WEBVTT

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[SPEAKER_03]: You're listening to the intentional parents' podcasts brought to you by intentional.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Intentional is all about spiritual formation in the family.

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[SPEAKER_03]: We desire to bring biblical hope and practical hope.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Enjoy this week's conversation.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Welcome back to the intentional parents' podcasts.

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[SPEAKER_03]: reflection and projection.

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[SPEAKER_03]: We are going to talk about 2025 and 2026 looking back on some beautiful moments, but also the importance of reflection and the importance of projection through a biblical lens and why it matters for your life, for your family, for your spiritual formation.

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[SPEAKER_03]: and how to do some of those things.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So this is also a serial and practical.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And want to say thank you to everyone who's taking a moment to write and subscribe in this new year.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Could you make a commitment to try?

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[SPEAKER_03]: Just do it.

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[SPEAKER_03]: If you haven't done it, write, subscribe, leave a comment that's huge YouTube community.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Thank you for doing that over there.

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[SPEAKER_03]: But we're again releasing exclusive content over there.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So please feel free to go to our YouTube channel.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And for example, we released a really great conversation you and John Markad at the mother of a treat, only there, so go check that out, you can watch the whole thing.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Another thing is, man, we have some fun stuff to reflect on for, for 2020, 25, it was a pretty full year, I turned to 40 just a few weeks ago.

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[SPEAKER_03]: It's happened.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I'm there.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I'm now in your Asian stays and finally made it.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Finally caught up took care of it.

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[SPEAKER_02]: Forty or a whole four months longer than you.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, but it felt like a long time.

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[SPEAKER_03]: It felt like you were pretty old for a couple months and I am happy to now be in that category.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Um, but yeah, man, that was a just what a great gift to have great friends to, to celebrate with.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And then, um, man, there's, there's been a lot that's happened in 2025, especially in our family, but also with intentional.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Um, I think about sewing ahead and seed, we, that was our first time to release a prayer devotional.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And man, uh, that, that has been so much more, um,

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[SPEAKER_03]: impactful than I could have imagined and we actually we've already ran out of our first or our first thousands of orders and now we're we have a whole new batch come in but it reminds me of what we are going to be doing actually with reclaim well so you'll be hearing this this will come out on December 31 so as you're hearing this starting tomorrow so even if this is timestamped and it's passed December 31st you can join this challenge anytime but we're going to be partnering with

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[SPEAKER_03]: to actually do a 31-day prayer challenge for your kids.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So it's basically on the app.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And the idea is that you download the app and then start the challenge in each day just a reminder to set down your phone for two or three minutes up to five or fifteen.

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[SPEAKER_03]: However long you want really.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And log the hours of being off your phone, but while you're doing that prayer for your kids, we're gonna actually use, so I can see if you wanna use that as what you do during that time.

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[SPEAKER_03]: But I wanna tell all of our people right here.

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[SPEAKER_03]: One cool thing that we did was we actually wrote five new days around digital redemption that's only going to be released on that app.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So,

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[SPEAKER_02]: And I've read them.

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[SPEAKER_02]: They're so good.

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[SPEAKER_02]: So good.

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[SPEAKER_03]: That's very kind.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Um, but why that's important is because there's there's there's content over there for you to actually check it out.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And this is a free thing.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So all you have to do is simply go to reclaim well it's it the link will be in the show notes to free app download the app join the January challenge.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I've actually think.

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[SPEAKER_03]: on in January, our challenge is going on and then J.P. Picluda, if you've ever heard of this guy, great human, he's doing a gratitude challenge.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So join both of those challenges.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I'm reclaimed well for the month of January.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And honestly, you will not regret it.

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[SPEAKER_03]: It's a reminder to pray for your kids.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And again, if you have the book, great use it.

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[SPEAKER_03]: You can get it if you don't have it.

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[SPEAKER_03]: But there's also five new days that we don't have anywhere else around digital redemption for your

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[SPEAKER_03]: But honey, I'd be curious, you know, before we get into this idea of reflection and projection, which is so important.

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[SPEAKER_03]: What are some highlights of 25 for you?

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[SPEAKER_03]: And I didn't prep you for this question.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So you might be a little caught off guard, but give me some things that you can reflect upon, some things that, and I'm actually saying, what are you grateful for?

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[SPEAKER_03]: Because I think we have a good, long list of things that we're hard.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I think you and I have a good read on what's hard, which I do want to talk about.

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[SPEAKER_03]: But I'm thinking like, what are some things that stick out to you, life, intentional, all the above?

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[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I mean, I feel like on a family front, it's been, uh, I don't know, it feels like this year.

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[SPEAKER_02]: our whole family is in a different season like, um, and I say that because of how our kids are spread, oftentimes it's felt like they're in two very different seasons, like our kids are and they are, but it feels like everybody is feeling much older, like Duke this year turned 16, got a license.

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[SPEAKER_03]: a bought a car has a job has a girlfriend like just a whole new stage of life and you got to hear you just I mean you just heard from Duke and Scarlett black squeak on the podcast you got a little window into their life and world yeah that was that was wild and a high risk I was like him maybe a little nervous I was a very thankful for that in twenty twenty five that was really fun yeah

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[SPEAKER_02]: But I feel like with him specifically, we've entered a whole new stage and it's like I keep thinking of all the times I heard people say when our kids were little everywhere you go.

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[SPEAKER_02]: You get stopped in the grocery store, enjoy it, it goes so fast and I felt like the little years were so slow and now I feel like I understand what they meant.

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[SPEAKER_02]: I feel like the teenage years are flying by.

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[SPEAKER_02]: So I feel like that's been really fun to just end challenging.

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[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, it's been

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[SPEAKER_02]: I've been surprised by how fast parenting has to shift as your kids get older, and that's happening when your kids are young, but in a different way that you have a little more control over or seeming control.

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[SPEAKER_02]: So I feel like it's been challenging, but it's also been really rewarding and fun to watch.

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[SPEAKER_02]: And then I would say the same with our younger two.

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[SPEAKER_02]: It just feels like, you know, everybody's in a different stage now than the high physical needs stage.

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[SPEAKER_02]: Um, so I feel like it's been fun to see our family grow and get older, like, which I love.

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[SPEAKER_02]: To me, that's not sad.

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[SPEAKER_02]: That's fun and exciting.

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[SPEAKER_03]: What about intentional stuff?

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[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

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[SPEAKER_02]: Um.

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[SPEAKER_03]: For you, this is completely selfish.

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[SPEAKER_03]: You get what was some of your favorite things?

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[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, motherhood retreat is always a highlight for me.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And the fact that we're doing another one in April in Nashville, so please take it to our available still.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Actually, if you're listening today, this is the last day of early bird.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So check that out.

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[SPEAKER_02]: There you go.

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[SPEAKER_02]: Um, yeah, that's always a huge highlight for me, not just the event itself, although it is an, and getting to interview John Marck, having him there.

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[SPEAKER_02]: Who?

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[SPEAKER_02]: Um, I'm just keeping it.

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[SPEAKER_03]: You know, this is literally a, this is new thing.

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[SPEAKER_03]: The right, it's been so fun to do this every time his name comes out.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Who's this pertinent?

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[SPEAKER_03]: I love it.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Anyway, keep going.

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[SPEAKER_02]: But that was fun.

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[SPEAKER_02]: We've never done anything like that together.

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[SPEAKER_02]: So there's so much beautiful stuff that happened at the event, but honestly, it's the stories afterwards.

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[SPEAKER_02]: Then are just...

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[SPEAKER_02]: feel like such an honor to get to be a part of.

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[SPEAKER_02]: And so that I would say the marriage retreats that we did was that was this past year, right?

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[SPEAKER_02]: She was like the lifetime ago.

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[SPEAKER_02]: Her life, yeah, it's been so special.

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[SPEAKER_02]: I think the one thing that is hard for me about the motherhood retreat because it's a large event is that you can't talk to everybody, you can't deep dive conversation with very many people.

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[SPEAKER_02]: Where is the marriage retreat felt like a more immersive experience where you're really getting to hear people's stories?

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[SPEAKER_02]: And so loved that.

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[SPEAKER_02]: And then I think just, honestly, again, hearing the stories of what God is doing and how he's using, you know, not to be hyper Christian language.

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[SPEAKER_02]: But our loaves and fishes, like we are blown away on a daily basis of like,

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[SPEAKER_02]: got to can't believe what you're doing and clearly your spirit wanted to do something and you just happened to decide to use some of us to start that conversation but just to see the really real honest

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[SPEAKER_02]: conversation and desire that is happening among families right now to have a front row seat to that just feels like such an honor and a privilege and so when I get out of the weeds in the overwhelm of my day-to-day because I do feel like it's been a very overwhelming year practically just of all the different things going on.

