[SPEAKER_00]: What unbelievable thing did your partner do that made you leave them instantly?
[SPEAKER_00]: Story one.
[SPEAKER_00]: I found out my soon-to-be-wife of three years was hooking up with guys left-right and center while I was deployed in Desert Storm.
[SPEAKER_00]: I only discovered this because a family friend, let's call him Philip, started noticing strange cars in my driveway just three days after I left.
[SPEAKER_00]: He took pictures of her welcoming guys at the front door,
[SPEAKER_00]: I told her a fake return date but came back a week early and stayed with Philip to watch.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sure enough, she still had visitors fully aware I was coming back.
[SPEAKER_00]: I eased up to my bedroom window and heard them going at it for confirmation.
[SPEAKER_00]: Once she left, Philip and I went in and piled all her stuff, plus our intimacy soaked mattress with two used rubbers into the yard.
[SPEAKER_00]: I scattered the pictures of her on top.
[SPEAKER_00]: When she came back, saw the pile, the mattress, and the photos, she completely freaked out.
[SPEAKER_00]: I won everything in the divorce, but I've had trust issues ever since.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Story two, I wanted to send myself a copy of a picture he had taken, so he handed me his phone to find it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Before this, I already knew he had a thing involving feet, and I found a few covert pictures of my own.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't care all that much until I found sneaky photos of my mother's feet.
[SPEAKER_00]: Relationship over.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story three.
[SPEAKER_00]: I booked a hotel room for his birthday and made personalized decorations, hanging them in the room and on the hotel door after getting permission from the hotel.
[SPEAKER_00]: He arrived late, walked right past the decorations and balloons I'd spent days making, and said, I thought you said you were going to decorate the hotel room?
[SPEAKER_00]: While waiting for him, I got ready to go out for drinks, and asked him to zip up my dress so we could leave, but he just dumped his bags and walked out.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was still really confused about where this side of his personality had come from.
[SPEAKER_00]: We went out for drinks, then dinner, and elderly couple was dining next to us, and I complimented the woman on her perfume and outfit.
[SPEAKER_00]: They told us it was their sixtieth wedding anniversary so we had a quick chat and I wish them well.
[SPEAKER_00]: When we left dinner, he berated me for being a lesbian just because I had complimented the old lady.
[SPEAKER_00]: Back at the hotel, I had bought a box of his favorite donuts since he said he didn't like cake and put candles in them.
[SPEAKER_00]: He complained because I'd bought a birthday cake for my dog, but not for him, even though he said he only liked those particular donuts as sweets.
[SPEAKER_00]: I went to run a bath and asked if he wanted to join.
[SPEAKER_00]: He rudely declined than watched football, drank a beer, and fell asleep.
[SPEAKER_00]: I got out of the bath, packed my bag and went home.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story four.
[SPEAKER_00]: He cheated on me, and about a month later when we talked about it, his excuse was that he'd been attracted to that person since he was sixteen and needed to get it out of his system.
[SPEAKER_00]: He said that because the person was extremely mentally unwell, drunk and on substances at the time, he didn't want to miss the opportunity.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story five.
[SPEAKER_00]: He booked a vacation to Greece with a twenty one year old from his ancient Greek class.
[SPEAKER_00]: He had gone back to university at thirty-six and called her his study partner.
[SPEAKER_00]: He left our shared desktop computer open with an email outlining their itinerary.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's how I found out.
[SPEAKER_00]: In retrospect, he wanted out but didn't have the decency to tell me.
[SPEAKER_00]: I moved out that week.
[SPEAKER_00]: Months later, he contacted me asking for forgiveness.
[SPEAKER_00]: He claimed she was a virgin eager to lose her v-card, and that he was just being a nice guy by helping a friend she trusted.
[SPEAKER_00]: He even admitted they had banged on a beach in Mikeanos.
[SPEAKER_00]: What a frigging pig.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story six.
[SPEAKER_00]: While on the trip of a lifetime to Japan, he spent every single day for two weeks straight being miserable, picking fights, and finding all kinds of problems with me to alternately berate and stonewall me.
[SPEAKER_00]: Part for the course with him by that point nearly two years together.
[SPEAKER_00]: On the second to last day of our trip, I woke up feeling a bit under the weather but pushed through.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't want to waste the day.
[SPEAKER_00]: I thought some food would help.
[SPEAKER_00]: We then spent the next two hours circling a shopping mall looking for a sushi place while he took his sweet time didn't check the mall directory and wandered through multiple stores repeatedly.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was clearly another form of abuse punishing me for being sick, I guess.
[SPEAKER_00]: After another humiliating detour through the Gucci store, where both staff and customers shot us dirty looks for our aimless wandering, I was a sweaty, shaky mess.
[SPEAKER_00]: I asked him for the hotel keys so I could go back, shower and rest, but he refused.
[SPEAKER_00]: I begged, explaining how unwell I felt, but he ignored me.
[SPEAKER_00]: In that instant, I knew I was done for good.
[SPEAKER_00]: I had already fallen out of love months earlier over other incidents, but something inside me snapped right then.
[SPEAKER_00]: I turned in left without saying a word.
[SPEAKER_00]: I went back to our hotel alone, got a key from the front desk, separated my things from his, repacked my bags, and left.
