[SPEAKER_01]: Hello everybody welcome to Heather Shaw is kidding.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's me Heather Shaw happy Wednesday.
[SPEAKER_01]: How you doing out there huh?
[SPEAKER_01]: I hope you're doing well.
[SPEAKER_01]: I am doing well.
[SPEAKER_01]: Lots going on.
[SPEAKER_01]: Dick Cheney dead.
[SPEAKER_01]: He died too soon.
[SPEAKER_01]: He was only 84.
[SPEAKER_01]: He I mean he could have worked 10 more years in Congress.
[SPEAKER_01]: I know he was an in Congress.
[SPEAKER_01]: We'll get into him a little not really the DC dick chain upcoming shows.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm this whole week.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm in Cleveland, Columbus, Massinal, Ohio, Fort Wayne, Indiana and Chicago, Illinois next weekend.
[SPEAKER_01]: I am in Dallas, Texas for the weekend at the Dallas comedy club.
[SPEAKER_01]: And then a bunch of other shows throughout the year, into next year, we're filming a special soon.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's going to be very exciting.
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's just say if you're in Wisconsin, you should get tickets to that special.
[SPEAKER_01]: But I'll announce that in a few, maybe next week.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'll have that ready to go.
[SPEAKER_01]: Don't forget to rate and review this podcast.
[SPEAKER_01]: If you like, you know what I like.
[SPEAKER_01]: Five letters, one word.
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's say it together.
[SPEAKER_01]: Quave!
[SPEAKER_01]: Uh, get tickets to another shot comedy.com.
[SPEAKER_01]: By the way, I didn't tell you that.
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[SPEAKER_01]: This pussy ain't free bitch.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's three whole dollars.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Join it baby.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a good one.
[SPEAKER_01]: Right, Dick Cheney dead dead
[SPEAKER_01]: Dick Cheney kind of ran uh... he was a basically a shadow president i mean he was just in George bush's ear just telling him what to do after nine eleven uh... so r i pdo a former president dick cheney uh... someone i saw somebody's i think it was reductress uh... that meme instagram it's like onion for women reductress but they posted uh... dick cheney has invaded hell and that's really it
[SPEAKER_01]: That's great, 84 years old, so you know, our current presidents about almost 80s, 79.
[SPEAKER_01]: Things are, you know, when you get in your 80s, that's when things go awry, apparently Dick Cheney had cardiac, cardiac and vascular disease, as you do as a white man eating meat probably.
[SPEAKER_01]: And bombing a lot of people, just starting wars really is bad for your cardiovascular health, start especially for starting unfounded wars, you know, for weapons of mass destruction that just line your pockets with oil money.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it's really going to take a toll on your cardio vascular health.
[SPEAKER_01]: So watch out, if you want a good heart, don't start wars.
[SPEAKER_01]: We should, we have no business starting.
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
[SPEAKER_01]: Zorran Mamdenay.
[SPEAKER_01]: Zorran.
[SPEAKER_01]: Zorran is going to win.
[SPEAKER_01]: It seems.
[SPEAKER_01]: the mayor.
[SPEAKER_01]: The mayor rates in New York City, Zoran Mondani.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm not trying to make fun of his name.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a fun name to say.
[SPEAKER_01]: If I say it like if I say it in a white lady accent, it's Zoran Mam Danny.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, looks like he's got, he's going to, to win the mayor's race, uh, voting is today.
[SPEAKER_01]: I asked my friend who lives full time in New York and he said, usually it only takes about a day or two to announce the winners.
[SPEAKER_01]: But he is looking on track to win and boy are, um, the billionaires and Republicans freaking the fuck out.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, it's not good when the Republicans are siding with Andrew Cuomo.
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
[SPEAKER_01]: That guy who probably can't be alone with a woman in an elevator legally.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, lots are coming out and kind of, uh, flailing about, freaking the fuck out at this, at this socialist, democratic, socialist who's gonna win, who wants to help the people of New York.
[SPEAKER_01]: My favorite is that all of these rich people are like, oh, Dave Portnoy included.
[SPEAKER_01]: That fucking freak.
[SPEAKER_01]: Dave Portnoy can't stay off of his goddamn tippy toes.
[SPEAKER_01]: like the the jiggas up like just get down on your feet bitch we know your short why are you still i just saw another a video of him next to rob gone calisky great titan for the patriots former titan uh grunk and he's on his fucking tippy toes in the video it's like who are you fooling it's okay to be a short king you're a millionaire a multi-multime millionaire just be short okay i'm surprised he's not doing that leg lengthening shit
[SPEAKER_01]: He came out and was like, wow, I wish I could leave New York City.
[SPEAKER_01]: If Zoron's going to win, oh, I'm just going to, you know, it's like, dude, chill the fuck out.
[SPEAKER_01]: The guy just wants to help people who knows how successful, successful, he'll be in actually helping.
[SPEAKER_01]: New Yorkers.
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, it's a lot of red tape.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's not like you can just I'm sure that he can't deliver on all of his promises, you know, a lot of them are very lofty promises free public transportation and and allocated budgets for from like the police force to like feeding people and it's all really wishful thinking, but I want him to win.
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, dude, New Yorkers deserve somebody who's not he's not out there just being a sex pest Andrew Cuomo.
[SPEAKER_01]: who handled COVID horribly wrong, lots are coming out obviously Donald Trump came out and said, you know, what did Trump say?
[SPEAKER_01]: Trump, you know, he first is around as a communist.
[SPEAKER_01]: He said he would be the worst man in history.
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, this is obvious.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, the best one is Texas Governor Greg Abbott.
[SPEAKER_01]: That fucking governor Hot Wheels.
[SPEAKER_01]: He's a governor in a wheelchair and he bullies the entire state of Texas.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's kind of very funny.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now I like a lot of Texas.
[SPEAKER_01]: I like Austin.
[SPEAKER_01]: Uh, you know, I really, Houston's, Houston's fine.
[SPEAKER_01]: Dallas is fine.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know.
[SPEAKER_01]: I've never been called to a city really other than Austin and even Austin.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's like, alright.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, but you know, it's just very funny that this man is in a wheelchair.
[SPEAKER_01]: And it's just bullying the fuck out of people's rights, gay people, women, trans people.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, you know, and nobody does anything, nobody just rolls him off a cliff.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know what we're doing.
[SPEAKER_01]: When you're, you know, this guy, he's insane.
[SPEAKER_01]: He came out, not gay.
[SPEAKER_01]: He rolled out, sorry.
[SPEAKER_01]: He rolled out.
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, if Greg Abbott were to come out, he'd have to roll out of the closet.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's so fun.
[SPEAKER_01]: Anyways.
[SPEAKER_01]: Texas Governor Greg Abbott promised he promised to place a 100% tariff on any New Yorker who tries to flee the Big Apple, should social is so around Mom Donnie when the mayor's race Tuesday.
[SPEAKER_01]: He said after the polls closed tomorrow night, I will impose a 100% tariff on anyone moving to Texas from New York City.
