WEBVTT 00:00.031 --> 00:05.439 [SPEAKER_00]: So this again for the principle teacher, focus on yourself, focus on yourself. 00:05.459 --> 00:06.400 [SPEAKER_00]: Don't be selfish. 00:06.761 --> 00:20.020 [SPEAKER_00]: Doesn't mean you're not going to care about the, let's say, how is the community is doing, but I'm not going to be like all the time, all the time talking about others, and as if I am completely pure, perfect. 00:20.401 --> 00:28.232 [SPEAKER_00]: So if you're going to tell me, look what he said. 00:29.410 --> 00:33.275 [SPEAKER_00]: And this is the statement of Sayyidina Buhab, Nabbas, I loved it. 00:33.295 --> 00:40.344 [SPEAKER_00]: He said, in Allah'a ad-Lawna'a l-Lawna'a l-Lawna'a l-Muhada, Allah'a's just, he never had a does in justice to anybody. 00:40.404 --> 00:46.611 [SPEAKER_00]: Paman, what jadakayana fa l-yahmed illah, on the day of judgment, if you see good things, be grateful to Allah. 00:46.892 --> 00:49.455 [SPEAKER_00]: O man, what jadakayera, daryk fa l-ayolu, man, nayla nafsa. 00:49.835 --> 00:53.680 [SPEAKER_00]: On the day of judgment, when I see my book and that book written, 00:53.660 --> 00:56.085 [SPEAKER_00]: This thing and Allah will ask me why did you do it? 00:56.326 --> 00:57.108 [SPEAKER_00]: Don't blame anybody. 00:57.529 --> 00:58.471 [SPEAKER_00]: It's not gonna fly. 00:58.571 --> 00:59.273 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm gonna tell him. 00:59.513 --> 01:02.199 [SPEAKER_00]: My friends all did it So I didn't want to be different. 01:02.520 --> 01:03.663 [SPEAKER_00]: It's not gonna fly. 01:03.903 --> 01:06.188 [SPEAKER_00]: I wish or I grew up in a family. 01:06.228 --> 01:07.612 [SPEAKER_00]: This is the culture we did. 01:07.892 --> 01:09.576 [SPEAKER_00]: It is not gonna fly 01:09.556 --> 01:13.343 [SPEAKER_00]: He will ask each one of them about that, including me. 01:13.363 --> 01:19.814 [SPEAKER_00]: So if I find good, I'm so grateful, but if I find, to Allah, if I find not good, it is me. 01:20.115 --> 01:22.099 [SPEAKER_00]: Look at the Hassan al-Basal, what he said. 01:22.319 --> 01:22.780 [SPEAKER_00]: Beautiful. 01:23.020 --> 01:25.725 [SPEAKER_00]: We have an Adam in the Maitu-Zabir Amelik. 01:25.958 --> 01:31.707 [SPEAKER_00]: Son of Adam, you will be rewarded or taken accountable, according to what you did. 01:31.947 --> 01:53.620 [SPEAKER_00]: Fala'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a' 01:53.600 --> 01:54.802 [SPEAKER_00]: punish immediately. 01:55.102 --> 01:57.586 [SPEAKER_00]: You and me, you hurt me at heart to your right away. 01:57.806 --> 02:00.190 [SPEAKER_00]: You disobey me, anger and disobey me right away. 02:00.410 --> 02:00.670 [SPEAKER_00]: Right? 02:01.051 --> 02:01.652 [SPEAKER_00]: Not Allah. 02:02.273 --> 02:10.605 [SPEAKER_00]: So he's saying, give me an Adam, some of Adam, in the material Zabia, America, you will be rewarded or taking account of all according to what you do. 02:10.845 --> 02:16.333 [SPEAKER_00]: Hala yagurana kahim Allah, don't be rude by the forbearance of Allah. 02:16.313 --> 02:32.854 [SPEAKER_00]: And this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one, and this one 02:32.834 --> 02:35.920 [SPEAKER_00]: You can understand between the hands of Allah and all. 02:35.940 --> 02:40.488 [SPEAKER_00]: For example, very common example, we blame, let's say they must do it. 02:40.508 --> 02:43.033 [SPEAKER_00]: We blame them as just for a thousands of things. 02:43.313 --> 02:44.555 [SPEAKER_00]: Like what did you do for it? 02:44.856 --> 02:47.441 [SPEAKER_00]: Why don't we have things for this age group? 02:47.541 --> 02:48.683 [SPEAKER_00]: Why don't you start? 02:48.663 --> 02:49.024 [SPEAKER_00]: Right? 02:49.524 --> 02:53.991 [SPEAKER_00]: Why don't you help someone, you can't, you don't have the ability. 02:54.212 --> 02:55.854 [SPEAKER_00]: But you have another, why don't you help? 02:56.095 --> 02:57.297 [SPEAKER_00]: We blame others. 