[SPEAKER_00]: When he realized what I'd done, he spent the rest of the day calling me terrible names and making threats in our group chat with friends.
[SPEAKER_00]: I am still friends with those people today.
[SPEAKER_00]: He isn't.
[SPEAKER_00]: We were married less than a year, and his drinking kept getting worse.
[SPEAKER_00]: One night, we were out for my friend's birthday in the city.
[SPEAKER_00]: First he got drunk and argued with me about prioritizing her during dinner.
[SPEAKER_00]: Da, it was her birthday.
[SPEAKER_00]: Later, at a bar, to make me angry, he disappeared into the game room at the back, while everyone else danced up front.
[SPEAKER_00]: I let him be thinking he'd cool off and sober up.
[SPEAKER_00]: He didn't.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was touched inappropriately by some guy a few times on the dance floor who wouldn't leave me alone and everyone else wanted to leave.
[SPEAKER_00]: I went to find my husband and he was wasted playing pong against a girl who kept flashing him and having him take body shots off her chest.
[SPEAKER_00]: When I told him I was ready to leave and briefly explain what happened on the dance floor, he accused me of lying about the guy touching me and said I was just jealous of the girl flashing him.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then he told me to find my own way back to the hotel.
[SPEAKER_00]: I tried to explain that we all had a ride, and it was actually him who'd need to find his own way since he was way too drunk.
[SPEAKER_00]: My friend's husband had to strong arm him into leaving with everyone, so we didn't leave a man behind, especially one too drunk to function at that point.
[SPEAKER_00]: He puked all night into the trash can and I slept on the floor so I didn't have to touch him or look at him.
[SPEAKER_00]: I stared at the ceiling all night thinking about the terrible turn my life had taken.
[SPEAKER_00]: I told him the next day.
[SPEAKER_00]: As he puked all over my back seat on the drive home that we were over, he kept trying to make it up to me.
[SPEAKER_00]: We even went to counseling, but I was already checked out.
[SPEAKER_00]: We were officially separated within a couple of months.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think he ever found out the whole story of what he did that night, and I heard from mutual friends that they witnessed him verbally abusing his next girlfriend, now his wife when he was drunk as well.
[SPEAKER_00]: Apparently he told her I was the love of his life, and she could never be like me.
[SPEAKER_00]: What a jerk.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now they have three kids, dodged a life full of that nonsense.
[SPEAKER_00]: story eight.
[SPEAKER_00]: He was taking Adderall and started acting unreasonably paranoid.
[SPEAKER_00]: One day, when I went to take a shower, I found a hidden camera in the bathroom.
[SPEAKER_00]: I remember saying, I hope this is a smashing thing, but it wasn't.
[SPEAKER_00]: He genuinely thought I was texting someone else in the bathroom.
[SPEAKER_00]: I wasn't.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was raising our six-month-old baby and barely left the house.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let alone knew anyone to secretly text.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was completely out of control.
[SPEAKER_00]: He left to go to a gas station in the middle of a fight about the camera, and I left too.
[SPEAKER_00]: I gave him about a month to reach out, act like a dad, or shift focus to our daughter, but he stayed hyper-focused on some phantom dexter.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was supposedly leaving him for.
[SPEAKER_00]: Mind you, I moved in with my mother when I left.
[SPEAKER_00]: After a month of this nonsense, with no change in his attitude or any attempt to focus on our child, I changed my number and deleted my Facebook and all other social media.
[SPEAKER_00]: I moved two hours away to a place where we had no ties.
[SPEAKER_00]: I started completely fresh with my daughter, opened a business and became a very successful single mother to an amazing child.
[SPEAKER_00]: To anyone criticizing me for leaving him with our child, I'd say this there was an open line of communication between him and my mother if he ever wanted it.
[SPEAKER_00]: He never tried to reach out or even knew we had moved until years later.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would have been open to contact if he had reached out, but he never did.
[SPEAKER_00]: There was no way I was going to sit around for nine years wasting my potential and waiting for a call that would never come.
[SPEAKER_00]: We thrived.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story nine.
[SPEAKER_00]: My grandfather offered to buy her lunch while we were out with my family at the local Scottish Games, and she completely flipped out on him.
[SPEAKER_00]: He was stunned, said, never mind, and walked away.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was baffled that anyone would treat my grandfather like that.
[SPEAKER_00]: On the drive home, she started calling him a PDF file and accusing him of hitting on her.
[SPEAKER_00]: She was twenty-one at the time.
[SPEAKER_00]: My grandfather had just wanted to get to know her.
[SPEAKER_00]: I broke up with her on the spot and told her my family meant more to me than she did.
[SPEAKER_00]: The next day, I called my grandfather to apologize.
[SPEAKER_00]: All he said was, you're grown up and can make your own decisions, but I don't think she's right for you.
[SPEAKER_00]: I agree with Grandpa.
[SPEAKER_00]: I totally agree.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story ten.
[SPEAKER_00]: My ex has been is a narcissist, and we had problems throughout our marriage.
[SPEAKER_00]: But the moment I stopped loving him and decided to file for divorce was during couples therapy.
[SPEAKER_00]: The therapist asked why we were seeking help.