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[SPEAKER_02]: It is I find myself just filled with gratitude.

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[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I'd have to say something that's been most surprising and also just really fun that actually we didn't even last year at this time fully know if we would even do it was intentional fatherhood.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I mean, we didn't even record the first season yet this time last year.

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[SPEAKER_03]: It was February.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.

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[SPEAKER_03]: and could not be more surprised and blessed and encouraged by that and partnering with our buddy Justin and my friend and just been great.

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[SPEAKER_03]: It's been such an incredible honor to speak to men in such a specific way and to think the full circle of like we did our first recording of the podcast in February and track one year later it's almost double to the month.

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[SPEAKER_03]: or doing our first live event in Costa Mesa.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I mean, just that is staggering because that is just that's Jesus' stuff and moving and the stories we hear and the countless like amazing questions and the curiosity, the the cell groups that we keep finding that are like listening to the podcast and going through the content and I mean, you guys know you are.

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[SPEAKER_03]: It's literally just

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[SPEAKER_03]: outstanding and overwhelming and humbling and so I know Justin and I have been just so honored to share our stories and I got the highest praise the other day and I say it's the highest praise because those who know you best don't often respect you most although that's the goal.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Um, that's not they see you're everything and I was talking to Steve or other long.

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[SPEAKER_03]: He's like, I just finished listening to every word of both seasons.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And I was like, dude, I don't care what happens from this point on.

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[SPEAKER_03]: This is that to me is success.

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[SPEAKER_03]: The fact that somebody that knows me, intimately, knows my life, knows my words, and would still listen is the most encouraging praise.

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[SPEAKER_03]: But he's just one example of so many that have just been an encouragement.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, I mean, between that, the marriage content, the motherhood, the fatherhood, that is not only what we're reflecting upon.

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[SPEAKER_03]: That's, that's organizational reflection.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And that's not what we're going to talk about today.

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[SPEAKER_03]: But we also have a lot of future projection and stuff that we're really excited about for 26 and honestly, friends, we have some very exciting things coming for 26, which includes all of you listening.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So we're not going to talk about that here right in this moment, but I just want to write your appetite for listening in because we have some fun things.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Um, but, you know, to start this combo, these two words actually came to me when I was prepping for our Christmas party for our staff, our intentional, and this two words, I woke up in the middle of the night literally, and there's two words, there's a reflection in projection, and I was like, I don't, that sounds weird, and was projecting, it's projection like a, like I want to project what I want to be in 26 or whatever, but,

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[SPEAKER_03]: No, it was like literally these are two very foundational important things that if we missed them, it really throws us off.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And as we were talking about having a conversation around the new year, this is what stood out is like, there is such an important, some reflection remembering which we're going to talk about.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And there's so many biblical reminders of that.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And there's a lot of real good meat here that I want to talk about.

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[SPEAKER_03]: But also projection, which is also having faith for 26, and obviously we have no idea what's about to happen, but 25 is almost behind us.

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[SPEAKER_03]: 26 is we're in it now.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And when we're in that new year, it usually tempts us to rush forward to set a lot of goals.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Many of you are right now going, I'm going to reinvent myself.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Like 26 is the year where I'm getting the body I've always wanted.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I am going to work out.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I'm going to take every amount of semi-glutat.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I can't give me a bottle of it.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And I'm going to go hard, and I'm going to just reshape myself physically or somewhere like this year.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I'm going to make money or this year, I'm going to finally have time for my marriage or my kids.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And these things are not bad, but I think scripture invites us into something deeper.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And yes, goal set do it.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Like we have goals, right?

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[SPEAKER_03]: But we also,

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[SPEAKER_03]: That is just the very tip of the iceberg and faith really at the turn of the year even as we're starting.

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[SPEAKER_03]: It's not about pressure or performance.

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[SPEAKER_03]: It's about formation.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So I just really want to encourage you to think not about the goals that you could set up who you could become, but really who could you be formed into this year?

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[SPEAKER_03]: Who could you become, and how could you become more like Jesus in a deep way?

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[SPEAKER_03]: And so,

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[SPEAKER_03]: I just want to reflect on those reflection and projection, and there's two different directions we're going to talk about, and it's pretty straightforward, but two verses that are just very helpful, and we're not going to go deep in them, but I think they're foundational for those of you that are like, I want to go deeper, I want to understand.

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[SPEAKER_03]: He was 11, I think is one of my favorites, but he was 11 one, now faith is a confidence of what we hope for and an assurance about what we do not see.

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[SPEAKER_03]: When we talk about projection, which we'll talk about in a minute, it is about having faith.

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[SPEAKER_03]: You have hopes for things you can't see that are intangible, that maybe you can think about and dream about, but they're not there yet in reality.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And that's that inner work of faith.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And that's important.

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[SPEAKER_03]: But we have to remember,

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[SPEAKER_03]: that confidence grows when we remember reflect about what God's already done.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So our faith becomes exponentially more real when we were, when we looked at him go, well, he did do that.

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[SPEAKER_03]: He did do that.

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[SPEAKER_03]: He did do that.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So Hebrews 111 and then the next one's easy to remember Luke 181.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up.

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[SPEAKER_03]: faith shows up as perseverance and persistence, staying continuing to ask.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And so those are the things we're going to kind of highlight.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So I want to talk about reflection.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I want to talk about really briefly and we'll get into this.

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[SPEAKER_03]: But reflection is so important.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I'm a synclid need to, I can't remember saying, I'm a synclid need to, I'm saying that last name wrong.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So if you're like, let me check, that's the wrong pronunciation.

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[SPEAKER_03]: But this quote, in the furnace of gratitude,

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[SPEAKER_03]: The soul is refined.

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[SPEAKER_03]: That's why I'm so thankful that honestly kind of funny that even with reclaim well the challenge we're doing is both prayer or our families and futures, but it's also gratitude.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And I love those two different ones that we're doing.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And when we reflected it integrates experience that we've had and so.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Hebrews 11 when we talk about launching forward.

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[SPEAKER_03]: This is where we're going to land.

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[SPEAKER_03]: It assumes memory.

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[SPEAKER_03]: We don't start twenty twenty six from zero.

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[SPEAKER_03]: We started from a story.

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[SPEAKER_03]: You started from the story you've been living ten years from now.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Last year especially.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And so I want to talk about why reflection is not optional.

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[SPEAKER_03]: It's not a suggestion, but why don't you start us on some of that honey?

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[SPEAKER_02]: Well, I want to read two lines that you wrote or that we're in your notes that you skipped, that I feel like is just really powerful as we kind of finish framing this.

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[SPEAKER_02]: You put reflection as how we learn to tell the truth about our lives with God.

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[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

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[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, just two on that for a second.

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[SPEAKER_02]: How often does the enemy or our own inner scripts and narratives not tell the full truth about God?

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[SPEAKER_02]: So reflection is how we learn to tell the truth about our lives with God.

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[SPEAKER_02]: Projection is how we learn to trust God with the truth we've just named.

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[SPEAKER_02]: just think like that's I just think that's really really beautiful.

16:23.220 --> 16:29.273
[SPEAKER_02]: But with the reflection and I feel like this comes a little more naturally to me than the projection does.

16:29.353 --> 16:38.494
[SPEAKER_02]: I feel like you're going to have I feel like you truly like have the gift of faith and I have the gift of pessimism.

16:38.474 --> 16:59.166
[SPEAKER_02]: So I feel like you could have a lot of my projection, but I feel like reflection maybe in light of suffering has become really helpful to me and something that I actually do quite often because because I found it so helpful to my soul, but

16:59.146 --> 17:04.996
[SPEAKER_02]: You know, when you read the scriptures, there's two commands that are said over and over again.

17:05.016 --> 17:07.379
[SPEAKER_02]: One is do not fear, which you don't have time to get into.

17:07.420 --> 17:14.571
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm actually going to deep dive study it and hopefully talk about it at the next motherhood retreat, because I want to understand it more and we all carry it.

17:15.152 --> 17:17.396
[SPEAKER_02]: I want to understand what the Bible says about it, all that.

17:17.636 --> 17:18.758
[SPEAKER_02]: You don't have time to do that today.

17:18.738 --> 17:23.502
[SPEAKER_02]: But the other is to remember, and it's actually not a suggestion.

17:23.542 --> 17:25.084
[SPEAKER_02]: It's a good idea to remember.

17:25.244 --> 17:33.191
[SPEAKER_02]: It's actually a command that said over and over again, hundreds of times in the Old Testament doesn't more in the New Testament.

17:33.211 --> 17:40.537
[SPEAKER_02]: And the point of that, like why we're even highlighting that, is that it actually has some weight to it.

