[SPEAKER_00]: Hello everyone and welcome back to room for us.
[SPEAKER_00]: A space to work where voice is thrive.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm your host P and every single week.
[SPEAKER_00]: I like to sit down, get vulnerable and talk about all things queer with all of you.
[SPEAKER_00]: I hope you've all had a really, really good week so far.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I guess we're at the end of it now.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's Friday and that you have some exciting things planned for the weekend this week.
[SPEAKER_00]: I want to say it was actually quite productive for me.
[SPEAKER_00]: I've been getting a little bit more motivated throughout each day.
[SPEAKER_00]: to kind of do something that like spark some type of joy so whether it is like moving my body going to the gym, going for a walk, like listening to more music, having more relaxation time, like I've really been trying to prioritize that a lot more like each day.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think I mentioned in a few episodes back, I can't even remember, but I was definitely feeling a bit of the seasonal depression in Vancouver, it's still very, very gloomy, it's quite rainy, but I'm getting used to it now and just trying to find the beauty in it as well.
[SPEAKER_00]: change my mindset around that feeling.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it's totally normal to feel those feelings and be like, this time is really hard.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it's difficult for a lot of people, you know, like the holidays can also be a very emotional time.
[SPEAKER_00]: And what I've been trying to do to make sure I don't go down like a little bit of a dark hole or spiral is
[SPEAKER_00]: Try and just like do the little things that make me happy and honestly music has been so Good for me.
[SPEAKER_00]: I've been Listening to actually a lot of Harry Styles.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was just telling Crystal that I've been getting into like one of his older albums fine line It's so good.
[SPEAKER_00]: I forgot how good all the songs are and that's just been making me happy I saw my Spotify wrapped came out so I listened to like all the songs of 2025 that kind of like made my top and it's
[SPEAKER_00]: really interesting to kind of see what we were listening to over the past year and kind of like reminded of songs as well from the beginning of the year that I was super into remembering why I was also listening to certain tracks especially because I was running so much.
[SPEAKER_00]: There were certain albums I would really get into that would really like boost my serotonin and help me through those longer
[SPEAKER_00]: Those are things I've been doing a lot, watching some movies, Crystal and I watched Sorry Baby last night, it's an A24 film, trigger warning, it's it is sad and it does deal with them, some very, very heavy topics, but they do it in a way with the writing that adds a little bit of like a humor to it.
[SPEAKER_00]: There's a bit of a dark humor and I'm just going to quickly look
[SPEAKER_00]: the actor in it, Eva Victor, directed the film as well, and it was just really, really good.
[SPEAKER_00]: I do highly recommend Sory Baby for anyone who hasn't seen it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Crystal and I really, really liked that one, and we also started heated rivalry, which my friend teen recommended to me, and that is a very steamy steamy show so far.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think there's only even two episodes, and it's available on Crave.
[SPEAKER_00]: but it's a gay TV show, which we love.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's all set in the world of hockey and it features these two star hockey players, these two men who are trying to see each other behind the scenes.
[SPEAKER_00]: And wow, I put it on and I was not expecting it to be as steamy as it was, but I'm going to continue watching because naturally it's a gay TV show.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm very invested.
[SPEAKER_00]: But yeah, I hope all of you have been doing something at least every day that makes you happy and that's kind of
[SPEAKER_00]: kind of leading into like the whole topic of this episode.
[SPEAKER_00]: And as we're approaching the end of 2025, we only have a few more weeks until we enter a whole new year.
[SPEAKER_00]: I kind of wanted to talk about why I think it's good to be a little delusional.
[SPEAKER_00]: And meaning like you should expand your
[SPEAKER_00]: what you really, really want.
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's so funny that the timing of this episode that I wanted to record, literally, I saw a We The Urban Post just posted where I was like, this is exactly what I wanted to talk about for the episode.
[SPEAKER_00]: And basically,
[SPEAKER_00]: What we that urban was saying is that we spent most of 2025 in a survival mode.
[SPEAKER_00]: So let 2026 be your year in revival mode and it's possible to thrive while still getting where you're meant to be and they have a whole carousel.
[SPEAKER_00]: It says we don't talk enough about the life you imagined but never lived.
[SPEAKER_00]: May 2026 reward the courage.
[SPEAKER_00]: It takes to imagine and try again.
[SPEAKER_00]: and I was feeling that so heavy.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was like, personally for me, I feel like I've been playing it safe in a lot of ways.
