[SPEAKER_00]: Dan is in the night.
[SPEAKER_00]: Welcome to another episode of the Makab, the terrifying.
[SPEAKER_00]: Tonight, let's drop in on a boys' night out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Ah, yes.
[SPEAKER_00]: What could be better than relaxing with close friends and unwinding?
[SPEAKER_00]: But our protagonist begins to really unwind.
[SPEAKER_00]: When he discovers something horrifying underneath his good friends, Sikh.
[SPEAKER_00]: This story is called as long as the door stays closed and was written by D.D.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wickman.
[SPEAKER_00]: I've always had Wallace and Dan in my life.
[SPEAKER_00]: These two are not just my best friends, but the closest thing to family I've ever had.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can't remember a time when they weren't a part of my life.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not a matter of obsessing over one another.
[SPEAKER_00]: They've just always been there for me.
[SPEAKER_00]: I care for them like they were my own foot or an arm.
[SPEAKER_00]: They just have to be there for things to work, you know?
[SPEAKER_00]: Things weren't going so well for me back in those days.
[SPEAKER_00]: Most of the time I sat at home, isolating myself.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't eat much, I slept even worse.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was stuck in a dark place, and I couldn't really force myself out of it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Luckily, I didn't have to.
[SPEAKER_00]: I had people in my life who cared enough to take that step for me, and my buddies were adamant about bringing me back on my feet.
[SPEAKER_00]: Straighten my back, so to speak.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace put together a bit of a celebration.
[SPEAKER_00]: First, drinks it his place.
[SPEAKER_00]: Chicken wings, cheese snacks, and poker.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then, take an Uber downtown for more drinks and meeting some people.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan had some friends from work we were gonna hang out with.
[SPEAKER_00]: Good people, like a work family, he said.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not my usual deal, but I could see that I needed to make an effort.
[SPEAKER_00]: So I dug around in my closet until I found something colorful and went to spend a night with the boys.
[SPEAKER_00]: We were originally going to Dan's place, but his sister was in town and needed to crash on his couch.
[SPEAKER_00]: She was welcome to come along, but she wasn't up to it.
[SPEAKER_00]: So, at the last minute, we switched to Wallace's place, a rowhouse on a rundown street, but in a good part of town.
[SPEAKER_00]: The kind of street that has a cigarette infused corner shop just across from a whole foods.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace and Dan met me out by the curb.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think he's taken his medicine, Wally.
[SPEAKER_00]: Said Dan.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'd have to agree, Dan.
[SPEAKER_00]: Said Wally.
[SPEAKER_00]: They always did this thing where they kept repeating each other's names when they wanted to make a point.
[SPEAKER_00]: I could see where this was going a mile away.
[SPEAKER_00]: Good thing we had a chat with Dr. Heinigan.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not a Dan.
[SPEAKER_00]: We know your dosage.
[SPEAKER_00]: And if he got it wrong, we got three six packs a second opinions from Nurse Guinness.
[SPEAKER_00]: Added Wallace.
[SPEAKER_00]: Nurses can't write prescriptions.
[SPEAKER_00]: I added.
[SPEAKER_00]: They can and Canada.
[SPEAKER_00]: Grinned Dan.
[SPEAKER_00]: Look it up.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's true.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's don't look like Ontario to me.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said.
[SPEAKER_00]: But I get your point.
[SPEAKER_00]: The man is down bad.
[SPEAKER_00]: Huffed Wallace.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's gonna need all the help he can get.
[SPEAKER_00]: We settled down around the dinner table, had some chicken wings, a couple of beers, and talked for a while.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace had a pretty bare-bones place, not much stuff on the walls.
[SPEAKER_00]: A living room, a bedroom, and a small guest room that doubled his emergency storage.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was the kind of bachelor pad that had a slight echo to it if you listen closely.
[SPEAKER_00]: But it had all the essentials, a nice couch, a big TV, and a bed that hadn't had its sheets changed for a solid two months.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan talked a lot about his sister coming to town.
[SPEAKER_00]: How she kept nagging him about pointless things.
[SPEAKER_00]: How he was the one helping her out, and she acted like she was the one taking care of him.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not the one who cheated on my husband and got kicked out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan scoffed.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not the one who quit my job on a whim to slack on my little brother's couch.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're right.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, this added.
[SPEAKER_00]: You'd be very faithful to your husband.
[SPEAKER_00]: Bless your heart.
[SPEAKER_00]: Damn straight.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan nodded.
[SPEAKER_00]: Too bad I'm into women.
[SPEAKER_00]: Shame.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said.
[SPEAKER_00]: Todd, marry you.
[SPEAKER_00]: Of course you would.
[SPEAKER_00]: You both would.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm amazing.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace whipped out a deck of cards and put something on Netflix in the background.
[SPEAKER_00]: Some reality show.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace usually like to have a lot of sounds going on around him.
[SPEAKER_00]: He didn't like it when things got too quiet.