17:40.877 --> 17:48.424
[SPEAKER_02]: Like it is not just a good idea that the Bible mentions here and there.

17:48.404 --> 18:01.765
[SPEAKER_02]: And it doesn't mean just this mental recall when you dive into like the Hebrew and the Greek meanings which I would butcher how they're pronounced and I'm not a Greek or Hebrew scholar although I wish I would sometimes.

18:03.247 --> 18:16.167
[SPEAKER_02]: But it means this like active embodied faithful practice that we're doing often and you

18:16.147 --> 18:18.512
[SPEAKER_02]: when the scripture say, remember the Sabbath.

18:18.672 --> 18:22.279
[SPEAKER_02]: It doesn't mean just like contemplate the Sabbath and think about it.

18:22.860 --> 18:28.050
[SPEAKER_02]: It's like, no, remember to do this thing I've commanded you to do because it's for your good.

18:28.070 --> 18:34.543
[SPEAKER_02]: And I think that there's something really powerful happens when we can

18:34.523 --> 18:51.798
[SPEAKER_02]: Remember and keep in our minds the things that God has already done, it really fuels our faith For the things that we've yet to see that we want him to do at least I know it really really does that for me Especially when I remember how God has shown up in my heart.

18:52.459 --> 18:52.920
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah

18:53.272 --> 18:58.719
[SPEAKER_02]: mean that that can't help but move you to both gratitude and faith.

19:00.001 --> 19:05.668
[SPEAKER_02]: And there's so much in my own like I think of my health journey specifically.

19:06.289 --> 19:08.231
[SPEAKER_02]: There's so much that I still hope for.

19:08.271 --> 19:10.054
[SPEAKER_02]: There is so much.

19:10.394 --> 19:12.096
[SPEAKER_03]: And you're suffering so much right now.

19:12.477 --> 19:13.118
[SPEAKER_02]: Unanswered.

19:13.358 --> 19:16.562
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, it has been a hard year health wise.

19:17.099 --> 19:36.120
[SPEAKER_03]: Can you I know this is going to be I don't want I'm not trying to divert from what you're saying but could you actually just give a little bit more of a window because If you haven't realized this anyone listening intentional is a movement of suffering and someone prophetically spoke that recently and that doesn't mean we're bringing suffering to everyone hopefully not.

19:36.100 --> 20:05.044
[SPEAKER_03]: But one that talks about the realness of life and that's our lived experience, we can't speak from who we're not, but I would just be curious, however much you want to share, and anyone listening, if you're a prayer person, which is just even think about praying for healing for Elizabeth, because I believe so many people are even hearing right now that want to pray with us, and honestly friends, if we give you a window into how hard each week was, and then our terrible responses to it, there's a good chance you might not listen.

20:05.024 --> 20:05.965
[SPEAKER_02]: But I was just looking at it.

20:05.985 --> 20:06.826
[SPEAKER_02]: Or you don't very soon.

20:07.707 --> 20:21.480
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, so maybe because you're going on this, you know, I'll hold the spot that you were talking about, which is how remembering in the hard, but could you just maybe explain for a second, a little bit of what the hard looks like for you on a daily basis?

20:22.161 --> 20:25.223
[SPEAKER_03]: And my one encouragement too, because I know you, it's be honest, if you have it.

20:25.243 --> 20:29.408
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, well, I don't have a, I don't feel like I have a hard time being honest about it.

20:30.148 --> 20:32.010
[SPEAKER_02]: But, um,

20:31.990 --> 20:38.701
[SPEAKER_02]: So, and I think I've said it on here before, I've had a long health journey.

20:38.741 --> 20:43.829
[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, really, since I was a kid, really started to seek answers right after we got married.

20:44.771 --> 20:49.138
[SPEAKER_02]: Most of my life never feeling great.

20:49.118 --> 20:59.747
[SPEAKER_02]: Um, but had always had ways to manage it, diet, exercise, lifestyle things, supplements that just helped manage the day to day.

20:59.787 --> 21:06.733
[SPEAKER_02]: There's just lots of things like fatigue and stomach issues and, um, didn't start out as pain.

21:07.554 --> 21:18.163
[SPEAKER_02]: But just over, you know, so many of listeners know our story, um, with our daughter and all the stress of that and then our son getting horribly sick.

21:18.143 --> 21:23.571
[SPEAKER_02]: for several years, my body just finally was like, I can't do this anymore.

21:24.613 --> 21:30.762
[SPEAKER_02]: And years and years of me pushing past all the signals my body was trying to give me.

21:31.683 --> 21:44.623
[SPEAKER_02]: But the somewhat short version is it progressed about five years ago to start it as like intermittent back pain which then progressed to constant excruciating back pain.

21:44.603 --> 21:52.676
[SPEAKER_02]: And joint pain, if I'm really flared up, it's like whole body, but my lower back spine is the main area.

21:53.717 --> 21:58.625
[SPEAKER_02]: And then I was flooded with diagnosis, the last, or diagnoses, is that the right word?

21:59.767 --> 22:00.688
[SPEAKER_02]: The last couple years.

22:00.908 --> 22:03.172
[SPEAKER_02]: So first it was endometriosis.

22:03.352 --> 22:04.474
[SPEAKER_02]: Then Lyme disease.

22:04.494 --> 22:06.277
[SPEAKER_02]: And I was like, okay, that's all the answers.

22:06.317 --> 22:07.579
[SPEAKER_02]: That's what's causing the joint pain.

22:08.861 --> 22:09.582
[SPEAKER_02]: But then,

22:09.562 --> 22:19.817
[SPEAKER_02]: within the last, like, two years in autoimmune disease called Inclosings Bondolitis, which is similar to rheumatoid arthritis, but starts in your SI joints in your spine.

22:21.079 --> 22:25.825
[SPEAKER_02]: So, excruciatingly painful inflammatory arthritis in my spine.

22:27.167 --> 22:32.515
[SPEAKER_02]: So, that has been, like, the journey of living with intense chronic pain.

22:34.503 --> 22:54.115
[SPEAKER_02]: I think I can say, as Ben, one of the hardest things I've ever endured and am enduring still, and I think I can also say, not as confidently as I want to, yet, but it's also

22:55.411 --> 23:03.559
[SPEAKER_02]: reshaped me and formed me in ways that I don't know anything else that could and is still currently actively doing that.

23:03.579 --> 23:05.041
[SPEAKER_02]: I think that's where some of the tears come.

23:05.061 --> 23:08.925
[SPEAKER_02]: It's like being reshaped his painful.

23:09.145 --> 23:13.890
[SPEAKER_02]: That's never, we're not formed by ease, we're formed by tension.

23:16.833 --> 23:20.777
[SPEAKER_02]: But it's been interesting to really, I feel like

23:22.158 --> 23:32.191
[SPEAKER_02]: when you suffer for a long time or encounter various forms of maybe especially difficult type things.

23:32.752 --> 23:41.183
[SPEAKER_02]: You start to ask different questions about God that you never have to ask when you're just facing, I mean, everyone suffers.

23:41.443 --> 23:42.745
[SPEAKER_02]: So let me just say that.

23:42.765 --> 23:44.447
[SPEAKER_02]: Everybody suffers on a daily basis.

23:44.848 --> 23:45.649
[SPEAKER_02]: We don't live.

23:47.051 --> 23:49.854
[SPEAKER_02]: It's not heaven till a heaven that's saying like that's very true.

23:50.035 --> 23:51.777
[SPEAKER_02]: We all suffer.

23:51.757 --> 23:58.524
[SPEAKER_02]: Um, and there's, it's not even really helpful to talk about different levels of suffering.

23:58.564 --> 23:59.405
[SPEAKER_03]: You want some Kleenex?

24:00.206 --> 24:00.907
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm okay.

24:00.927 --> 24:03.029
[SPEAKER_03]: You sure, because I'll, I'll stop this whole thing.

24:03.049 --> 24:04.651
[SPEAKER_02]: I think I'm gonna get a real deal.

24:04.671 --> 24:11.979
[SPEAKER_02]: Um, but I think when you like, suffer a little, maybe a little more deeply or for really prolonged periods of time.

24:12.019 --> 24:17.325
[SPEAKER_02]: You just ask questions that you don't otherwise have to face about God, about,

24:17.305 --> 24:24.996
[SPEAKER_02]: why he heals and sometimes he doesn't about all the scriptures that talk about what's suffering produces.

24:25.037 --> 24:28.181
[SPEAKER_02]: You start to see those and I completely different light.

24:29.523 --> 24:34.030
[SPEAKER_02]: And I really feel like I have a lot of question marks around my prayers.