02:57.737 --> 03:01.223 [SPEAKER_00]: We blame others for what they are doing and what they are not doing. 03:01.624 --> 03:04.548 [SPEAKER_00]: And both is literally under not my business. 03:05.229 --> 03:09.456 [SPEAKER_00]: And Hustney, Samar Tarkuhul Alayani, you want to change something, you do it. 03:09.436 --> 03:21.167 [SPEAKER_00]: You come up with ideas, you'll be pro-actor, but don't just sit home, sit in a gathering, sipping water, coffee, water or whatever, or eating, and then we just blame everybody else. 03:21.607 --> 03:23.609 [SPEAKER_00]: That is, it was, you're at home, it's all right. 03:23.669 --> 03:27.352 [SPEAKER_00]: If they are doing wrong, either you advise them, or stay out of it. 03:27.672 --> 03:31.436 [SPEAKER_00]: Because if you are talking about them, now you are sinning. 03:31.456 --> 03:39.443 [SPEAKER_00]: We are sinning, right? 03:39.423 --> 03:40.244 [SPEAKER_00]: Rahina. 03:40.824 --> 03:44.427 [SPEAKER_00]: Every soul will be jailed, literally hostage. 03:44.687 --> 03:46.629 [SPEAKER_00]: Rahina and the Arabic language is hostage. 03:47.070 --> 03:50.072 [SPEAKER_00]: Every soul will be hostage by what she did. 03:50.312 --> 03:52.194 [SPEAKER_00]: You dress properly, Abdullah. 03:52.214 --> 03:53.995 [SPEAKER_00]: You didn't, you'll be asked. 03:54.015 --> 03:55.256 [SPEAKER_00]: You said this, Abdullah. 03:55.277 --> 03:56.738 [SPEAKER_00]: You didn't say it, you'll be asked. 03:57.278 --> 03:58.299 [SPEAKER_00]: You prayed, Abdullah. 03:58.319 --> 03:59.760 [SPEAKER_00]: You didn't, you'll be asked. 03:59.780 --> 04:00.041 [SPEAKER_00]: Right? 04:00.421 --> 04:07.947 [SPEAKER_00]: And again, I'm going to really re-emphasize this. 04:08.147 --> 04:08.788 [SPEAKER_00]: Don't 04:08.768 --> 04:18.053 [SPEAKER_00]: If you only record with the permission of the group when we are sitting in a gathering recorded and listened to it when you go home 04:18.640 --> 04:22.364 [SPEAKER_00]: and see how many of these principles we did not apply. 04:22.705 --> 04:25.207 [SPEAKER_00]: Or Allah spent all the taught us and we are not doing. 04:25.788 --> 04:31.755 [SPEAKER_00]: And for the one of the very righteous man, he said, Wailum, wailum is low on you. 04:32.235 --> 04:34.918 [SPEAKER_00]: Or it is actually a valley in Jahnem. 04:35.179 --> 04:38.002 [SPEAKER_00]: You know, when Allah says, Wailum, the kuleum is a thing, yomazer. 04:38.182 --> 04:42.707 [SPEAKER_00]: So the wail is, you do try to say to, whoa, one of the meaning of it is a valley in Jahnem. 04:42.687 --> 04:46.453 [SPEAKER_00]: He said, way, long, dementia, Allah, with them, goodness, and them be. 04:46.473 --> 05:00.897 [SPEAKER_00]: World to that person was busy with others, what others are doing from sins or what the sins, the others are doing, and he is, or she is completely not worried about her son, completely. 05:01.238 --> 05:02.620 [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, she did that. 05:02.600 --> 05:04.282 [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe you don't do this, maybe. 05:04.543 --> 05:06.986 [SPEAKER_00]: A lot of other things I do. 05:07.327 --> 05:07.767 [SPEAKER_00]: No way. 05:08.088 --> 05:13.215 [SPEAKER_00]: So this again, to principle, teach you, focus on yourself, focus on yourself. 05:13.235 --> 05:14.196 [SPEAKER_00]: Don't be selfish. 05:14.537 --> 05:24.191 [SPEAKER_00]: Doesn't mean you're not going to care about the, or let's say, how is the community is doing, but I'm not going to look all the time, all the time talking about others. 05:24.671 --> 05:27.816 [SPEAKER_00]: And as if I am completely pure, perfect. 05:28.176 --> 05:32.202 [SPEAKER_00]: Safiyam is telling, look what he said. 05:32.182 --> 05:41.796 [SPEAKER_00]: that Allah will not make him carry, but his sin have fatality as Arunas. 05:42.697 --> 05:47.664 [SPEAKER_00]: The burden of the other, the sins of the others will be very light for him. 05:48.285 --> 05:49.707 [SPEAKER_00]: Ustarakhamina Dambu. 