[SPEAKER_01]: Welcome to the Forty K-Lorecast.
[SPEAKER_01]: Welcome to Forty-K-Lorecast with me, John Barsati, and Brad Chester.
[SPEAKER_01]: This guy!
[SPEAKER_01]: Today, after Brad is fully recovered from the disappointment of Gaines' workshop releasing the other Vulcan model, not the one he wanted.
[SPEAKER_01]: Uh, I'm a rabble rabble!
[SPEAKER_01]: And also not giving us the codex with Salamanders, we're going to cover the almost as noble as Ultramarine's Salamanders.
[SPEAKER_00]: Salamander!
[SPEAKER_01]: As always, 40K Lordcasts, a weekly show covering the Warhammer 40K universe, releasing every Monday at 7 p.m. Eastern.
[SPEAKER_01]: Please follow the cast, comment on it, it really does help us out and it takes a second of your guys lives.
[SPEAKER_01]: If you like the cast, you want to hear more of it.
[SPEAKER_01]: Come on over to our YouTube page, the 40K Lord cast.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're going to find some of our early episodes converted over with imagery, our live Q&A session, and our others show the history of 40K, plus some other ones coming up in the 2026.
[SPEAKER_01]: This is 2026 or 2027, and yeah, it's all there already for you guys and graduations.
[SPEAKER_01]: You're late to the party, but you don't have to wait for anything.
[SPEAKER_01]: Well done, Jai.
[SPEAKER_01]: Well done.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's always a win.
[SPEAKER_01]: In the show notes, it's also a link to our Patreon.
[SPEAKER_01]: Our Patreon is really helping us out quite a bit with equipment, expansion, this kind of stuff.
[SPEAKER_01]: We're able to actually hire editors and the like to help us expand in new areas.
[SPEAKER_01]: Our Patreon has one tier.
[SPEAKER_01]: It gets you to show ad free.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's $4.99 a month.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's it.
[SPEAKER_01]: Or if you're more of the quiet type, $4.34 euros.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now that's today dollars, I never know what the euro's gonna be when you guys listen to this by the way.
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's just say you live in Memingen, which is in Bavaria, which I actually visited randomly in 2004 on my way to October fest.
[SPEAKER_01]: We were driving from Italy all the way in and we're exhausted and decided we didn't deal with Munich.
[SPEAKER_01]: So we found on a map because that's how old this was, a paper map.
[SPEAKER_01]: We found a little town pulled over and it was so cool looking because it's like almost gingerbread house looks.
[SPEAKER_01]: And the whole town is centered around kind of quality of life.
[SPEAKER_01]: There's actually a very low speed limit.
[SPEAKER_01]: The goal is to make it so you never feel rushed.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a nice thing.
[SPEAKER_01]: But they have a really cool piece of history.
[SPEAKER_01]: Memagin, or meming it, I'm piping out in this wrong.
[SPEAKER_01]: And I'm sorry, Germans, but your words are not easy.
[SPEAKER_01]: It you keep adding letters to everything till we reach a point where it's just, I don't know what we're trying to say here.
[SPEAKER_01]: But in 1525, this is where the 12 peasant articles are written.
[SPEAKER_01]: And for those who don't know history, this was kind of like the Magna Carta, but for the rest of us, the Magna Carta was originally, it did say that King was up to the same laws as the rest of the land, but it wasn't really enforced.
[SPEAKER_01]: It was more the King versus the nobles.
[SPEAKER_01]: The 12th peasant articles are much cooler.
[SPEAKER_01]: They have things in there like rent has to be proportional to the output of the crop fields.
[SPEAKER_01]: Nobles can't come, make you work for free.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, and no more surfs.
[SPEAKER_01]: So anyway.
[SPEAKER_01]: That was a big one, by the way, no more serves.
[SPEAKER_01]: So that's some cool stuff in there about how the priests get paid.
[SPEAKER_01]: There's a lot of things in there.
[SPEAKER_01]: Really, really great, because it's a key part of the Protestant Reformation.
[SPEAKER_01]: So anyway, Memagame, lastly, we also have our discord.
[SPEAKER_01]: So please, if you're looking to interact more, if you have questions for us, let me know.
[SPEAKER_01]: If you live in Memmingin and when it's going to be how it's supposed to pronounce that jump on into the discord And I we happy to hear from you great community going on right there.