24:34.531 --> 24:39.398
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, yes, I want to pray for full healing, but also I want to pray that

24:39.378 --> 24:43.844
[SPEAKER_02]: in the absence of healing that God would do something really beautiful.

24:44.425 --> 25:04.474
[SPEAKER_02]: And that's where to tie and reflection, that's where I think I find so much peace of like seeing what God has done through all the other hard things in our lives and in our family gives me hope to persevere in my current suffering that has not been alleviated.

25:04.454 --> 25:13.540
[SPEAKER_02]: to see, okay, if I can remember what God has done through the suffering of birdie, what he's done in our family.

25:16.649 --> 25:19.577
[SPEAKER_02]: It gives me a lot of hope for what he could do,

25:20.502 --> 25:29.717
[SPEAKER_02]: in the suffering that is my current reality, which I think is for me, it's like a daily fuel to keep going.

25:29.937 --> 25:33.944
[SPEAKER_02]: And there are days, you know, you are, get a front row seat to them.

25:35.045 --> 25:37.269
[SPEAKER_02]: There are days where hope is really hard to access.

25:38.110 --> 25:39.052
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, it feels hopeless.

25:39.633 --> 25:39.873
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

25:40.414 --> 25:44.721
[SPEAKER_02]: And then there are other days where gratitude is a lot easier to access.

25:45.943 --> 25:47.185
[SPEAKER_02]: But I think what I

25:48.970 --> 25:51.673
[SPEAKER_02]: think what I wish more Christians talked about.

25:51.693 --> 26:01.282
[SPEAKER_02]: I think, and part of his culture, we live in this culture that really only, well, literally only celebrates winds.

26:03.324 --> 26:14.075
[SPEAKER_02]: But I think, in the spiritual life, there are so many winds that come in the space between the prayer and the answer.

26:14.916 --> 26:16.277
[SPEAKER_02]: And sometimes we

26:17.523 --> 26:46.568
[SPEAKER_02]: in that space and so I think there's a there's a kind of a mode you have to click into when there's a cute suffering that you know has a potential to be temporary you can kind of click into a mode and I feel like I'm learning there's a different mode of operating needed when there's

26:47.425 --> 26:48.266
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

26:48.286 --> 26:51.551
[SPEAKER_03]: Can I maybe just to give you a cry break?

26:52.592 --> 26:52.692
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.

26:52.712 --> 27:08.414
[SPEAKER_03]: Um, thank you for being honest and Lord knows I have so much to grow in and being empathetic on a daily with my invitation isn't, is different than yours.

27:08.935 --> 27:15.424
[SPEAKER_03]: But man, I just want to also say that when one of your loved ones is suffering, you're all suffering.

27:15.404 --> 27:22.014
[SPEAKER_03]: and it doesn't mean that yours is greater or worse like that's not a helpful game to play and it's not even always true.

27:22.155 --> 27:32.130
[SPEAKER_03]: Like Elizabeth has to carry something that I can't carry and that is incredibly hard and it's arguably like harder because she can't escape it.

27:32.110 --> 27:45.694
[SPEAKER_03]: And I can't really either, but I'm also, it's different for me, but I think it's important to say that when one suffers deeply, your family suffers deeply, you suffer deeply, your marriage suffers deeply, because there's an entwined beauty about relationships.

27:46.876 --> 27:51.604
[SPEAKER_03]: One of the things that, as I constantly talked to my therapist about this,

27:51.584 --> 28:09.475
[SPEAKER_03]: He actually said he it was a really it was sharing a story and I and I think this will be very helpful to just maybe land the plane with what we're talking about when it comes to reflection even and being honest about how hard this year was if you were a type that wants to reframe everything I think one of the things we would encourage you with is like

28:09.455 --> 28:17.227
[SPEAKER_03]: Actually, give yourself space to reflect on how terrible certain parts of this last year were, and how sad they were, and how lonely you felt.

28:17.728 --> 28:25.541
[SPEAKER_03]: Not as a way to wallow, but as a way to realize like, even there, I would imagine without your perspective in that moment.

28:25.561 --> 28:29.387
[SPEAKER_03]: But as you look back, your perspective reminds you, God was there too.

28:29.467 --> 28:30.068
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.

28:30.388 --> 28:34.635
[SPEAKER_03]: But the story is, I was talking about therapists and you shared the story about,

28:34.615 --> 28:39.951
[SPEAKER_03]: How this guy was a communicator, he's a Jesus follower, he had a big platform and essentially he was saying.

28:40.606 --> 28:51.001
[SPEAKER_03]: My son couldn't go to college and we couldn't afford it, but then all of a sudden a wealthy businessman from Japan decided to call in and paid for my son's for your education.

28:51.041 --> 28:53.685
[SPEAKER_03]: And wow, isn't that amazing what God did?

28:53.705 --> 28:59.093
[SPEAKER_03]: And what I'm about to say is going to probably ruffles and feathers, but I don't care, it's not my story.

29:00.335 --> 29:05.162
[SPEAKER_03]: But one of the details to highlight is that when he told me this story,

29:05.142 --> 29:06.404
[SPEAKER_03]: I was like, yeah, that sounds about right.

29:06.444 --> 29:12.052
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, sounds like God used this man to provide, provide something.

29:12.693 --> 29:15.737
[SPEAKER_03]: And at Glance, I would go, yeah, yeah, and any Christian listening would go, yeah, yeah.

29:16.318 --> 29:21.625
[SPEAKER_03]: But what then, what my therapist had threw me off in the best way, and he's a very, to about Jesus' followers.

29:21.645 --> 29:23.307
[SPEAKER_03]: He said, well, God didn't do that.

29:24.169 --> 29:26.812
[SPEAKER_03]: I was like, wait, what your blown up my paradigms.

29:26.832 --> 29:33.782
[SPEAKER_03]: He's like, well, I mean, could God have encouraged him or nudged him maybe, but does he do that with everybody?

29:34.943 --> 29:53.982
[SPEAKER_03]: I don't know, and then he went on to say he's like You could say God did that or you could say this guy really wanted to be your friend because you have a big platform and one of the ways to be people's friends is when you help them and I was like That's an angle that I didn't expect and then he went on to say and this is where this lands for everyone if you're like already like I can't believe this is here as he

29:53.962 --> 30:05.742
[SPEAKER_03]: Of course God uses people to help us in different ways, but what he then said was, well, no one paid for my son's college, so what does that mean if God did that for him?

30:05.762 --> 30:06.884
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.

30:06.904 --> 30:07.946
[SPEAKER_03]: And didn't do it for me.

30:08.427 --> 30:12.814
[SPEAKER_03]: Does that mean that I'm unworthy, unwelcome for God's blessing?

30:12.794 --> 30:26.246
[SPEAKER_03]: And what he was trying to highlight, I think, in a deeper way, I don't think I know, is that we often will say, well, God did this, and maybe there was nudges or maybe not, and sometimes it's literally just people being generous.

30:27.229 --> 30:29.875
[SPEAKER_03]: And where this applies to healing is what if?

30:31.424 --> 30:34.248
[SPEAKER_03]: We take that same logic and go, well, God healed me.

30:34.408 --> 30:54.934
[SPEAKER_03]: Thank you, God for healing me, but it didn't heal you and that idea that this side of heaven, there is this crazy tension that we live in and it's suffering and the most sure thing that's going to happen in all of our lives is suffering and the most sure thing that we have to remember and be anchored to is that sometimes God does heal and sometimes he doesn't.

30:54.914 --> 31:02.745
[SPEAKER_03]: But you can be assured that if you are suffering, you are doing exactly what the human experience leads us to.

31:02.805 --> 31:07.051
[SPEAKER_03]: What Jesus says is going to happen, and we share with Christ through our suffering.

31:08.113 --> 31:09.094
[SPEAKER_03]: We share in His suffering.

31:09.174 --> 31:13.480
[SPEAKER_03]: And so if you're sitting here suffering, and somebody got healed.

31:13.460 --> 31:33.797
[SPEAKER_03]: Don't immediately go, well, God doesn't care for me and why would he do that for them and not for me sometimes he does have these moments where and we can explain it where he does heal and other times There's just medicine works and things happen and sometimes and again is God could be an all absolutely, but what I'm more trying to highlight not that

31:33.777 --> 31:56.205
[SPEAKER_03]: Not that omniscience of God, but more of like you have to just remember if you're suffering and you said this honey The gap between You are suffering and healing might be your whole life long and That's a really scary thing to think through and it's also amazing to realize we have a comforter But you got a name that stuff makes me think of that scripture.

31:56.285 --> 32:00.190
[SPEAKER_02]: This is all creation ground Like I think

32:01.587 --> 32:06.397
[SPEAKER_02]: when our souls are groaning, it feels like they shouldn't be, right?