[SPEAKER_00]: He was from a big family so it didn't take much for him to feel alone.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was on the opposite side of the spectrum being an only child.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan was somewhere in the middle.
[SPEAKER_00]: But two of them might sound like idiots, but they were more successful than people give them credit for.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace worked with overseas shipping, and Dan was a shift manager at a bottling plant.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not the kind of titles that needed years of study to reach, but the kind of positions that require a good head on your shoulders.
[SPEAKER_00]: They were solid people, great under pressure, and honest to a fault.
[SPEAKER_00]: We played a couple of rounds, chit chatting between games.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace was a great bluffer.
[SPEAKER_00]: The only thing you can know for sure is that whatever you thought he had, he had something different.
[SPEAKER_00]: But when you figured that out, he changes to something else.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's the kind of player who always plays the person and not the cards, and he is damn good at it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan, on the other hand, is a wild card.
[SPEAKER_00]: He can go all in on the most random nonsense, but he can also quit when he's far ahead.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's a complete fluke, but sometimes that's what it takes to be the guy like Wallace.
[SPEAKER_00]: We'd been playing for about an hour when I had to use the bathroom.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hurried away, locked the door, did my business, and reached for a towel to dry my hands.
[SPEAKER_00]: Problem was, Wallace's bathroom was downright nasty.
[SPEAKER_00]: Toothpaste flicks on the bathroom mirror, and a funky smell seeping into the guest hand towels.
[SPEAKER_00]: I could tell they'd been there for a while.
[SPEAKER_00]: Most things had this faint yellow tinge.
[SPEAKER_00]: I decided to get a fresh towel.
[SPEAKER_00]: I figured he had a couple hidden away for fancy company, so I dug through a pile of fresh laundry.
[SPEAKER_00]: Nothing peculiar there.
[SPEAKER_00]: I dug around some more.
[SPEAKER_00]: As I did, I heard the guys call out from the other room, telling me where to find more toilet paper if needed.
[SPEAKER_00]: There was a cabinet under the sink.
[SPEAKER_00]: A big one.
[SPEAKER_00]: It didn't have any handles, but I could tell you could open it.
[SPEAKER_00]: There was a magnet on the side.
[SPEAKER_00]: So I slid a finger in there and pulled it open.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it had some kind of lock because there was a bit of a forceful click.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think I broke it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Something small spilled out and moved across my arms.
[SPEAKER_00]: Magnets.
[SPEAKER_00]: Fat little white things.
[SPEAKER_00]: Contracting and extending in a sickly rhythm.
[SPEAKER_00]: They were all over the inside of the cabinet.
[SPEAKER_00]: At first, it looked like Wallace had crammed a big black trash bag in there, but looking a little closer, the details got clearer.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was a corpse.
[SPEAKER_00]: The body was wrapped in a black shirt and dark jeans.
[SPEAKER_00]: No shoes or socks.
[SPEAKER_00]: It had decayed into a desaturated, grayish green, almost mummified.
[SPEAKER_00]: thin brown hair stretching down a wrinkled forehead, wide open mouth and hollowed out eyes, bone yellow teeth like bars to an insect prison.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's where the smell came from.
[SPEAKER_00]: It wasn't just an unwashed bathroom, there was a dead body, a real, actual, deceased human body.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yoke in there?
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace called out.
[SPEAKER_00]: He needs something?
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm good.
[SPEAKER_00]: My voice was cracking.
[SPEAKER_00]: My arms shook as my heartbeat engulfed every other sound.
[SPEAKER_00]: I tried brushing off the maggots that had crawled up on me, but I kept finding more and more.
[SPEAKER_00]: I had to think fast.
[SPEAKER_00]: I brought out my phone and dropped it on the floor, squashing another maggot.
[SPEAKER_00]: I picked the phone back up and snapped a couple of pictures of the body.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then I grabbed a handful of toilet paper, cleaned up the maggots that had gotten out, and flushed them.
[SPEAKER_00]: I put everything back the way it was, but the door kept swinging open a little.
[SPEAKER_00]: I washed my hands again and stood by the mirror for a moment.
[SPEAKER_00]: I honestly thought I was having a nightmare.
[SPEAKER_00]: I couldn't fathom this being something real.
[SPEAKER_00]: A dead body in Wallace's bathroom?
[SPEAKER_00]: No wonder he didn't want us to be here for the pre-party.
[SPEAKER_00]: No wonder he was asking what was taking me so long.
[SPEAKER_00]: If he thought I knew, what would he do?
[SPEAKER_00]: I wiped my hands on the nasty hand towels and went back outside.
[SPEAKER_00]: The air felt warmer, but I think it was just me.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan had brought out a cheese plate and some crackers.
[SPEAKER_00]: My eyes got stuck on the sharp cheese knife that was waiting on the far side of the table.
[SPEAKER_00]: As I sat down, Dan handed it to me away from Wallace.