[SPEAKER_01]: A lot of common lot of great conversations We're not getting some good painting competitions going on there, right, which is really cool awesome legit stuff.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, you know, it's also awesome watching the fitness journey of people That's a channel's active bro.
[SPEAKER_01]: What we should do one of you.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's not
[SPEAKER_00]: I'd still lift really heavy weights, I guess.
[SPEAKER_01]: Wait, this Brad's after photo worse than his before photo.
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know why I'll be worse.
[SPEAKER_01]: Sorry, to be fair, you're 54.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm 44.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm at the point now where I look at photos of myself 10 years ago and just want to die inside Anyway, let's get into it.
[SPEAKER_01]: 18th Legion.
[SPEAKER_01]: I was with every Legion.
[SPEAKER_01]: The Salamanders were originally called the 18th Legion Like all the original chapters.
[SPEAKER_01]: They were created with their primarx gene seed, but well before the primarx was ever discovered Also before the Chaos God's teleported the primarx away.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a It's a weird thing anyway
[SPEAKER_01]: each of the legions, the infusion of the primarck would affect them both mentally, as well as physically, creating some disparity in them, sort of kind of.
[SPEAKER_01]: I say, sort of kind of because in reality when you read the books,
[SPEAKER_01]: It's not always clear, but the salamanders are apparently one of the ones that is more affected.
[SPEAKER_01]: Much like the space wolves, and I think there's another one in there too.
[SPEAKER_01]: But they're absolutely, it was Alpha Legion.
[SPEAKER_01]: The Alpha Legion are very unique looking, and they are labor having a mystery around their origins.
[SPEAKER_01]: In the case, the space wolves, the mystery was, at one point, it was normal.
[SPEAKER_01]: And then later, writing there was wolf DNA in there.
[SPEAKER_01]: And I think that went away again.
[SPEAKER_00]: The cars in the little car are just there.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'll be honest.
[SPEAKER_01]: I love, I love space-wolf players.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't love space-wolf lore.
[SPEAKER_01]: But space-wolf players make me like space-wolf lore more.
[UNKNOWN]: Oh!
[SPEAKER_01]: Just can't wait.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're fun to play against.
[SPEAKER_01]: If you play against space-wolf, they'll have a bad game.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's weird.
[SPEAKER_01]: Space-wolf players, I think.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think they're the orc players of the space-mared factions.
[SPEAKER_00]: The orc players, I love everything about them.
[SPEAKER_01]: Good.
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, orc players are fun, not all, though.
[SPEAKER_01]: The vast majority of orc players are fun.
[SPEAKER_01]: Just calling a spade.
[SPEAKER_01]: Call it spade a spade.
[SPEAKER_01]: All right.
[SPEAKER_00]: And they are on the, but that is the biggest one of the big things I'm the start is that the salamanders are listed as unknown origin of far where they went originally.
[SPEAKER_00]: And they'll pick up looking.
[SPEAKER_01]: Exactly.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, nocturne.
[SPEAKER_01]: And there's always potential with that, but my theory and that's always been cloning that them, the wolves, the Alpha Legion actually were cloned, not taken from a region, but I digress.
[SPEAKER_01]: One really interesting piece about 18th Legion is that their history dates back to the unification wars in a documented sense.
[SPEAKER_01]: So when we talk about 40K lore history, all right?
[SPEAKER_01]: There's a lot of this stuff is, here's a story that's fully redacted and cannot be found anywhere in Imperial Records.
[SPEAKER_01]: And I'm gonna give it to you of next 50 pages of this code hex, right?
[SPEAKER_01]: But it's not official.
[SPEAKER_01]: This one is actually an official story that is told within the Imperium, and that's what that makes it a much bigger deal than the super secret thing that everyone's aware of, like the Badab Wars, which are you no one's supposed to know about them at all, and we put everybody else two hours on them.
[SPEAKER_01]: So, the unification words were brutal, so the challenge effectively was that all of these BART techno barbarian warlords were an issue, some were pacified more easily than others, and one of the ones that was really hard to pacify were the F-NARC, which lived in the Caucus Wastes, which is, by the way, lazy writing on the part of GW.
[SPEAKER_01]: but also genius use of the English language, and I don't know which way I want to go with this, because FNARK means a government ruled by an FNARC, and an FNARC is a ruler of people with whom he holds like a similar ethnicity or alignment religion.
[SPEAKER_01]: So a lot of times you would call a religious leader of an area, he's the FNARC.