[SPEAKER_00]: And what I mean by that is I go towards what feels very comfortable, what feels very stable.
[SPEAKER_00]: And sometimes I put some things like on the back burner a little bit, like a lot of my creative expressions and my passions because
[SPEAKER_00]: I will feel myself starting to get burnt out because I'm putting other things on priority when those aren't necessarily my passions, but I see it as something like stable for me.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I find myself getting into a bit of a mundane routine with it being like, but this is not like making me very happy.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I tend to feel that way in sometimes a lot of like the work that I do.
[SPEAKER_00]: And while I do enjoy certain aspects of it, it's like
[SPEAKER_00]: sometimes like I've noticed this like throughout my 20s and everything as well like I would kind of just go for what I have like the skills in, but I didn't think it was like something I was working on that was like truly, truly feeding my soul and I want 2026 to be a year of change in that for me and I want to focus on
[SPEAKER_00]: What do I really love?
[SPEAKER_00]: What is something that like fires me up?
[SPEAKER_00]: And part of my human design, as a manifesting generator, is that I need something in my life that I'm like doing pretty much to like get me excited.
[SPEAKER_00]: I need to be like fired up about it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Otherwise, it's not really complimenting like my design.
[SPEAKER_00]: And when I had my human design read,
[SPEAKER_00]: by my very, very close friend Kayla who was on the podcast.
[SPEAKER_00]: When Kayla explained that to me, I was like, that is something I relate to.
[SPEAKER_00]: So, so hard core, so
[SPEAKER_00]: I wanted to say like it's okay if you have a goal and even if it seems like a huge huge goal, like maybe something that feels like a little unattainable, that's okay, like be a little delusional in it, like believe in yourself, because I think when your goals are just strictly limited to what's just realistic, you might never push past.
[SPEAKER_00]: the status quo.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I think when you're dreaming big, because if that's something you really, really want to do, it actually allows your brain to imagine outcomes that seem impossible at first, but then I can help you like expand to a sense of what could actually happen.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I think that's like the first step in making like big dreams of reality.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I feel like you hear that with
[SPEAKER_00]: A lot of successful people, like in whatever craft do they end up pursuing, they believe in themselves, that they do it, and that's like the power of your thoughts.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's also like the power of manifestation, just like that true true belief in yourself.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think that when you...
[SPEAKER_00]: Dream, big, and you want this life for yourself, dopamine does get released where you like can envision it, and you see it, and it can make you feel really energized, creative, and resilient.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think when you're always going to play it safe or stable,
[SPEAKER_00]: You don't really like create that same feeling I personally think in your brain.
[SPEAKER_00]: And just an example of this is like, sometimes I'll get big spurts of motivation or I'll do something that makes me really happy.
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's something that pushes me outside my comfort zone and I get into such a creative space and I feel motivated.
[SPEAKER_00]: Like I can feel the energy shift throughout my day.
[SPEAKER_00]: Even if it was something so simple, like working towards a dream,
[SPEAKER_00]: but I'm like going out and doing it and I'm like in a creative space.
[SPEAKER_00]: So if I'm at a coffee shop and I'm like in my own world, working out a video or doing some editing, I feel like that makes me so so happy.
[SPEAKER_00]: When you're also a little delusional, you're
[SPEAKER_00]: more likely to take those risks.
[SPEAKER_00]: You'll take like the unconventional steps that like maybe you wouldn't otherwise.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I also think when you start to accept that like you might not always succeed in everything, you at least try it.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you don't try, you'll never never know.
[SPEAKER_00]: Stop trying to like
[SPEAKER_00]: which challenge all of you, put it on your vision board, have a vision board night, put down everything, you're hoping to change in the new year.
[SPEAKER_00]: What are certain things like maybe that happened this year or that you're pursuing that you're like, this is just not it for me anymore and it could be anything.
[SPEAKER_00]: It doesn't have to just be like a career or anything like that.
[SPEAKER_00]: Just think about something that's maybe keeping you just safe and
[SPEAKER_00]: and start to think like really, really highly of yourself of wanting more when we get into this place of like, we're just settling.
[SPEAKER_00]: I actually feel like it costs.
[SPEAKER_00]: more like of your soul.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like sucking the life out of you.
[SPEAKER_00]: We don't realize how much we're doing that because of how much time, you know, like time takes up so much of your day in terms of like what you spend it doing, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: And that could be with anything that could be with career, that could be with romantic relationships, like platonic friendships, like even certain family members.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it's just really, really important to really pay attention to what what your soul needs.
