WEBVTT 00:06.251 --> 00:07.351 [SPEAKER_00]: Hello, hello, everybody. 00:07.371 --> 00:10.233 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm Lexi Lombardier, host of the Alexey podcast. 00:10.333 --> 00:12.114 [SPEAKER_00]: Now known as the Lexey podcast. 00:12.154 --> 00:13.335 [SPEAKER_00]: We've dropped the enzyme. 00:13.495 --> 00:28.325 [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm here to give a little heart to heart be a bit more honest on the disappointment I'm feeling with myself and admit that so hopefully I can work through it in real time and maybe 00:28.765 --> 00:29.625 [SPEAKER_00]: This could help you. 00:29.645 --> 00:30.686 [SPEAKER_00]: I have no idea. 00:31.026 --> 00:37.829 [SPEAKER_00]: I just feel really proud of myself, but I'm not seeing the fruits of my labor and it's getting me down. 00:38.129 --> 00:40.731 [SPEAKER_00]: It's not getting me down too much, but a little bit. 00:40.851 --> 00:45.473 [SPEAKER_00]: For instance, I have been making videos editing videos. 00:45.893 --> 01:00.290 [SPEAKER_00]: Creating podcasts, posting photos, and I don't know, sharing my life on the internet for almost fifteen years, which is maybe more than fifteen years, honestly, because I think I began when I was thirteen, and I'm twenty nine now. 01:00.630 --> 01:02.673 [SPEAKER_00]: No, I think I was twelve, so you have fifteen years. 01:03.013 --> 01:15.000 [SPEAKER_00]: I digress and lately I've really gotten back into YouTube and I have been creating vlogs as well as some commentary videos and there are some of my favorite videos that I've ever made. 01:15.281 --> 01:17.762 [SPEAKER_00]: For example, the video that I posted yesterday. 01:17.782 --> 01:20.464 [SPEAKER_00]: It was such a fun video to edit. 01:20.704 --> 01:25.187 [SPEAKER_00]: It was something that I'm proud of and it just isn't being received. 01:25.447 --> 01:32.171 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm looking on my YouTube channel right now and in the last four months I've been pretty regular on YouTube and 01:32.731 --> 01:33.752 [SPEAKER_00]: I love my videos. 01:33.972 --> 01:39.876 [SPEAKER_00]: They're exactly the type of video that I want to watch and I'm making what I want to see. 01:40.276 --> 01:50.083 [SPEAKER_00]: That being said, maybe I don't want to see the same things that everyone else does and that's one aspect for why they're not quote unquote performing well. 01:50.523 --> 01:52.485 [SPEAKER_00]: but then maybe there's tweaks I could make. 01:52.945 --> 02:04.176 [SPEAKER_00]: I started about four months ago with some fairly simple thumbnails and that is because I wanted a simple thumbnail to express how casual and comforting the video would feel. 02:04.196 --> 02:11.963 [SPEAKER_00]: And then I went to Australia and things were more fun so I started spicing up the thumbnails a little bit more and at the typeface that I found so I continued it. 02:12.363 --> 02:15.646 [SPEAKER_00]: Then after I got back from Australia I didn't necessarily feel like 02:15.966 --> 02:21.148 [SPEAKER_00]: sharing my life because it felt a little bit lackluster after having such a fun adventure. 02:21.528 --> 02:26.350 [SPEAKER_00]: But I did feel like getting my life together did a massive amount of deep cleaning. 02:26.771 --> 02:34.094 [SPEAKER_00]: And as a very sentimental person, that has been working on detaching themselves from material items. 02:34.114 --> 02:38.295 [SPEAKER_00]: I found myself feeling the most free to get rid of things that I ever have. 02:38.555 --> 02:42.257 [SPEAKER_00]: And I thought as someone who has a really hard time getting rid of things, 02:42.717 --> 02:51.023 [SPEAKER_00]: Watching the journey that I've taken from asking like fourteen-year-old XE to go through her closet versus twenty-nine-year-old XE, I'm a totally different person. 02:51.063 --> 02:56.487 [SPEAKER_00]: Like the experience has been night and day, so I thought I'd make a decluttering tips video for sentimental people. 02:57.079 --> 03:06.166 [SPEAKER_00]: And then everywhere I looked for some reason because I saw that my videos weren't performing, the economy in the United States of America is in a shaky place right now. 03:06.266 --> 03:15.493 [SPEAKER_00]: So of course I'm looking for alternative ways to make income and find other jobs to apply for, which I will get to the new job that I have in a bit. 03:15.573 --> 03:16.874 [SPEAKER_00]: You're gonna be so surprised. 03:16.934 --> 03:18.815 [SPEAKER_00]: You're like, what an interesting turn. 03:19.376 --> 03:22.258 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm just throwing them at the wall and seeing what sticks. 03:22.698 --> 03:39.703 [SPEAKER_00]: But AI was constantly coming up, whether it was to use charge VT as an admin, whether to use it for creating content, which even just the term creating content now has a little bit of an irritating connotation in my head because it just feels so separate from art. 03:40.523 --> 03:42.424 [SPEAKER_00]: And I saw a really good TikTok on this. 03:42.444 --> 03:46.307 [SPEAKER_00]: Someone giving commentary about making content is not inherently creative. 03:46.347 --> 03:49.549 [SPEAKER_00]: I think we've lost the plot of what creativity is. 03:49.749 --> 03:51.470 [SPEAKER_00]: And there's an argument for both sides. 03:51.970 --> 03:53.792 [SPEAKER_00]: One, hypothetically, everything is creative. 03:53.832 --> 03:55.813 [SPEAKER_00]: We are all creative engineers are creative. 03:56.273 --> 03:57.374 [SPEAKER_00]: Teachers are creative. 03:57.774 --> 03:58.835 [SPEAKER_00]: Music is a creative. 03:58.875 --> 04:00.136 [SPEAKER_00]: You can make an argument for that. 04:00.236 --> 04:08.501 [SPEAKER_00]: But she was making the point of you coming on your phone from your bed and sharing some wild thought is not you being creative. 04:08.801 --> 04:29.531 [SPEAKER_00]: That's just you talking and there was an interesting aspect of that of what is creating content and is that artistic work, no, not necessarily, but the point was AI, charging BT, all of that was becoming really prevalent in what I was watching and advice I was getting, how to use it and it felt not against my moral compass necessarily, but slightly. 04:30.091 --> 04:31.652 [SPEAKER_00]: So I created a commentary video on that. 04:31.712 --> 04:34.752 [SPEAKER_00]: And then the last few weeks in LA have just been a lot of fun. 04:34.773 --> 04:36.553 [SPEAKER_00]: I've really been enjoying summer. 04:36.573 --> 04:37.593 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm a summer girl. 04:37.613 --> 04:39.214 [SPEAKER_00]: I like the heat. 04:39.394 --> 04:40.434 [SPEAKER_00]: I like the beach. 04:40.654 --> 04:42.175 [SPEAKER_00]: I like the sun. 04:42.195 --> 04:45.296 [SPEAKER_00]: I love spring, but I love summer. 04:45.316 --> 04:46.356 [SPEAKER_00]: I love them both. 04:46.576 --> 04:48.437 [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know why I'd say I like spring. 