[SPEAKER_01]: First of all, we're not products
[SPEAKER_01]: of a very large state, a state that could be its own country, it's like California, it's huge.
[SPEAKER_01]: It takes 10 hours to drive out of Texas if you start from the south to north.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's fucking disgusting.
[SPEAKER_01]: I used to live in Texas, so I feel like I can roast them a bit.
[SPEAKER_01]: I have personal experience.
[SPEAKER_01]: We're not, we're not iPhones.
[SPEAKER_01]: People are not iPhones.
[SPEAKER_01]: You can't place a tariff on us.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't even know how his plan would work.
[SPEAKER_01]: Like a moving tax, a move out of a move-in tax, maybe.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't really know beyond that, it's logically,
[SPEAKER_01]: He's a moron, it doesn't make any sense logically.
[SPEAKER_01]: That you want to tax the people who are fleeing New York because or on Mamdaani won.
[SPEAKER_01]: Those would be called Pussy Republicans.
[SPEAKER_01]: So you want to tax your own people for fleeing New York City in the socialist regime of Zoran Mamdaani?
[SPEAKER_01]: Also, why do you give a fuck about New York?
[SPEAKER_01]: I thought that's where, you know, it's just liberal losers.
[SPEAKER_01]: Why do you give a fuck about New York City?
[SPEAKER_01]: These people are shaking in their boots.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're shaking in their chairs.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're shaking in their wheelchairs.
[SPEAKER_01]: They are, they don't like to see any glimmer of hope for the people.
[SPEAKER_01]: And really, their only way is to punish.
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, one of you seen a Republican leader not lead with harm.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're always leading with how can I harm, instead of how can I help?
[SPEAKER_01]: And that goes for most politicians, honestly.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's never how can I help.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's always how can I harm.
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay, well, if York is going to like Zoroan, that I'm going to tax people who decide to move here, I'm going to punish people who live in my state.
[SPEAKER_01]: That you're in insane moron, dude.
[SPEAKER_01]: You're in insane moron, and I'm glad you're paralyzed.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know how he got paralyzed, too?
[SPEAKER_01]: A fucking tree fell on him while he was running.
[SPEAKER_01]: If God is real, he does not like you, sir.
[SPEAKER_01]: If God is real, he does not like you.
[SPEAKER_01]: You are a DEI higher by the way, you little handy cap freak.
[SPEAKER_01]: God, he's like evil, little roller.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I don't think anybody, and I really don't see anybody backing up their claim of leaving New York City of Zoran gets elected.
[SPEAKER_01]: The reason you live in New York City is if you live there and you stuck through it and you're there, you're not leaving.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, New York City is the biggest city in the country.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's the best city in the country.
[SPEAKER_01]: So much going on.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a beautiful city.
[SPEAKER_01]: If you love being in a large city You're you love being in your city.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't think that a lot of people are gonna pack up and leave to head for the green Pastures of Texas where rights are not a you know rights are an option there if you're a white straight male You get some rights But beyond that it's like yeah, no and you are he get all the rights
[SPEAKER_01]: You get all the rights in New York, you think we're gonna leave that to go live in fucking hell and in literal hell throughout the summer Do you know hot Texas gets in the summer fuck outta here dude?
[SPEAKER_01]: Greg Abbott is a piece of work, he, you know, he doesn't help his people.
[SPEAKER_01]: When you've all the shooting happened, he said it could have been a lot worse.
[SPEAKER_01]: Could it have a lot of kids died?
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know!
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, while many states currently have an exit tax for leaving, they do not currently have any sort of moving tax for those arriving.
[SPEAKER_01]: Why would you want to tax people that are coming into your state in, you know, contributing to your economy and your workforce?
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know.
[SPEAKER_01]: Weird.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, they're just scared.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're shaking in their chairs.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's very fun to see.
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's see.
[SPEAKER_01]: Is there anything?
[SPEAKER_01]: And that was Greg Abbott, we did that out.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm trying to see, oh, here's what Trump said.
[SPEAKER_01]: Trump said that, I mean, anything, Trump says is just a complete lie.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, Donald Trump says New Yorkers must vote for Andrew Cuomo.
[SPEAKER_01]: I love that rapists sticking up for rapists.
[SPEAKER_01]: Don't you love when rapists get together and have each other's backs?
[SPEAKER_01]: It's like a warm hug from Satan.
[SPEAKER_01]: President Trump encouraged voters to backformer New York Governor Andrew Cuomo in tomorrow's New York City mayoral election making the endorsement hours after Tesla chief Elon Musk Elon Musk did the same thing last minute push against Zoron
[SPEAKER_01]: Trump said whether you personally like Andrew Cuomo or not, you really have no choice.
[SPEAKER_01]: You must vote for him and hope he does fantastic job.
[SPEAKER_01]: Musk must copped on X, the place he owns and paid for a promoted post that urged his followers to vote Cuomo and all caps vote Cuomo.
[SPEAKER_01]: He also said a vote for Sliwa, the Republican candidate is really a vote for Mumbdani or whatever his name is, right?
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, so he's a very fun guy.
[SPEAKER_01]: He doesn't know what he's talking about, listen to me, but I don't even know who the fucking candidate's name is.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, the glides comedy, vote for Mumbdani or whatever his name is.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know, you must vote Cuomo.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, he's like, he's like, he's like a, he's like a, he's like a very gay nosporatu.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now I'm going to say this, I'm going to say this.
[SPEAKER_01]: If a billionaire is telling you to do one thing, you want to do the opposite, because the billionaire doesn't have your best interest at heart.
[SPEAKER_01]: OK, you should not be looking to a billionaire for how to enrich your own life.
[SPEAKER_01]: They don't want to enrich your life.
[SPEAKER_01]: They want to suck the life out of you.
[SPEAKER_01]: They want to take your soul and sell it on the market.
[SPEAKER_01]: Don't, I would never go to a billionaire and be like, how should I vote?
[SPEAKER_01]: Because I know you have my best interest.
[SPEAKER_01]: yeah it makes sense uh... fuckelin muskies such a loser i just saw him on uh... joe rogan and he was butchering jokes if you can watch it pull it up on tiktok he is he's telling jokes that he just retelling really bad first of all the really bad jokes but he's telling them in such an awful way he is so cringy and bad at comedy
[SPEAKER_01]: And it's like, all he wants in life, but you can't buy the skills to be good at comedy.
[SPEAKER_01]: You just can't.
[SPEAKER_01]: He can take comedy classes.
[SPEAKER_01]: Sure.
[SPEAKER_01]: He can go bomb at the laugh factory in LA.
[SPEAKER_01]: But you just can't really, with that kind of, you know, low grade autism that he has and evenness that's seeping through his blood, he can't be funny.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's just not something he's going to have.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know what I mean?
[SPEAKER_01]: So,
[SPEAKER_01]: like he can get hairplugs and get hair, he can revive his hairline, but he's never going to be able to naturally be a funny person, and it's the one thing that's going to drive him crazy, he wants to be so funny, he wants to be Shane Gillis.