[SPEAKER_00]: You gotta try this cheddar, he said.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know I don't care for Wisconsin, but this thing might just change my mind.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I'll try it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm muttered.
[SPEAKER_00]: Little piece.
[SPEAKER_00]: My honorable dude, I'm giving you three.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're gonna want three.
[SPEAKER_00]: All right.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace had this ambient smile, and he noticed me staring.
[SPEAKER_00]: His face didn't move a muscle.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm sure he could see something in me had changed, but he didn't buckle.
[SPEAKER_00]: He just let my eyes stick to his.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's good cheese.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace smiled.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think you'll like it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Gotta pace myself.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said, stomach's not what it used to be.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, you were in there a long time.
[SPEAKER_00]: He continued.
[SPEAKER_00]: For a long time.
[SPEAKER_00]: We played a couple more rounds, passing the cheese plate around.
[SPEAKER_00]: Whenever Wallace picked it up, he did this little flick of the wrist that gave the blade a rushing noise.
[SPEAKER_00]: Like he held it upside down, and then flicked it up with a swoosh.
[SPEAKER_00]: It kept breaking my concentration, and I lost three hands in a row.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wasn't even close.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't have the slightest idea what to do.
[SPEAKER_00]: I had pictures on my phone.
[SPEAKER_00]: I could excuse myself and call the police, but could I leave Dan alone with him?
[SPEAKER_00]: Should I bring him along?
[SPEAKER_00]: But wouldn't Wallace figure out that I knew if I suddenly got up and left?
[SPEAKER_00]: There was also the possibility that I was wrong somehow, that Wallace hadn't done anything, that this was
[SPEAKER_00]: something else.
[SPEAKER_00]: The body looked really old.
[SPEAKER_00]: If it had been fresh, the whole building would have smelled like death.
[SPEAKER_00]: The body must have been dead for months.
[SPEAKER_00]: but that didn't matter.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace had lived here for years.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan took a short break to use the bathroom, leaving me alone with Wallace.
[SPEAKER_00]: The reality show lingered in the background, covering the room in Valley Girl Banner.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace kept his eyes on me as I held the cheese plate near.
[SPEAKER_00]: More importantly, I kept the knife close.
[SPEAKER_00]: I thought you didn't want to rush your stomach.
[SPEAKER_00]: He said, your hog and the cheese there
[SPEAKER_00]: I guess Dan was right.
[SPEAKER_00]: I nodded.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's good.
[SPEAKER_00]: Mind handing me that knife?
[SPEAKER_00]: He asked.
[SPEAKER_00]: I want to cut a few slices.
[SPEAKER_00]: How many you want?
[SPEAKER_00]: I asked.
[SPEAKER_00]: I want to do it myself.
[SPEAKER_00]: He said.
[SPEAKER_00]: No offense, but you cut him too thick.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's fine.
[SPEAKER_00]: I got you.
[SPEAKER_00]: I insisted.
[SPEAKER_00]: How many you want?
[SPEAKER_00]: A frown formed on Wallace's face, subtle, but it was there.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not suspicion, but something else.
[SPEAKER_00]: Frustration.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe he didn't know.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe I was getting away with it.
[SPEAKER_00]: The discussion burst like a bubble as Dan came back with a vengeance.
[SPEAKER_00]: Salt, lemon, tequila shots.
[SPEAKER_00]: All the while, I could tell Wallace had noticed me keeping a close eye on the cheese knife.
[SPEAKER_00]: The reality show got stuck on a, are you still watching verification check, underlining just how quiet things had gotten.
[SPEAKER_00]: Just the sound of cards being shuffled and flipped, the occasional clink of a glass.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan offered me another shot, but I turned it down.
[SPEAKER_00]: My head was already swimming.
[SPEAKER_00]: You want something fancier?
[SPEAKER_00]: He asked.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a special night, now's a good time to ask.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not really, I'm good, I said.
[SPEAKER_00]: A thought crossed my mind, and I held up a finger.
[SPEAKER_00]: I pointed to Wallace's casually as my body allowed.
[SPEAKER_00]: By the way, I continued.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't you have that other card game in your car?
[SPEAKER_00]: The one with the white cards and the nasty jokes?
[SPEAKER_00]: In my car, Wallace asked.
[SPEAKER_00]: You sure?
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I think you brought it along last time we went out?
[SPEAKER_00]: Funny, Wallace said.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's funny.
[SPEAKER_00]: No, really.
[SPEAKER_00]: I insisted.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm pretty sure you added.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace didn't quite catch what I was going for.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan, on the other hand, got up from his chair and pointed at the bedroom.
[SPEAKER_00]: He means cards against humanity, Wallace.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think you got it in your bedroom.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan wandered off before I could protest.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'd wanted to get Wallace separated so I could show Dan what was in the bathroom.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now I was stuck with Wallace again.
[SPEAKER_00]: He gave me a curious look.