04:48.897 --> 04:51.158 [SPEAKER_00]: But I've made three different sort of beachy vlogs. 04:51.298 --> 04:52.438 [SPEAKER_00]: And I love them. 04:52.718 --> 04:55.099 [SPEAKER_00]: But they are just simply not 04:55.399 --> 05:15.315 [SPEAKER_00]: performing and my internal conflict is for me to have something quote unquote perform better it feels as if I need to perform and I am not a performer I gladly document and I gladly share and I'm a happy speaker and I'm glad to write 05:15.795 --> 05:30.126 [SPEAKER_00]: but I would not consider myself a performer and there are aspects of resistance that I have to creating more popular content or content that would hypothetically perform better because it doesn't feel natural to me and there has been this 05:32.127 --> 05:39.256 [SPEAKER_00]: pointed finger that older generations have had on people that have a career based on social media or the internet. 05:39.336 --> 05:46.865 [SPEAKER_00]: It could be taken away in a second and I think their point was that these sites Instagram YouTube, they could all go down and 05:47.225 --> 06:11.911 [SPEAKER_00]: It's so not like that what the issue has been as someone who has been doing this for a decade and a half is once brands got their hand in this it felt okay I have a pretty regular income I'm posting videos and there's mostly always a sponsor I'm thinking back to twenty twenty twenty twenty one honestly the pandemic was great for internet content creators because that's where everyone was 06:12.151 --> 06:12.571 [SPEAKER_00]: watching. 06:12.611 --> 06:16.614 [SPEAKER_00]: And even last summer, there were a lot of brands that wanted promotion from me. 06:16.915 --> 06:17.755 [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm glad to do that. 06:17.775 --> 06:19.336 [SPEAKER_00]: Thank you for supporting my channel. 06:19.376 --> 06:21.298 [SPEAKER_00]: Thank you for supporting my podcast. 06:21.558 --> 06:22.759 [SPEAKER_00]: And it's been a little slower. 06:22.779 --> 06:30.445 [SPEAKER_00]: And I don't know whether or not that's a side effect of the industry, a side effect of the economy, a side effect of my personal content creation. 06:30.485 --> 06:33.507 [SPEAKER_00]: But then there's been such a rise in micro influencers. 06:33.727 --> 06:37.090 [SPEAKER_00]: And a lot of QVC-esque content 06:37.430 --> 06:39.311 [SPEAKER_00]: Which is against my nature. 06:39.331 --> 06:44.732 [SPEAKER_00]: I don't necessarily want to constantly be selling things. 06:44.812 --> 06:45.553 [SPEAKER_00]: Don't get me wrong. 06:45.653 --> 06:46.693 [SPEAKER_00]: I like products. 06:47.073 --> 06:48.794 [SPEAKER_00]: I have favorite beauty products. 06:48.814 --> 06:50.454 [SPEAKER_00]: I have favorite clothing pieces. 06:50.474 --> 06:52.415 [SPEAKER_00]: I have things that I like for spoon. 06:52.895 --> 07:03.997 [SPEAKER_00]: And I would gladly talk about them, but with the state of the world right now, it feels a little vain and a little vapid to come on here and say, you guys should buy this. 07:05.018 --> 07:06.498 [SPEAKER_00]: This is my internal conflict. 07:06.978 --> 07:14.260 [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know why I'm having a lot of resistance towards talking about items right now, which is so strange because I'm still shopping. 07:14.280 --> 07:16.280 [SPEAKER_00]: I haven't even talked about my coloring book yet. 07:16.720 --> 07:18.221 [SPEAKER_00]: I probably sound so stupid. 07:18.241 --> 07:24.006 [SPEAKER_00]: You're probably like this girl is so dumb and whining and I hope that it's not being misinterpreted. 07:24.126 --> 07:34.774 [SPEAKER_00]: But I find frustration because there's so much freedom and flexibility and opportunity in this remote lifestyle of sharing your life or sharing whatever you want to teach. 07:35.034 --> 07:37.596 [SPEAKER_00]: But at the same time, I'm feeling the pressure 07:38.016 --> 07:43.361 [SPEAKER_00]: to sell things in order to maintain a livelihood and with the state of the world. 07:43.502 --> 07:45.483 [SPEAKER_00]: I don't feel like selling new things. 07:45.564 --> 07:47.045 [SPEAKER_00]: I feel like making you calm. 07:47.085 --> 07:48.106 [SPEAKER_00]: I want to give you hope. 07:48.186 --> 07:53.872 [SPEAKER_00]: I want to give you relief and I don't want to contribute to distractions even if they're not. 07:54.352 --> 07:56.133 [SPEAKER_00]: purposefully distractions. 07:56.353 --> 08:02.498 [SPEAKER_00]: Now, I'm a complete hypocrite because I'm simultaneously giving all of my attention right now away to love island. 08:02.678 --> 08:03.879 [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm drinking the coolade. 08:03.899 --> 08:09.863 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm distracting myself all the same, but I've found myself within the past few weeks, few months. 08:09.983 --> 08:17.048 [SPEAKER_00]: Even just this year, there's this annoying thought in the back of my head of uncertainty and like a little bit of hopelessness. 08:17.628 --> 08:22.732 [SPEAKER_00]: I would say, and that's so against my nature, but I don't know. 08:23.172 --> 08:26.716 [SPEAKER_00]: Having Trump in office has been tricky. 08:27.237 --> 08:28.438 [SPEAKER_00]: It's been hard to watch. 08:28.919 --> 08:36.808 [SPEAKER_00]: Having ice received so much funding hits me in my gut and watching the big beautiful bill get passed. 08:37.249 --> 08:39.632 [SPEAKER_00]: It hurts so much and 08:40.152 --> 08:51.600 [SPEAKER_00]: History repeats itself and I need to go back and learn so much so that I emailed my older advisor at school and I was asking how I could transfer credits to maybe go back to school. 08:51.660 --> 08:59.886 [SPEAKER_00]: That's one option I'm thinking because a lot of what I'm dealing with and the frustration I'm having is not from a full picture. 09:00.306 --> 09:08.652 [SPEAKER_00]: It's a lot based on what I'm seeing around in the physical world and also a little intuition than whatever bias news I'm receiving on my phone. 09:08.952 --> 09:14.596 [SPEAKER_00]: It's not a full picture, but then I have a lot of mistrust for systems, specifically in America. 09:14.616 --> 09:17.558 [SPEAKER_00]: And I would love to go to school internationally. 09:17.738 --> 09:19.359 [SPEAKER_00]: That would be a great option. 09:19.760 --> 09:22.702 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm interested in political science for the same time. 09:22.742 --> 09:23.202 [SPEAKER_00]: There's this 09:23.482 --> 09:32.415 [SPEAKER_00]: anarchist nature to me that's like why would I want to even be involved in the government but then at the same time it would be such an honor to sit and watch the United Nations. 