[SPEAKER_01]: So clever use of the word, but also kind of lazy that they just went, oh yeah, this is people over here, they're all the FNARC's,
[SPEAKER_01]: All right.
[SPEAKER_01]: Good job guys, but I'll be honest.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm going to be a part of it right in the notes for this.
[SPEAKER_01]: The only reason I knew that word was a real word is because I typed it into Microsoft Word and then get a red squiggly line and I'm like huh.
[SPEAKER_00]: So this is a real word as opposed to the rest of the things that you type and you got our mind.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, anyway, so situated in the Caucus Mountains of Europe, the Afnarchs provided me one of the toughest tests for the emperor and his forces.
[SPEAKER_01]: The Afnarch were this incredibly advanced group of techno barbarians, and it's because they actually possessed a larger ray of tech dating back to the age of technology.
[SPEAKER_01]: What's interesting about that is it's not clear if that technology they possess the whole time or if it was just in the region they went to.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, because they have a legion of sikers that are effectively thrall sikers, but also this is before you had siker armies.
[SPEAKER_01]: So yeah, they had tennelikers, they also had their own Thunder Warriors effectively.
[SPEAKER_01]: So they would
[SPEAKER_01]: really on defenses where they got nasty.
[SPEAKER_01]: So the Afnarch had built their entire civilization under the mountains, like deep underground.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, but in dwarven fortresses, basing that they're in bunkers, like miles deep bunkers, that they're their entire civilization center.
[SPEAKER_01]: which is a really cool story until you add to the fact they also had a force field surrounding them that was impenetrable.
[SPEAKER_01]: So they didn't have to dig down into the mountains.
[SPEAKER_01]: They just had a big force field anyway.
[SPEAKER_00]: They didn't need to, but they wanted to.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, because everyone wants to live on.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, it's funny.
[SPEAKER_01]: I was like, everyone wants to have a ground, but they remembered what Earth looked like at this era.
[SPEAKER_00]: On the ground.
[SPEAKER_00]: Probably wanted to go on the ground.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, actually was better.
[SPEAKER_00]: Hey man, how's it outside?
[SPEAKER_00]: Radioactive and weird.
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's go inside.
[SPEAKER_01]: Basically, these were akin to the force fields of Dune, where you cannot shoot them.
[SPEAKER_01]: The only way to deal with this force field is actually walk up to it and try and penetrate it.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now, the Emperor did try and do that in the early stage of the Unification Wars.
[SPEAKER_01]: And he lost tens of thousands of thunder warriors, plus millions of regular troops.
[SPEAKER_00]: This, you know, and I'm gonna get on my little soapbox again.
[SPEAKER_00]: I, the emperor, they, just the way they write it, the emperor is either a genius.
[SPEAKER_00]: Next, you can't even figure out what he's doing.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's playing 40 chess.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_00]: And then there's times like this when you're like, which is eventually what he does.
[SPEAKER_00]: And you're like, hey, man,
[SPEAKER_00]: these guys are underground and they don't really affect anything, leave them there, they don't have any way to affect me.
[SPEAKER_00]: And I'll just come back eventually and do something about it.
[SPEAKER_00]: They're like, why are you least together, buddy?
[SPEAKER_00]: You could just go, oh, there's three exits to their fortress, just don't let them leave there.
[SPEAKER_01]: Cool.
[SPEAKER_00]: The Emperor is a master of poor impulse control.
[SPEAKER_01]: And so to Brad's point, exactly what the average hit, he just surrounded it with some of his troops and then went and fought the rest of the unification wars, but he knew he had to go back there.
[SPEAKER_01]: And so the plan came, he conquered all of the rest of the planet, now I feel deal with the F-narks.
[SPEAKER_01]: And it's why this is one of many great culminations of the end of,
[SPEAKER_01]: So whatever, it's like the writing is so frickin' annoying with a stock, so I'm like, well wait, that wasn't the last battle of the Unification Wars.
[SPEAKER_01]: No, it wasn't, but if you read the Salamenda Codex, sure sounds like it was.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's the one that counted, baby.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes, the one that counted the most in this novel.
[SPEAKER_01]: Anyway, plan is to do this massive assault to take down the shields and then kill all of them.
[SPEAKER_01]: And this was known as the assault on the Tempest Galleries.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now, this is how the 18th Legion make their name.
[SPEAKER_01]: The Emperor decides to deploy his special legion of a star days to the task of taking down the force field and not Obi-Wan Kenobi style, rather they're going to deploy and just basically blow up the power supplies, if they could.