32:06.497 --> 32:10.405
[SPEAKER_02]: And part of that is true, we weren't made to live in that groaning.

32:10.665 --> 32:15.094
[SPEAKER_02]: We were made for beauty and perfection and constant communion with God.

32:16.217 --> 32:17.920
[SPEAKER_02]: But we are not alone in our groaning.

32:18.161 --> 32:22.870
[SPEAKER_02]: All creation, all creation, every aspect of it, us included.

32:22.850 --> 32:23.411
[SPEAKER_02]: Yes.

32:23.571 --> 32:23.992
[SPEAKER_02]: Grounds.

32:24.933 --> 32:39.052
[SPEAKER_02]: And then, and then, and I can't even remember where it is, but like that when we can't even parade the spirit intercedes on our behalf, like brings those things to God that we can't even fully bring.

32:39.192 --> 32:47.223
[SPEAKER_02]: And you do have to sit in the, okay, we'll go ahead and answer this prayer for that person or you entered this certain prayer for me, but he's not answering this one.

32:47.443 --> 32:47.704
[SPEAKER_02]: Why?

32:47.724 --> 32:49.566
[SPEAKER_02]: And I,

32:49.546 --> 32:50.668
[SPEAKER_03]: That's a hard one.

32:50.688 --> 32:59.499
[SPEAKER_02]: At least for me, I've found that asking the question why over and over again, you have to do it at some point, but at some point it becomes actually unhelpful.

32:59.900 --> 33:00.140
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes.

33:00.901 --> 33:14.119
[SPEAKER_02]: And I find myself a more helpful question when you're sitting in that unanswered season or years and years and years is what got what.

33:15.230 --> 33:17.114
[SPEAKER_02]: What do you want to show me?

33:17.155 --> 33:21.144
[SPEAKER_02]: What do you want me to know about you and what level?

33:21.605 --> 33:28.682
[SPEAKER_02]: Because I truly feel like we have a different access to God when we're deeply suffering.

33:28.943 --> 33:32.952
[SPEAKER_02]: And I don't have, like, a scripture that dealersically completely backs that up.

33:32.932 --> 33:39.909
[SPEAKER_02]: other than that there are scriptures all over the Bible about the majority of the presence in the midst of of suffering.

33:40.330 --> 33:44.380
[SPEAKER_02]: So I guess I do have the ability to back it up.

33:45.302 --> 33:50.755
[SPEAKER_02]: And so I think that's where I'm continuously coming back to of like okay God.

33:50.735 --> 33:53.359
[SPEAKER_02]: What do you want to show me?

33:53.719 --> 33:58.806
[SPEAKER_02]: Who do you want to be to me in this and who do you want me to become because of this?

33:59.527 --> 34:03.012
[SPEAKER_02]: To me that's much more helpful than always asking why.

34:03.172 --> 34:10.903
[SPEAKER_02]: And do I have moments when I'm hearing about another beautiful miraculous healing story where thoughts of why I come into my mind?

34:10.883 --> 34:11.684
[SPEAKER_02]: Absolutely.

34:12.245 --> 34:14.649
[SPEAKER_02]: And for me, I think that's actually quite healthy.

34:15.310 --> 34:31.255
[SPEAKER_02]: But when we only get stuck there, if our only solution is that the outcome is what we wanted it to be, then our view of God will be greatly limited and greatly dependent on if He performs the way we're wanting it to.

34:32.247 --> 34:46.831
[SPEAKER_02]: But if instead, I can truly believe that God can do things far beyond what I could ask and can imagine in my limited view of how the story should end, then God is so much bigger.

34:48.053 --> 34:48.153
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

34:48.173 --> 34:58.710
[SPEAKER_02]: And so again, back to the reflection, it would be easy for me to say that this past year was a horrible health year.

34:58.943 --> 35:08.322
[SPEAKER_02]: And that I have more unanswered questions and that I don't understand why God is not answering my prayer for healing.

35:08.342 --> 35:18.201
[SPEAKER_02]: I could stop there or I could also and I lot of that is true, but I could also look back and cling to.

35:19.497 --> 35:22.161
[SPEAKER_02]: all the things God has done in the past, not just in this past year.

35:23.143 --> 35:37.245
[SPEAKER_02]: And there are very specific things that God has brought this year, a new doctor, that I felt very listened to for the first time, not dismissed, who literally said, I'm not letting you go another five years in this level of pain.

35:37.265 --> 35:42.533
[SPEAKER_03]: Because I physically held them and said, if you do not have a large kidney, what they have had moments like that.

35:42.553 --> 35:45.117
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, I've definitely taken Brooke to Dr.'s appointments, but...

35:45.097 --> 35:56.453
[SPEAKER_02]: I had three steroid injections in my back, like trying new things, started a new medication that is scary and hopeful at the same time.

35:57.314 --> 36:02.001
[SPEAKER_02]: That could be the tool God uses for great progress in 20, 20 seconds.

36:02.361 --> 36:15.019
[SPEAKER_03]: But can I just, I'm not trying to catch you off but to add to that point, you know, something for us just to be very honest, a very real moment that I think it gives visual to the

36:17.362 --> 36:33.227
[SPEAKER_03]: is there's this new drug that we have prayed through and thought through and like okay do we do we we go into this and we're not going to tell you here because that's private information but also if you're a person that's like I have all the solutions for this and you know what they want to hear all my strongly tried them all about.

36:33.207 --> 36:34.729
[SPEAKER_03]: about how this should go.

36:34.749 --> 36:42.679
[SPEAKER_03]: Could I just ask you to just please take a second and just hang on that to that email just like we would appreciate prayer over.

36:42.719 --> 36:45.162
[SPEAKER_03]: We have a team that is caring for us in a deep way.

36:45.182 --> 36:48.526
[SPEAKER_03]: Now that doesn't mean we're against information and we're against ideas for sure.

36:48.946 --> 36:57.797
[SPEAKER_03]: But like honestly what we would appreciate more than we want to share this honestly, but we also want to be you know honest that you

36:57.777 --> 37:25.017
[SPEAKER_03]: We don't want to massive long email like you know what this I get it like we it's tricky and it's complicated And we're trying to talk about this in a new one's way, but the visual that I'll never forget is we've basically been praying for this And we're sitting on the bathroom floor of our girls bathroom And I'm about to give you this shot because you hate needles and

37:26.752 --> 37:43.326
[SPEAKER_03]: us praying like we don't know if this is going to be good or bad, but if you get the picture there's such a level of vulnerability there of like we don't know we're just laying on the bathroom floor, we're about to get my wife shot and I don't know if this is going to help her herder.

37:45.466 --> 37:53.462
[SPEAKER_03]: and right before, as I place this thing on your leg, you're praying, you know, that that's just really raw.

37:53.602 --> 37:55.506
[SPEAKER_03]: It's, it's honestly quite private.

37:55.546 --> 37:58.632
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm happy to share it, but it's like a... Not private anymore.

37:59.742 --> 38:02.344
[SPEAKER_03]: I don't think it's, I don't think it's like off limits.

38:02.545 --> 38:10.592
[SPEAKER_03]: I just mean, our hope is, but honestly though, the reason I show this is because I want to say, our life is like your life.

38:10.692 --> 38:15.477
[SPEAKER_03]: How many of you have had those moments where you're crying on the bathroom floor and pain or frustration and sadness and despair?

38:16.177 --> 38:17.138
[SPEAKER_03]: Like God, what's happening?

38:18.219 --> 38:20.661
[SPEAKER_03]: We have that too, and we have to sit in it with you.

38:20.701 --> 38:22.743
[SPEAKER_03]: And we do sit in it with you, right?

38:22.783 --> 38:26.847
[SPEAKER_03]: Like in that sense, we can remember.

38:26.827 --> 38:45.156
[SPEAKER_03]: why we have to remember and why it's important is because this is a pattern of the human experience and even with God's people what happens they forget and what happens when they start forgetting they drift and then what happens they repeat cycles they forget they drift and they repeat cycles and so that is that is the story of the Bible of what

38:46.908 --> 38:49.691
[SPEAKER_02]: what humanity does over and over and over again.

38:49.711 --> 38:52.274
[SPEAKER_02]: And then God calling us to do something different.

38:52.434 --> 38:56.899
[SPEAKER_02]: To remember, to return and to reorder our lives.

38:57.660 --> 39:08.992
[SPEAKER_02]: And I think that remembering starts that returning to God, understanding is heart, returning to his heart, which then leads to reordering our lives.

39:09.052 --> 39:10.654
[SPEAKER_02]: And how many of us,

39:10.634 --> 39:11.835
[SPEAKER_02]: start the new year.