[SPEAKER_00]: He told me to go first.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said something like, we're having trouble communicating and we don't seem to see eye to eye anymore.
[SPEAKER_00]: The changes we make don't last and things go back to normal after a few weeks.
[SPEAKER_00]: Less spoken a team oriented way, accepting that we both contributed to the problems.
[SPEAKER_00]: My ex-husband on the other hand spent the entire rest of the session about forty minutes, braiding me and blaming me for every tiny thing that had gone wrong in his life.
[SPEAKER_00]: He even made up things that never happened because he refused to take any responsibility for our issues.
[SPEAKER_00]: He called me selfish and told the therapist I never considered him.
[SPEAKER_00]: He accused me of isolating him from his friend group.
[SPEAKER_00]: When in reality, I had been begging him to reconnect with them after he had chosen on his own to stop talking because of his deteriorating mental health.
[SPEAKER_00]: He accused me of having an affair with my best friend, a very straight woman, even though I am by, and we've been best friends for twenty-six years.
[SPEAKER_00]: His evidence was that we started taking yearly girls' trips that were private and intimate.
[SPEAKER_00]: The first was to visit my sister in New York City and see Broadway shows.
[SPEAKER_00]: The second was to visit her friend in Colorado for hiking.
[SPEAKER_00]: The third is a cruise I am currently on with her.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're having a great time without a single hint of flirting even jokingly because it's just not like that.
[SPEAKER_00]: There were so many more hurtful things he said or made up during those forty minutes, too painful and frustrating to even type out or relive.
[SPEAKER_00]: But it was in that session I realized just how hard I'd been trying to make things work with someone who simply didn't care about me as a person.
[SPEAKER_00]: I lost all affection and love for him right then.
[SPEAKER_00]: I filed for divorce the following week.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story eleven.
[SPEAKER_00]: Among many awful things I tolerated, my last straw with my ex was when she went to Vegas for a week without telling me beforehand.
[SPEAKER_00]: During that week, I noticed she was doing things like getting her nails done, a hair appointment, buying lots of new clothes and so on.
[SPEAKER_00]: I asked her jokingly if she was going out of town or something.
[SPEAKER_00]: She said no, she was just really happy.
[SPEAKER_00]: I supported that, though dressing up and buying new clothes wasn't typical for her, I understood it was for her mental health.
[SPEAKER_00]: I told her, when you look good, you feel good.
[SPEAKER_00]: The next Monday morning, I went to work as usual.
[SPEAKER_00]: We normally text all mornings since she worked from ten to six, and I worked six to two.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was sending texts, but they weren't going through.
[SPEAKER_00]: No big deal.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then around noon, she texted me like everything was normal.
[SPEAKER_00]: The day went on, but communication was sparse by seven in the evening, she still wasn't home.
[SPEAKER_00]: That was weird.
[SPEAKER_00]: Her workplace was ten minutes away, and she was usually home within fifteen to twenty minutes.
[SPEAKER_00]: I kept texting with no reply, so I called her.
[SPEAKER_00]: She answered angrily saying, hello?
[SPEAKER_00]: I asked where she was, and if she was okay, she said, oh, I forgot to tell you, I am in Vegas.
[SPEAKER_00]: don't wait up for me tonight.
[SPEAKER_00]: When she got back the next week, I broke up with her and kicked her out.
[SPEAKER_00]: That situation triggered something in me.
[SPEAKER_00]: Even though I forgave her, I could never trust her again.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story Twelve.
[SPEAKER_00]: He let other women use my crap when I was gone.
[SPEAKER_00]: I ran into a girl I had suspected he was cheating on me with and she was wearing my shirt and shoes.
[SPEAKER_00]: I immediately drove to his house to get my things.
[SPEAKER_00]: When he saw me, he freaked out, told me to be quiet and asked, what are you doing here?
[SPEAKER_00]: I went to the bedroom and bathroom to grab my stuff, and there was a different woman in the shower.
[SPEAKER_00]: My makeup and straitner had been used.
[SPEAKER_00]: To this day, I still don't have a bottom retainer for my teeth.
[SPEAKER_00]: The last place I used it was at is house.
[SPEAKER_00]: I swear someone took it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I am not even kidding.
[SPEAKER_00]: He used to refer to me as his future ex-wife.
[SPEAKER_00]: But the final mail in the coffin was when he threw me across the room by my hair because I wouldn't grind and be physical with an exotic dancer at a club we went to.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story thirteen We had been seeing each other for about a year and a half when she asked me to buy her a doll off-vented because the seller had blocked her.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said no.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't want to go around someone's decision not to sell to her.
[SPEAKER_00]: For three days I got non-stop messages.
[SPEAKER_00]: By me this doll, please buy me this doll.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you loved me, you sipped by this doll.
[SPEAKER_00]: On the fourth day, while I was at work, she sent me a flood of abuse, calling me every name under the sun because the doll had sold.
[SPEAKER_00]: You just said, not doing this anymore.
[SPEAKER_00]: I am breaking up with you.
[SPEAKER_00]: The abuse turned into days of begging and pleading before I was finally able to get my stuff and cut off all contact.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then she drank acetone.
[SPEAKER_00]: But that's another story.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story fourteen.
