: He seems like a really good guy, not problematic at all.
[SPEAKER_00]: Very sweet, family guy.
[SPEAKER_00]: Just a good guy.
[SPEAKER_00]: It sucks to see what he looks like now with his color act delcancer.
[SPEAKER_00]: He did make a surprise virtual appearance.
[SPEAKER_00]: He gave a...
[SPEAKER_00]: a message via video to the people who showed up to the Dawson's Creek reunion charity event.
[SPEAKER_00]: It didn't look good.
[SPEAKER_00]: It looked very sad.
[SPEAKER_00]: He does not look good guys.
[SPEAKER_00]: And what a loss.
[SPEAKER_00]: This guy's young.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm sure he's 48 years old.
[SPEAKER_00]: forty eight and I think he's got like six kids the guy he's he like he loves family clearly he's not like Nick Cannon where he's making fourteen and hopped around from vagina of a giant into do it i mean he has six kids with one woman i believe in he just really loves family um...
[SPEAKER_00]: and uh... you know it's it just sucks it really sucks uh... he says i've been looking forward to this night for months and months ever since my angel michelle william said she was pretty it together i can't believe i'm not there i can't believe i don't get to see my cast mates my beautiful cast in person he thanked his fans guys i'm at
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just completely devastating to see what he looks like now.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you type in James Vanderbeek, Dawson's Creek Room, and you'll see a picture of him.
[SPEAKER_00]: It fucking sucks.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's so gant.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just crazy how cancer just sucks the identity out of you.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you were to ask me who that was in that picture, I don't think I could tell you that was James Vanderbite.
[SPEAKER_00]: Obviously, he's still got the James eyes, but he's just so gone.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, he probably weighs less than me.
[SPEAKER_00]: He continued, and I just want to stand on that stage and thank every single person in the theater for being here tonight from the cast of the crew to everybody who's doing anything.
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's been so generous, and especially every single last one of you, you are the best fans in the world.
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you for coming.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know,
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm just worried.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm worried about James Vanderbeek.
[SPEAKER_00]: Uh, I don't know.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know anything about colorectal cancer.
[SPEAKER_00]: He doesn't look great.
[SPEAKER_00]: Some people are commenting online, which you got to take with a green assault after the video they were commenting.
[SPEAKER_00]: Uh, you know, some of you are saying some really dark shit.
[SPEAKER_00]: He won't make it through the year.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, I don't know.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know what, you know, what the outcome is with colorectal cancer.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a type of cancer that affects the large intestine colon and rectum.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's one of the most common types of cancer.
[SPEAKER_00]: The exact causes are unknown.
[SPEAKER_00]: So, you know, they say all the common things, but it's like, you know, what age, obesity, smoking, drinking, physical inactivity, you know, they just throw anything at the wall to say this because this is what could cause it.
[SPEAKER_00]: But I'm wondering what is the life expectancy of a person with colon cancer for localized early stage cancers, the five year survival rate is around 90 to 91% that's great.
[SPEAKER_00]: While for distant metastatic cancers, it can be as low as 13 to 14 so I don't know.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know what stage he has.
[SPEAKER_00]: So stage one, 90% in Sarawari, it's stage two and three, 73 to 74% stage four, 13 to 16.
[SPEAKER_00]: So let's see if there is what stage cancer this James Fanderbicav.
[SPEAKER_00]: He has stage three.
[SPEAKER_00]: He received the diagnosis in late 2024.
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
[SPEAKER_00]: Notice, let's see, his symptoms, maybe this will help anybody.
[SPEAKER_00]: His symptoms, he noticed subtle changes in bowel movements, which prompted him to get a colonoscopy.
[SPEAKER_00]: Gotta get colonoscopy, especially if you're 48.
[SPEAKER_00]: Get colonoscopy.
[SPEAKER_00]: I got to start getting colonoscopies.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think that they should be doing colonoscopies earlier, I believe, but yeah, I don't know the correct age.
[SPEAKER_00]: Look it up, get colonoscopies if you are in that age, obviously.
[SPEAKER_00]: So stage three, going back, that could be promising.
[SPEAKER_00]: could be promising stage two and three civil rights around 73 to 74 for regional disease which includes spread to nearby lymph nodes you know that is promising maybe he just he he'll recover I hope he does I love James Vanderbeak obviously I hope he does it's so fucking sad and he's still on the journey maybe he's he you know maybe he's just in the process of the treatment and that sucks and um
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, he doesn't look great, but that's okay, he can bounce back from that other people have and he's amazing.
[SPEAKER_00]: Adult film star, Lina Bina's cause of death at 24 revealed.
[SPEAKER_00]: Why?
[SPEAKER_00]: I never heard of this lady because I don't watch porn, but I'm not better than you.
[SPEAKER_00]: I just, it's banding Kentucky.
[SPEAKER_00]: Hold on, no.