[SPEAKER_01]: However, the power supplies are built during the golden age of technology, it was really an impossible death.
[SPEAKER_01]: hundreds of kilometers below this kind of thing.
[SPEAKER_00]: They're like so far, yeah, which by the way, fun John's side story, this is impossible to dig down that deep and I know this because we tried, well, the Russian is tried in both of us, come on, sell the story well, John, the US and Russia were basically going at it in the way we always used to go at it because of the Cold War.
[SPEAKER_00]: And the Russians, well, sorry, the US just went or pretty done with this and the Russians being Russians went no we're gonna keep going how far forever Well, forever was not forever forever was pretty deep But no, it was that I mean this was in thank you for us
[SPEAKER_01]: If you look at it from a comparative standpoint, so in 1970, Russia started digging a hole in the earth.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's best way to explain it.
[SPEAKER_01]: They gave up 20 years later with the fall of the USSR by the way, and they discovered something fun.
[SPEAKER_01]: If you try to dig into earth, it gets a lot dense, and it also gets oddly hot, yeah, it melted drill bits.
[SPEAKER_01]: So after 20 years of drilling down, they made it 12 kilometers, so 7.5 miles.
[SPEAKER_01]: I can, by the way, you can see that far.
[SPEAKER_01]: The horizon is 13 miles away.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was just going to say, yeah, you also have the fact that is a spec of dust.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you talk about the actual, yeah, you're sweet of the earth.
[SPEAKER_01]: No, we're near the mantle.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, exactly.
[SPEAKER_01]: According to this story, they were 10 to 20 times that death.
[SPEAKER_01]: I assume using unobtainium and nanotechnology, duh, yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: So anyway, speaking of going deep, I think it's just not even further.
[SPEAKER_01]: So the 18th lesion are tasked with penetrating this sub-training facility, and they can't go through the front door, so they go journey to the center of the earth, which wasn't a good movie, but the sequel was actually worse.
[SPEAKER_00]: However, I think you meant to say the core with on a tadia just drilling it in, baby.
[SPEAKER_01]: Good.
[SPEAKER_01]: Got that movie.
[SPEAKER_00]: Our suits only protect us to 3,000 degrees and we're going to hit with 6,000 degrees.
[SPEAKER_00]: No one's going to come back and he comes out there.
[SPEAKER_00]: you're not going to make it to feed.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sorry if you didn't see the movie that makes absolutely no sense.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh my god, it was so dark.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, that's it.
[SPEAKER_01]: No one gives you an audio cast.
[SPEAKER_01]: No one gives you my face.
[SPEAKER_01]: My jawster dropping as you begin quoting a movie that I looked at and went, yeah, I'm not watching that.
[SPEAKER_00]: It was terrible.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, because I looked there and went, yeah, I'm not watching that.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'll go.
[SPEAKER_00]: We won't.
[SPEAKER_00]: You were correct, sir.
[SPEAKER_00]: Would you win?
[SPEAKER_00]: Hey, that looks terrible.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would.
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me take a look and see here and I went.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's pretty bad.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, pretty shit.
[SPEAKER_01]: All right.
[SPEAKER_01]: So the 18th Legion have to get down there.
[SPEAKER_01]: So how do they do this?
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, for those of us who played prior editions, we had a really cool forage rope model and it was so busted, but it was so many of these, by the way.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think I have three.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're, oh, it's one.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's quite some of the stuff that goes to legends, I actually threw away.
[SPEAKER_01]: But I've kept all my orgs, and all my termite drills, and a couple of the random things, just in the dream that they might come back.
[SPEAKER_01]: Because termite drills were amazing.
[SPEAKER_01]: The burying rhino transport, the front drill could kill a knight.
[SPEAKER_01]: This was three attacks, strength 14, AP4, D3, plus six damage, and it had a Melta, and it had multiple Melta's.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, yeah, these things were awesome.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, melt our rain.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, they were really good at my deathguard army in the ninth and eighth.
[SPEAKER_01]: Woo.
[SPEAKER_01]: Anyway, so the rest of the legion and the custodes are all looking at this going, sorry, the rest of the legions and the custodes look at this plan of taking these termite drills in and go, all right, well, those guys are all going to die because the drills aren't going to get there.
[SPEAKER_01]: And if they did, they were all going to die taking the power supply.
[SPEAKER_01]: So the drills take off, the story's kind of cool.