[SPEAKER_00]: You good?
[SPEAKER_00]: He asked.
[SPEAKER_00]: You don't seem all there, you know?
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't know what to say.
[SPEAKER_00]: And by the time I'd figured out a good enough lie to much time it passed, he could tell I wasn't being genuine.
[SPEAKER_00]: Despite all the drinks I'd had, my tongue was dry as sand.
[SPEAKER_00]: I gave him a shrug and sipped my lukewarm hynicking.
[SPEAKER_00]: Ah, I don't know, I said.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's uh, it's been crazy.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're telling me, he chuckled.
[SPEAKER_00]: Man, I get it.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like, when it rains it pours, you know?
[SPEAKER_00]: One day and it's all upside down inside out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I nodded.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes it all just happens.
[SPEAKER_00]: The image of the dead body flashed in my mind.
[SPEAKER_00]: The strangest details stuck with me, like how long the teeth looked behind the retracted gums.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're all teeth that long, it may be hyper aware of my mouth, making me smack my lips.
[SPEAKER_00]: Change takes time.
[SPEAKER_00]: Lawless nodded.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're here if you need it.
[SPEAKER_00]: And with that, he leaned across the table.
[SPEAKER_00]: I thought he was going to pat me on the hand, but instead he snatched the cheese plate and the knife.
[SPEAKER_00]: He grinned as he cut up a piece of cheddar, giving me a rise smile.
[SPEAKER_00]: No hogging the cheese.
[SPEAKER_00]: He grinned.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not cool.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan came back empty handed.
[SPEAKER_00]: He'd found some other board games, but we figured we shouldn't start monopoly this late.
[SPEAKER_00]: Besides, it didn't go well with Tequila.
[SPEAKER_00]: We turned back to poker.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace put on another episode of that show.
[SPEAKER_00]: We discussed the details of where we were going and who we were going to meet.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace kept talking about this guy from work that couldn't be there, to the point where it made me take note.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was strange for Wallace to bring it up out of the blue.
[SPEAKER_00]: No one had asked.
[SPEAKER_00]: Was he inadvertently telling us who the corpse was?
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't have a lot of friends at work.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace admitted,
[SPEAKER_00]: I think y'all would like Chris.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's a nice guy.
[SPEAKER_00]: He could be the nicest guy in the world, but we're going out for the Dames.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan said matter of factly.
[SPEAKER_00]: Test is the way it is.
[SPEAKER_00]: Why couldn't Chris come?
[SPEAKER_00]: I asked.
[SPEAKER_00]: He busy?
[SPEAKER_00]: Not sure.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace said with a shrug.
[SPEAKER_00]: Preoccupied.
[SPEAKER_00]: During our next couple of rounds, I had another tactic.
[SPEAKER_00]: I made sure our glasses were topped off.
[SPEAKER_00]: Both me and Dan had already used the bathroom, so I figured I could get Wallace to go next.
[SPEAKER_00]: That had given me some time alone with Dan.
[SPEAKER_00]: I made sure everyone drank, and like clockwork, Wallace excused himself for the restroom.
[SPEAKER_00]: As soon as he locked the door, I fumbled my phone out of my pocket.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan didn't notice anything at first, but as soon as he saw my demeanor shift, a worry settled over him.
[SPEAKER_00]: I unlocked my phone and put a finger to my lips.
[SPEAKER_00]: Look, I whispered.
[SPEAKER_00]: We gotta call for help.
[SPEAKER_00]: There's a dead body in there.
[SPEAKER_00]: What?
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like he didn't register the words.
[SPEAKER_00]: I might as well have spoken a foreign language.
[SPEAKER_00]: It went in one year and out another.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dead body!
[SPEAKER_00]: I repeated.
[SPEAKER_00]: Look, I saved it!
[SPEAKER_00]: I showed him the pictures I took.
[SPEAKER_00]: He scrolled back and forth and scoffed a little.
[SPEAKER_00]: He was laughing, as if I was telling a joke.
[SPEAKER_00]: I realized the light in the pictures wasn't the best, and it didn't help that I was holding the phone from a weird angle.
[SPEAKER_00]: It probably just looked like a garbage bag covered in white sprinkles.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not a joke.
[SPEAKER_00]: I assured him.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's really there.
[SPEAKER_00]: Right under the sink, stuffed in like a- The toilet flushed.
[SPEAKER_00]: I put the phone back in my pocket and looked back up at Dan.
[SPEAKER_00]: His smile had faded a little, but I could see he wasn't understanding.
[SPEAKER_00]: Perhaps in his world, what I was saying was impossible.
[SPEAKER_00]: So before Wallace got back, I leaned back in and whispered.
[SPEAKER_00]: And see for yourself, go back in, check under the sink.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace came back and sat back down.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan gave me another look and headed to the bathroom without a word.
[SPEAKER_00]: For the third time I was alone with Wallace.