39:11.895 --> 39:13.137
[SPEAKER_02]: We do this backwards.

39:13.377 --> 39:17.262
[SPEAKER_02]: We start trying to reorder our lives out of our own grit and strength.

39:17.902 --> 39:19.424
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to finally start these new habits.

39:19.444 --> 39:21.046
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to finally read my Bible.

39:21.226 --> 39:23.148
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to finally do these things.

39:24.029 --> 39:32.659
[SPEAKER_02]: And I just wonder if the invitation that we see over and over in Scripture is so applicable to how we start a new year.

39:32.639 --> 39:45.904
[SPEAKER_02]: of what if we actually reordered our lives last because it's the spirit of God that reordered our lives, not our strength and our effort takes us a certain distance, usually till about February, or maybe mid January.

39:46.845 --> 39:54.059
[SPEAKER_03]: And we're not knocking like beautiful habits, like obviously how information is so key, but it is a part of the process.

39:54.079 --> 39:55.862
[SPEAKER_03]: It's not the whole answer to it.

39:55.842 --> 40:02.973
[SPEAKER_02]: But I think that the VC that God tries to teach us over and over again, remember return reorder.

40:04.275 --> 40:17.375
[SPEAKER_02]: And so that's what we just, I mean, that's why we're talking about this, that in remembering in the scriptures is not just about the past, but it's how the past then shapes the present and the future.

40:17.716 --> 40:17.976
[SPEAKER_02]: Yes.

40:18.537 --> 40:19.258
[SPEAKER_03]: And learn from it.

40:19.438 --> 40:19.779
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.

40:19.799 --> 40:23.284
[SPEAKER_03]: But it's you're educating yourself on what to do different in the future.

40:23.635 --> 40:26.262
[SPEAKER_02]: which I think applies to so many things.

40:26.282 --> 40:36.428
[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, you think we talk great length on here about generational sin and generational trauma and breaking those things.

40:37.350 --> 40:40.699
[SPEAKER_02]: And you have to look at the past, you have to look back.

40:40.679 --> 40:44.627
[SPEAKER_02]: for the the present and the future to be shaped in a different way.

40:45.008 --> 40:58.456
[SPEAKER_02]: Otherwise, we just naturally recommit those same things because we do what we've been modeled if we don't if if we don't pause and say, no, I want to look at this differently.

40:59.017 --> 41:00.240
[SPEAKER_02]: The starts with remembering.

41:00.946 --> 41:11.926
[SPEAKER_03]: I want to move to just one practice of story and then talking about faith and the importance of projection and projection is just a word to say we need to project faith into the future with Jesus.

41:12.046 --> 41:16.114
[SPEAKER_03]: But examine is probably one of the more helpful things you've heard of this before.

41:16.154 --> 41:18.398
[SPEAKER_03]: We've talked about it before and if you're like another spiritual practice.

41:18.378 --> 41:20.481
[SPEAKER_03]: This is like, this is literally the whole thing.

41:20.642 --> 41:24.267
[SPEAKER_03]: It's to remember, so you can return, so you can reorder.

41:24.748 --> 41:26.711
[SPEAKER_03]: So there's multiple ways to do that.

41:26.972 --> 41:28.134
[SPEAKER_03]: You can do that by weekly.

41:28.174 --> 41:29.416
[SPEAKER_03]: You can do that every single day.

41:29.456 --> 41:30.597
[SPEAKER_03]: You can do that once a month.

41:31.078 --> 41:36.066
[SPEAKER_03]: I want to give a quick story that is about forced examination.

41:37.108 --> 41:40.313
[SPEAKER_03]: And as I mentioned recently, it's my 40th birthday.

41:41.134 --> 41:42.276
[SPEAKER_03]: And

41:42.256 --> 41:44.438
[SPEAKER_03]: I was, I'm not scared about getting old.

41:44.578 --> 41:45.740
[SPEAKER_03]: I like being older.

41:45.920 --> 41:48.142
[SPEAKER_03]: Like aging has never been like a bummer to me.

41:48.162 --> 41:50.545
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm not like, oh my gosh, I'm getting older.

41:50.605 --> 41:52.327
[SPEAKER_03]: Like I'm fine with it, I like it.

41:52.467 --> 41:53.388
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm a great with it.

41:54.269 --> 42:09.985
[SPEAKER_03]: The thing that hit me was really as I'm getting close to, as I was getting closer to the day of actually turning 40, I just had a couple realizations that I had never connected with in my own past, with my own family of origin and things that I was just really processing.

42:09.965 --> 42:26.151
[SPEAKER_03]: And honestly, for the first time, just honest with myself and enough to greet about, and honestly, examine this led to I had some wonderful friends come from all over the place, all of the country, but also just deep people in my life who were around and we rented a house, went away for a couple of days.

42:26.738 --> 42:28.142
[SPEAKER_03]: And the second morning I woke up.

42:28.784 --> 42:37.371
[SPEAKER_03]: I was like hit with a level of like grief, awareness, examine that was like hard to get out of.

42:37.792 --> 42:40.039
[SPEAKER_03]: Like I called you as don't go into detail, but just.

42:41.251 --> 42:43.634
[SPEAKER_03]: a lot of tears, a lot of just things I was processing.

42:44.395 --> 42:48.140
[SPEAKER_03]: And it wasn't cause I'd like done something bad and never confess just nothing like that.

42:48.160 --> 43:02.398
[SPEAKER_03]: It was like literally just an examination of life and depth and the coolest moment I wanna say is like, you told me, Elizabeth, you said, you need to go, like whatever you had planned for this day, like you just need to go.

43:02.378 --> 43:05.663
[SPEAKER_03]: move it off the calendar and just go tell these guys.

43:05.883 --> 43:08.067
[SPEAKER_03]: These are the safest guys that you can talk to you about this.

43:09.048 --> 43:10.210
[SPEAKER_03]: And I mean, it was the coolest moment.

43:10.270 --> 43:14.357
[SPEAKER_03]: I went out and in all sorts of emotions and tears just shared my life.

43:14.557 --> 43:22.429
[SPEAKER_03]: And just like, here's the things I'm grieving, even regarding health and regarding like the sadness and the pain of how come this hasn't changed yet.

43:22.409 --> 43:33.303
[SPEAKER_03]: And there's a version of that which was remembering and examining, and it was the most one of the more healing experiences of my entire life, not only because people were there praying, encouraging, building up.

43:33.844 --> 43:38.090
[SPEAKER_03]: We didn't get away for a week and to drink to entertain, to just escape.

43:38.170 --> 43:43.557
[SPEAKER_03]: It was a getting away to like deepen, and there was an examine that went there, and I'm telling you friends,

43:43.537 --> 43:57.980
[SPEAKER_03]: Having people in your life that can help you examine, but you also examining what Jesus is one of the most effective helpful tools that if you're going to add something for next year, add it now, but even take a moment to try to begin to examine, where were the moments that I was like really strong last year?

43:58.000 --> 43:59.222
[SPEAKER_03]: Where are the moments that are really weak?

43:59.242 --> 44:07.435
[SPEAKER_03]: And be honest about both, be equally as honest, and notice where God sustained you in 2025, where that come practically, physically and emotionally financially.

44:07.415 --> 44:19.133
[SPEAKER_03]: And when you name those things of gratitude, it's like it's a remembrance, it's not positivity, you're remembering so that you can actually return so you can reorder.

44:19.253 --> 44:21.296
[SPEAKER_03]: It is not without you're remembering this stuff.

44:21.516 --> 44:26.123
[SPEAKER_03]: And gratitude is simply a way for you to actually do that so you don't forget and drift and repeat.

44:26.624 --> 44:28.366
[SPEAKER_03]: So that is why we're talking about these.

44:28.427 --> 44:29.909
[SPEAKER_03]: So I really want to encourage you.

44:29.929 --> 44:31.431
[SPEAKER_03]: We could talk about this at length, but

44:32.575 --> 44:39.223
[SPEAKER_03]: take some time to examine, take some time to recall the moments of beauty and pain as you enter into 26.

44:39.264 --> 44:44.310
[SPEAKER_03]: And just be honest, and if this is past, if you're listening to this in January or February, may I need to.

44:44.330 --> 44:45.812
[SPEAKER_03]: This is effective at any moment.

44:47.534 --> 44:50.518
[SPEAKER_03]: But let's talk about, so we have reflection, let's talk about projection.

44:51.159 --> 44:56.085
[SPEAKER_03]: And I want to talk about, you know, leaning into 26 through habits of faith.

44:56.065 --> 45:04.395
[SPEAKER_03]: I want to give just a couple quotes that I have written in my journal that I constantly go back to almost on a daily basis to remind me of the importance and power of faith.