[SPEAKER_01]: Hell, he'll even be Joe Rogan.
[SPEAKER_01]: Joe Rogan's barely funny.
[SPEAKER_01]: Joe Rogan's very successful and has a great acumen of like the future and you know Joe Rogan got into podcasting first and that's why he's the most successful and he's very good at it but Joe Rogan's not the funniest.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't think anybody would be arguing with that.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't I don't go to Joe Rogan stand-up clips when I need a giggle you know and I mean but I will pull up Elon Musk being unintentionally horrifically unfunny and that will make me giggle.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's the one thing he'll never be able to be, is funny, because money can buy him anything, except to real love and an ability to be naturally funny.
[SPEAKER_01]: So good, at least we have that.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, if you're a funny person like me, we have something that Elon Musk could never own.
[SPEAKER_01]: Isn't that nice?
[SPEAKER_01]: Also, if you have a loving family, people that love you,
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, and if you're clean off ketamine, you've never done it, or you just don't do it anymore.
[SPEAKER_01]: Guess what?
[SPEAKER_01]: You're a way ahead of Elon Musk.
[SPEAKER_01]: Fuck his billions of dollars, you're winning over him.
[SPEAKER_01]: What's going on with Erica Kirk?
[SPEAKER_01]: What's going on with air cooker?
[SPEAKER_01]: By the way, there are 3K's in Erica Kirk's name.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm just going to let you know about that.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know if you knew that, but that's such a great... That's just a great metaphor for what's going on with her.
[SPEAKER_01]: There are 3K's in her name.
[SPEAKER_01]: J.D.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vance in Erica Kirk had a very warm hug at a turning point event.
[SPEAKER_01]: And I got to say it looks like they're fucking.
[SPEAKER_01]: It looks like they are getting three pumps in that push and disappointing her.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, when she's letting it happen because he's the vice president who wears eyeliner, they're fucking.
[SPEAKER_01]: The way she put her hand on his head, holy shit, he's seen the inside of her guts.
[SPEAKER_01]: Boy, oh boy, Erica Kirk is wearing too much God damn makeup.
[SPEAKER_01]: She reminds me of, you know, Millennials in the early 2000s, mid 2000s.
[SPEAKER_01]: Way too much makeup cake down.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think she's a millennial, it checks out.
[SPEAKER_01]: I saw a video of Erica Kirk preparing to go out on stage at one of these turning point events.
[SPEAKER_01]: And she had what theater actors have.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a stick that you kind of put under your eyes and your nose.
[SPEAKER_01]: And it makes you tear up.
[SPEAKER_01]: So, you know, if you're on a player, something and you need some help with TRIs or to get the tears going, you smell this thing.
[SPEAKER_01]: You put it on your eyes, it burns, I don't know if it burns, but it activates like, ooh.
[SPEAKER_01]: And you start to tear up and she was doing that right before she went on stage.
[SPEAKER_01]: No, it was not AI.
[SPEAKER_01]: Shut your trap, you probably weren't even saying that.
[SPEAKER_01]: So it's really good that she really cares.
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, she cares so much about looking like she cares.
[SPEAKER_01]: She is really concerned in making sure that you believe she cares.
[SPEAKER_01]: And that's a good actress.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's going to sell it.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's going to really get that stick under her nose so that the tears start to fall, because they're not going to fall on their own.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's actually relieved.
[SPEAKER_01]: She doesn't have to be a Ron Charlie Kirk anymore.
[SPEAKER_01]: God, he was a snooze fest.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I don't know.
[SPEAKER_01]: It kind of just seems a little too intimate this hug.
[SPEAKER_01]: You can Google a picture if you'd like.
[SPEAKER_01]: Maybe it'll be the cover of this episode for YouTube.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't ever have a lot of people.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't ever put my hand on the back of their head as I bring them in closer.
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean that is she's been railed by the vansman.
[SPEAKER_01]: I bet you know what?
[SPEAKER_01]: She probably dressed up as a couch for Halloween and he just couldn't keep her as hands-offer.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know what I mean?
[SPEAKER_01]: It was like always shit.
[SPEAKER_01]: Even I'm wet.
[SPEAKER_01]: It just seemed a little odd.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a little odd, Erica Kirk.
[SPEAKER_01]: who was really, unless you were like super in determining points, super in the Charlie Kirk, you didn't really know about Erica Kirk.
[SPEAKER_01]: I knew about Charlie Kirk.
[SPEAKER_01]: I never knew about Erica Kirk.
[SPEAKER_01]: I didn't know he was married, I didn't even know he had kids.
[SPEAKER_01]: I was a very, very, very peripheral follower of Charlie Kirk.
[SPEAKER_01]: And I even follow, I just knew of his existence, but I didn't really,
[SPEAKER_01]: But man, now it's like everybody knows who Erica Kirk is.
[SPEAKER_01]: She can't stay away from the goddamn spotlight.
[SPEAKER_01]: Holy shit, her husband's death is the best thing that's ever happened to her.
[SPEAKER_01]: Clearly, I mean, Jesus.
[SPEAKER_01]: And a lot of viewers say, well, she wants to keep turning point in life.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think a lot of other people could have done that for her.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, it's interesting, she does seem like she's getting passed around a lot from all these politicians.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm not saying they're all banging, but Trump in that hug that he had, Yelikes, J.D.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vance, you know, I think she's been, she's just been hugging a lot, Tucker Carlson.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's been hugging a lot of these men.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's only the men, too.
[SPEAKER_01]: You never see her having an embrace with Marjorie Taylor Green.
[SPEAKER_01]: I guess she's not bisexual, that would be against God's plan.
[SPEAKER_01]: But boy, that hug did look intimate.
[SPEAKER_01]: His hands were on her waist.
[SPEAKER_01]: Dude, if I was JD Vance's wife, I'd be drafting up those divorce papers so fast.
[SPEAKER_01]: Ushavance!
[SPEAKER_01]: Ushavance is, you know, she's, she married J.D.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vance, so she's not, she's not a saint, but you know, she, uh, she put a little concern.
[SPEAKER_01]: They have three kids together.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's, she's Hindu, and uh, it's just interesting that he married her and then just joined the white supremacist side, the real white supremacist side.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm sure she didn't fall for white supremacist.
[SPEAKER_01]: Maybe
[SPEAKER_01]: I think that he's kind of changed.
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, you know, a couple years ago, not Charlie Kirk's already.
[SPEAKER_01]: J.D.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vance.
[SPEAKER_01]: A couple years ago, J.D.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vance was talking about our Trump's evil and now he's his vice president.
[SPEAKER_01]: So I think, again, like most politicians, he has no, there's no integrity.
[SPEAKER_01]: There's no, it's like an actor.
[SPEAKER_01]: They don't who they are.
[SPEAKER_01]: Just tell him who they are and tell him how to win and then they'll be that.
[SPEAKER_01]: But man, Ushia looks like rough.
[SPEAKER_01]: She looks rough, dude.