05:49.727 --> 05:55.114 [SPEAKER_00]: He is, or she is, very comfortable, feels free from the sins of the others. 05:55.575 --> 05:56.316 [SPEAKER_00]: Right? 05:56.296 --> 06:00.645 [SPEAKER_00]: Let's say very common, this is one of the very frequent questions I get. 06:00.945 --> 06:03.671 [SPEAKER_00]: My husband does this or does that without the details. 06:04.031 --> 06:06.196 [SPEAKER_00]: First question, is it affecting you? 06:06.216 --> 06:08.761 [SPEAKER_00]: If it's affecting you, you have to be very careful. 06:08.781 --> 06:13.570 [SPEAKER_00]: Are you doing your best will-host now in the nice way, including to change this? 06:13.951 --> 06:15.675 [SPEAKER_00]: He's not affecting you, right? 06:16.015 --> 06:17.899 [SPEAKER_00]: It is his sin. 06:17.879 --> 06:20.081 [SPEAKER_00]: There is a reason why you need to stay. 06:20.382 --> 06:21.062 [SPEAKER_00]: Then, done. 06:21.122 --> 06:23.285 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not going to be all the time. 06:23.345 --> 06:26.408 [SPEAKER_00]: All the time, where did it affects me? 06:26.888 --> 06:27.909 [SPEAKER_00]: What are you about yourself? 06:28.270 --> 06:30.372 [SPEAKER_00]: Day of judgment, he's not going to come to save you. 06:30.652 --> 06:34.756 [SPEAKER_00]: And you will not be able to see him even if you want to do that. 06:35.157 --> 06:38.841 [SPEAKER_00]: Look at the principles another lesson we take from this. 06:38.861 --> 06:40.663 [SPEAKER_00]: This is from in the Kailung Tawak. 06:40.683 --> 06:42.785 [SPEAKER_00]: And this is in the Dharajus Salikim. 06:42.805 --> 06:44.967 [SPEAKER_00]: The Dharajus Salikim is an amazing book. 06:44.947 --> 06:52.642 [SPEAKER_00]: which is talks about the stations that the servant of Allah has to go through to become at the end very close to Allah. 06:52.662 --> 06:55.467 [SPEAKER_00]: It's a big book, it's two volumes, amazing book. 06:55.487 --> 07:00.036 [SPEAKER_00]: Two, it starts by and then, you know, you know, you know, the Sahwa is, you know, 07:00.016 --> 07:05.747 [SPEAKER_00]: you get out of your completely heedless about what are you doing in this life where are you going. 07:05.767 --> 07:22.378 [SPEAKER_00]: So, about this he said, this principle, that as you know as you're a Tumwizra Okhara, no soul will carry the burden of another soul, to al Limus Salik teaches the person who really is serious about working to our last Pantal in the path. 07:22.358 --> 07:28.346 [SPEAKER_00]: But the Haroruminal al-Aqq, write it in Arabic, I'll translate it to be free from attachments. 07:28.867 --> 07:29.448 [SPEAKER_00]: How is that? 07:29.708 --> 07:30.229 [SPEAKER_00]: How is that? 07:30.529 --> 07:36.157 [SPEAKER_00]: This principle, I am not going to be killing myself because somebody else is disobeying Allah. 07:36.177 --> 07:37.338 [SPEAKER_00]: How it's going to make me free? 07:39.021 --> 07:41.464 [SPEAKER_00]: Free of the burden of what? 07:41.545 --> 07:45.036 [SPEAKER_00]: It is not my responsibility, that's number one you have to learn. 07:45.819 --> 07:54.205 [SPEAKER_00]: It is not my responsibility, if my 20 year old or 25 year old may Allah protect your children, decided to go another way. 07:54.978 --> 07:58.282 [SPEAKER_00]: It's painful, but I'm not going to kill myself for it. 07:58.943 --> 08:02.488 [SPEAKER_00]: Even if I didn't do the best, Allah knows, Allah knows. 08:02.829 --> 08:08.817 [SPEAKER_00]: The only thing I can keep doing is I can't keep, maybe you have for them, you don't cut them, right? 08:09.217 --> 08:11.801 [SPEAKER_00]: Don't keep blaming them, don't push them away. 08:12.021 --> 08:13.944 [SPEAKER_00]: But I'm not going to keep killing myself. 08:14.004 --> 08:16.086 [SPEAKER_00]: And this is what you see it very frequently. 08:16.367 --> 08:24.698 [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe people don't say it to you, or maybe don't take it, but don't talk about it, but internally it hurts. 