45:05.116 --> 45:08.721
[SPEAKER_03]: Dallas will urge that all three of them because what it gives you is to the world, what it gives you is to the world.

45:08.881 --> 45:16.150
[SPEAKER_03]: What it gives you is, but he just said these three and I'll say them here and I'm a salmon order or rather I'll say them and then I'll process them.

45:16.130 --> 45:17.652
[SPEAKER_03]: Faith isn't just believing something's true.

45:17.913 --> 45:20.717
[SPEAKER_03]: It's acting on that belief as if it were true.

45:21.538 --> 45:26.345
[SPEAKER_03]: So that's the idea that we are not just, you know, believing it, we're acting.

45:26.526 --> 45:28.208
[SPEAKER_03]: We're operating as if this is real.

45:28.729 --> 45:34.898
[SPEAKER_03]: Second one, if you do not, well actually, I'm going to say the other one for a scouts power is meant to be at the disposal of human beings.

45:34.878 --> 45:35.559
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay.

45:36.380 --> 45:40.705
[SPEAKER_03]: Anyone listening that like needs faith, God's power is meant to be at the disposal of human beings.

45:40.765 --> 45:45.850
[SPEAKER_03]: Now there's a level of trust, humility, godliness where he will actually use to dispense that power.

45:46.171 --> 45:52.158
[SPEAKER_03]: He's not just going to give that to everybody, but it is by nature designed to be at the disposal of human beings.

45:52.258 --> 45:53.339
[SPEAKER_03]: That's overwhelming and cool.

45:53.839 --> 46:01.408
[SPEAKER_03]: The next one is in lastly, if you do not rise up and go after God's blessing, he will rarely just give it to you.

46:02.047 --> 46:11.056
[SPEAKER_03]: What keeps me praying is that if you do not rise up and go after God's blessing, he rarely will just give it to you.

46:12.318 --> 46:15.461
[SPEAKER_03]: And that keeps me in a place of prayer.

46:15.941 --> 46:26.232
[SPEAKER_03]: It keeps you in place of asking, seeking knocking, not because, oh man, I want to be godly, but because I believe that God really actually wants to do beauty in my life and in the world.

46:26.212 --> 46:41.250
[SPEAKER_03]: And this is where I think for all of us as we pray into 2026 as we think through and wherever you are in this timestamp, right, like it is important that you actually rise up and go after God's blessing.

46:41.230 --> 46:43.957
[SPEAKER_03]: it's important that I rise up and go after healing for you.

46:43.997 --> 46:45.562
[SPEAKER_03]: Now am I the healer?

46:45.722 --> 46:47.066
[SPEAKER_03]: No, am I going to be the agent of healing?

46:47.126 --> 46:55.508
[SPEAKER_03]: Absolutely not, but God says you have the power to do these things on others behalf with my power, right?

46:55.528 --> 46:57.433
[SPEAKER_03]: His power working through us to do that.

46:57.413 --> 47:03.339
[SPEAKER_03]: And so I just want to highlight, there's a few things that are just very important as you get into this.

47:03.880 --> 47:10.727
[SPEAKER_03]: Remember Luke 18, like, short-repeated prayers, they train us when you're just praying throughout the day.

47:10.747 --> 47:12.269
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, this is a huge gift for 2026.

47:12.309 --> 47:18.996
[SPEAKER_03]: Where can you just step into praying the pain points of your life into with Jesus and for healing?

47:19.616 --> 47:20.517
[SPEAKER_03]: And it's a beautiful thing.

47:20.557 --> 47:21.278
[SPEAKER_03]: Are you going to say something?

47:21.562 --> 47:30.440
[SPEAKER_02]: Well, I'm just thinking, it just makes me think of all of, uh, he was chapter 11, where it's naming all these men and women of great faith.

47:31.602 --> 47:38.035
[SPEAKER_02]: And every, every naming of each person starts with by faith, Noah.

47:38.015 --> 47:39.456
[SPEAKER_02]: by faith Abraham.

47:40.077 --> 47:43.660
[SPEAKER_02]: And like we see their full stories, we see Abraham's doubt.

47:44.261 --> 47:47.604
[SPEAKER_02]: And we see the fact that he didn't really believe that God could do it through Sarah.

47:48.084 --> 47:48.825
[SPEAKER_02]: So there's Haggard.

47:48.925 --> 47:57.212
[SPEAKER_02]: Like we we see the holes in the story and yet the account in the scriptures of this, you know, we call it the Hall of Faith.

47:57.513 --> 48:02.357
[SPEAKER_02]: Like is that by faith Abraham believed, you know?

48:02.517 --> 48:05.760
[SPEAKER_02]: And so faith is not the absence of

48:06.567 --> 48:11.772
[SPEAKER_02]: But when you're choosing to say, I'm going to choose to believe that God has the power to do this.

48:11.953 --> 48:14.655
[SPEAKER_02]: Now, he may or may or may not do it.

48:15.396 --> 48:18.079
[SPEAKER_02]: But I choose to believe that he has the power to do that.

48:19.501 --> 48:21.262
[SPEAKER_02]: That is living by faith.

48:21.663 --> 48:30.232
[SPEAKER_02]: And it's tricky because at the very same time, we have to open handedly be able to release the outcomes we think should be the right ones.

48:31.093 --> 48:35.157
[SPEAKER_02]: But I think I've learned a lot from you

48:36.858 --> 48:39.402
[SPEAKER_02]: you have a great amount of faith.

48:39.623 --> 48:50.240
[SPEAKER_02]: And I think it's not even this death grip, uh, because sometimes we can think we're having faith, but really we're death gripping on control about comes.

48:50.681 --> 48:51.602
[SPEAKER_02]: And I'll see that in you.

48:51.622 --> 48:55.609
[SPEAKER_02]: I see like a release about comes, but also like, but I'm going to believe

48:55.589 --> 49:24.887
[SPEAKER_02]: for a better future, and, and yeah, I think that there's something really powerful about that, especially for somebody more like me, who's highly logical leads towards being pessimistic instead of optimistic often times as a self-protection, but not wanting to be let down, but of truly like asking God for more faith, I think of even so many instances of healing in the Scriptures where we hear Jesus say your faith has made you well.

49:24.867 --> 49:53.423
[SPEAKER_02]: You know, no, I think that's we have to be careful with certain ways of saying that because I think obviously there's been some missed theology taught of Well, you just have not been healed or God has not given you that financial thing or that thing because you don't have enough faith That's not what we're saying But I do think there is an invitation Especially if that's not a strong point for you Some people need to focus more on

49:54.584 --> 50:03.620
[SPEAKER_02]: accepting certain realities and allowing God to meet them in that and other people, maybe more like me, need to ask God for more faith.

50:03.821 --> 50:06.967
[SPEAKER_02]: That idea of, like, I believe helped my unbelief.

50:07.788 --> 50:08.309
[SPEAKER_03]: Absolutely.

50:08.329 --> 50:10.934
[SPEAKER_03]: I think a great resource for this kind of faith.

50:10.974 --> 50:15.462
[SPEAKER_03]: I mean, Mark Patterson, if you've ever heard of him, he's a great dude, a friend, and a funny, funny man.

50:15.442 --> 50:18.888
[SPEAKER_03]: But he wrote a book that really changed my perspective on this.

50:19.028 --> 50:21.131
[SPEAKER_03]: I think there's a lot of other books on this, right?

50:21.151 --> 50:22.013
[SPEAKER_03]: Like this is only one.

50:22.033 --> 50:24.797
[SPEAKER_03]: But I think if you're talking about faith specifically, circle prayers.

50:24.997 --> 50:26.139
[SPEAKER_03]: This is book, get that.

50:26.159 --> 50:27.882
[SPEAKER_03]: That is very, very helpful.

50:28.743 --> 50:29.685
[SPEAKER_03]: Primarily story.

50:30.226 --> 50:36.135
[SPEAKER_03]: It will just build your faith through, through truly, like what he's basically doing is remembering out loud all the prayers that God answered.

50:37.117 --> 50:38.920
[SPEAKER_03]: And that is essentially what the book is.

50:39.060 --> 50:42.225
[SPEAKER_03]: And by the end of it, you're like, oh my gosh, what if I had faith for the same?

50:42.205 --> 50:46.792
[SPEAKER_03]: And so, these are going to be really simple, but they're simple on purpose.

50:48.135 --> 50:53.263
[SPEAKER_03]: There's just, through 2026, I would just encourage you, as you project, this is not manifesting.

50:53.704 --> 51:00.815
[SPEAKER_03]: This is you sitting down with Jesus to say, what are some of the things you want to reorder, what are some of the things you want to do, and get curious.