09:32.675 --> 09:36.460 [SPEAKER_00]: This is my internal conflict and then I also want to enjoy my time. 09:36.480 --> 09:38.884 [SPEAKER_00]: I like to make my life feel 09:39.504 --> 09:58.149 [SPEAKER_00]: as blissful as possible so I try to take myself to the beach and I read and I write and I draw and I color and I organize and I swim and I run and I talk with my friends and I hang out and I celebrate and I party and all of the things trying to maintain joy in this sort of sadness. 09:58.509 --> 10:03.330 [SPEAKER_00]: I really opened the can of worms because I wanted it to be about my gripes of social media but 10:03.690 --> 10:12.714 [SPEAKER_00]: Truthfully, my major gripe is if I feel unsettled and don't feel like I can make a difference but then I'm distracted by making sure that I can pay my bills. 10:12.895 --> 10:24.140 [SPEAKER_00]: Therefore, based in the spot that my career is will ultimately distract you as well if that's not my intention and then I don't want to put my foot in my mouth because 10:24.660 --> 10:31.364 [SPEAKER_00]: I do have brand deals coming up with fun brands that I had a really good time creating the video for. 10:31.444 --> 10:37.427 [SPEAKER_00]: For example, I have one going out probably next week or so that my friend came over and we had a ball making it. 10:37.647 --> 10:41.149 [SPEAKER_00]: It's for an energy drink and we had a script written out. 10:41.489 --> 10:42.469 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to be a mess. 10:42.689 --> 10:47.492 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to be working on my coloring book because I really fell into coloring in the winter. 10:48.012 --> 10:50.993 [SPEAKER_00]: As many of us did, I got on the coloring book side of TikTok. 10:51.333 --> 10:52.314 [SPEAKER_00]: I got the markers. 10:52.474 --> 10:53.194 [SPEAKER_00]: I got involved. 10:53.454 --> 10:57.296 [SPEAKER_00]: And then an artist that I've been mutual with for ages. 10:57.316 --> 11:01.457 [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, she was even drawing images of me when I was a teenager. 11:01.517 --> 11:03.258 [SPEAKER_00]: So we've known each other for a long time. 11:03.638 --> 11:06.119 [SPEAKER_00]: We decided to make a coloring book together. 11:06.459 --> 11:07.800 [SPEAKER_00]: And that's in the works. 11:08.240 --> 11:09.181 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, it's so exciting. 11:09.341 --> 11:13.346 [SPEAKER_00]: I purchased the first sample of it yesterday, so I will get to see it. 11:13.706 --> 11:16.649 [SPEAKER_00]: And there's so many little Easter eggs in it from our lives. 11:16.769 --> 11:19.552 [SPEAKER_00]: And for example, there's an image of spoon in a spoon. 11:19.592 --> 11:20.994 [SPEAKER_00]: And it's really summary. 11:21.034 --> 11:23.797 [SPEAKER_00]: We have bikinis that you're going to be coloring in animals. 11:24.277 --> 11:25.158 [SPEAKER_00]: It's very Lexi. 11:25.458 --> 11:27.899 [SPEAKER_00]: My friend and I were making this video for an energy drink. 11:27.959 --> 11:29.460 [SPEAKER_00]: It's really like we're going to have you coloring. 11:29.480 --> 11:30.781 [SPEAKER_00]: You're going to be coming up with ideas. 11:30.821 --> 11:32.182 [SPEAKER_00]: The table is going to be a mess. 11:32.382 --> 11:38.967 [SPEAKER_00]: And then you'll suddenly go from having your hair in salt curls to being in your cute little outfit walking outside of a spoon blah blah blah. 11:38.987 --> 11:40.768 [SPEAKER_00]: It was a really fun video to make. 11:41.288 --> 11:56.770 [SPEAKER_00]: So two things can exist at once because on one hand when I'm posting that I don't want you to watch and be like oh she must have dreaded this like this is against her beliefs that was such a fun day to me and editing it was so fun but then in certain quiet moments 11:57.190 --> 11:58.691 [SPEAKER_00]: I have a pit in my stomach. 11:59.052 --> 12:00.853 [SPEAKER_00]: I don't want to contribute to the wrong thing. 12:01.333 --> 12:08.479 [SPEAKER_00]: I have also been taking job interviews on the side just to see what else is out there and I had the most heinous interview. 12:08.879 --> 12:14.563 [SPEAKER_00]: This guy was looking for a remote closer and so I applied for the position and we have an interview. 12:14.944 --> 12:16.965 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh my god, this man was a full scam. 12:17.445 --> 12:23.130 [SPEAKER_00]: He was a twenty-one-year-old kid that clearly was still in college drinking partying whatever. 12:23.710 --> 12:25.111 [SPEAKER_00]: and was selling me. 12:25.191 --> 12:40.035 [SPEAKER_00]: I don't even know what he was trying to sell me, but it was a whole mess of an interview and was basically describing different systems that he's using to basically bombard everyone's inbox to eventually get like millions and millions of dollars. 12:40.055 --> 12:42.236 [SPEAKER_00]: I was like, okay, first of all, it's going on. 12:42.316 --> 12:43.076 [SPEAKER_00]: How did I get here? 12:43.196 --> 12:43.976 [SPEAKER_00]: What is this? 12:44.277 --> 12:45.217 [SPEAKER_00]: Second of all, ew! 12:45.857 --> 12:47.378 [SPEAKER_00]: That's what you want to do with your life. 12:47.719 --> 12:56.545 [SPEAKER_00]: I saw another Tik Tok of this girl that I guess had dated a fairly large fitness Tik Toker and he's like, I mean, that's how you got to make money. 12:56.565 --> 12:59.848 [SPEAKER_00]: He was making tons of money and she was and he's like, you got to sell the losers. 12:59.868 --> 13:01.389 [SPEAKER_00]: You got to create products for losers. 13:01.829 --> 13:02.570 [SPEAKER_00]: Just like, what? 13:03.050 --> 13:04.891 [SPEAKER_00]: Why would I want to do that with my life? 13:05.192 --> 13:06.993 [SPEAKER_00]: And I want to feel good about my life. 13:07.113 --> 13:09.395 [SPEAKER_00]: I don't want to participate 13:09.915 --> 13:11.736 [SPEAKER_00]: In huge amounts of bullshit. 13:11.876 --> 13:29.425 [SPEAKER_00]: I mean it doesn't matter what point in time you were born I could have been born one hundred two hundred three hundred four hundred years ago There's always gonna be a little bullshit as much as I would love there to be not and but that's inevitable I don't want to be choosing it I don't want to go out of my way and be like yep that is the career path for me 13:30.005 --> 13:32.226 [SPEAKER_00]: But you know what I do have a new job with. 13:32.686 --> 13:34.967 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm working with a matchmaker. 13:35.728 --> 13:37.909 [SPEAKER_00]: I am helping with that. 13:37.969 --> 13:40.390 [SPEAKER_00]: So that's something I'm doing with my time. 13:40.750 --> 13:48.093 [SPEAKER_00]: The clientele is people that are a little bit not older, but more settled, more established, wealthy. 13:48.374 --> 13:49.734 [SPEAKER_00]: It's that sort of clientele. 13:49.914 --> 13:53.376 [SPEAKER_00]: It's based out of new port beach, but they have clients all over the globe. 