[SPEAKER_01]: The drills take off and almost immediately the emperor's scanners, including a psychiatrist, can't pick them up anymore.
[SPEAKER_00]: No, I haven't put the soapbox away so I'm jumping back on it.
[SPEAKER_00]: What is he then going on in the 41st millennium?
[SPEAKER_00]: Was standing?
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_00]: Your scanners are, hey Ted, what is the scanner saying?
[SPEAKER_00]: Ted's just staring out going, I don't see anything.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're like, what about the scanner?
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, scanners apparently don't work and let's go.
[SPEAKER_01]: I had a thought about that and, you know, when in the aliens, when they go to LV428, right?
[SPEAKER_01]: And they have the scanner for the motion detector, like that's technology we had.
[SPEAKER_01]: So maybe at a certain point, we just stopped developing and go scanning for chumps.
[SPEAKER_00]: I guess.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just they never know what's because everybody's always sneaking up on everyone.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, but it is, it's the entire, it's the same thing with aliens.
[SPEAKER_00]: Think about it.
[SPEAKER_01]: But like everybody will, and also with Starship Troopers, so many of these things, we deployed as a random place.
[SPEAKER_01]: And they're like, oh yeah, we can't see anything down there.
[SPEAKER_01]: Really?
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_00]: But it also sometimes they go back and go, I've identified every single person on the planet and what they're wearing.
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, like, yeah, I can mark down hair and eye color for every single person instead of entire hive city.
[SPEAKER_01]: Really?
[SPEAKER_01]: Cool.
[SPEAKER_01]: Is there anything under the hive city?
[SPEAKER_00]: Absolutely no idea anybody got guns.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can't tell you that.
[SPEAKER_01]: I can tell you what kind of jeans they're wearing now And size too yeah
[SPEAKER_01]: So, anyway, the 80th Legion go in and they disappear from sensors and the emperor's forces just wait, holding their defensive posture hours, days, weeks go by and then in classic writing, a bunch of the advisors go to the emperor and say, hey, we have to change tactics, your thing failed.
[SPEAKER_01]: And the emperor turns to them and says, they shall not fail me.
[SPEAKER_01]: They will return from this fire.
[SPEAKER_01]: This it shall never be.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a terrible phrase.
[SPEAKER_01]: But anyway, it's also you didn't even say it right you got to give some Oms to it because I actually want to believe the emperor has like a bad list.
[SPEAKER_01]: Marriage exactly they found they found not fail me like it would be amazing the most powerful man on earth He's got this incredible list
[SPEAKER_00]: super high pitched.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I would be cool.
[SPEAKER_01]: Good.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: Anyway, so right after he says that of course, the ground begins to shake, the force fields collapse and all hell breaks loose.
[SPEAKER_01]: Effectively, the entire empire forces go, oh, cool.
[SPEAKER_01]: The force fields down.
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's go stab all of them and they run in there and begin killing everybody.
[SPEAKER_01]: After they achieved victory, as they're dragging the last F-Narks out to be interrogated and executed, one of the local volcanoes explodes and outpops, like a termite drill, or maybe a couple of them, carrying 1,000 18th Legioners.
[SPEAKER_00]: Of the 20th house, they were, yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: And they, of course, talk to them and they learn the story and the story of their battle underground is pretty cool.
[SPEAKER_01]: So, they arrive in the underground facility, the 18th land Legion is mostly intact, about 90% of them survive the journey.
[SPEAKER_01]: So, good job, mechanicum.
[SPEAKER_01]: nice job on that drill.
[SPEAKER_01]: The inhabitants of the underground facility are a little surprised.
[SPEAKER_01]: They just, they just, they just, in fact, for those of us, we've talked about Necrons before, they in effect tunneled into a tomb world.
[SPEAKER_01]: The power supply of the ethnarchy was not their own.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's most likely they conquered something where this was already there because whoever put it there,
[SPEAKER_01]: opens up and they get blank stares, the things that are all sitting down there.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now what sucks for them is that the things that are down there, this whole area is so deep that rock is molten.
[SPEAKER_01]: Metal is molten down there.
[SPEAKER_01]: So you've got men of iron who are in effect who are built to work in this area who haven't seen a biologic being in yes.
[SPEAKER_01]: Ten down there.
[SPEAKER_00]: And the answer is yes.
[SPEAKER_01]: And then they kind of look, so I like the idea of they looked at each other, both of them, and then these Denzians just went, well, let's just kill all them and attack.