51:00.875 --> 51:05.142
[SPEAKER_03]: I think a lot of the times, remember, God gives you the desires of your heart.

51:05.122 --> 51:11.972
[SPEAKER_03]: That's a funny phrase, but how that often works is when we're walking with Jesus over time, he reshaves our desires to be more like his.

51:12.593 --> 51:16.860
[SPEAKER_03]: And therefore, then we are to ask for the desires of our heart, and he wants to give us those.

51:16.920 --> 51:22.388
[SPEAKER_03]: Now, if you're completely walking in your own deal, complete selfishness, complete in total, just...

51:22.368 --> 51:25.594
[SPEAKER_03]: I want to do my deal so I can do my thing.

51:26.255 --> 51:29.881
[SPEAKER_03]: That's not what I'm talking about, but oftentimes, we're scared to ask for the desires of our heart.

51:30.061 --> 51:42.182
[SPEAKER_03]: There's so many people I talked to on a weekly basis, who are like, well, I have this really big dream of my heart, but I'm kind of scared to ask for it, because I mean, I really want it, and can I ask him for it, and is it selfish, and it's like,

51:42.162 --> 51:43.263
[SPEAKER_03]: Well, we'll slow down.

51:43.703 --> 51:44.564
[SPEAKER_03]: Are you walking with Jesus?

51:44.945 --> 51:46.045
[SPEAKER_03]: Is your life submitted to Him?

51:46.426 --> 51:47.287
[SPEAKER_03]: Are you obedient?

51:48.147 --> 52:01.439
[SPEAKER_03]: If you are walking in prayer, centered in scripture in some formality throughout the week, and doing your best to obey God, he is interested in putting these desires, not only in your heart, but fulfilling them.

52:01.800 --> 52:06.144
[SPEAKER_03]: And so I would encourage you right down the dreams in your heart, and begin to talk to God about Him.

52:06.384 --> 52:12.169
[SPEAKER_03]: I have, if you solve things in my journal and thank you,

52:12.149 --> 52:37.414
[SPEAKER_03]: Which people upon first glance would read and go, that's pretty, that's pretty ballsy like you should not be praying that and I would probably agree with you on some of these things And then at the same time I'm like, I actually like work all to ask I trust that God can like put where my hearts at in the right perspective And either with hold the thing if it's going to be destructive or give the thing if it's going to be helpful And I'm not God so I can ask and I trust that he can nuance where it needs to go

52:37.394 --> 52:43.410
[SPEAKER_03]: But the very clear thing is so many of our prayers are not answered because they're never asked.

52:43.611 --> 52:46.759
[SPEAKER_03]: The greatest tragedy in life is not unanswered prayer.

52:46.860 --> 52:48.524
[SPEAKER_03]: It's unoffered prayer, FB Meyer said.

52:48.725 --> 52:50.610
[SPEAKER_03]: And that is a prayer.

52:50.650 --> 52:53.698
[SPEAKER_03]: That's the thing for my own mind and life that as you're thinking in faith.

52:53.678 --> 53:05.532
[SPEAKER_03]: Just ask the thing, like, how often is God just like, I'm just waiting for you to talk to me about it and I think as you enter 26, how can that be a place of not over positivity when that's not what we're talking about.

53:05.552 --> 53:10.477
[SPEAKER_03]: We're talking about living a life surrender to Jesus and actually stepping into faith.

53:10.537 --> 53:19.628
[SPEAKER_03]: So where can you reflect, right, but where can you project and in prayer and those three things again, I just want to say it really, I was a little loose about it, but I want to be really clear.

53:20.889 --> 53:21.390
[SPEAKER_03]: Pray.

53:22.619 --> 53:30.191
[SPEAKER_03]: consistently read the Scriptures as often as you can to understand the language and the life and the character of Jesus and obey it.

53:30.692 --> 53:33.717
[SPEAKER_03]: I know this sounds so simple and honestly like, dude are you kidding me?

53:34.738 --> 53:38.805
[SPEAKER_03]: These three things are what often stop us from moving ever in our faith.

53:38.785 --> 53:55.107
[SPEAKER_03]: It's because we know that these are things, but we're often slow to incorporate them in our lives, but I'm telling you, if you are praying, if you are reading, it's just to get the heart and character of Jesus, and then you're doing your best to obey when He invites you to something.

53:55.087 --> 53:58.492
[SPEAKER_03]: Friends, that's the recipe for life, and peace, enjoy the side of heaven.

53:58.713 --> 54:12.755
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I love that you mentioned reading the scriptures regularly because you do that alone and you will be constantly reminded to remember and to project in faith and pray.

54:12.995 --> 54:16.200
[SPEAKER_02]: Like because we see that all over the scriptures, we see

54:16.180 --> 54:17.122
[SPEAKER_02]: that remembrance.

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[SPEAKER_02]: We see what happens when people don't remember.

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[SPEAKER_02]: We see God's gentle, beautiful reminder to call us to remember and again.

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[SPEAKER_02]: And then we see the incredible faith of men women that God used greatly, flawed, not anything special men and women who just had faith that God had the power to accomplish what He said He would do.

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[SPEAKER_02]: And we know I'm thinking of

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[SPEAKER_02]: these things for your family.

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[SPEAKER_02]: We know God's heart for family.

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[SPEAKER_02]: We know that he wants it to be a source of life and of healing and a springboard for your kids.

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[SPEAKER_02]: We know the enemy wants the opposite.

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[SPEAKER_02]: He wants it to be a place of hurt and rejection and but God has the power to rewrite any family's story.

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[SPEAKER_02]: So I'm thinking of, I mean I'll just be honest,

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[SPEAKER_02]: projecting, believing for praying, asking God for yes for my continued healing that will for sure be one.

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[SPEAKER_02]: But also for continued healing in our family, our family's been through a lot.

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[SPEAKER_02]: They're we're picking up the pieces from a lot of hard years.

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[SPEAKER_02]: And so that's the thing I'm going to be praying for.

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[SPEAKER_02]: The God would radically,

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[SPEAKER_02]: redeem the years the locus is eaten and that we would see the relation and thinking relationally in our home right now that we would see relationships among our kids radically strengthened.

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[SPEAKER_02]: And so be praying those pairs of faith for your family.

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[SPEAKER_02]: God can do that.

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[SPEAKER_02]: He can do it in a year.

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[SPEAKER_02]: He can do it in 10 years.

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[SPEAKER_02]: He can do it in 20.

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[SPEAKER_02]: We don't get to set the timeline.

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[SPEAKER_02]: But exactly to your point, like not asking

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[SPEAKER_03]: Unanswered.

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[SPEAKER_03]: The greatest tragedy in life is not unanswered prayer.

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[SPEAKER_03]: It is un-offering prayer.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

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[SPEAKER_03]: So offer your prayers.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And truly, I mean, this is again an invitation.

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[SPEAKER_03]: I want to read a prayer over you.

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[SPEAKER_03]: We'll have this in the show notes if you want to print it out.

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[SPEAKER_03]: There is nothing wrong with borrowing other people's language to pray as your own and truly the point isn't to get a resource on prayer.

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[SPEAKER_03]: The point is to actually just pray and if there's a barrier of like, why just need language?

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[SPEAKER_03]: That was one of the reasons we did sewing a hidden seed.

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[SPEAKER_03]: It was just like, here's something, use it.

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[SPEAKER_03]: The point isn't to use this as much as it has it is to start praying.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And so

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[SPEAKER_03]: take this, this prayer will be in the show notes.

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[SPEAKER_03]: You can print it out for 2026.

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[SPEAKER_03]: However, you want to do it, put it on the note app, whatever you need.

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[SPEAKER_03]: But we're just going to pray this over you.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And again, borrow this language as your own.

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[SPEAKER_03]: And what we want to do is just simply, we'll close our time with this and want to just remind everyone, pre moves the hand of God.

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[SPEAKER_03]: You partner with God and prayer, not only in your reflection, but in your

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[SPEAKER_03]: God, as we stand at the edge of this year, we slow ourselves before you.

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[SPEAKER_03]: We look back over 20, 25 with honesty, the joy, the loss, the prayers answered, and the prayers still open.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Help us notice where you were faithful, even when we didn't see it at the time.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Let remembrance form trust in us.

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[SPEAKER_03]: As we step into 2026, or whatever year, people are listening to now, we lean forward with hope.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Teach us to pray without giving up.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Form our habits, not just our intentions.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Help us act as if your kingdom is real, because it is.

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[SPEAKER_03]: We release what we cannot carry forward.

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[SPEAKER_03]: We receive the grace we will need for what lies ahead.

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[SPEAKER_03]: Amen.