13:53.756 --> 14:08.667 [SPEAKER_00]: So if you, or maybe an uncle, or an aunt, or divorce parent, widowed parent, single bachelor that you know would be interested, feel free to reach out to me over Instagram or email if you've been knowing someone that could benefit from a matchmaker. 14:08.827 --> 14:10.748 [SPEAKER_00]: It feels like millionaire matchmaker vibes. 14:11.029 --> 14:12.990 [SPEAKER_00]: Not the show, but that's sort of the essence. 14:13.030 --> 14:14.171 [SPEAKER_00]: That's something else I'm doing. 14:14.231 --> 14:15.912 [SPEAKER_00]: Don't I sound so excited about it? 14:15.932 --> 14:16.873 [SPEAKER_00]: I show it. 14:16.993 --> 14:21.216 [SPEAKER_00]: I just am overwhelmed and my happiness is wavering. 14:21.536 --> 14:22.317 [SPEAKER_00]: I feel sad. 14:22.717 --> 14:30.640 [SPEAKER_00]: I feel sad for everyone, but I also, as the great Casey Musgrave once said, you can go have you inside at the same time and I do. 14:31.101 --> 14:32.501 [SPEAKER_00]: I've had such a fun summer. 14:32.521 --> 14:34.942 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to Hawaii next week. 14:34.962 --> 14:36.823 [SPEAKER_00]: That's going to be amazing. 14:36.943 --> 14:39.464 [SPEAKER_00]: It's going to be so good. 14:40.064 --> 14:41.105 [SPEAKER_00]: See you then on the other hand. 14:41.698 --> 14:42.719 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm so excited for that. 14:42.779 --> 14:43.900 [SPEAKER_00]: I cannot wait for the vlog. 14:44.321 --> 14:46.323 [SPEAKER_00]: I love all the things I'm making. 14:46.603 --> 14:51.007 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm sad that the industry at large and I'm frustrated that I'm not quote unquote winning. 14:51.267 --> 14:56.432 [SPEAKER_00]: Take a shot every time I said quote unquote this episode for some reason that's really in the vernacular right now. 14:56.672 --> 15:04.280 [SPEAKER_00]: But I'm happy if I go to my vlogs, if I go to my channel, if I go to my Instagram, even if I go to my TikTok as non-sensical as it is, 15:04.700 --> 15:06.442 [SPEAKER_00]: I look and I'm like, yeah, that's fine. 15:06.462 --> 15:08.004 [SPEAKER_00]: Like I'm happy with who I am. 15:08.144 --> 15:10.667 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm just not happy with where we are globally. 15:11.027 --> 15:12.729 [SPEAKER_00]: And that's frustrating. 15:13.029 --> 15:14.130 [SPEAKER_00]: I want personal wins. 15:14.511 --> 15:15.712 [SPEAKER_00]: I want collective wins. 15:16.093 --> 15:19.957 [SPEAKER_00]: I want forward movement in a positive, happy, hopeful direction. 15:20.564 --> 15:24.246 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm a hopelessly optimistic person. 15:25.326 --> 15:26.646 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm a romantic person. 15:26.767 --> 15:29.808 [SPEAKER_00]: It's who I am and to watch so much disparity. 15:29.848 --> 15:30.748 [SPEAKER_00]: It's hard on the psyche. 15:30.928 --> 15:34.950 [SPEAKER_00]: But I'm going to why next week and it should be so much fun. 15:35.330 --> 15:35.970 [SPEAKER_00]: I need it. 15:36.290 --> 15:37.971 [SPEAKER_00]: I want to vacation so bad. 15:38.171 --> 15:39.272 [SPEAKER_00]: I want to be in a new beach. 15:39.932 --> 15:40.792 [SPEAKER_00]: I'll take any beach. 15:40.892 --> 15:42.173 [SPEAKER_00]: I'll take any beach at all. 15:42.573 --> 15:47.815 [SPEAKER_00]: Hawaii is obviously one of our states, but to have the continental United States and any chance for me to get away. 15:48.368 --> 15:50.571 [SPEAKER_00]: Even though, obviously, I'm an American. 15:51.092 --> 15:52.313 [SPEAKER_00]: Majority of my friends are American. 15:52.333 --> 15:53.174 [SPEAKER_00]: I love them all. 15:53.294 --> 15:55.077 [SPEAKER_00]: It's hard to be a proud American right now. 15:55.357 --> 15:55.898 [SPEAKER_00]: Really is. 15:55.918 --> 16:03.247 [SPEAKER_00]: And I've been channeling my romance and my optimism in a pair of social relationship with Nickelandria. 16:03.267 --> 16:05.831 [SPEAKER_00]: If you watch Love Island season seven, 16:06.431 --> 16:10.277 [SPEAKER_00]: I have been watching the fan edit. 16:10.297 --> 16:12.240 [SPEAKER_00]: I know every crum. 16:12.260 --> 16:14.483 [SPEAKER_00]: I have watched the wink so many times. 16:14.503 --> 16:17.006 [SPEAKER_00]: I have watched their kiss so many times. 16:17.547 --> 16:21.072 [SPEAKER_00]: I have watched her exit the villain and say I really want to find love. 16:21.092 --> 16:21.733 [SPEAKER_00]: I really do. 16:22.354 --> 16:23.094 [SPEAKER_00]: I've seen it all. 16:23.374 --> 16:24.115 [SPEAKER_00]: I love them. 16:24.575 --> 16:27.916 [SPEAKER_00]: It's the workings for a really beautiful partnership. 16:28.317 --> 16:31.458 [SPEAKER_00]: And that's what's bringing me the most joy right now. 16:31.958 --> 16:38.161 [SPEAKER_00]: There was a minute there when I sat down for this episode and I thought I'd love to talk exclusively about Nickel Andrea. 16:38.181 --> 16:41.242 [SPEAKER_00]: I'd love to have them on the podcast. 16:41.882 --> 16:48.325 [SPEAKER_00]: There are so many things I'd love to do in my life, but I'm overwhelmed and a little directionless. 16:48.705 --> 16:49.686 [SPEAKER_00]: That's not true. 16:49.706 --> 16:54.029 [SPEAKER_00]: I have so many directions that I want to go that I'm not going anywhere. 16:54.490 --> 16:58.333 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm spinning in circles instead of moving somewhere because I'll see a direction. 16:58.353 --> 17:01.715 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, oh, that road looks so fun. 17:02.056 --> 17:06.199 [SPEAKER_00]: And then I'll turn to my left and I'm like that road also looks like a really good time. 17:06.599 --> 17:11.103 [SPEAKER_00]: And then the one behind me is a really clean, street, so manicured. 17:11.123 --> 17:14.346 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, not my usual type, but how can someone resist? 17:14.726 --> 17:16.267 [SPEAKER_00]: And then I turn and there's another road. 17:16.327 --> 17:17.809 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, well, this one looks interesting. 17:17.849 --> 17:19.670 [SPEAKER_00]: I've never seen anything like this before. 17:20.131 --> 17:20.991 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm kind of curious. 17:21.292 --> 17:23.393 [SPEAKER_00]: And then I see another road and a bunch of my friends are there. 17:23.413 --> 17:24.715 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, I want to join the party. 17:24.755 --> 17:25.255 [SPEAKER_00]: Let's go. 17:26.516 --> 17:27.877 [SPEAKER_00]: That's where I've been at. 17:28.298 --> 17:31.161 [SPEAKER_00]: And then, of course, you've done make money to survive. 17:31.221 --> 17:32.902 [SPEAKER_00]: That part is so annoying. 17:32.982 --> 17:35.865 [SPEAKER_00]: I literally had a conversation with a potential sugar daddy. 17:36.045 --> 17:38.287 [SPEAKER_00]: Does that too much information? 