[SPEAKER_01]: The 18th Legion learns a pretty fun story.
[SPEAKER_01]: These things were very well-armored, so armored that all the weapons they brought with them did nothing but make them angrier like Mongo.
[SPEAKER_01]: but unlike Mongo, they were not only pawn in game of life.
[SPEAKER_01]: I love that movie.
[SPEAKER_01]: God.
[SPEAKER_01]: I love that movie so much.
[SPEAKER_01]: Anyway, after about the two thirds of the Legion die, pretty quick, they discover that they need a plan, because they run away.
[SPEAKER_01]: The only way they're able to destroy these...
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, men of iron super robots was to collapse a building on top of them.
[SPEAKER_01]: They could crush them the death, but they couldn't shoot them.
[SPEAKER_01]: They couldn't hit them at thunder hammers.
[SPEAKER_01]: It just did nothing.
[SPEAKER_01]: So they decide, and they, or they figure out, however it works, that all of these men of iron have a central processing intelligence, not that dissimilar from the Votan course.
[SPEAKER_01]: So if they can just take out the main node, then everything also fall apart.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now of course, the main node is not just sitting there hanging out having tea.
[SPEAKER_01]: So they had to go deal with it.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's very heavily defended.
[SPEAKER_01]: And this story makes the 18th-eat-eat just sound more badass, so that's what we're gonna cover it.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's they're going to make a diversion to someone has to make a diversion over there so that it'll open up the course they can hit the core and the problem is the people who do the diversion are going to die and the 18th Legion have to do a lottery the lottery though is not for the diversion the lottery is for the main assault because every single a start is the 18th Legion volunteered for the suicide mission.
[SPEAKER_01]: I would rather die and save my brother than be the one who survives and which I was like, all right, that's actually pretty badass.
[SPEAKER_01]: So they had to do a lottery for who didn't get to go on the suicide mission.
[SPEAKER_01]: Good job.
[SPEAKER_01]: You're welcome.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, this, if you want to know more about this, it's in Horace Harris, he book two, that's about three pages, and it's well written, but the quick hits are the distraction works, the attack force makes the central node, but it's not just some computer, it's basically a super AI, and it's about the size of a Titan.
[SPEAKER_01]: So the Titan rises up to kill them all, and just as they're doing that, one of the groups leading a diversion basically
[SPEAKER_01]: So fantastic.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's really well written.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm giving you the quick hit.
[SPEAKER_01]: If you wanted bits more detail, go read the book.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a pretty bad ass moment.
[SPEAKER_01]: As always, the very last second, the great hero, saves them all.
[SPEAKER_01]: But as the main processing unit dies, this chain reaction because of course, this chain reaction happens and the whole chain remains the fall apart.
[SPEAKER_01]: And so the remaining 18th Legionnaires just start running back to their termite drills, but while they're doing it, they're grabbing stuff.
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, oh, this looks might be important.
[SPEAKER_01]: And just grabbing random things, like early fallout, and you're playing early fallout, you're just grabbing random stuff to go sell later.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're just grabbing, oh, here's a toaster.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, you know, here's a CPU from one of the men of iron, and they grab it all, jump in the termite drills and escape.
[SPEAKER_01]: So, after the battle, the emperor personally commends the 18th Legion for their actions and the assault the tempest galleries.
[SPEAKER_01]: He directs the manufacturers, I always pronounce that wrong, and recruitment centers to place a precedent on rebuilding the 18th Legion.
[SPEAKER_01]: because he wanted to show everyone how much he valued loyalty and bravery amongst his soldiers.
[SPEAKER_01]: Interesting side note, some of the other legions work overly thrilled by this.
[SPEAKER_00]: This, it's every time anybody gets something, they, all of the legions with their primaries, everyone's unbelievably jealous of everything, forever, because they're being overshadowed.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now, from that, we're going to jump a little bit to post-unification wars.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now, the challenges even with the Emperor's Edict to resupply the 18th Legion, they were still a minuscule force, because it's not easy to make a space marines.
[SPEAKER_01]: At this stage, the Emperor only had Tara to pull recruits from, and Tara had spent the last millennia waging a war across it, and he still had to supply recruits to the other 19 legions, because we were still had 20 at this stage.
[SPEAKER_01]: As such, the 18th Legion had to be deployed in a unique fashion.
[SPEAKER_01]: Firstly, they were used only as support.
[SPEAKER_01]: So they fought along the 11th, the 8th, they didn't fight with the first, because the first were doing some crap that need to say.