[SPEAKER_01]: Since, if you look at pictures of Ushia, Vance from one before, you know, before J.D.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vance was running.
[SPEAKER_01]: Look three years ago, four years ago, and you look at her now.
[SPEAKER_01]: She has aged worse than any sitting president in an office after a full term.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's aging like a white woman.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's so upsetting.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't even like this bitch.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know what I mean?
[SPEAKER_01]: She married J.D.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vance, she gets what she gets.
[SPEAKER_01]: She went along with this bullshit.
[SPEAKER_01]: Dude, if I married somebody thinking they were somebody, they were one way, and then they came out and said, actually I'm gonna be on the ticket with Donald Trump, you wouldn't see me still married to them.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'd say, okay, I'll see you later, you freak.
[SPEAKER_01]: She stayed with him.
[SPEAKER_01]: So I don't have any sympathy for her, but man, she is aging like milk laid out in the sun, bitch.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's aging like, oh, what?
[SPEAKER_01]: She's aging like me.
[SPEAKER_01]: She shouldn't be aging like me.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's crazy.
[SPEAKER_01]: I would be real concerned if I was use of ants.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, because J.D.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vance is definitely hitting it.
[SPEAKER_01]: He's definitely hitting it with Erica Kirk.
[SPEAKER_01]: And then just kind of, I don't know.
[SPEAKER_01]: Maybe he's eye-filtowered here with Trump.
[SPEAKER_01]: I could see that.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, here's a body language expert's think about that hug between J.D.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vance and Erica Kirk with 3K's in her name.
[SPEAKER_01]: So basically, if you haven't seen it and you don't want to look it up, I'll explain it.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're seeing hugging tightly with their bodies pressed up against each other.
[SPEAKER_01]: At one point, Kirk brings her hand up to Vance's hair and when the hug eventually ends, Vance's hand drops to Kirk's hip, touching her in a very intimate way.
[SPEAKER_01]: If I touch somebody that way, yeah, in my fiancee saw it, I think I'd get beat up and rightfully so.
[SPEAKER_01]: Experts say Erica Kirk's hand placement in J.D.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vance's hair is super intimate, comfortable, and attention-controlling.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, she's like gripping the back of his head, like running your fingers through his hair.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's fucking weird, dude.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a super intimate mood.
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay, so this is a Tracy Brown, a body language expert, and behavior analyst said.
[SPEAKER_01]: That is a super intimate move, but beyond that, it controls his attention, so she's controlling what he's looking at.
[SPEAKER_01]: And she goes on, and the hug also, they're pressed up against each other.
[SPEAKER_01]: He's smiling and the little creme de la creme on the sexual aspect of that interaction besides the pelvic placement, is she's running their hands through his hair.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's got his hands inside of his hair.
[SPEAKER_01]: She got her hands inside of his hair, and if you look at the fingers, there's a tightening, there's a curling around the fingers, meaning she's pulling him closer.
[SPEAKER_01]: grow, it's dude.
[SPEAKER_01]: Ew, he's definitely seen her butthole.
[SPEAKER_01]: Ew.
[SPEAKER_01]: This suggests or signals that she's comfortable and there's some type of familiarity there.
[SPEAKER_01]: He's familiar to her as well.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, they were just, you know, they were just humping in the fucking air force one.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't even think fans is allowed on the air force one.
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's be real.
[SPEAKER_01]: They were humping in a closet.
[SPEAKER_01]: That turning point closet.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vance didn't pull away from her embrace and his facial expressions are positive so he's into it his hand strapped to her hips and that is not formal and that is in many instances not appropriate however it's what they're doing these people don't give a fuck dude they're just running around doing whoever the fuck they want they think this is their country it is for now but wait until the reckoning mother fucker you guys aren't gonna be an office forever jaddy vance and ten years is gonna be like you know a woke fucking dry queen i'm telling you
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, it's so gross.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's so Iki.
[SPEAKER_01]: Iki kaka.
[SPEAKER_01]: All right, the last thing for getting into the ad reads, I want to talk about is Britney Spears, a bo-edney.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's Britney Bets.
[SPEAKER_01]: Britney deleted her Instagram account once again.
[SPEAKER_01]: After making headlines for her erratic behavior that reportedly sparked serious concern for her family, if her family cared so much, they wouldn't stop.
[SPEAKER_01]: They wouldn't try to take all of her money through a conservatorship, but those are just my thoughts.
[SPEAKER_01]: Britney Spears I never was comfortable looking at her Instagram the comments are turned off So there's really you can't see what everybody else is thinking.
[SPEAKER_01]: There's a lot of people that like the posts Sometimes liking a post that is unsettling is a weird feeling It's almost like if your friend were posting like well, Lee and Billy are getting divorced like liking it is weird unless you're super hate Billy
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, or if somebody shares something very intimate, you know, my grandma was the best she died.
[SPEAKER_01]: I miss her so much liking it is like it's showing your support, but it's also like, well, I'm liking a dead lady.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's weird.
[SPEAKER_01]: I never really liked Britney Spears posts.
[SPEAKER_01]: I personally liked them, but I wasn't going in smashing that heart.
[SPEAKER_01]: It just felt a little achy.
[SPEAKER_01]: It felt a little exploitative.
[SPEAKER_01]: I felt like she wasn't in her right mind.
[SPEAKER_01]: She isn't in her right mind.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think that we can say this and it's not us.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's not me roasting Britney Spears for calling out what is so obvious.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm observing.
[SPEAKER_01]: I have two eyes.
[SPEAKER_01]: Sumi.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm not here roasting her and saying what I'm just saying she's clearly unwell.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know what's causing it.
[SPEAKER_01]: Who the fuck knows?
[SPEAKER_01]: Do you?
[SPEAKER_01]: No.
[SPEAKER_01]: We have our speculations.
[SPEAKER_01]: Is it long-term medication use that she's abruptly stopped?
[SPEAKER_01]: Is it, you know, has she just had a psych, like a psychotic break?
[SPEAKER_01]: A lot like a man to binds.
[SPEAKER_01]: You're looking at a man to binds and you're like, who is that?
[SPEAKER_01]: Things happen.
[SPEAKER_01]: These people have been in the industry since they were children.
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay, clearly the industry harms people, especially women.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, even Bieber was, is not safe, you know, he got passed around like Erica Kirk.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, so, you know, I'm just observing here when I say that she's clearly not been well.
[SPEAKER_01]: Her post do not make sense.
[SPEAKER_01]: Her captions are rambly and rancy and giving manic episode.
[SPEAKER_01]: And that's fine.
[SPEAKER_01]: I understand why she's mentally unwell.
[SPEAKER_01]: I totally get it.
[SPEAKER_01]: But we can't sit here and be like, she's just living her life.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's finally free.
[SPEAKER_01]: Let her be.
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, no, we need to be like this.
[SPEAKER_01]: Maybe we shouldn't have an Instagram account.
[SPEAKER_01]: I wish she had somebody in her life that loved her for who she was and not for who she is to the public and her money, her dad's evil, put her in the conservatorship, siphoned money off of her Kate Fed is a fucking carny that somehow got close to her and had kids with her and got lucky.