17:38.848 --> 17:39.529 [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know. 17:39.549 --> 17:41.731 [SPEAKER_00]: I hit a point of desperation. 17:41.771 --> 17:43.653 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, should I talk to this man over telegram? 17:43.773 --> 17:44.754 [SPEAKER_00]: Whatever. 17:44.774 --> 17:47.817 [SPEAKER_00]: He's like, I think of this as charity work. 17:47.837 --> 17:49.778 [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm like, great, because I want to go back to school. 17:50.199 --> 17:51.020 [SPEAKER_00]: That's what I want. 17:51.460 --> 17:56.441 [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe I can have a random Trumpy man from Texas sponsor my education. 17:57.041 --> 17:58.002 [SPEAKER_00]: I'll take money. 17:58.442 --> 17:59.162 [SPEAKER_00]: Absolutely. 17:59.182 --> 18:00.722 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm just a girl. 18:00.742 --> 18:02.283 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm just a girl. 18:02.923 --> 18:04.183 [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm moody. 18:04.603 --> 18:05.904 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm feeling so moody. 18:05.984 --> 18:06.924 [SPEAKER_00]: So many different moods. 18:06.964 --> 18:10.985 [SPEAKER_00]: I think moody tends to be described when someone's having a bit of an attitude. 18:11.445 --> 18:12.765 [SPEAKER_00]: They're feeling sassy. 18:13.086 --> 18:14.146 [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe a little bitchy. 18:14.906 --> 18:20.208 [SPEAKER_00]: just feeling everything and it's not even my time of the month. 18:20.689 --> 18:27.972 [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't have an episode last week because I just couldn't get myself to come up with something worthy of sharing. 18:28.172 --> 18:32.554 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm being really hard on myself, but I'm hearing myself and I'm thinking that but I don't believe it. 18:32.614 --> 18:34.715 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, no, you could be harder on yourself. 18:35.015 --> 18:37.236 [SPEAKER_00]: You could hop inside at the same time. 18:37.256 --> 18:38.477 [SPEAKER_00]: That's where I'm at. 18:39.237 --> 18:47.640 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm just going to talk in circles now, so I would rather take a minute from today's sponsors and then get into all of your questions. 18:47.720 --> 18:49.521 [SPEAKER_00]: So without further ado. 18:54.283 --> 18:56.004 [SPEAKER_00]: First question is from Emily. 18:56.084 --> 19:00.605 [SPEAKER_00]: Do you think about moving back to NYC or being home to be around your dad? 19:01.166 --> 19:07.268 [SPEAKER_00]: Not only have I not a thought about going back to Virginia and NYC, I'm thinking about going internationally. 19:07.723 --> 19:09.123 [SPEAKER_00]: I gotta put myself first. 19:09.644 --> 19:11.364 [SPEAKER_00]: I gotta put myself first. 19:11.784 --> 19:18.706 [SPEAKER_00]: I want to find a clean, beautiful, scenic, and slightly metropolitan place to live. 19:19.086 --> 19:22.387 [SPEAKER_00]: And if it's not in English speaking country, I'll learn the language. 19:22.928 --> 19:24.248 [SPEAKER_00]: That's where I'm thinking right now. 19:24.708 --> 19:31.257 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not sure how to say your name, but you ask how to be single again after a long term relationship comes to an end. 19:31.678 --> 19:35.603 [SPEAKER_00]: When you're in a long term relationship, you start building partnered habits. 19:36.064 --> 19:41.612 [SPEAKER_00]: You think of them consciously or subconsciously and everything you do just based on routine. 19:42.092 --> 19:44.675 [SPEAKER_00]: Especially if you live together, spend a lot of your time together. 19:44.835 --> 19:56.667 [SPEAKER_00]: Whether that's meals or weekend plans, travel plans, there's always someone that you're communicating with about what you're thinking of doing if they want to come, what they're thinking of doing if you're going to join. 19:57.227 --> 20:16.471 [SPEAKER_00]: and how to be single it's such a beautiful time to take any of that external noise out the window and get in the car and put on the music you want to listen to and look at your calendar and figure out how you want to spend your time where you want to go if you're invited on a weekend trip and there's only one space left in the car 20:16.991 --> 20:22.875 [SPEAKER_00]: You can say yes to it without having to feel any sort of guilt or have to rearrange plans. 20:23.256 --> 20:28.099 [SPEAKER_00]: I almost feel like the list personalities and schedules you have to deal with, the more you're able to do. 20:28.359 --> 20:36.745 [SPEAKER_00]: So how to be single, I think this is the time to really give all of your needs a chance to be heard and no compromise needed. 20:37.145 --> 20:41.508 [SPEAKER_00]: Indicadest asked if I feel like my frontal lobe is developed. 20:41.788 --> 20:57.097 [SPEAKER_00]: I would have said no because I don't feel that different but then there's certain instances where I hear about things that I did before I was twenty-five and I think oh my god I would never do that now. 20:57.697 --> 21:03.641 [SPEAKER_00]: What was I thinking and the only conclusion I can come to is my frontal lobe wasn't developed. 21:04.041 --> 21:06.182 [SPEAKER_00]: Kaylee wants to know what's my comfort show. 21:06.702 --> 21:09.123 [SPEAKER_00]: I've watched YouTube for so long. 21:09.563 --> 21:12.164 [SPEAKER_00]: That is my go-to if no one's around for example. 21:12.364 --> 21:17.086 [SPEAKER_00]: My roommate was out of town for almost a month and I don't even think I turned on the TV like more than twice. 21:17.687 --> 21:33.193 [SPEAKER_00]: I don't even think to do it, whereas when I have a moment and I want to watch something, I go on to YouTube and I see what's in my subscriptions and I have different creators that all sort of binge Kendall Ray has been a go-to of mine for years, but it's always YouTube. 21:33.753 --> 21:37.339 [SPEAKER_00]: Ali Ricklin asked designer brands that are actually worth it. 21:37.819 --> 21:43.748 [SPEAKER_00]: Interesting question is I also think the definition of designer has been a little bit convoluted. 21:43.768 --> 21:48.676 [SPEAKER_00]: A lot of designers just have so many different lines that the quality is going to change 21:49.837 --> 21:56.742 [SPEAKER_00]: drastically and then we also have a lot of independent designers smaller designers because one of my first thoughts was tank air. 21:57.363 --> 21:58.884 [SPEAKER_00]: It's a small brand. 21:58.964 --> 22:00.365 [SPEAKER_00]: I want to say they're based out of LA. 22:00.785 --> 22:04.868 [SPEAKER_00]: It's the eighty five dollar tank tops and it's so worth it. 22:05.348 --> 22:07.470 [SPEAKER_00]: I almost need to make video. 