[SPEAKER_00]: Lina Bina, adult film star has been revealed.
[SPEAKER_00]: The cause of death is revealed.
[SPEAKER_00]: What is it?
[SPEAKER_00]: The Adolfoom's are died due to a pulmonary embolism.
[SPEAKER_00]: She had been experiencing diminished mobility from a recent motor vehicle crash.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, that sucks.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, I did not know Lena Bina, but if you knew Lena Bina, maybe come a little harder today to her.
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
[SPEAKER_00]: The last thing I want to talk about is Ryan Reynolds being a fucking dick.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dude, there's a video of Ryan Reynolds being a dick to Eugene Levy of all people.
[SPEAKER_00]: They're at the Toronto International Film Festival.
[SPEAKER_00]: They're on the fucking carpet doing interviews.
[SPEAKER_00]: And Ryan Reynolds is being a fucking dick dismissing Eugene Levy.
[SPEAKER_00]: Eugene Levy, you want to talk about unproblematic men.
[SPEAKER_00]: they had a tense moment.
[SPEAKER_00]: There was a lip reader online who kind of, you know, I love lip readers.
[SPEAKER_00]: You can tell they're accurate because you're like, oh, yeah, that doesn't line up.
[SPEAKER_00]: But basically what happened was they looked a little tense.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, Levy says to, uh, sorry Ryan Reynolds says to Levy, hey bullshit man, don't know what he said before that to prompt that response from Ryan Reynolds.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't know what Eugene said, but then Eugene Levy said language, you don't need to speak so harsh.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then Ryan said, please don't ever tell me how I can talk to people.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then Levy looked uneasy as Reynolds said something to a woman and said, I'm done here.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're done here.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then he went into being a super nice guy for an interview.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's a fucking freak.
[SPEAKER_00]: Ryan Reynolds is a fucking freak.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's a Canadian fucking freak.
[SPEAKER_00]: He doesn't know who he is.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's the Drake of acting.
[SPEAKER_00]: Drake is the drink of acting as well, but Ryan Reynolds is a fucking poser loser married to Blake Liveley, these fucking cringe are hollocks I mean Jesus Christ, they are such dorks do you know how funny Ryan Reynolds thinks he is?
[SPEAKER_00]: Ryan Reynolds' favorite actor is Ryan Reynolds, Ryan Reynolds' favorite comedian is Ryan Reynolds he thinks he is God's gift to this earth, he's a fucking dork
[SPEAKER_00]: He's a dork, dude, if I was stuck in an elevator with Ryan Reynolds and Drake, I would say, you know, this is the corn balls of the century.
[SPEAKER_00]: These are the corneous motherfuckers, the same people, different fonts, kind of thing.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think Ryan Reynolds has any weird accusations about texting teenagers, so he's got a little edge on Drake there, but
[SPEAKER_00]: Jesus Christ, Drake has the fake abs, Ryan Reynolds has a fake personality.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hope that he's divorcing Blake Lively.
[SPEAKER_00]: I really hope they're going through a divorce right now.
[SPEAKER_00]: That explains why he's such a piece of shit.
[SPEAKER_00]: Does somebody like Eugene Levy fuck outta here?
[SPEAKER_00]: There happened rumors of Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively going through a divorce.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I hope that happens.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I hope Blake Lively goes to fucking, goes in the arms of that Justin Bell don't even.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's see what they're saying here's what they're saying on the internet about the divorce nothing official obviously It's not gonna be in people magazine They're too busy talking about Dr. Oz's company
[SPEAKER_00]: Ryan Reynolds is filing to dismiss Justin Baldoni's defamation lawsuit against him.
[SPEAKER_00]: His argument is first amendment protection.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's fun.
[SPEAKER_00]: We all like it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Basically, though, he's trying to separate himself from Blake Liveley's legal mess.
[SPEAKER_00]: If Blake loses the lawsuit, she could owe millions, and their joint assets could be at risk.
[SPEAKER_00]: What's the best way to protect Ryan's money?
[SPEAKER_00]: A quick divorce.
[SPEAKER_00]: can they divorce fast enough in New York where they live?
[SPEAKER_00]: There's no waiting period, three to six months minimum.
[SPEAKER_00]: In California, it's a mandatory six-month wait, no matter what.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, if Ryan can get dismissed from the lawsuit, he might not need a divorce, but if he stays in it, split could be the best way to keep his money safe.
[SPEAKER_00]: If we are start, if we start hearing about separate accounts, amicable separation statements or sneaky real estate moves, we'll know exactly what's happening.
[SPEAKER_00]: This would explain why he's being a tense, douchebag to somebody like Eugene Levy.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's also just like we can see you.
[SPEAKER_00]: Like if you look at the video of him in Eugene Levy interacting, Eugene's very like, whoa, okay, geez, oh my gosh, trying to diffuse the situation.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then Ryan Reynolds is going to be a dick and then just turned to her reporter and be like, hey, how you doing?