[SPEAKER_00]: My last relationship was the one that made me want to have children.
[SPEAKER_00]: We even got engaged in all.
[SPEAKER_00]: We were the same age.
[SPEAKER_00]: I had a normal job and he was a business guy, very smart and clever.
[SPEAKER_00]: One day we talked about the possibility of having kids in a new home he might buy.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said that if we ever grew apart he would still be the father of my kids and we would both be present for them no matter what.
[SPEAKER_00]: For context, my biological father was never present.
[SPEAKER_00]: He left my mom at the hospital, and we almost lost her.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not having him in my life made me certain that my soon to be husband would be there for our children, even if we broke up.
[SPEAKER_00]: He replied, you won't be able to provide anything since I will be buying the house and everything else, so I sit cut you off and take the kids.
[SPEAKER_00]: That was it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I've never told anyone this before.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story fifteen.
[SPEAKER_00]: He started isolating me from my family, who I am very close to, no one should ever come between me and them.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was young and didn't realize how controlling, paranoid and possessive his behavior was.
[SPEAKER_00]: But when I found out he had blocked my moms and brothers' numbers, telling them I didn't want to see them and they weren't welcome at our place.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was like a light switch flipped in my head, a blaring siren screaming.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is not love!
[SPEAKER_00]: Get out now!
[SPEAKER_00]: It felt almost physical, like the love drained out of me instantly.
[SPEAKER_00]: When I looked at him then, I saw him so clearly from a detached place, and all I felt was disgust and pity.
[SPEAKER_00]: She thought it was funny to insult Muslim and Arab people for no reason.
[SPEAKER_00]: A Texan woman living with me and Paris, showing no respect for the country and never taking responsibility when she messed up or did reckless things that could have put us both in danger.
[SPEAKER_00]: Her moods changed so quickly it was terrifying, going from loving and happy with the cutest smile to sobbing in my arms in public for half an hour, then suddenly happy again than hateful and verbally abusive for no reason, even toward me.
[SPEAKER_00]: She acted like a twelve-year-old, despite being thirty.
[SPEAKER_00]: The amount of patience I needed was immense, and I am proud I lasted as long as I did without losing control.
[SPEAKER_00]: She has bipolar disorder and is an alcoholic.
[SPEAKER_00]: I just needed to get this off my chest to feel better.
[SPEAKER_00]: I prefer to remember the wonderful moments I gave her in France.
[SPEAKER_00]: She's back in Texas now where she can be as racist as she wants.
[SPEAKER_00]: But the good times were full of happiness.
[SPEAKER_00]: We almost got married.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story Seventeen.
[SPEAKER_00]: He tried to rent out rooms in our house, which we owned, without my consent.
[SPEAKER_00]: I told him no, the first time he brought it up, but he did it anyway.
[SPEAKER_00]: One morning, I woke up to go to work.
[SPEAKER_00]: He had already left, and my car was blocked in by another vehicle.
[SPEAKER_00]: I called him, and he said he'd rented a room, and that car belonged to the guest.
[SPEAKER_00]: He claimed he specifically told the guest not to block me in, as if that made it any better.
[SPEAKER_00]: And knocked on the guest door and half-unclosed man and boxers came out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yawning.
[SPEAKER_00]: I politely asked him to move the car and he did.
[SPEAKER_00]: All I could think was how my husband had left me alone in our home with a strange man.
[SPEAKER_00]: I called off work to take a personal day and started packing.
[SPEAKER_00]: I stayed with a friend until I could send him divorce papers and finalize the divorce many months later.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story eighteen.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was our first anniversary, so we went to the zoo for the day.
[SPEAKER_00]: When we reached the gorilla and chimpanzee exhibit, I started talking about how fascinating evolution was.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was in year eleven biology and we'd been studying Charles Darwin and evolution.
[SPEAKER_00]: He looked me dead in the eye and said, it's a conspiracy theory.
[SPEAKER_00]: I just froze.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was seventeen and hadn't learned conflict resolution yet.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story-nineteen.
[SPEAKER_00]: I got a job at an oil plant that was fly in fly out, so I stayed in camp and was gone for a week at a time.
[SPEAKER_00]: There was barely any cell service at the plant, especially outside the control room, and since I worked in the field, I couldn't text him back during the day.
[SPEAKER_00]: Every night when I got back to camp, and my phone finally connected to the tower, it would light up with about one hundred texts, and missed calls from him, and this was only my first week on the job.
[SPEAKER_00]: When I flew home, he picked me up from the airport and spent the entire drive accusing me of cheating, saying I probably hooked up with every guy in camp.
[SPEAKER_00]: He told me he'd watched everyone get off the plane and noticed I was the only woman, so I must have had a group encounter too.
[SPEAKER_00]: I just sat there quietly.
[SPEAKER_00]: When he dropped me off at my house, I didn't even say goodbye.
[SPEAKER_00]: I went inside, locked the doors, and blocked his number.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story twenty.
[SPEAKER_00]: She found the keys I had hidden while she was very drunk.
[SPEAKER_00]: I told her I wouldn't let her drive in that state, and that I'd sleep on the couch if needed.
[SPEAKER_00]: We'd been living together for over a year by then.