22:07.590 --> 22:08.831 [SPEAKER_00]: See here's the thing it's like 22:09.331 --> 22:16.033 [SPEAKER_00]: I have this whole dialogue about not wanting to push products, but I would so gladly talk about tank air. 22:16.393 --> 22:17.713 [SPEAKER_00]: I really think it's worth it. 22:18.073 --> 22:20.254 [SPEAKER_00]: The cost per wear pays for itself. 22:20.594 --> 22:27.295 [SPEAKER_00]: I have tank tops that I've gotten at the thrift store and I think, okay, like this is only a dollar, fifty cents, whatever, but maybe I've worn it once. 22:27.916 --> 22:29.216 [SPEAKER_00]: I wear my tank air tank top. 22:29.296 --> 22:31.316 [SPEAKER_00]: I only have one and I'm ready to get two more. 22:31.336 --> 22:33.817 [SPEAKER_00]: I think I wear it maybe two to three times a week. 22:34.257 --> 22:38.819 [SPEAKER_00]: So that is a brand that I absolutely think is worth it if you're not familiar. 22:39.059 --> 22:41.300 [SPEAKER_00]: Tank air is a basic brand. 22:41.680 --> 22:45.702 [SPEAKER_00]: They're known for like their studio tank but they also have a lot of other silhouettes. 22:45.762 --> 22:49.743 [SPEAKER_00]: It's just a basic tank top but the fabric fits the body so well. 22:50.023 --> 22:55.846 [SPEAKER_00]: It just hugs the body and all the right places and it's really comfortable and it's not see through. 22:55.866 --> 22:58.527 [SPEAKER_00]: I have the gray one but I want a white and I want a black. 22:58.847 --> 23:00.788 [SPEAKER_00]: There's also some other silhouettes that I want. 23:01.008 --> 23:01.708 [SPEAKER_00]: I love that brand. 23:02.108 --> 23:05.630 [SPEAKER_00]: Another brand that I love, but I do have critiques about is Paloma Wall. 23:06.111 --> 23:13.655 [SPEAKER_00]: I think their silhouettes and their shapes, their imagery is beautiful and inspiring and I love it. 23:13.835 --> 23:19.739 [SPEAKER_00]: I also have such a soft spot for Spain in my heart that it's all the more reason for me to support. 23:19.759 --> 23:23.361 [SPEAKER_00]: They're based in Barcelona and they sometimes have pop ups in LA in New York. 23:23.781 --> 23:29.585 [SPEAKER_00]: But my one critique is I do think their shoes could improve on the quality. 23:30.125 --> 23:32.107 [SPEAKER_00]: I feel the same way with about the brand Mista. 23:32.587 --> 23:46.680 [SPEAKER_00]: Mista and Paloma Wall have silhouettes for shoes that I absolutely adore, but every single pair of Mista and Paloma Wall shoes that I purchased have needed to go to the cobbler at least once if not two or three times. 23:47.279 --> 23:51.782 [SPEAKER_00]: And I shouldn't have to take my shoes to the cobbler if they're bought first hand within the first year. 23:52.142 --> 23:52.803 [SPEAKER_00]: Absolutely not. 23:53.123 --> 24:03.550 [SPEAKER_00]: But I do have plumber wool accessories, like I have a bag, I may have two bags, and I have a belt, and I have a dress, and I do love them. 24:03.850 --> 24:05.371 [SPEAKER_00]: They are on the pricier side. 24:05.391 --> 24:07.933 [SPEAKER_00]: I almost feel like I should go into my closet. 24:08.413 --> 24:19.575 [SPEAKER_00]: As for high-end designer brands, I don't know if I've ever actually purchased something from the store first-hand besides a coach purse. 24:20.035 --> 24:24.696 [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, really anything I'm thinking of, I either got it second-hand or I didn't outlet. 24:24.836 --> 24:26.717 [SPEAKER_00]: Like, I love my Miumu wallet. 24:26.817 --> 24:27.717 [SPEAKER_00]: It's adorable. 24:28.017 --> 24:29.337 [SPEAKER_00]: It's plaid. 24:29.817 --> 24:33.098 [SPEAKER_00]: No, it's more of a specifically red and white gingham, and I love it. 24:33.538 --> 24:35.000 [SPEAKER_00]: I have product kidnails. 24:35.400 --> 24:37.763 [SPEAKER_00]: I purchased a lot on the real real, thread up. 24:38.144 --> 24:39.746 [SPEAKER_00]: A lot of second-hand shoes. 24:40.386 --> 24:45.373 [SPEAKER_00]: I love a little old-school, dull-changabana, like, product summer, kidnail. 24:45.773 --> 24:47.035 [SPEAKER_00]: I also love acne. 24:47.055 --> 24:50.098 [SPEAKER_00]: Like, when I'm in New York, I just want to be wearing acne. 24:50.539 --> 24:51.240 [SPEAKER_00]: I love it. 24:51.540 --> 24:52.241 [SPEAKER_00]: I think that's good. 24:52.627 --> 24:55.811 [SPEAKER_00]: Natalie asked, what are your favorite wellness habits? 24:56.431 --> 25:01.497 [SPEAKER_00]: A lot of my wellness habits are so ingrained in my brain that I don't even know that they're habits. 25:02.057 --> 25:03.559 [SPEAKER_00]: What are my favorite wellness habits? 25:03.659 --> 25:04.960 [SPEAKER_00]: I love physical activity. 25:05.160 --> 25:08.044 [SPEAKER_00]: I've started going back to training made this week and I missed it. 25:08.084 --> 25:13.930 [SPEAKER_00]: I think I took a week or two off because of Fourth of July and then spoon and it felt so good to get 25:14.370 --> 25:16.211 [SPEAKER_00]: your heart rate up and break a sweat. 25:16.832 --> 25:23.496 [SPEAKER_00]: That is one of the easiest ways for me to get my pent up energy out or any sort of anxious energy. 25:23.516 --> 25:28.339 [SPEAKER_00]: It feels so good to increase the heart rate and break a sweat. 25:28.939 --> 25:30.940 [SPEAKER_00]: Other wellness habits, I mean, I'm a sleeper. 25:30.960 --> 25:32.261 [SPEAKER_00]: I love sleeping. 25:32.481 --> 25:36.804 [SPEAKER_00]: If I don't think I got enough sleep, I'm so happy to take an app. 25:36.944 --> 25:38.645 [SPEAKER_00]: I will gladly take an app. 25:39.125 --> 25:40.246 [SPEAKER_00]: Give me thirty minutes. 25:40.526 --> 25:43.567 [SPEAKER_00]: If I'm lucky, maybe even an hour, love myself enough. 25:43.587 --> 25:54.013 [SPEAKER_00]: So, movement and sleep, which maybe you want to hear something a bit more niche, but those ones obviously make the biggest difference. 25:54.553 --> 25:59.236 [SPEAKER_00]: I also have to make a loaded water because the water and Los Angeles sucks. 25:59.776 --> 26:01.717 [SPEAKER_00]: The top water should be illegal. 26:02.368 --> 26:04.671 [SPEAKER_00]: You should be able to drink from your tap. 26:05.151 --> 26:06.913 [SPEAKER_00]: We live in a first world country. 26:06.993 --> 26:08.134 [SPEAKER_00]: Are you kidding me? 26:08.295 --> 26:14.922 [SPEAKER_00]: We are fully developed and I'm sitting here wondering in one of the states with the highest cost of living. 26:15.383 --> 26:18.065 [SPEAKER_00]: If I'm going to be sick drinking my tap water. 26:18.426 --> 26:21.710 [SPEAKER_00]: So one of my wellness habits has to be adding 26:22.230 --> 26:31.273 [SPEAKER_00]: Celtic salt or electrolyte powders or coconut water to my water to actually feel hydrated and I even have a filter on my sink and I still don't think it's good enough. 26:31.293 --> 26:32.454 [SPEAKER_00]: I have a filter on my shower. 26:32.474 --> 26:34.735 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm constantly having to filter things. 26:35.155 --> 26:36.635 [SPEAKER_00]: It's annoying, so a loaded water. 