[SPEAKER_00]: No, it's not one.
[SPEAKER_01]: Exactly.
[SPEAKER_01]: But over time, the 18th Legion began deploying largely with the regular military, not a star to these humans.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, and we're at the Salam Energy Act.
[SPEAKER_00]: They were loon as the Dragon Warriors for us.
[SPEAKER_01]: We're going to 18th Legion, just to use here.
[SPEAKER_01]: But I like about this is that they were deployed in battles where a few space Marines could turn the tide without a need for a full Legion.
[SPEAKER_01]: And mostly, they were deployed to handle events behind the main thrust of the Great Crusade.
[SPEAKER_01]: because as a great crusade pushed out where the bulk of the military was the front lines, obviously, as it should be, but the galaxy is a big place, warp exists, and humans will human.
[SPEAKER_01]: So you're going to get these small xeno incursions behind you, space-hulk suddenly appearing.
[SPEAKER_01]: Imperial governors decide that they didn't want to be part of the Imperial anymore.
[SPEAKER_01]: All of these require almost entire regiment of Imperial Army, or not even a full regiment just a few
[SPEAKER_01]: what made the 18th even more special though is that they were deployed in groups of like less than a dozen, not as warriors, but as commanders.
[SPEAKER_01]: Because the 18th is one of the few ones where we do get stories that as we talked about this during our, you know, space marine episode one time ago about how a star case are light years intelligent.
[SPEAKER_01]: They can process data, they are incredibly tactical.
[SPEAKER_01]: Much more so than even a very good guardsman general would be.
[SPEAKER_01]: The sound is would actually become the general of the fight, but there's a funny bit to that story, which I do like.
[SPEAKER_01]: When we covered the space walls, we talked about how remembersers didn't want to get placed with space walls because they'd have to run alongside a space wall while he ran head first in the fire, wearing power armor, and the remember answer was wearing a tunic.
[SPEAKER_01]: So it wasn't really an ideal moment.
[SPEAKER_00]: Also usually a colorful tunic and white so you could immediately be seen.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I'd also put this also talk about there's a couple of things we didn't jump into on that Which is the salamanders are were and still kind of are known to be the guys that as you're saying everybody wanted to be sacrificed They keep that mentality.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, so they keep getting into shit with multiple
[SPEAKER_00]: the high level commanders were like the salamanders were effectively just our doom chapter because they constantly run into yeah run into sacrificial things you know like did you really need to sacrifice yourselves that's what we did so if you're a member so you're like we're with
[SPEAKER_01]: It's really fun.
[SPEAKER_01]: The Imperial Army starts going, oh, I got the start here's with me.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's going to be crap at C-18.
[SPEAKER_01]: This next battle is going to, yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: And so in effect, if you the 18th were there, your day was going to be bad.
[SPEAKER_01]: One of them happening, though, is, after the events of the assault, to but Brad's point, though, is after the events of the assault and the tempest galleries, the 18th legions start doubling and tripling down on this like stoic suicidal attack of foes.
[SPEAKER_01]: not to be confused with the exact same way every other legion does us by the way, like, look, every sacrifice is their thing, dog.
[SPEAKER_00]: Come on.
[SPEAKER_00]: As opposed to sacrifices their thing, look it up, it's in the context.
[SPEAKER_01]: It is.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now, tell me the legion that doesn't sacrifice themselves for the great
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it's all I'm saying.
[SPEAKER_01]: I have for a long time and I'm going to die on this hill.
[SPEAKER_01]: We need to attend later.
[SPEAKER_01]: We go ahead 12 and lost two.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's fine.
[SPEAKER_01]: We didn't need 18.
[SPEAKER_01]: It gets repetitive and it drives me insane.
[SPEAKER_01]: We'll be right back after a quick break.
[SPEAKER_00]: I can't wait to talk about the stuff that happens when the Emperor meets Vulcan.
[SPEAKER_01]: So, after 50 years of great crusading, the 18th Legion are still struggling to get a solid footing.
[SPEAKER_01]: Their battle style, the combat attrition, it's a problem, and it is to Brad mentioned earlier the point where some of the Imperial High Command are wondering if the 18th Legion will survive.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, ominous.
[SPEAKER_01]: Ooh.
[SPEAKER_01]: It was a big thing to do.
[SPEAKER_00]: But there's like a big characters that are like, hey, man, wait, they talk about doing something.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was like, how do we make these guys stop jumping in front of every bullet?