[SPEAKER_00]: She got into the car parked in our garage and I stood behind it, pleading with her not to leave.
[SPEAKER_00]: She threw it in reverse and would have run me over if I hadn't jumped onto the trunk and then rolled out of the way.
[SPEAKER_00]: That was it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't need that in my life.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story twenty one.
[SPEAKER_00]: Our marriage counselor told me he had stopped engaging in therapy and was refusing to do anything that wasn't for himself.
[SPEAKER_00]: She suggested I take a break and think about what I truly wanted out of the marriage and whether what he was offering was enough because he made it clear that was all I'd get.
[SPEAKER_00]: I came home and told him I wanted to take a break for a few days and would be staying with a friend.
[SPEAKER_00]: He called me a selfish jerk through our sand unity glass at me from across the room, blocked the door when I tried to leave, grabbed me by the arms and threw me onto the bed.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then he said he was stepping out for a minute and that I'd better be gone by the time he got back.
[SPEAKER_00]: I packed what I could and never looked back.
[SPEAKER_00]: Fifteen minutes later, he texted me saying, the first time I've ever listened to him, and maybe we could make this marriage work after all if you come back.
[SPEAKER_00]: I never deleted that text.
[SPEAKER_00]: Every time I thought I might still need him, I read it and reminded myself, complete narcissist.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story-twenty-two.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was seven AM on New Year's Eve.
[SPEAKER_00]: We were at the airport about to fly out for a party.
[SPEAKER_00]: He was still drunk from the night before, stomping behind me like a big baby yelling, you know I hate morning flights.
[SPEAKER_00]: Why the hell would you book such an early flight?
[SPEAKER_00]: The breaking point came when he hissed.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're so foolish.
[SPEAKER_00]: I stopped and turned to look at him.
[SPEAKER_00]: My inner voice asked, what the hell are you doing with this mess of a dude?
[SPEAKER_00]: I walked out of the airport and left him there.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story twenty-three.
[SPEAKER_00]: I directly discovered that she was cheating on me.
[SPEAKER_00]: I took some pictures, sent them to her, then threw out her stuff and blocked her number.
[SPEAKER_00]: When she showed up at my place, I didn't answer the door.
[SPEAKER_00]: Despite dating for more than a year, I completely ghosted her after that.
[SPEAKER_00]: story twenty four.
[SPEAKER_00]: He had a dating app on his phone six days after our one year anniversary and thirteen months after we deleted our dating apps.
[SPEAKER_00]: It wasn't just on his phone.
[SPEAKER_00]: He sent me a screenshot and it was his last used app as if he were switching between using a dating app and texting me.
[SPEAKER_00]: I asked him why he had it on his phone and he said, I don't know why that's there.
[SPEAKER_00]: My bad haha.
[SPEAKER_00]: He knew why.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I knew why.
[SPEAKER_00]: So, I dumped him.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story twenty-five.
[SPEAKER_00]: The eight-month relationship left me alone at a party full of her friends.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't know a soul there.
[SPEAKER_00]: After a few small talks in an hour of wandering, I finally left unable to find her.
[SPEAKER_00]: A few hours later, she called me drunk, saying she was getting a ride to come over, but she never showed up.
[SPEAKER_00]: The next day, someone I briefly talked to at the party told me she was trying to hook up with at least two different guys there.
[SPEAKER_00]: So, I ghosted her.
[SPEAKER_00]: She tried to get back with me for weeks, and then, a year later, left a sobbing voicemail begging to come back.
[SPEAKER_00]: I never answered, that was it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I learned a lot from that one.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story twenty six.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not married, thankfully.
[SPEAKER_00]: We refinanced our house to pay off credit card debt.
[SPEAKER_00]: Six months later, I got on the computer and noticed she hadn't closed her windows.
[SPEAKER_00]: I saw she was back up to twenty thousand in credit card debt.
[SPEAKER_00]: I packed my stuff the next day and gave her the choice.
[SPEAKER_00]: Keep the house in her name or move out.
[SPEAKER_00]: I kept the house she chose to stay.
[SPEAKER_00]: One year later was forced to sell it to pay off her debts.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story twenty-seven.
[SPEAKER_00]: He was extremely attractive, charismatic, and charming, but also an extremely narcissistic, manipulative, es-addict.
[SPEAKER_00]: If I didn't give it up at least twice a day, he'd tell me what a terrible girlfriend I was, and that there was no point being with me since I clearly didn't care about him or his needs.
[SPEAKER_00]: Every time I tried to leave, he guilt tripped me back.
[SPEAKER_00]: On our six-month anniversary, he told me I wasn't putting enough effort into my BJ.
[SPEAKER_00]: I stood up, said, I am done and left.
[SPEAKER_00]: Screw you, Tony.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story twenty-eight.
[SPEAKER_00]: My toddler was crying because he wanted his mom, me and not his dad, my ex-husband.
[SPEAKER_00]: In the middle of a fight, my ex started spanking the hell out of my toddler for that reason.
[SPEAKER_00]: He had been abusive to me before, but that was the last damn straw.
[SPEAKER_00]: You don't touch my child.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was at the police station the next morning.
[SPEAKER_00]: All this to say, I know how damaging it is for kids to hear their parents' fight.