[SPEAKER_00]: In a way, the more delusional you are, like, big dreamer you are, I think it can actually really attract more opportunities and people.
[SPEAKER_00]: I do think that people are really drawn to confidence and vision and you might actually find yourself in a space where others, like, really motivate you and you could make, like, friends out of it too and they always say it's really important to be in a circle where
[SPEAKER_00]: encourages you to go for the things you want and maybe they're a dream for themselves and like you feel inspired by like what they do for themselves.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it's really important who you surround yourself with.
[SPEAKER_00]: That also kind of gets into, as we're trying to get, trying to be a little more delusional next year and just dream big and like just go for it, take those risks.
[SPEAKER_00]: I also wanted to talk about how in Chinese zodiac years were actually leaving the year of the snake and we're entering the year of the horse.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I think this is very, very important because I think a lot of people can relate to 2025 was a very, very interesting year.
[SPEAKER_00]: And when I realized it was the year of the snake, I was like, this really, really tracks.
[SPEAKER_00]: When I was doing some research, I found out that the year of the snake is associated with wisdom, introspection, and a lot of careful planning.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's very subtle, there's strategy, sometimes there's secrecy.
[SPEAKER_00]: There's also
[SPEAKER_00]: lots of transformation, rebirth, deep reflection, patience, caution, and self-awareness.
[SPEAKER_00]: So when you're leaving the year of the snake, that often symbolizes a period where you've been thinking very, very deeply.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're planning your next moves or focusing on personal growth and strategy.
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's a very reflective, but also like a slow moving energy where precision and thoughtfulness
[SPEAKER_00]: are rewarded.
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's truly the year felt like a snake.
[SPEAKER_00]: As we're entering the year of the horse, that actually symbolizes a beginning.
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's freedom, movement, energy.
[SPEAKER_00]: There's adventure action taking risks.
[SPEAKER_00]: Social ability enthusiasm, independence, speed, decisiveness, and chasing opportunities.
[SPEAKER_00]: So entering the year of the horse in 2026, signals a shift from the snake's slow introspective energy to a more dynamic outward moving energy.
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's a year that encourages action, pursuing your goals, and embracing change.
[SPEAKER_00]: Where the snake plans and strategizes, the horse gallops forward
[SPEAKER_00]: So, in a more symbolic transition, it kind of looks like this, so we're going from inner focus to outer action, from careful calculation to bold moves, and from slow transformation to accelerated progress, from cautious patience to more of an energetic pursuit of freedom and opportunities.
[SPEAKER_00]: So, it's like you've been in a planning and prep mode,
[SPEAKER_00]: Right now, but now the universe is actually encouraging you to run towards those goals.
[SPEAKER_00]: And that's why I was like, I wonder why I'm feeling it so deeply.
[SPEAKER_00]: This year has felt like a very quiet and reflective year for me, and it's been a bit slow moving in a way.
[SPEAKER_00]: But now I'm feeling this intense drive to just like really go for what I want.
[SPEAKER_00]: I also think when it comes to 2025 and these transitions, I was also thinking about how I think many people can relate to this and how they're like going through changes in their friendships or their personal connections.
[SPEAKER_00]: And this is like the snake energy of the year ending.
[SPEAKER_00]: So,
[SPEAKER_00]: Because we're very reflective and discerning, this is a year where you may have naturally evaluated your relationships.
[SPEAKER_00]: You might have realized which friendships no longer align with your values or your emotional needs, and it could almost feel like a shedding of old connections.
[SPEAKER_00]: Literally how a snake sheds its skin.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's about like clearing that space for very authentic and energizing bonds.
[SPEAKER_00]: And with the horse energy, this brings in like a lot of social ability, but also that desire for freedom.
[SPEAKER_00]: And you might really attract people when you're going towards those goals that really align with you.
[SPEAKER_00]: And as I mentioned a bit earlier, like when you
[SPEAKER_00]: are so like thoughtful in what you want.
[SPEAKER_00]: Your thoughts are so powerful.
[SPEAKER_00]: Like when you think about things or you see them out loud in a way like manifestation.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're more likely to attract people who are kind of on that same wavelength as you.
[SPEAKER_00]: And so they might be adventurous, they might be also on the same creative pursuit as you, and it could be very, very uplifting to be around.