[SPEAKER_01]: One, the carny lottery by being with her, he's a fucking
[SPEAKER_01]: He deserves to be managing a game stop in Alabama.
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay, he doesn't deserve to be Britney Spears' ex with two sons with her.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's fucking nuts.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's when I knew Britney was not saying when she was like having a better line.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes, please.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, he's got a new memoir out.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's bullshit.
[SPEAKER_01]: Uh, the memoir is called, you thought you knew.
[SPEAKER_01]: Bitch, we did know.
[SPEAKER_01]: We did know.
[SPEAKER_01]: You're a charity case, mother fucker.
[SPEAKER_01]: Sit the fuck down now that you don't get child support every month from Britney Spears and now you want to make money Girl, where were you when you wanted it?
[SPEAKER_01]: You didn't want to job ten years ago, bitch You just sit around smoke cigarettes and fucking play put put golf Please fuck off
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm glad she's deleted the Instagram, the captions were weird, it didn't make sense, they were rambly, I mean, it would be so long, it'd be random emojis, I'm telling you, I'm telling you, I'm not trying to be mean, but if you saw your sister or your mother or your close female friend or your aunt, start posting videos like Britney Spears is posting and captions like Britney Spears was posting.
[SPEAKER_01]: Would you reach out to them and say, hey, are you okay or would you just go, hmm, she just
[SPEAKER_01]: A close friend of yours, a sister, your mother, your aunt, your girlfriend, your wife.
[SPEAKER_01]: Some women close to you in your life.
[SPEAKER_01]: You see them start posting like Britney Spears, and you don't, you don't, not a cause for concern on that.
[SPEAKER_01]: You think that, no, it's not normal.
[SPEAKER_01]: So people are allowed to say Britney's not okay.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's not us hating on her.
[SPEAKER_01]: I want the best of Britney Spears, she's clearly not okay.
[SPEAKER_01]: We just got to call it what it is.
[SPEAKER_01]: But her captions were very funny.
[SPEAKER_01]: She would just be going off on tangents.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, holy shit.
[SPEAKER_00]: Did you know that the second president of the United States was actually a giraffe?
[SPEAKER_00]: That is crazy.
[SPEAKER_00]: Wack of Doodle, woo, woo, woo.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know.
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's see, let's read a Britney Spears caption.
[SPEAKER_01]: They were, I don't know what she was talking about.
[SPEAKER_01]: A lot of times she'd be talking about her experience somewhere.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's very funny, like when she was more, you know, put together in more in the public eye.
[SPEAKER_01]: She was always very funny.
[SPEAKER_01]: I always thought that she was a very funny person.
[SPEAKER_01]: But, you know, like some of these posts are just really rambling.
[SPEAKER_00]: Uh, 13 was the age.
[SPEAKER_00]: I actually felt kind of pretty.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think my rebellious days were due to the fact that I always had to be perfect and pretty emoji.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I went to the extremes and went wild and naughty.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, it just goes on and on.
[SPEAKER_00]: My confidence, my swag, my inner dialogue, and yes, even my sex life.
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, it's just on, I mean, and that's just two sentences of these, there's not, actually isn't a breakup of sentences.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's all just a rant ramble.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's giving manic or meth or,
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, a psychotic break and I would also break to if I had Britney's life.
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
[SPEAKER_01]: If I was treated the way she was a prisoner.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's literally the black mirror episode with my least Iris, you know, um, and that's just what it is.
[SPEAKER_01]: So I, I'm glad that she's off the internet.
[SPEAKER_01]: I know that comments were not on her post, so it wasn't like she had to deal with people being like, you know, bullying the fuck out of her being really rude.
[SPEAKER_01]: If her comments were not, I never would have commented and been like, oh, well, Brittany, what the fuck is it?
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, I never would have commented anyways in support or in roasting her in any way.
[SPEAKER_01]: But I think it's a good move.
[SPEAKER_01]: Apparently people have said that she does this, she goes offline, she goes back online.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think she should just get a burner account.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't think she needs to be posting anything about her life.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, we've had access to Britney Spears' life since she was like 12.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think that it's time for us to not have access anymore.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't think we need it.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, I don't think it's healthy for her.
[SPEAKER_01]: Uh, it's not productive.
[SPEAKER_01]: And she's also not a fucking clone.
[SPEAKER_01]: Can people stop with this?
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, this is the Illuminati.
[SPEAKER_01]: They cloned Brittany and made her a fucking whack.
[SPEAKER_01]: I do.
[SPEAKER_01]: If the Illuminati cloned Brittany Spears, they would make her, uh, able to perform fort shows a night and the Las Vegas residency so that they could print money off of her fucking name image and likeness bitch.
[SPEAKER_01]: They wouldn't have made a clone of Britney Spears just doing nothing but twirling in her fucking kitchen with knives.
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay, shut the fuck up.
[SPEAKER_01]: Go read a book for once, please.
[SPEAKER_01]: Any book?
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't can't in the hat, mother fucker.
[SPEAKER_01]: Green eggs and ham, just read.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, a manager at Red O restaurant in Wesley, California, who attended to Spears and her friend before the toxic hit singer got by the wheel.
[SPEAKER_01]: Am I missing a plot here?
[SPEAKER_01]: What am I talking about?
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, the pop stars surprising social media move comes after she was film swirving dangerously while driving herself home after a night out with a female friend late last night.
[SPEAKER_01]: At one point, Spears' black convertible crossed the road's center divider in a video of 10 to by Page 6, well, why aren't we stopping here from driving?
[SPEAKER_01]: Please, we don't need her driving.
[SPEAKER_01]: The manager said she was not intoxicated while dining at the upstale restaurant, she was super chill and really nice, who was just kind of hung out, grabbed it by to eat and left.
[SPEAKER_01]: The manager said I was impressed at how nice she actually was.
[SPEAKER_01]: She seems like a very nice, sweet person.
[SPEAKER_01]: I worked at other restaurants, frequented by a lot of celebrities.
[SPEAKER_01]: And I've never really seen this celebrity be as nice as per anyone's.
[SPEAKER_01]: She later appeared to give her Instagram followers a bizarre excuse for her erratic driving, what was that, an excuse?
[SPEAKER_00]: If anyone is wondering, the look-alike was not me.
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay, so she's going with it was, it was a look-alike.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's not a bad excuse.
[SPEAKER_01]: Hey, she may have all her marbles.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's a good excuse.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, holy shit, that was an impersonator.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would never get behind the wheel ever.
[SPEAKER_00]: I forgot how to drive.
[SPEAKER_00]: I lost my feet.
[SPEAKER_01]: Still, the video of Spears wandering into other car lanes reportedly terrified her loved ones who compared her behavior to her antics ahead of her 2007 breakdown.
[SPEAKER_01]: Gee, I wonder why she's breaking down.
[SPEAKER_01]: Gee, you forced her to work her fucking face off for 20 years.