26:36.655 --> 26:46.119 [SPEAKER_00]: You know what I'm also gonna say is one of my favorite wellness techniques is reading, writing, drawing, any sort of activity with my hands. 26:46.639 --> 26:47.999 [SPEAKER_00]: is helpful for me. 26:48.399 --> 26:54.440 [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm telling you the tools I've been using to make art recently are markers and crayons and colored pencils. 26:54.700 --> 26:57.941 [SPEAKER_00]: I've gone full rudimentary back to the basics. 26:58.321 --> 26:59.401 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm in kindergarten. 26:59.641 --> 27:02.802 [SPEAKER_00]: I have a little sketchbook and I draw anything. 27:02.962 --> 27:08.103 [SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes I draw really stupid things and I'm like that's so ugly. 27:08.483 --> 27:09.223 [SPEAKER_00]: Why did I do that? 27:09.303 --> 27:11.443 [SPEAKER_00]: Or this looks like a girl in third grade drew it. 27:11.844 --> 27:12.784 [SPEAKER_00]: Who cares? 27:12.984 --> 27:13.984 [SPEAKER_00]: It was so fun. 27:14.424 --> 27:19.968 [SPEAKER_00]: And from that, I've ended up making all of my friends birthday cards since I've gotten my new sketchbook. 27:20.409 --> 27:21.670 [SPEAKER_00]: And it's so much fun. 27:21.690 --> 27:25.813 [SPEAKER_00]: I love decorating someone's gift, wrapping it up really nicely. 27:26.073 --> 27:27.234 [SPEAKER_00]: It's fun to do. 27:27.254 --> 27:30.717 [SPEAKER_00]: I would also also argue, this is one of my favorite secrets of the world. 27:31.117 --> 27:39.444 [SPEAKER_00]: One of the reasons I like you don't believe in a higher power, like the fact that our brains get, I don't know what chemicals are really lack of a better. 27:40.064 --> 27:42.525 [SPEAKER_00]: amount of knowledge they get off to helping people. 27:42.545 --> 27:45.706 [SPEAKER_00]: I think that's one of the little tricks. 27:46.287 --> 27:49.188 [SPEAKER_00]: We would have not prospered as a civilization. 27:49.268 --> 27:54.550 [SPEAKER_00]: If we didn't have this little aspect, but a wellness habit is to do things for others. 27:55.230 --> 28:04.994 [SPEAKER_00]: Sounds obtuse, but to listen, to gift, to show, love, and pay attention to your friends, your family, your community. 28:05.194 --> 28:06.555 [SPEAKER_00]: That's a wellness habit. 28:07.235 --> 28:08.495 [SPEAKER_00]: Don't call me serity. 28:09.096 --> 28:12.196 [SPEAKER_00]: How do balance discipline and a routine with care-freeness? 28:12.757 --> 28:21.819 [SPEAKER_00]: This is one of my favorite things about self-employment, but I think this could be applied outside of this, but I'm more or less having idea of what my week is going to look like. 28:22.219 --> 28:29.941 [SPEAKER_00]: So I can divide my projects out and I am able to allow myself flexibility in regards to my day. 28:30.721 --> 28:34.362 [SPEAKER_00]: So if I feel in the zone, I wake up early. 28:34.382 --> 28:36.622 [SPEAKER_00]: I get on my computer, I get the work done. 28:37.182 --> 28:40.823 [SPEAKER_00]: I may have done three days worth of work in one day. 28:40.843 --> 28:46.425 [SPEAKER_00]: Then yeah, if I feel like going to the beach on a Tuesday, I'm sure it's all going to do it. 28:46.885 --> 28:52.686 [SPEAKER_00]: If my friend has a government holiday and wants to do a little road trip, I'm so game. 28:53.166 --> 28:56.269 [SPEAKER_00]: It allows me to be a little bit more carefree. 28:56.289 --> 29:01.013 [SPEAKER_00]: I also think it's important to not have such requirements. 29:01.373 --> 29:11.382 [SPEAKER_00]: If you need to decompress so much so that you need to numb yourself out with hours of phone time or TV or junk food or whatever it is, you need to change something in your day. 29:11.642 --> 29:14.225 [SPEAKER_00]: You need to work on shifting your living habits. 29:14.725 --> 29:24.539 [SPEAKER_00]: You're living space who you're living with or your job something bigger is an issue because you shouldn't need that much time to decompress to feel back to zero. 29:25.020 --> 29:30.328 [SPEAKER_00]: I don't think that's healthy because I wanted to say you should be a little bit more carefree and you're free time. 29:30.728 --> 29:35.753 [SPEAKER_00]: I think a lot of people spend it numbing themselves when you could be enriching yourself. 29:36.054 --> 29:40.978 [SPEAKER_00]: So I'm able to be disciplined because I feel enriched in my free time. 29:41.159 --> 29:46.344 [SPEAKER_00]: Of course I'm human and I have times where I do need to decompress and have a full duvet day where 29:46.744 --> 29:47.485 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm off my phone. 29:47.525 --> 29:48.166 [SPEAKER_00]: You can't call me. 29:48.206 --> 29:48.907 [SPEAKER_00]: You can't reach me. 29:48.967 --> 29:50.328 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not answering. 29:50.809 --> 29:53.872 [SPEAKER_00]: Or I do want to sit in bed and I want to watch YouTube for hours and hours. 29:53.892 --> 29:55.154 [SPEAKER_00]: That's fine. 29:55.434 --> 30:07.108 [SPEAKER_00]: But my long, maybe confusing answer is that as long as you're getting what you need to get done, you should allow yourself to be a little bit more of a yes man. 30:07.648 --> 30:14.149 [SPEAKER_00]: In your time, take a little evening stroll after dinner instead of watching that TV show or to take a bike ride or something. 30:14.209 --> 30:15.349 [SPEAKER_00]: It couldn't reach you more. 30:15.369 --> 30:17.750 [SPEAKER_00]: To give yourself a little bit more novelty. 30:17.890 --> 30:21.030 [SPEAKER_00]: It aids to a more fun, carefree life. 30:21.450 --> 30:22.391 [SPEAKER_00]: Madey Armstrong. 30:22.531 --> 30:24.651 [SPEAKER_00]: Wow, I haven't heard tears in even a minute. 30:24.971 --> 30:28.452 [SPEAKER_00]: Would you rather have a conversation with a jellyfish or a sea turtle? 30:28.992 --> 30:30.612 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh my god, a sea turtle. 30:31.092 --> 30:33.992 [SPEAKER_00]: Aren't turtles the oldest animal that we have? 30:34.053 --> 30:36.433 [SPEAKER_00]: Like they're back from the dinosaur times. 30:37.083 --> 30:38.424 [SPEAKER_00]: You can tell I haven't been in school in a while. 30:39.305 --> 30:41.226 [SPEAKER_00]: But turtles live forever. 30:41.286 --> 30:42.887 [SPEAKER_00]: We're talking triple digits. 30:43.468 --> 30:45.449 [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, let me talk to Grandpa C turtle. 30:46.190 --> 30:47.350 [SPEAKER_00]: Happy to answer this question. 30:47.571 --> 30:48.651 [SPEAKER_00]: Kurt six ninety two. 30:48.671 --> 30:52.614 [SPEAKER_00]: I had to deal with social media's narrative that anything past twenty five is old like I'm just starting. 30:53.135 --> 30:54.916 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, that is absolute nonsense. 30:55.096 --> 30:58.619 [SPEAKER_00]: Also anyone who says that is under twenty five. 30:58.699 --> 31:02.321 [SPEAKER_00]: Once you get to twenty five, you're like, I feel so much younger than I thought I would. 