[SPEAKER_00]: The psychological effects are so, so harmful.
[SPEAKER_00]: I regret not leaving sooner, but at least I left, and now my kids and I are safe and happy.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story twenty-nine.
[SPEAKER_00]: We had been having problems in our marriage, but one day I took a nap and missed a phone call from him.
[SPEAKER_00]: He went to the bank and emptied our joint account because he was scared, I was leaving him.
[SPEAKER_00]: Turns out, messing with my money and giving me yet another reason not to trust him was the proverbial straw and it was over.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story thirty.
[SPEAKER_00]: He had the audacity to tell me he was jealous that someone got to bang me when I was skinnier.
[SPEAKER_00]: You didn't even brush your teeth every day.
[SPEAKER_00]: You get a small rash and call yourself a monster in hideous.
[SPEAKER_00]: You were inconsolable for days after losing a softball game that didn't even have a Starbucks gift card on the line.
[SPEAKER_00]: I told him.
[SPEAKER_00]: You don't deserve the air I breathe, and broke up with him.
[SPEAKER_00]: Guess what?
[SPEAKER_00]: Travis?
[SPEAKER_00]: I've lost forty-five pounds.
[SPEAKER_00]: You baby backwimp.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story thirty-one.
[SPEAKER_00]: She sucker punched me in the head after I told her she couldn't tell me who I could be friends with.
[SPEAKER_00]: The next morning, she tried to manipulate me by pretending she'd been in a car accident and was in the hospital.
[SPEAKER_00]: Edit.
[SPEAKER_00]: I forgot to add the following evening.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was going out for drinks with coworkers to celebrate a promotion.
[SPEAKER_00]: She showed up with a few friends, all dressed like they were at a bachelorette party trying to crash it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Luckily, she got there before we did.
[SPEAKER_00]: I walked in, saw her, turned right back around, and texted everyone a new location.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story thirty-two.
[SPEAKER_00]: During an argument, he got about an inch from my face, trying to provoke me, and wouldn't let me leave the house.
[SPEAKER_00]: He was clearly trying to get me to hit him so he could claim I was abusive and get custody of the kids.
[SPEAKER_00]: If anything happened, then he made a comment that implied, because I was his wife, it was his legal right to assault me, and that no one would believe me if it did happen.
[SPEAKER_00]: I've never done a one eighty so fast in my life.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't know I could actually hate someone that much.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story thirty three.
[SPEAKER_00]: In nineteen seventy three, he bribed our five-year-old daughter to speak into a borrowed real-to-real tape recorder and talk about all the beatings her mommy gave her.
[SPEAKER_00]: Being five, she told me all about the role-playing and how she was just saying lines for the play.
[SPEAKER_00]: I confronted him, and he screamed at our daughter, saying he couldn't trust her.
[SPEAKER_00]: He was planning a divorce, in which his fantasy involved sending me away with nothing while his girlfriend moved in to take care of our five-year-old and our one-year-old baby.
[SPEAKER_00]: He planned to keep everything, including the house.
[SPEAKER_00]: He left, though, because being the narcissistic coward he was, he didn't want to get shot in the back with a thirty-thirty rifle.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story thirty-four.
[SPEAKER_00]: He took the vital energy of our relationship and poured it into creeping on random people online, maintaining multiple online relationships, all while swearing up and down that he was trying in the marriage.
[SPEAKER_00]: I found intimate messages on his public profile, pet names and all, and it shattered my heart.
[SPEAKER_00]: It all started while I was struggling to get pregnant and going to doctors already feeling worthless.
[SPEAKER_00]: That makes it feel like a stabbing pain to my very existence.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story thirty-five.
[SPEAKER_00]: He told me he was single, then later said he was separated from his ex-wife.
[SPEAKER_00]: Turns out he wasn't.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was stupidly obsessed with him, so I gave him some time to fix his situation.
[SPEAKER_00]: After weeks he said she was out of the picture.
[SPEAKER_00]: Obviously, she wasn't.
[SPEAKER_00]: One night, I was about to make us dinner when she started calling and texting him.
[SPEAKER_00]: I asked what she wanted.
[SPEAKER_00]: And he said, I don't know, but don't worry.
[SPEAKER_00]: I will tell her I am going to bed so she leaves us alone.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then he went to take a shower.
[SPEAKER_00]: While he was in there, I called myself an Uber, left, and never saw him again.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, and I called the so-called ex-wife to let her know.
[SPEAKER_00]: Surprise, she didn't know about me either.
[SPEAKER_00]: So yeah, not sure how we fixed that.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story thirty-six.
[SPEAKER_00]: I suspected my ex-husband married for seventeen years, together for twenty of cheating, so I hired a private investigator.
[SPEAKER_00]: Eight days later, I filed for divorce with proof.
[SPEAKER_00]: When the husband of his affair partner found out, he often self in their living room, and their sixteen-year-old son was the one who found him.
[SPEAKER_00]: My ex came running back wanting to reconcile, but I was done.
[SPEAKER_00]: It turned out my ex had been married before and had cheated with the same woman while she was married to a different man.
[SPEAKER_00]: They were supposedly toxic together on and off a lot but couldn't stay away.
[SPEAKER_00]: I've heard they're still together.