[SPEAKER_00]: So 2026 is the year to actively pursue relationships that energize you, rather than the ones you've been holding on to for many years, but they're feeling draining or stagnant.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you've been feeling like that energy, like that low energy for some reason, like if any of you can relate to that,
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like for a reason and it's this year like literally telling you your stagnant right now or you've been stuck in old energy and it is time to shed that energy so you can allow something new and like beautiful connections to come in.
[SPEAKER_00]: Shading some old friendships in the sneakier is actually perfectly aligned with preparing for the horse here because you're kind of getting rid of the old.
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's not to say that's easy.
[SPEAKER_00]: It never feels easy.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not like I always the most comfortable feeling to do that.
[SPEAKER_00]: But sometimes I also think it's like necessary for a new growth if you're kind of leaving behind energies that just like no longer seem to align with you anymore.
[SPEAKER_00]: And
[SPEAKER_00]: the year of the horse encourages stepping into circles where your energy will flow naturally and you're freedom and like that most of all, like you, you as a person, like you're respected because I think like also self-respect is probably one of the highest forms of love you can give yourself and sometimes
[SPEAKER_00]: when you're kind of going through that ending and you're going through a huge transition period that maybe you never pictured you would be doing because it's tough and it's not something we really want to do, but it's necessary.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I think that is kind of that horse energy because you're going to be strong.
[SPEAKER_00]: You love yourself and your self-love is so so high and your self-respect is so so high that you will never
[SPEAKER_00]: Deal with any energy that's funny.
[SPEAKER_00]: Again, like you won't do it, you've tolerated enough.
[SPEAKER_00]: And now it's like, okay, I'm on to newness right now.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I think that's really, really important.
[SPEAKER_00]: When it comes to like also career and personal growth, the snake year you're going to be planning, you're strategizing, you're quietly working on skills or long-term projects.
[SPEAKER_00]: but then in the new year, you're taking those bold steps and you're going to be networking, meeting new people, seizing opportunities, showing your ideas, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: And I think that's the year to do it.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you've been thinking about something and you're kind of like quietly doing it behind the scenes, don't be afraid to take a chance in the new year.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe launch your work, present it, offer something you really want, apply for the career you want, keep networking,
[SPEAKER_00]: A really, really important thing to do when the energy is the year of the horse because it's the year to do it.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's literally the year that encourages like more of those social interactions.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think many of us are going to be feeling these transitions as we are getting towards the end of the year.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I know it can feel uncomfortable, like there are times when I'm like, yes, something in the energy been a little off, especially when it comes towards the end.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I can't tell if it's like, there's a sense of nostalgia there.
[SPEAKER_00]: There's like old feelings of things you've known forever and it's uncomfortable, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: Not everyone loves change, but I also think that change is really necessary.
[SPEAKER_00]: There are some personal things that I had realized when I was doing some reflection that I had been going through for actually many years that like I don't think I ever faced directly and it actually had to do with some like long-term friendships and
[SPEAKER_00]: I realized that there were a lot of things that just like we're happening behind the scenes that like weren't right.
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's a really tough decision because I am someone who's very, very easy going.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm someone who likes to keep the piece, but in turn with that, I actually found like I was losing myself respect because I would know something felt off.
[SPEAKER_00]: but I would continue to be in these energies.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm realizing we might all be going in different directions.
[SPEAKER_00]: It doesn't mean you don't have love for those friendships, but sometimes like it's okay to be going on different paths.
[SPEAKER_00]: Like you might not be going on that same path together, even though maybe at one point you maybe thought you would.
[SPEAKER_00]: But I'm not someone who feels like there needs to be even a huge confrontation about it.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just a quiet transition away and you'll start to notice like maybe you do start to feel a bit lighter as sad as it can be.
[SPEAKER_00]: But it's because you know deep down like this is a transition period and I'm listening to myself and I've changed also like
[SPEAKER_00]: a lot over the years, just in terms of like letting go of some people pleasing tendencies becoming a lot stronger and more self-assured and not relying on a lot of people for like my happiness.
[SPEAKER_00]: I've been like working so much to like on myself and being like very independent and when I
[SPEAKER_00]: moved to a new city.
[SPEAKER_00]: I just think I was really challenged in that aspect because I wasn't around all the familiar energy that I'd known for many many years.