31:02.562 --> 31:04.423 [SPEAKER_00]: Fifth grade me thought twenty five was grandpa. 31:04.943 --> 31:06.984 [SPEAKER_00]: I still have my child like energy. 31:07.405 --> 31:08.485 [SPEAKER_00]: I still feel youthful. 31:08.665 --> 31:19.292 [SPEAKER_00]: And I also have always admired my grandparents and a lot of people in their sixty seventies, eighties, and I have plans for those decades of my life. 31:19.532 --> 31:24.835 [SPEAKER_00]: I want to be modeling, serums, and moisturizers as a senior citizen. 31:24.915 --> 31:26.777 [SPEAKER_00]: I want to be playing the grandma in the movies. 31:27.237 --> 31:28.838 [SPEAKER_00]: I have plans for different decades. 31:29.218 --> 31:31.079 [SPEAKER_00]: My twenties is only one aspect of it. 31:31.199 --> 31:33.741 [SPEAKER_00]: There is so much time to do so many things in your life. 31:34.181 --> 32:00.737 [SPEAKER_00]: and make all of your variety of dreams come true that twenty five we're just warming up a lay asked you ever talks to go all the time one of my prayers was answered almost immediately on Monday I was supposed to go on this date with a guy at seven thirty and I got home I said I don't want to do it Tyra I do not want to go on this date boom message from him so sorry got stuck at work 32:01.097 --> 32:01.818 [SPEAKER_00]: can't make it. 32:01.898 --> 32:02.800 [SPEAKER_00]: Can we rain check? 32:03.200 --> 32:04.302 [SPEAKER_00]: Absolutely. 32:04.322 --> 32:05.945 [SPEAKER_00]: It wasn't within the minute. 32:06.025 --> 32:07.307 [SPEAKER_00]: I said I don't want to do this. 32:07.707 --> 32:08.589 [SPEAKER_00]: God said fine. 32:08.909 --> 32:09.570 [SPEAKER_00]: You don't have to. 32:09.630 --> 32:10.892 [SPEAKER_00]: Girl, let me take care of it for you. 32:10.952 --> 32:14.077 [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't even have to come up with some dumb excuse for me not to go. 32:14.698 --> 32:15.880 [SPEAKER_00]: So that was beautiful. 32:16.300 --> 32:20.601 [SPEAKER_00]: But I talked to God about things beyond just not wanting to go on a date. 32:21.261 --> 32:30.603 [SPEAKER_00]: And I think it's helpful to talk to yourself at the very least if you're not a believer in something higher than yourself than talk to yourself when you're alone. 32:30.663 --> 32:31.423 [SPEAKER_00]: Talk out loud. 32:32.043 --> 32:35.784 [SPEAKER_00]: May Louise, night shower, morning shower, night shower. 32:36.344 --> 32:40.005 [SPEAKER_00]: If I take a morning shower, I get way too relaxed and I'm ready to get back in bed. 32:40.541 --> 32:41.461 [SPEAKER_00]: Like, oh, I'm clean. 32:41.501 --> 32:45.043 [SPEAKER_00]: Let me put on something soft and comfortable and get right back into bed. 32:45.764 --> 32:46.764 [SPEAKER_00]: So, night shower. 32:47.284 --> 32:50.866 [SPEAKER_00]: Morgan Lumbard, would you rather be a cow or a pig? 32:51.426 --> 32:52.207 [SPEAKER_00]: Neither really. 32:52.227 --> 32:58.570 [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe like a beautiful cow and a pasture with lots of space, but really neither. 32:59.220 --> 33:03.705 [SPEAKER_00]: Romsham asks, what are fun ways to bring life to a low energy party? 33:03.725 --> 33:07.289 [SPEAKER_00]: I really have enjoyed this new game. 33:07.729 --> 33:14.497 [SPEAKER_00]: It's new to me, it might not be new to you, but I'm happy to teach you where it's based on opinion and biases. 33:14.857 --> 33:19.302 [SPEAKER_00]: And I love that, because what do people love more than sharing their opinion? 33:19.542 --> 33:19.842 [SPEAKER_00]: Nothing. 33:20.966 --> 33:22.547 [SPEAKER_00]: You think of a number between one and ten. 33:22.888 --> 33:26.671 [SPEAKER_00]: And let's say I'm with a group of people and I'm the one guessing. 33:26.751 --> 33:30.334 [SPEAKER_00]: So I'll close my eyes and then I'll decide amongst themselves the number. 33:30.654 --> 33:32.576 [SPEAKER_00]: Let's say the number is ten. 33:32.916 --> 33:34.537 [SPEAKER_00]: Ten is like absolute favorite. 33:35.018 --> 33:36.038 [SPEAKER_00]: One is disgusting. 33:36.259 --> 33:37.740 [SPEAKER_00]: Would never wanted in my life. 33:38.100 --> 33:40.941 [SPEAKER_00]: And I would give all of them a category. 33:40.961 --> 33:44.143 [SPEAKER_00]: So I would say Tyra City's to travel to. 33:44.163 --> 33:46.344 [SPEAKER_00]: I would say John appetizers. 33:46.564 --> 33:49.785 [SPEAKER_00]: I would say Josh, you're going to pick out books. 33:50.165 --> 33:52.106 [SPEAKER_00]: You're going to say condiments. 33:52.186 --> 33:54.027 [SPEAKER_00]: You can pick whatever category you want. 33:54.207 --> 33:58.449 [SPEAKER_00]: And the way that you guess the number is through listening to their answer to those categories. 33:58.909 --> 34:00.511 [SPEAKER_00]: So Tyra could say Paris. 34:00.931 --> 34:01.993 [SPEAKER_00]: I forget what I asked John. 34:02.433 --> 34:05.116 [SPEAKER_00]: Josh could say, I don't know what Josh's favorite book is. 34:05.436 --> 34:09.020 [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe something her rookie more a call me, and I'm comparing all their answers. 34:09.120 --> 34:10.542 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, oh, I said appetizers. 34:10.922 --> 34:15.847 [SPEAKER_00]: So someone said, case of dip, Paris, her rookie more a call me honey mustard. 34:15.887 --> 34:18.150 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, okay, these are all these are tops here. 34:18.710 --> 34:38.478 [SPEAKER_00]: So I'm gonna guess that the number is ten and that's a fun thing to do because you don't really need to share too much about yourself But you get to share a little and I like that and that's a fun way to break the ice at a low energy party It also doesn't require anyone to move so that's good my phone is being a little glitchy so I'm gonna finish the episode off here 34:38.998 --> 34:54.247 [SPEAKER_00]: And if you're a Patreon member, you always get an ad free extended episode, so I will get into that now, and I can give you a deeper dive into all of the clums that I've been having internally, but also how I'm working through it, and I'll give you just a little bit of the dirty or details. 34:54.707 --> 34:56.588 [SPEAKER_00]: And then for everyone else, thank you so much for listening. 34:56.628 --> 34:58.029 [SPEAKER_00]: I hope you guys enjoyed this episode. 34:58.469 --> 35:03.232 [SPEAKER_00]: If you made it this far, truly thank you because I had to really walk through this one. 35:03.472 --> 35:05.253 [SPEAKER_00]: And I appreciate you guys so much. 35:05.573 --> 35:12.417 [SPEAKER_00]: And if you like this show, give it a like, rate it, leave a comment on the podcast app on Spotify. 35:12.437 --> 35:14.438 [SPEAKER_00]: It means a lot and it helps out the show. 35:14.759 --> 35:16.139 [SPEAKER_00]: Other than that, I will talk to you all later. 35:16.400 --> 35:17.540 [SPEAKER_00]: XOXO, Lexi.