08:24.678 --> 08:28.604 [SPEAKER_00]: That's why it makes you free because once you accept, you're free. 08:28.944 --> 08:35.393 [SPEAKER_00]: Now, anybody in this room or anybody who's listening to me, if you've ever had one to through this stages of loss. 08:35.914 --> 08:43.124 [SPEAKER_00]: Stages of loss, loss being death, or loss something, or anything that you lose that is very special human beings. 08:43.204 --> 08:47.550 [SPEAKER_00]: I'm talking about whether by death or by end of a relationship or whatever. 08:47.570 --> 08:50.234 [SPEAKER_00]: It is very painful in the beginning. 08:50.534 --> 08:54.600 [SPEAKER_00]: When do you feel you're okay when you accept it? 08:55.981 --> 08:56.722 [SPEAKER_00]: It takes time. 08:56.762 --> 08:57.503 [SPEAKER_00]: He is stages. 08:57.543 --> 08:58.545 [SPEAKER_00]: It takes about a year. 08:58.565 --> 09:00.288 [SPEAKER_00]: In case of death, it takes at least a year. 09:00.548 --> 09:06.358 [SPEAKER_00]: To accept it, there is a rejection, there is disbelief or rejection, depression. 09:06.378 --> 09:07.479 [SPEAKER_00]: This is all. 09:07.860 --> 09:11.766 [SPEAKER_00]: But then at the end, that's from the Rahma of Allah SWT. 09:12.107 --> 09:13.449 [SPEAKER_00]: He makes us accepted. 09:13.689 --> 09:18.317 [SPEAKER_00]: And how does a woman live after a mother lives after she uses her child? 09:18.537 --> 09:21.702 [SPEAKER_00]: If you think of it, normally say I will never be able to. 09:21.882 --> 09:22.984 [SPEAKER_00]: Because it's natural. 09:22.964 --> 09:31.276 [SPEAKER_00]: but may Allah protect you all, protect the children all, but our friends will ask their children and their life goes on after nothing exactly the same. 09:31.616 --> 09:35.421 [SPEAKER_00]: There's something still, but it's not like the same the first day. 09:35.742 --> 09:43.132 [SPEAKER_00]: So it is gradual, any, I have a friend of mine, may Allah give her, generally, if you do, lost her 19 year old son in a car accident, suddenly. 09:43.393 --> 09:51.604 [SPEAKER_00]: And what he went to the airport to take his friend month or four, they were in the car, three from the same community, three of them were killed. 09:51.584 --> 09:54.791 [SPEAKER_00]: Panullah was like a thunderstorm hit the car and then they were done. 09:55.151 --> 09:55.372 [SPEAKER_00]: Right? 09:55.713 --> 10:01.945 [SPEAKER_00]: So, Panullah Eto Karawayo, still when she talks about took on probably five years to get to Israel. 10:02.507 --> 10:03.148 [SPEAKER_00]: It's very hard. 10:03.168 --> 10:04.210 [SPEAKER_00]: Don't want to listen. 10:04.426 --> 10:28.982 [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, so I'm Allah, but Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah 10:28.962 --> 10:31.545 [SPEAKER_00]: You're going to just say accept that you're Allah who changed them. 10:31.765 --> 10:32.826 [SPEAKER_00]: You are Allah's painful. 10:33.027 --> 10:34.168 [SPEAKER_00]: It's not going to be not painful. 10:34.408 --> 10:35.549 [SPEAKER_00]: To always be painful. 10:35.830 --> 10:38.032 [SPEAKER_00]: But the pain will be like a scar. 10:38.152 --> 10:39.734 [SPEAKER_00]: You know, when we have a scar, right? 10:39.814 --> 10:40.755 [SPEAKER_00]: There's always a scar. 10:40.916 --> 10:42.217 [SPEAKER_00]: But the pain gets less and less. 10:42.237 --> 10:44.159 [SPEAKER_00]: But it's a skill still a scar. 10:44.179 --> 10:45.080 [SPEAKER_00]: And it will be free. 10:45.481 --> 10:47.283 [SPEAKER_00]: You will be free to hold on and out. 10:47.343 --> 10:49.025 [SPEAKER_00]: It's amazing how he said it. 10:49.225 --> 10:50.767 [SPEAKER_00]: Palaik Muuham Adam bin Ahmad. 10:50.987 --> 10:53.670 [SPEAKER_00]: And he's not going to worry about the sin of somebody else. 10:53.650 --> 10:54.879 [SPEAKER_00]: and don't talk about them. 10:55.121 --> 10:57.861 [SPEAKER_00]: When someone is singing in a front of you, don't talk about it. 10:58.103 --> 11:01.467 [SPEAKER_00]: Because now you're like that, but you're doing something different, but you're saying