[SPEAKER_01]: Gee.
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, I don't know.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't think her parents have her best interests at her.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't think her sister does.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't think she has anybody close to her.
[SPEAKER_01]: Everybody is failed her in one way or another.
[SPEAKER_01]: They see her as just a money printing machine and they have failed her.
[SPEAKER_01]: And I am always thinking of Brittany and I want her to get healthy and well and live the life that she wants to live whether that be in seclusion or in the public eye.
[SPEAKER_01]: And fuck Kevin Fetterline for his memoir.
[SPEAKER_01]: No one cares about where you came from bitch Why don't you go back to that place?
[SPEAKER_01]: Crawl under that fucking rock and rock bitch We don't need a goddamn 12 page memoir Kevin Fetterline telling us about your stupid fucking life Your life began the minute you you got pregnant with Britney Spears.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's when your life began And your life ended when you left Britney Spears when you guys divorced boom.
[SPEAKER_01]: There's the fucking memoir
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't need a three-minute audio book of your stupid ass men want memoir bitch got me all choked up can't even talk right He's profiting off of her fucking all right, let's get into our sponsors for the show shall we?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Well, she- I love talking like, God, R.I.P.
[SPEAKER_01]: Leslie Jordan.
[SPEAKER_01]: What a fucking- what a- I wish he was around for TikTok.
[SPEAKER_01]: Remember, in COVID, Leslie Jordan was just a fucking light.
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, she- what do y'all do in screwing?
[SPEAKER_01]: I love him.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think it's been three years since his death.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm not sure.
[SPEAKER_01]: They could- it just happened.
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, the anniversary came up and God, I miss him.
[SPEAKER_01]: God, I miss him.
[SPEAKER_01]: What
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, the sexiest man alive has been released.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think this is a people thing, right?
[SPEAKER_01]: People does this every year and pretends that the general public cares.
[SPEAKER_01]: For the first time ever, the sexiest man alive is an openly gay actor in 2025.
[SPEAKER_01]: Progress, baby, it is fitting.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's nice, it's Tuesday.
[SPEAKER_01]: What's gonna happen on Tuesday?
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, Dick Cheney died, he's no longer breathing.
[SPEAKER_01]: Zoron Mamdoni is about to be elected mayor of New York City and then an openly gay actor is the sexiest man alive.
[SPEAKER_01]: Hey, hey, we're getting progress where we can okay Trump's approval rating is in the fucking toilet But at least we're doing progress where we can Jonathan Bailey.
[SPEAKER_01]: He was in Wicked.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's how I know him I watched Wicked and I saw him I didn't know he was gay at the time But when I was watching Wicked I said that's a faggot I can't prove it, but I know that's a faggot and then turns out he was a gay man I love him so much I don't really know him, but I'm just trying to make it seem like I'm not hate-crimey and for being gay Jonathan Bailey
[SPEAKER_01]: sexiest man alive first openly gay one to which you know keyword here openly so I wanted to go through the past list and and let's go through and see what other gay men have greased the sexiest man alive cover that's just not openly gay because he is not the first gay one okay bitch he's just the first openly gay one
[SPEAKER_01]: All right, so we're going to start when it started, uh, we're going to start in 1985.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's when it started.
[SPEAKER_01]: So Mel Gibson definitely not gay, Mark Carmen.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't think he's gay.
[SPEAKER_01]: Harry Hamlin, man, I don't think he's gay.
[SPEAKER_01]: John F. Kennedy, he's probably by.
[SPEAKER_01]: He was probably a by-queen.
[SPEAKER_01]: He'd probably really into trans women right now if he was still alive.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, he's he's fluid, Sean Connery.
[SPEAKER_01]: No, he's straightened a monster.
[SPEAKER_01]: 1990 Tom Cruise ding ding ding ding it only took them five years to get to the first gay actor Tom Cruise Tom Cruise is the first gay actor to be people's sexiest I don't want to hear all this any of this Tom Cruise is straight you shut your horn mouth he's gay All right this is all legend Patrick Swazie no, but very comfortable in his sexuality not be offended if he said he was gay Nick Nolty now he likes to dream that pussy up
[SPEAKER_01]: Richard Gear, I don't know, he maybe could swing a little by, but I don't think he's gay.
[SPEAKER_01]: Counter-reef, straight, Brad Pitt, straight, but I think he would go gay if like he was so struggling actor, he would suck dick for a part.
[SPEAKER_01]: Denzel Washington's straightest can be, but very, very, very secure in himself, George Clooney.
[SPEAKER_01]: think he's a little gay.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think George Clooney's a little gay and I love George Clooney.
[SPEAKER_01]: I love George Clooney, but honey.
[SPEAKER_01]: Honey, chew chew boo boo.
[SPEAKER_01]: That might be a big game.
[SPEAKER_01]: Alright Harrison Ford, Richard Gear, Brad Pitt, we're going through it again.
[SPEAKER_01]: Pierce Bros. and we're going to get in 2002, Ben Affleck, no Johnny Depp, no Jude Law, no Mathematon A, no George Clooney, hmm?
[SPEAKER_01]: Matt Damon, I don't think so.
[SPEAKER_01]: 2008 Hugh Jackman Holy shit talk about a faggot that guy in 2008 they had their second uh... gay man grace the sexiest uh... men so it's time crews and now he'll jackman we're going with absolute gay men so time crews Hugh Jackman all right so already two thousand were making progress here
[SPEAKER_01]: Then it wasn't in 2009, Johnny Depp, no, Ryan Reynolds, god, no.
[SPEAKER_01]: Bradley Cooper, 2011, we got another gay guy, Bradley Cooper, sexiest gay man alive.
[SPEAKER_01]: Alright, so we're up to three, since 85, not bad.
[SPEAKER_01]: Alright, 2012, Channing Tatum, no, Adam Levine, no, Chris Hemsworth, no, David Beckham, no, Dwayne the Rock Johnson, I don't think so.
[SPEAKER_01]: Blake Shelton, no, god, he- you know Blake Shelton does not wipe his ass.
[SPEAKER_01]: You just know he's got skid marks for days on man underwear, got he's so straight.
[SPEAKER_01]: Eat yourself, but no, but very secure.
[SPEAKER_01]: John legend.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know John seems a little gay, but I don't know.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know too much about John legend to know if he's like, you know, pet getting pegged or blown a guy.
[SPEAKER_01]: So we're going to say no on that one.
[SPEAKER_01]: Michael, be Jordan.
[SPEAKER_01]: No.
[SPEAKER_01]: 2021.
[SPEAKER_01]: Paul Rudd.
[SPEAKER_01]: No.
[SPEAKER_01]: Chris Evans.
[SPEAKER_01]: No.
[SPEAKER_01]: Patrick Dempsey.
[SPEAKER_01]: No.
[SPEAKER_01]: He got that in 2023.
[SPEAKER_01]: What was he doing in 2023 that they were like, yeah, let's do it to Patrick Dempsey.