[SPEAKER_00]: Hopefully they will stop ruining other people's lives.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story thirty seven.
[SPEAKER_00]: A relationship was already pretty bad, but one night it hit a new low.
[SPEAKER_00]: He wouldn't let me take a shower by myself with my phone to listen to music, saying, what do you need a phone in the shower for?
[SPEAKER_00]: He even tried to sit there and watch while a shower to make sure I didn't use it.
[SPEAKER_00]: We always had terrible fights, but this was just ridiculous.
[SPEAKER_00]: I calmly broke up with him.
[SPEAKER_00]: We lived together in everything, but that was the final straw, though honestly, he had done much worse during our relationship.
[SPEAKER_00]: I later found out he had been cheating on me the whole time, too.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story thirty-eight.
[SPEAKER_00]: Just minutes after my mom passed, he grabbed me by the shoulders and told me to stop crying.
[SPEAKER_00]: In that moment, I didn't realize it, but that's when I stopped loving him.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was overwhelmed by too much grief and pain.
[SPEAKER_00]: Months ago, he kept telling me he just wanted his normal girlfriend back.
[SPEAKER_00]: Whenever I woke up crying in the middle of the night, he told me to stop because I kept waking him.
[SPEAKER_00]: I had to quietly go into another room or downstairs to cry out of fear he'd wake up mad at me.
[SPEAKER_00]: My first Christmas without my mom, I spent the week at my dad's with him and my little sister.
[SPEAKER_00]: The day before Christmas Eve, I asked him to come down to my dad's to stay with me for Christmas.
[SPEAKER_00]: He refused, complaining about having to pack this in that, though it wasn't much.
[SPEAKER_00]: Meanwhile, I had my little sister and our dog with me.
[SPEAKER_00]: He wanted me to pack up all my things and be at our home with him, instead of just packing one bag and driving twenty minutes to be there with me and my family for Christmas.
[SPEAKER_00]: A few more months passed, about eight or nine after my mom's passing and he pretended like nothing had happened.
[SPEAKER_00]: But he never let me see that my family didn't want me spending time with the friends who had supported me during those months.
[SPEAKER_00]: About a year after my mom died, I finally had enough.
[SPEAKER_00]: I realized he was never the kind of support I needed, especially through life-changing moments like losing a parent.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story-thirty-nine.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not my story, but my partners.
[SPEAKER_00]: A few years ago, he and his ex-wife custom built a nice suburban home after being married for a few years.
[SPEAKER_00]: In the final year of their marriage, unbeknownst to them at the time, while the house was being finished, my boyfriend found out she had been cheating on him for six solid months with his coworker.
[SPEAKER_00]: The kicker is, she married that coworker, and now lives just a few blocks away from us.
[SPEAKER_00]: She got a new job delivering mail for the post office, delivering my mail to the house she built, lived in for four months, and was basically kicked out of.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story forty.
[SPEAKER_00]: He was unemployed at Christmas, so I bought gifts for his family.
[SPEAKER_00]: The entire time it is family gathering, he was texting random people and girls.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was the only one actually engaging with them.
[SPEAKER_00]: Christmas also happens to be my birthday, and I had kept a boxed cake in the cupboard for months.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not once did he consider making the cake for me at no cost to him.
[SPEAKER_00]: I had everything ready or even hand-right a card.
[SPEAKER_00]: After we got home from his parents' place, I told him to pack his things and get out.
[SPEAKER_00]: I called his mom and said, oh, I am so sorry.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's going to have to come back.
[SPEAKER_00]: He forgot his manners.
[SPEAKER_00]: He had nowhere else to live.
[SPEAKER_00]: She apologized to me and wasn't surprised at all.
[SPEAKER_00]: good riddance.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't ever let society allow you to be mistreated.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story forty-one.
[SPEAKER_00]: This was about fifteen years ago, but he punched a hole in the wall right near my head.
[SPEAKER_00]: He had never shown any signs of physical violence before, and I am not even sure if I was really scared of him.
[SPEAKER_00]: We were probably going to be evenly matched and both terrible at fighting.
[SPEAKER_00]: But apparently, that was the line.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't hesitate for a second.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was over.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story forty-two.
[SPEAKER_00]: After supporting my girlfriend through her mental health struggles, I reached a point where I was struggling and asked her for help and support.
[SPEAKER_00]: We sat down and talked through the details.
[SPEAKER_00]: Two weeks later, I shared that I was making progress and had a good day.
[SPEAKER_00]: She looked at me, paused to think about her words, and then repeated the very thing I'd shared earlier that had triggered me into a state of self-wallowing.
[SPEAKER_00]: There was no doubt it was completely intentional.
[SPEAKER_00]: I broke up with her the next day and realized just how self-centered she really was.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story forty-three.
[SPEAKER_00]: He made up a fake fight, pushed my buttons, and twisted the story to make himself look like the victim in marriage counseling.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then, he disappeared.
[SPEAKER_00]: Abandoning me and my two kids on Mother's Day weekend to go to his hometown.
[SPEAKER_00]: When he hung out with another woman, his story changed even more.
[SPEAKER_00]: He came home, lied about everything, berated me non-stop, and then bought a puppy right after that.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story forty-four.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'd been dating this girl for a couple of months, and one night we went on a double date with my friend and his partner.