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm so funny.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh god, I hate Ryan Reynolds.
[SPEAKER_00]: I really don't like Ryan Reynolds.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's getting up there for me in sufferable people.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's what I imagine most actors are and I hate that.
[SPEAKER_00]: We'll see.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe the cringe will stay together.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, two cringe people.
[SPEAKER_00]: They get together.
[SPEAKER_00]: That makes sense.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I understand why they're together.
[SPEAKER_00]: Apparently Taylor Swift is gonna testify in this fucking case.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can't believe this thing is still going on.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can't believe there, you know, no settlements have happened or anything.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is just the rumor, though.
[SPEAKER_00]: There is no divorce from any official statement.
[SPEAKER_00]: There's nothing.
[SPEAKER_00]: Ryan Reynolds shares pick with wife Blake Lively, so they're putting out pictures together.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's lovely.
[SPEAKER_00]: Ryan Reynolds, Blake Lively, hit rough patch and missed.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know what, I just realized I don't really care.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't give a fuck about these two fucking pieces of potato.
[SPEAKER_00]: These two french fries.
[SPEAKER_00]: These two fucking unseasoned uncooked fucking french fries.
[SPEAKER_00]: This, these jar, this jar of coleslaw, I don't give a fuck.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hope they figure it out.
[SPEAKER_00]: I really don't care.
[SPEAKER_00]: If I never hear anything about Ryan Reynolds again in Blake Library, I will be a happy mother fucker.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, um, I hope that James Vanderbite gets better.
[SPEAKER_00]: Feel so bad about Eric Dane.
[SPEAKER_00]: Disease, like that sucks.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hope you enjoyed listening to this episode.
[SPEAKER_00]: I had a lot of fun making this one.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was a wild one from top to bottom.
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you so much for listening to this podcast.
[SPEAKER_00]: I really appreciate it.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you don't comment, you know comment.
[SPEAKER_00]: It helps me know who's listening.
[SPEAKER_00]: I really don't know.
[SPEAKER_00]: I tend to just keep going no matter what.
[SPEAKER_00]: So it feels good.
[SPEAKER_00]: And people join the Patreon.
[SPEAKER_00]: I love the support I get from you guys there.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you are hard out for episodes, and you've listened to everything so far, join the Patreon.
[SPEAKER_00]: Patreon.com slash Heather Shaw comedy.
[SPEAKER_00]: You can support me by leaving a rate of review of this podcast.
[SPEAKER_00]: Quaith!
[SPEAKER_00]: And you can support me by coming to a live show.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a very fun show.
[SPEAKER_00]: We hit on hot pop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-oop-
[SPEAKER_00]: God damn, I can't talk, Ryan Reynolds Brain.
[SPEAKER_00]: We hit on current topics, pop culture, politics, unhinged, fun jokes, all material.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't sit there and do an hour of crowdwork.
[SPEAKER_00]: I promise I'm not Matt Wright.
[SPEAKER_00]: No crowdwork for me.
[SPEAKER_00]: Very light crowdwork.
[SPEAKER_00]: If I have crowdwork, it's questions about the city I'm in, like why am I here?
[SPEAKER_00]: Why am I here, Des Moines?
[SPEAKER_00]: Tell me.
[SPEAKER_00]: Um, but it's, it's an hour of full material where else can you get that?
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me tell you where I'm going to be.
[SPEAKER_00]: Get tickets at Heather Shaw comedy.
[SPEAKER_00]: Come out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Have a good time.
[SPEAKER_00]: Bring your boyfriend.
[SPEAKER_00]: They always love me.
[SPEAKER_00]: They think I'm going to suck because I'm a woman.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's just their misogyny talking.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm a new gene organ October 2nd October 3rd and 4th.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm in Seattle, Washington, October 5th.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm into coma, Washington.
[SPEAKER_00]: October 11th.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm in Boca, Thorn, Florida.
[SPEAKER_00]: I say like that because I've been watching me all the way.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was in Miami.
[SPEAKER_00]: October 16th, I'm in Des Moines, Iowa, October 21st, Oklahoma City, October 22nd, Tulsa, October 23rd, Kansas City, October 24th, 25th, Springfield, Missouri.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then later on in the year, I'm in Cleveland, Columbus, Maslen, Ohio, Fort Wayne, Indiana, Chicago, Dallas, Omaha, Richmond, Virginia, Muhammad, Illinois, Portland, Maine, Providence,
[SPEAKER_00]: San Francisco, California just added that show Detroit, Michigan, Apple Tune Wisconsin and Atlanta, Georgia, with more shows to be added at all times.
[SPEAKER_00]: Get tickets to another shot, comedy.com.
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you so much for listening.
[SPEAKER_00]: I love you.
[SPEAKER_00]: Stay gay.
[SPEAKER_00]: All right.
[SPEAKER_00]: See ya.