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay, this is why sexy as men alive is falling off because 2023 was 2023 was Patrick Debussy, then 2024 is John Krasinski, he's not gay.
[SPEAKER_01]: Why are all these people, it's just, this is just PR.
[SPEAKER_01]: You just, you just, that was it.
[SPEAKER_01]: To those of ours, John's cousin's key.
[SPEAKER_01]: And then Johnathan Bailey this year.
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, so probably three to four gay men before Johnathan Bailey, but Johnathan Bailey is the first one to come out, bitch, or to be openly out.
[SPEAKER_01]: But really the first one, Deborah Grace, it was Tom Cruise, that fucking queen.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's Scientologist queen.
[SPEAKER_01]: Congratulations to Jonathan Bailey.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's clearly an honor that is awarded by your publicist.
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, if Patrick Dempsey and John Krasinski won the last two years, that's clearly just your PR team being like, so how much for the cover?
[SPEAKER_01]: How much will it cost for the sexiest man alive title?
[SPEAKER_01]: We've really got to sell this quiet place too.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, um, it's kind of like the um, like I always am like really supportive of celebrities.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm whispering because they can hear me.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm always really supportive of celebrities who get the Hollywood walk of fame, star, whatever it's called, but that's just but like it's literally just you just submit.
[SPEAKER_01]: Like if you're Drew Barrymore's team, you're just like, okay, she's been an industry for like 20, 20, 30 years.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's awesome.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's really popular now.
[SPEAKER_01]: We're going to submit her and then
[SPEAKER_01]: It's not like the city of Los Angeles.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's like who is this great artist that we should give the star to on the on the shitty Walk of fame that someone's gonna vomit on later that like some street dancing Elmo is going to you know piss on later Like it's just bought for it's kind of like the Forbes most successful under 40 like that's bought for
[SPEAKER_01]: Everything that is prestigious other than I would think you know award shows I think awards Oscars Golden Globes that's more campaigning That's like an election.
[SPEAKER_01]: You can kind of rig it up, but that's bought for I mean, that's probably not the only thing that's not bought for sorry But the Hollywood star Forbes like most successful 40 under 40 You know Sexies may alive these are all just just your PR team reaching out and being like
[SPEAKER_01]: So how, what's the price on that this year?
[SPEAKER_01]: Let me see if we can afford it.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's it.
[SPEAKER_01]: And Jonathan Bailey's got wicked too coming up.
[SPEAKER_01]: So it makes sense for me to be on the cover.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm really glad that they put a gay man, an out gay man on the cover.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's fun.
[SPEAKER_01]: How long till we get a trans man?
[SPEAKER_01]: If this rate, if we got a gay man in 2025, and it's been 85, 95, 05, 15.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's been 40 years since they started this.
[SPEAKER_01]: So it's probably going to be another 40 years until we see a trans man.
[SPEAKER_01]: And it won't be Elliot Page because he'll be too old by then.
[SPEAKER_01]: So it'll have to be another trans man.
[SPEAKER_01]: Another 40 years until we get a trans man.
[SPEAKER_01]: So that's where we're at.
[SPEAKER_01]: Just so you know, okay.
[SPEAKER_01]: The last thing I want to talk about is how awful David Harbour is.
[SPEAKER_01]: God, I have been fucking jamming to Lily Allen's album.
[SPEAKER_01]: If you listen to it as a story where it starts and ends, it starts with West End Girl talking about their move to New York and it kind of slowly devolves into, okay?
[SPEAKER_01]: Well now he said we should be in an open relationship, okay?
[SPEAKER_01]: Well now it's like, I'm trying the open relationship because,
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm confused and like he's like do you want to know what I'm doing and it's like what a weird thing asked me and now I'm like okay now we really need to relapse and numb out because this is like really bothering me and now and now I'm like I'm trying to do everything to save our marriage and it's feeling really weird and now I'm like on the other side of it and I think he's a fucking freak and what the fuck did I get dragged into who the fuck is this man?
[SPEAKER_01]: That's how it ends.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a great album.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's called West End Girl.
[SPEAKER_01]: It'll win all the awards.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a fantastic album, but David Harbour, she really showed his ass.
[SPEAKER_01]: And it doesn't end for this fucking guy.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's so nice when bad people just have to face the consequences because women won't shut up.
[SPEAKER_01]: I fucking love it.
[SPEAKER_01]: guys are so used to women just not saying shit or being not being taken seriously that when women come out and make fucking amazing albums about how your piece of shit and when another actress who works with you comes out and says that your piece of shit people listen they're credible
[SPEAKER_01]: Millie Bobby Brown has allegedly filed a harassment and bully and claim against David Harbor.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, Millie Bobby Brown is the teenager whose Drake was texting.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's had to deal with a lot of shit in this industry.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think she's, let's see how old she is now.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think she's got to be early 20s.
[SPEAKER_01]: She is 21.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's really young.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's 21 years old.
[SPEAKER_01]: So when she was 15, 16, she was on a carpet and innocently mentioned how innocently mentioned how Drake had been texting her.
[SPEAKER_01]: Drake was in his thirties and How you so nice and now he helps me with boys and and you know, just really gross shit.
[SPEAKER_01]: I saw someone on TikTok say it's men will will
[SPEAKER_01]: date 18 year old women girls, let's say home girls, because they're so mature for their their age, but you'll never see a grown man hanging out with an 18 year old boy as friends because they're just so mature for their age.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know what I'm saying?
[SPEAKER_01]: So I'm really about around 21 years old.
[SPEAKER_01]: She had to deal with really a lot of industry bullshit from an early age.
[SPEAKER_01]: Imagine being 16 and having a 30 is something your old loser rapper from Canada
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, and now she's got to deal with, um, David Harber being, uh, I guess just, just being, uh, harassing her, let's, let's pull up the article here and really see what's going on here, because I'm not sure, um, harassment, I'm just googling it now.
[SPEAKER_01]: I will never chat, jbt.
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay, let's see here.
[SPEAKER_01]: Here we go.
[SPEAKER_01]: Stranger Things star, Millie Bobby Brown, filed harassment and bullying claims.
[SPEAKER_01]: Imagine bullying a young girl.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think David Harbour just hates women.
[SPEAKER_01]: There was a point in Millie Allen's album where she got this part for a play in London, and she had to leave New York City to go, and David Harbour was just like,
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, oh, you just got it because your famous usually you'd have to audition.
[SPEAKER_01]: You don't even deserve this role You know what I mean like you didn't earn this role.
[SPEAKER_01]: You didn't even audition like you just got this because of your name It doesn't mean like you're a good actress that kind of vibe right.
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's also look up his note that he left her on her opening night of the play It's really It's really indicative of how he viewed her and Here we go
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it's this one right here.
[SPEAKER_01]: My ambitious wife, where's the note, my other fucker?
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, here it is.
[SPEAKER_01]: He says, the note on her opening night of her play, my ambitious wife, these are bat, as he gave her flowers.
[SPEAKER_01]: These are bad luck flowers, because if you get reviewed well in this play, you will get all kinds of awards and I will be miserable.