[SPEAKER_00]: They'd never met before and things were going okay.
[SPEAKER_00]: She talked about having cervical cancer, which was very sad, but then as we were looking for a taxi, she started doing a strange dance around everyone circling us and chanting that she used to have cancer.
[SPEAKER_00]: It went on and on.
[SPEAKER_00]: We all smiled politely and true what the heck style I jumped in my cab and never called her again.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story forty five.
[SPEAKER_00]: After an excruciating complication from knee surgery left me unable to walk without a walker, we were driving to a restaurant for dinner.
[SPEAKER_00]: He stopped by the front door, looked at me, then drove to the back of the parking lot, leaving me alone in the car with my walker in the trunk, never looking back.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's when I realized he would never help me if I needed it.
[SPEAKER_00]: His focus was always on himself.
[SPEAKER_00]: It took a few more incidents like that over the next couple of weeks before I finally filed for divorce.
[SPEAKER_00]: story forty six.
[SPEAKER_00]: I spent the day cleaning the house and was almost done when I decided to take a nap on the couch because I was exhausted.
[SPEAKER_00]: I partly woke up to her yelling that I lied about cleaning everything that she could nap anytime she wanted, but I needed permission.
[SPEAKER_00]: As I drifted back to sleep, she kicked me in the face and broke my nose.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was done, story forty-seven.
[SPEAKER_00]: She apparently made accounts on websites I visited just to cyberstock and spy on me.
[SPEAKER_00]: Her trust issues were always a problem in our relationship, but this crossed the line.
[SPEAKER_00]: I had to finally cut it off.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would have never known if a moderator hadn't messaged me to say there was a zero post-account, exclusively reading through my profile.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story forty-eight.
[SPEAKER_00]: He texted me saying maybe things would be better if we had some time apart.
[SPEAKER_00]: I packed all my stuff and left our house in the two-hour window between finishing work and him arriving home.
[SPEAKER_00]: The frantic texts and calls started as soon as he realized I was gone.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was a horrible relationship.
[SPEAKER_00]: He didn't believe I'd actually leave.
[SPEAKER_00]: That night, I slept well and didn't have to cry myself to sleep lying next to him.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think I'd been waiting months for a sign or permission to leave.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story forty-nine.
[SPEAKER_00]: The breaking point came when I found her with a stranger from the internet, in his car, in a church parking lot, in the middle of the afternoon during COVID.
[SPEAKER_00]: I took her keys and never let her back in the house.
[SPEAKER_00]: Later, I discovered she had committed a self-adventing crime against a woman, stolen money from the family, carried on numerous online affairs, and had been lying about nearly everything to me and our family for years.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story Fifty.
[SPEAKER_00]: I met a woman online.
[SPEAKER_00]: We chatted for a few weeks before meeting and had two or three pleasant dates.
[SPEAKER_00]: We still kept in touch.
[SPEAKER_00]: One night, I went to see a close friend.
[SPEAKER_00]: Also a woman.
[SPEAKER_00]: We'd known each other for over five years.
[SPEAKER_00]: Nothing romantic, just friends.
[SPEAKER_00]: I told my girlfriend I'd be visiting for a few hours, and she said okay.
[SPEAKER_00]: Less than an hour later, she kept calling and texting to ask where I was.
[SPEAKER_00]: Finally, I called her and confirmed I was at my friend's place, just as I said.
[SPEAKER_00]: She responded, I knew you were with that was.
[SPEAKER_00]: I told her, this isn't working.
[SPEAKER_00]: My friendship is more valuable than yours.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then I went back inside and enjoyed a pleasant evening shooting pool on her new table.
[SPEAKER_00]: No thanks.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story fifty-one.
[SPEAKER_00]: She moved a recently released from prison profile PDF file into our home and borrowed a gun from a family friend of hers to threaten me with when I got home from work.
[SPEAKER_00]: The only reason I am alive is that she bragged to one of our common friends about what she was about to do and that friend called me when I was driving home from work.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story fifty-two.
[SPEAKER_00]: He refused to let me leave during an argument.
[SPEAKER_00]: Things were already rough, but that was the moment I knew we were done.
[SPEAKER_00]: I told him he could try to stop me for the next several hours, but I was on duty, we were both military, and the M.Ps would come looking for me if I wasn't there.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was not about to cover for him.
[SPEAKER_00]: He finally stepped aside.
[SPEAKER_00]: I went outside and called my command.
[SPEAKER_00]: Within a month, he was transferred to another base after becoming a problem in the eyes of the base judge Advocate General.
[SPEAKER_00]: Story fifty-three.
[SPEAKER_00]: He made fun of me for being too uptight about money in front of a group of my friends, while he was living with me rent free, relying on me to pay all the bills, and leaving me with a dirty house.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was only twenty-four, and I literally turned into the girl from the exorcist for a moment, and growled.
[SPEAKER_00]: Get the hell out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then I went home and threw his stuff out on the lawn.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was so satisfying, a plus, best decision I ever made.
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you for watching.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you enjoyed this video, be sure to give it a thumbs up, subscribe, and hit the bell icon so you never miss an update.