[SPEAKER_00]: This time he could tell I was upset.
[SPEAKER_00]: I couldn't hide it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not after talking to Dan like that.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're really not looking well, said Wallace.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe we shouldn't go out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe, I nodded.
[SPEAKER_00]: We'll just see how this plays out.
[SPEAKER_00]: What do you mean?
[SPEAKER_00]: He asked, how what's gonna play out?
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace leaned over the poker table, keeping the cheese knife close to his body.
[SPEAKER_00]: I listened for Dan to react to the body in the bathroom, but there was nothing.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe he was already calling for help while I kept Wallace busy.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, whatever, I said.
[SPEAKER_00]: Whatever happens happens.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace laughed.
[SPEAKER_00]: Mr. I need to know where all the bathrooms are at all times.
[SPEAKER_00]: Want to tell me that whatever happens happens?
[SPEAKER_00]: Now I know you're not all right.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, maybe I'm not.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said throwing up my arms.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe I'm not okay.
[SPEAKER_00]: Is something bothering you?
[SPEAKER_00]: He pressed on.
[SPEAKER_00]: Is it something I did?
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it might be.
[SPEAKER_00]: I nodded.
[SPEAKER_00]: Might be something you did.
[SPEAKER_00]: I've never been the kind of person that confront people out of the blue, especially not people I care about, but I'd had a couple of drinks, and I wasn't feeling like myself anymore.
[SPEAKER_00]: Hell, nothing felt real anymore.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like I'd fallen into some kind of bizarre old world where one of my best friends had turned into a cold-blooded murderer, but there was no mistaking what I'd seen.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan got out of the bathroom, and in the split second where Wallace looked up, I snatched the cheese knife from the plate, leaving the cheddar.
[SPEAKER_00]: There was the harsh noise of metal scraping against ceramic, as I jumped out of my chair, holding the knife as a weapon.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace got up from his chair and stepped away from the table.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan backed away with a quiet.
[SPEAKER_00]: Whoa, whoa, whoa!
[SPEAKER_00]: I pointed a Dan with my free hand.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan, call the police.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said.
[SPEAKER_00]: Call them right now.
[SPEAKER_00]: What are you doing?
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace yelled.
[SPEAKER_00]: Put the damn knife down!
[SPEAKER_00]: So you can take it?
[SPEAKER_00]: I snapped back.
[SPEAKER_00]: You want to put us under the sink too?
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace shook his head as if trying to rattle the confusion out of his mind.
[SPEAKER_00]: He took a deep breath and looked me in the eye.
[SPEAKER_00]: What exactly is the problem here?
[SPEAKER_00]: He asked.
[SPEAKER_00]: The problem is, she got a goddamn body stuffed under the sink!
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace cocked his head, and with a shrug he said, so...
[SPEAKER_00]: out of all the things he could have said.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's the one that surprised me the most.
[SPEAKER_00]: I thought he was going to defend himself or straight up deny it.
[SPEAKER_00]: But no, he didn't seem to mind this at all.
[SPEAKER_00]: I couldn't wrap my head around it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't know what to feel.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan saw it too.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said, I took photos.
[SPEAKER_00]: I showed him.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah?
[SPEAKER_00]: Said Dan.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yep, I saw it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I turned to him.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan was lined up against the wall, holding his hands like he was at gunpoint.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan shot Wallace with an accusatory look.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can't believe you stuff the damn thing under the sink.
[SPEAKER_00]: He said, shaking his head.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's lazy, even for you.
[SPEAKER_00]: My feet felt light, and my head heavy.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like there were so many thoughts pushing into my head that I had trouble keeping my neck straight, like I was being crushed from the top down.
[SPEAKER_00]: A darkness sunk straight through my heart, and settled in my stomach, burning with gastric acid all the way down.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's temporary, said Wallace.
[SPEAKER_00]: Bad timing, haven't that time to move it?
[SPEAKER_00]: You need my truck, Wally.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan asked.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a bitch to clean, you know.
[SPEAKER_00]: Should be good.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wally's shrugged.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just ash and bone.
[SPEAKER_00]: Won't leave a trace.
[SPEAKER_00]: They were talking like I wasn't there.
[SPEAKER_00]: Like I wasn't holding in knife.
[SPEAKER_00]: Did one of them have some kind of hidden weapon?
[SPEAKER_00]: How could they not see me as a threat?
[SPEAKER_00]: I unlocked my phone and dialed the emergency services, but left my hand off the call button.
[SPEAKER_00]: That got their attention Whoa whoa whoa said Dan You serious?
[SPEAKER_00]: What do you think you're doing?
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not letting you turn murder into a fucking choke That's what I'm doing Holy shit.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's blanking said Wallace Ah fuck you're right said Dan He is blanking I held the phone up with my finger on the call button
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't know what to do.
[SPEAKER_00]: I could make sense of what they were saying.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't know what to do, and I was just as ready to start swinging that knife around as I was calling for help.