[SPEAKER_01]: You're loving husband.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's not even funny, like if you're gonna be like snarking in weird about like dude be funny What?
[SPEAKER_01]: Anyways, okay, let's go back to the baby brown.
[SPEAKER_01]: She filed a lengthy complaint against David Harbour, their co-stars, right?
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't really know.
[SPEAKER_01]: I know she's 11.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't watch Stranger Things, I'm not a fuckin'.
[SPEAKER_01]: I-is just not my thing.
[SPEAKER_01]: If you like Stranger Things, great.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't like to watch shows about kids.
[SPEAKER_01]: Sorry, it's weird.
[SPEAKER_01]: The only one I will watch is pen 15, but those are grown women pretending to be kids.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's different.
[SPEAKER_01]: Brown, who plays 11 Jane Hopper on the hit Netflix series, was said to have included pages and pages of accusations.
[SPEAKER_01]: The news was exclusively reported Saturday.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm trying to get the info, bitch!
[SPEAKER_01]: uh... a person with knowledge of the situation said millie bobby ground filed a harassment and bullying claim that's crazy against a grown ass man like what was he doing i can't wait to find out harbour reportedly faced an internal inquiry the outcome of which is unknown uh... none of the complaints were of sexual nature so he's just picking on a girl who's more popular than him from the show real cool shit i'm sure
[SPEAKER_01]: He was probably just saying some really shitty things like that note that he wrote her thinking like oh I can pass this off as me being funny.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm just joking, but really it's like why would you fucking say that to a 20-year-old girl?
[SPEAKER_01]: Like you know what I mean like just shitty things about her acting shitty things about her lines How she's delivering I can just imagine him trying to and pat you know it's a thing where a guy next you or is rude and then you call him out and they go I was just joking
[SPEAKER_01]: Whoa, he had joke.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's like that bullshit.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's like, motherfucker, you don't have a sense of humor.
[SPEAKER_01]: You might as well call yourself Elon Musk.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're both gearing up for the release of the fifth and final season of Stranger Things.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, I do like that he's going to have to promote Stranger Things.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm hoping that he's not even going to be able to promote it because I know he loves attention more than he loves, you know, he would probably deal with having to address these rumors because at least he'd be
[SPEAKER_01]: Whereas like if they were like to sit this out and let this blow over he'd be way more pissed because he just wants attention He's an actor.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's all they crave is attention and validation and putting down women
[SPEAKER_01]: He's a freak.
[SPEAKER_01]: He's a fucking freak.
[SPEAKER_01]: I can't wait to, uh, yes, someone said I can't wait for all the tell-alls on that set in 10 or 20 years.
[SPEAKER_01]: I get girl giving five, everything will be out.
[SPEAKER_01]: David Harvard harbors a piece of shit.
[SPEAKER_01]: You look at him and think he was a nice guy.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know what I mean?
[SPEAKER_01]: Not some weird sex pest, but you don't really know anybody.
[SPEAKER_01]: You just don't really know anybody.
[SPEAKER_01]: And Lily Allen is problematic.
[SPEAKER_01]: She's not, she's not perfect.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know what I mean?
[SPEAKER_01]: She is definitely not perfect, but
[SPEAKER_01]: All right, that is our show.
[SPEAKER_01]: Thank you so much for listening.
[SPEAKER_01]: Stay safe out there.
[SPEAKER_01]: Try not to fly if you don't need to.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm going to be driving all week to these shows.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm very excited about it.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm not trying to clog up the, you know, I wish I didn't have to fly.
[SPEAKER_01]: I really do.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm trying to avoid it.
[SPEAKER_01]: Like I can drive to all these upcoming five shows because they're all in the same area.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm going to have to fly it's Dallas next weekend.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm kind of, you know, I don't want to, but I have to do it for work.
[SPEAKER_01]: If you can, try not to overload the system.
[SPEAKER_01]: I know it's hard.
[SPEAKER_01]: Everybody's got a travel.
[SPEAKER_01]: It just sucks.
[SPEAKER_01]: I feel for the TSA agents, even though they can be kind of weird.
[SPEAKER_01]: I feel for traffic, air traffic control.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're amazing.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're doing their job.
[SPEAKER_01]: Even though they're not getting paid.
[SPEAKER_01]: If you want to donate to food banks, cash is sometimes better than donating items, because the food banks have an in with vendors, and they can get the...
[SPEAKER_01]: more items than you could get on your own for cheaper so sometimes these these funds are not gonna be misappropriated these food banks are feeding people sometimes hand-in-handing somebody 30 bucks you can feed four people with that as opposed to going to the store and buying three items for 30 bucks that's gonna feed you know one person so
[SPEAKER_01]: If you can't donate money, that'd be my tip if you want to help out the food banks even, you know, 20, 50, 100 bucks.
[SPEAKER_01]: Whatever you can give, they can turn that money into much more food than you can at the store.
[SPEAKER_01]: You're getting fucked at the store.
[SPEAKER_01]: They have connections.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, it's like the underground railroad for feeding people.
[SPEAKER_01]: They got connections.
[SPEAKER_01]: They can get cheap food and feed a bunch more people.
[SPEAKER_01]: All right, upcoming shows tomorrow night, I'm in Cleveland, Ohio at Holarities, Thursday, I'm in Columbus, Ohio at the Nest Theater.
[SPEAKER_01]: Friday night, I'm in Masland, Ohio for two shows, first one sold out, second show as tickets on sale now.
[SPEAKER_01]: Saturday night, I'm in Fort Wayne, Indiana at the Fort Wayne Comedy Club, and then Sunday night, I'm in Chicago, Illinois and Zainis.
[SPEAKER_01]: Next week, I'm in Dallas, Texas, and then the following later on November, I'm going to tell you all the cities I'm going to be in throughout the rest of the year.
[SPEAKER_01]: St. Louis, Omaha, Richmond, Virginia, Muhammad, Illinois, Portland, Maine, Providence, Rhode Island, San Francisco, next year, I'll be in Detroit.
[SPEAKER_01]: Jamesville, Wisconsin, Appleton, Wisconsin, and Atlanta, Georgia.
[SPEAKER_01]: get tickets at other shop comedy.com.
[SPEAKER_01]: Don't forget to rate and review this podcast if you love it and join the Patreon for every week.
[SPEAKER_01]: You're next to episode of this podcast.
[SPEAKER_01]: Only $3 a month.
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay, I know times are tight, but three bucks.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know what I mean?
[SPEAKER_01]: I think you can do.
[SPEAKER_01]: If you really are hard up for more episodes, that's the place to be.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think 91, 91 bonus episodes are already up on Patreon.
[SPEAKER_01]: You got a lot to get through.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's 91 hours of content.
[SPEAKER_01]: I had a patreon.com slash Heather Shaw company.
[SPEAKER_01]: Thank you so much for listening.
[SPEAKER_01]: I love you so much.
[SPEAKER_01]: Have a fantastic rest of your week and stay gay.
[SPEAKER_01]: All right, see you