[SPEAKER_00]: So as I was doing so much reflecting on past friendships and old energies, like I said, as tough as it can be, sometimes it's almost necessary because I think when you do that reflection and you make those changes, you you're doing it because you're looking out for you.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I really do think that the universe
[SPEAKER_00]: sees that and it opens up new doors for you so whether you're going through that with like old energy and your old connections, your friendships, a relationship, career, whatever it is, I think there's something really, really important about shedding energy that just doesn't fit anymore.
[SPEAKER_00]: My advice overall is to embrace change and know that it's so, so normal to outgrow people, it's so normal to outgrow situations and doing so actually clear space for authentic connections.
[SPEAKER_00]: Once again, it does not have to be something so dramatic, there's like,
[SPEAKER_00]: No hatefulness towards anybody, it doesn't have to be that way.
[SPEAKER_00]: You wish people well, genuinely, but outgrowing things and people, situations, it's all completely fine.
[SPEAKER_00]: I know it definitely can feel uncomfortable, but it's all part of the process.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think...
[SPEAKER_00]: for this transition, make sure you don't just think about your personal goals like really, really take action and you don't have to wait for something to feel perfect in order to do it.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think that or synergy like really,
[SPEAKER_00]: favors those like bold bold moves because when you think about it like a horse is also like such a powerful animal that like takes action and they're fast you know so it's like channel that and be like I'm just gonna go take action and see what happens but most importantly I would say just trust your gut I am really really excited to see how we're all going to be doing in 2026 I know we still have
[SPEAKER_00]: really like think about what you want for the next year in December.
[SPEAKER_00]: Take this month to look into your goals and clear out your mind, make sure you keep the piece like just with yourself.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it's okay to even prioritize quieter months or like a quieter season.
[SPEAKER_00]: Listen to like what truly makes your soul happy and
[SPEAKER_00]: I think that's what I'm going to be doing.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's interesting to see like how when you change your mindset a little bit.
[SPEAKER_00]: You'll start to feel a little bit better because I was feeling like pretty low.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would say like a couple weeks ago and I was struggling a lot with the rain.
[SPEAKER_00]: Every single day I was struggling.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was like this is so bad.
[SPEAKER_00]: Like I don't even know.
[SPEAKER_00]: how I didn't like and kept through it.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was pretty brutal.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not going to lie.
[SPEAKER_00]: But as the days go on and I still see, like, hey, it's still rainy season, you start to change your mindset when you kind of romanticize things in a way.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I don't mean it needs to be like a toxic positivity kind of mindset, but instead of just, you know, looking outside, seeing it's raining and instead of just like hermiting inside the apartment because I'm not motivated
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes it's something as simple as taking a shower, doing my makeup, getting ready for the day, and going outside for a walk, bringing an umbrella, go get a coffee, enjoy, and at least you stepped outside, you got some fresh air, and every time I do something like that, I do start to feel a little bit better.
[SPEAKER_00]: Even if it's like a few minutes every day, making that effort to just go and do something that brings you joy has been so helpful for me.
[SPEAKER_00]: So I think I'm going to take
[SPEAKER_00]: And as I go into next year, I'm going to keep trying things like that, and I'm going to keep pushing myself to stay creative.
[SPEAKER_00]: And don't lose sight of the things that really, really make me happy, because maybe I need a bit more stability right now, especially when it comes to income.
[SPEAKER_00]: But I think when I also focus on my creative passions, that's like the life I envision, you know, like that's something I really, really want.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's all do it together.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would challenge you all to think about it and think about like what is it that I really really want?
[SPEAKER_00]: And how can we put that into action for 2026?
[SPEAKER_00]: If anyone wants to talk about it, I'm always all ears for it.
[SPEAKER_00]: My DMs are open.
[SPEAKER_00]: I love to hear what people are thinking about.
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe it's something new.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like a dream they want to pursue.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm all ears.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would love to know.
[SPEAKER_00]: I do hope that you have a good rest of the day or the night, and thank you so much for tuning in to this podcast episode and just hearing my thoughts as we're getting towards 26.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm really excited.
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm very excited to see what the year of the horse has in store for all of us.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it's going to be good.
[SPEAKER_00]: 2025 definitely had its ups and downs.
[SPEAKER_00]: And as I mentioned, there was probably a lot of changes that also may have happened for you too, but just remember that it's important to go through those transitions.
[SPEAKER_00]: We, we almost need them.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's very essential.
[SPEAKER_00]: But I will see you all next week.
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you again so much for tuning in.