[SPEAKER_00]: My nerves were a coin toss from fight, flight, or come what may.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're not making any sense?
[SPEAKER_00]: I weased.
[SPEAKER_00]: None of you.
[SPEAKER_00]: While this held up an open hand.
[SPEAKER_00]: Look, I'm sorry, he said.
[SPEAKER_00]: We didn't realize what was going on.
[SPEAKER_00]: His gotta be traumatic.
[SPEAKER_00]: Just put the phone down, said Dan.
[SPEAKER_00]: You can keep the knife.
[SPEAKER_00]: I shook my head.
[SPEAKER_00]: I did nothing.
[SPEAKER_00]: No calling, no cutting, no yelling or screaming.
[SPEAKER_00]: I just observed them and waited for a solution to reveal itself.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace stepped out from behind the poker table.
[SPEAKER_00]: The reality show was still rolling in the background.
[SPEAKER_00]: Two girls with wide accents arguing loudly over a birthday cake.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're celebrating.
[SPEAKER_00]: Said Wallace slowly.
[SPEAKER_00]: You remember that part, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I said.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're going out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Guys not out.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_00]: He continued.
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you know why?
[SPEAKER_00]: I've been having a hard time, I said.
[SPEAKER_00]: You wanted to take me out.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's not a celebration, Dan added.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's just being good people.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is a celebration.
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you remember what we're celebrating?
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, I'll just ask.
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you know that part?
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't.
[SPEAKER_00]: Thinking back on it, there was a bit of a muddled cloud over that part.
[SPEAKER_00]: It had come pretty much from nowhere.
[SPEAKER_00]: The guys had invited me out, and I accepted without a second thought, like we'd done it before, but I couldn't remember when or why.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes when you do things you wouldn't do, we'd blank out.
[SPEAKER_00]: While this added.
[SPEAKER_00]: Happens to a lot of newbies.
[SPEAKER_00]: What the fuck kind of sense is that?
[SPEAKER_00]: I let out a joyless laugh.
[SPEAKER_00]: The knife in my hand shook, and long after the laugh was gone, the shaking remained.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're not you, said Dan from the sidelines.
[SPEAKER_00]: None of us are.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're, you know, we're different.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace nodded.
[SPEAKER_00]: Better.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace pointed to the bathroom, taking a step closer.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's me in there.
[SPEAKER_00]: He said.
[SPEAKER_00]: The real me.
[SPEAKER_00]: But I'm real too.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace took another step forward and extended a hand.
[SPEAKER_00]: Give me something.
[SPEAKER_00]: He said.
[SPEAKER_00]: The phone or the knife or both.
[SPEAKER_00]: But you gotta trust me.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't even understand what you're saying.
[SPEAKER_00]: I said.
[SPEAKER_00]: How the hell am I supposed to trust you?
[SPEAKER_00]: Because you know me, you know Dan.
[SPEAKER_00]: You've known us long, long before we got here.
[SPEAKER_00]: We're the same brood man, brothers.
[SPEAKER_00]: Brood, Dan scoffed, shaking his head.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't like that word.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan, not the time.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, I'll just sit, rolling his eyes.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan held up a hand apologetically and shuffled away from the wall.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace was right in front of me.
[SPEAKER_00]: He slowly placed a hand on the blade of my knife.
[SPEAKER_00]: The valley girls on the TV were laughing now, drama solved, the cake was safe.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can tell you we helped you," said Wallace.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can tell you that you're the youngest, but no matter the words, you can still feel it.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know you can trust us.
[SPEAKER_00]: But I didn't know shit.
[SPEAKER_00]: I had a murderer wrapping his hands around my weapon, and I was hesitating.
[SPEAKER_00]: I couldn't stop that image.
[SPEAKER_00]: That black shirt, those dark jeans, the plop of a fat maggot hitting the ceramic tiles,
[SPEAKER_00]: You want me to show you?
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace asked.
[SPEAKER_00]: You want the truth?
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't.
[SPEAKER_00]: I really didn't.
[SPEAKER_00]: I just wanted to go home and forget that entire night.
[SPEAKER_00]: To go back to the time where we were just gonna go out for drinks, guys night.
[SPEAKER_00]: And yet I released the knife and nodded.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace dropped it on the floor.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I saw it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't want the truth.
[SPEAKER_00]: We went out the back door.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan was in no position to drive, but I saw him lean over a fence and do this strange, hulking movement.
[SPEAKER_00]: After a couple seconds, his stomach rippled, and a transparent glob of jelly rolled out of him like a hairball.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then he was fine, sober even.
[SPEAKER_00]: No slurred speech, no swinging movement.
[SPEAKER_00]: He went and got his pickup truck.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace cleaned up the maggots and wrapped the cabinet in plastic.
[SPEAKER_00]: Once Dan got back, the two of them carried it to the truck and secured it with bright plastic straps.
[SPEAKER_00]: All three of us had to pile in the front seat sitting side by side.
[SPEAKER_00]: Any other night of my life, I wouldn't have given it a second thought.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now it felt like surrender.
[SPEAKER_00]: They played music and talked.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan had to call his work friends until then we weren't coming to the club.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace seemed a bit peaved about it, but there was too much to do, at least that's what it sounded like.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan's position at the bottling plant allowed him access to a warehouse.
[SPEAKER_00]: And with that, he could get to some shipping containers.
[SPEAKER_00]: We rolled past a gate with an armed guard.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan seemed to know him.
[SPEAKER_00]: They waved at each other.
[SPEAKER_00]: Apparently it wasn't that unusual for Dan to drop by unannounced late at night on a weekend.
[SPEAKER_00]: We parked.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace and Dan got the cabinet.
[SPEAKER_00]: As they did, they gave me a tired look.
[SPEAKER_00]: He might as well help," said Wallace.
[SPEAKER_00]: You gonna have us carry this on our own?
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't know what to say.
[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't even know if I was still gonna call for help or not.
[SPEAKER_00]: It felt like a part of my conscience had taken a physical beating, like the decision making part of my brain was swollen.
[SPEAKER_00]: The two of them just stood there waiting for me to lend a hand.
[SPEAKER_00]: They weren't gonna move until I did.
[SPEAKER_00]: So, I helped them.
[SPEAKER_00]: I could feel something frail and dry rolling around in the cabinet as we moved, like bags of old cigars, three guys, and an improvised coffin.
[SPEAKER_00]: Our footsteps echoed against the metal walls.
[SPEAKER_00]: Hollow containers in neutral colors, most of which were rusted or scheduled for destruction.
[SPEAKER_00]: We went to the far end of the building and put down the cabinet.
[SPEAKER_00]: We all took a moment to catch our breaths.
[SPEAKER_00]: The container in front of us was just like all the others, the same neutral color, similar serial numbers, same company logo, a faded blue sunflower print.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then stepped up and clicked the lock open.
[SPEAKER_00]: Then he gave me some space and Wallace tapped me on the shoulder.
[SPEAKER_00]: When you're ready,
[SPEAKER_00]: The container was slightly a jar.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan was using a little flashlight from his keychain, casting my shadow across the door.
[SPEAKER_00]: for a moment I didn't know what to do.
[SPEAKER_00]: I could walk away and never know for sure.
[SPEAKER_00]: Or I could fling those doors wide open.
[SPEAKER_00]: There might be nothing inside, and I'd have two of my friends murder me.
[SPEAKER_00]: Or there would be something inside that I would be unable to understand.
[SPEAKER_00]: But as long as I was out there with my hand on the door, I could be anything.
[SPEAKER_00]: a guy being pranked, a victim, a murderer, as long as that door stayed closed, I was all of it at once, but I had to know which one was real.
[SPEAKER_00]: The doors swung open with a rusty wine.
[SPEAKER_00]: There was a lot of plastic and a lot of chemicals, vacuum sealed bags,
[SPEAKER_00]: A hand on my shoulder urged me forward.
[SPEAKER_00]: Another hand reached ahead, pointing at one of the corners.
[SPEAKER_00]: There.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan said, that's you.
[SPEAKER_00]: And with that, I broke into a thousand screaming pieces.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hadn't just been in a dark place these last few weeks.
[SPEAKER_00]: It had been a real actual space, somewhere dark and fractured, somewhere you are born and dying in the same heartbeat dreaming of life.
[SPEAKER_00]: And somewhere in there, I dreamt of me, a life not my own, but someone else's.
[SPEAKER_00]: But I dreamt it so clearly, so vividly that I wanted it as my own.
[SPEAKER_00]: I remember barking, a hunched skulking behind the trash cans, how I'd practiced standing and talking and walking, changing.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan and Wallace had helped me.
[SPEAKER_00]: I knew them from before.
[SPEAKER_00]: There was a body in that container that looked like me.
[SPEAKER_00]: It had succumbed to my dream and it had been replaced and I'd wanted so bad for that dream to be real that I'd forgotten.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'd blanked.
[SPEAKER_00]: There was a body, and that body was me.
[SPEAKER_00]: Those were my eyes.
[SPEAKER_00]: Unblinking as another fly drank itself fat off my cold skin.
[SPEAKER_00]: You'll get there, buddy.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dan muttered.
[SPEAKER_00]: Take your time.
[SPEAKER_00]: My mind cycled.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was real, but I wasn't real.
[SPEAKER_00]: I had thoughts, but they weren't mine.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'd done all I could to get away from that dark, but it was still there.
[SPEAKER_00]: The more I thought about it, the more I felt it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I stood there on my knees, looking in my broken face lit up by a faint pocket light.
[SPEAKER_00]: My eyes looking back at me from behind a sheet of plastic.
[SPEAKER_00]: But those were never my eyes.
[SPEAKER_00]: In so many ways we were alike, but we weren't the same.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wallace and Dan took me home later that night.
[SPEAKER_00]: They closed the container and locked it back up.
[SPEAKER_00]: We weren't going to use it anymore, and there were no more bodies to hide.
[SPEAKER_00]: The gang was all here, and this ordeal was going to disappear forever.
[SPEAKER_00]: From that night on, there would be nothing and no one that could say I wasn't me.
[SPEAKER_00]: They could run every test on my body.
[SPEAKER_00]: Ask me any question, and check every atom of my being.
[SPEAKER_00]: I am me, but in every other way, I am not.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's such an alien thought to live with.
[SPEAKER_00]: This one thing is such a small part of my life, but it changes everything.
[SPEAKER_00]: I know I'm no different from what I dreamed I'd be, but that doesn't change the fact that it never happened to me.
[SPEAKER_00]: I wasn't the one who graduated high school or got my driver's license.
[SPEAKER_00]: That was another body, one that I dreamed of.
[SPEAKER_00]: And yet, I know all about it, I could point my math teacher out in a crowd, even though I'd never really seen the man with these eyes.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm just a copy.
[SPEAKER_00]: But Dan and Wallace were different.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not only were they my real friends, they were also something more, something other.
[SPEAKER_00]: And even on that level, we are family.
[SPEAKER_00]: I know there are others, but they're not like us.
[SPEAKER_00]: They're not brewed.
[SPEAKER_00]: They want more than to step out of the dark.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's been some time since poker night.
[SPEAKER_00]: The guys originally took me out to celebrate my arrival or crossing the line.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was the last addition to the group, and we'd finished the replacement just a couple of days prior.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'd gone so far into my new life that I completely blanked on what we'd done.
[SPEAKER_00]: I still can't see it clearly.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like smoke in a nightmare.
[SPEAKER_00]: We still play poker sometimes, not to celebrate but just for fun.
[SPEAKER_00]: I still go to work and laugh and joke.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can enjoy a cold beer and watch my favorite show, but there's always that nagging voice in the back of my mind.
[SPEAKER_00]: Am I really enjoying this or am I convincing myself that I like this?
[SPEAKER_00]: Am I laughing because that's what I dreamt I should or because I find something funny.
[SPEAKER_00]: Where does what's real in and I begin?
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know why I'm writing this.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just throwing a message in a bottle into the void of the internet, I suppose.
[SPEAKER_00]: Hell, I haven't even used our real names.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe I'm just lying about all of it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe it's just as much make believe as my whole existence.
[SPEAKER_00]: I suppose if there's something I want you to take with you, it is that looks can deceive.
[SPEAKER_00]: Anything can be taken for granted, and anything can be a lie.
[SPEAKER_00]: The greatest perceptible truth of a human life can turn out to be nothing.
[SPEAKER_00]: So maybe we should just enjoy what we have for as long as we can allow ourselves to have it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Even if it's just poker night with the guys.
[SPEAKER_00]: I guess, as the song goes, life is but a dream.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, that didn't go exactly like I thought it would, and how about that message at the end?
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm just supposed to enjoy life as it comes, even if I'm not the original me.
[SPEAKER_00]: And you know, if you get down to it, deep down.
[SPEAKER_00]: Can you call even your atoms your own?
[SPEAKER_00]: Aren't we just borrowing them?
[SPEAKER_00]: To whom did they belong to before you?
[SPEAKER_00]: That makes my skin crawl.
[SPEAKER_00]: This story reminds me of two other pieces of work.
[SPEAKER_00]: Have you ever seen the matrix?
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you remember that character who decided he would rather choose the illusion of the matrix than the real truth?
[SPEAKER_00]: I know that we're not supposed to support his decision, but can you blame him?
[SPEAKER_00]: What length would you go to in support of truth?
[SPEAKER_00]: The other work is from our dear muse Edgar Allan Poe.
[SPEAKER_00]: His poem, a dream within a dream, paints a vivid existential crisis.
[SPEAKER_00]: Time moves only one way, and sometimes it feels like your past never really existed at all.
[SPEAKER_00]: Allow me to close by sharing this poem with you.
[SPEAKER_00]: Take this kiss upon the brow, and, in parting from you now, thus much let me of thou.
[SPEAKER_00]: You are not wrong, who deem, that my days have been a dream.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yet, if hope has flown away, in a night or in a day, in a vision or in none, is it therefore the less gone?
[SPEAKER_00]: all that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
[SPEAKER_00]: I stand amid the roar of a surf tormented shore, and I hold within my hand grains of the golden sand.
[SPEAKER_00]: How few yet how they creep through my fingers to the deep, while I weep, while I weep.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh God, can I not grasp them with a tighter clasp?
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh God, can I not save one from the pitiless wave?
[SPEAKER_00]: Is all that we see or seem?
[SPEAKER_00]: But a dream within a dream?