[SPEAKER_01]: I know we also had this problem with Amper's children.
[SPEAKER_01]: The first legion don't forget we're almost destroyed because of the ragdain.
[SPEAKER_01]: This happens every freaking time.
[SPEAKER_01]: So obviously, if we're talking about a legion about to fall into oblivion, I wonder what's going to happen next.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh yeah, primarke.
[SPEAKER_01]: Anyway.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vulcan.
[SPEAKER_01]: All right.
[SPEAKER_01]: I really do stand by my statement.
[SPEAKER_01]: We had too many primarx.
[SPEAKER_01]: You step away from Vulcan.
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, look, let's call it a spade of spade.
[SPEAKER_01]: We, if we had only 12, the horse heresy is a five five thing.
[SPEAKER_01]: We don't lose much.
[SPEAKER_01]: We, and there are easy eight primarx to get rid of.
[SPEAKER_01]: Tell you what, let's, the next time we do our Q&A, which will be December 2025, I'll make sure, let's talk about which are the, was it eight primarx, we can get rid of, spoiler alert,
[SPEAKER_01]: Not my fault, GW doesn't care about him, not my fault.
[SPEAKER_01]: GW can be anything.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know what?
[SPEAKER_00]: We need Vulcan, screw this.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know why we need Vulcan?
[SPEAKER_00]: Vulcan wine.
[SPEAKER_00]: Tall, soup, tallest of the primarks.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's also epic.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's your first attack.
[SPEAKER_01]: Like how you care about that so much.
[SPEAKER_00]: 100%.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's all I want to be.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's so tall.
[SPEAKER_00]: Not just tall, tall, est.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's also glowing red eyes.
[SPEAKER_00]: It just bananas strong, man strong.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's, yeah, wildly strong.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, yeah, the Vulcan's cool.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vulcan's actually one of the ones that would keep.
[SPEAKER_01]: Jack and I is not ever.
[SPEAKER_01]: All right, let's talk about Vulcan.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vulcan, like every primar, can send to a random planet in the galaxy to face temptations of power and or corruption.
[SPEAKER_01]: And Vulcan gets more the sanguineous Gilmine treatment, where he's tempted with a leadership.
[SPEAKER_01]: The idea was to show him you're a better leader than the emperor.
[SPEAKER_01]: and therefore you would betray the emperor, seeing the flaws of the emperor.
[SPEAKER_01]: Then work on Vulcan, but it's a better method than what they did to the more terian, which is let's just make it or freaking conred, let's just make him crazy.
[SPEAKER_00]: Also, what terian's story, it was just like, hey man, does everything suck?
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, cool.
[SPEAKER_00]: Continue on, sucking.
[SPEAKER_01]: So Vulcan lands on the planet Nocturn, the ultimate segmentum, which is on the right side of the galaxy, Nocturn sits a little bit below the galactic core, and probably because of this location, it's a nightmare world.
[SPEAKER_01]: Nocturn has a few things.
[SPEAKER_01]: Going as I say, I feel just a few.
[SPEAKER_00]: Massive, tectonic disturbances.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, which we're going to have to cover on for you.
[SPEAKER_00]: So nocta, so the first issue with nocta, it's just volcanoes broke up all over the place.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, so here's the thing.
[SPEAKER_01]: There's a giant moon that's locked in a binary satellite orbit with nocta.
[SPEAKER_01]: And this causes, quote, massive disturbances on their forces, because GW says that this causes significantly
[SPEAKER_00]: there's so many things in this sci-fi fantasy magic thing that you know that you're cool with you're gonna put on your glasses with the tape in the middle you go on the fact that the moment we talk it protect the roots it has the moods force would not cause this yes because it wouldn't i'm sorry because i read it and i go uh that's pretty interesting yes
[SPEAKER_01]: and I have Google, so I go to Google.
[SPEAKER_01]: And yeah, the Moon can push a volcano over the edge if you have a really close, but it doesn't move tectonic plates.
[SPEAKER_01]: Tectonic movements, what causes volcanoes.
[SPEAKER_01]: So this is just wrong, and it annoys me when people put science into something and the science is wrong.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's what drives me nuts.
[SPEAKER_01]: It was the same issue I had with freaking Fenris, where it's like, how does anyone live on Fenris?
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, John, I hate to tell you this, but if you really don't like the science being wrong, you're going to really hate the internet.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's a fair point.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm sure there's some writing on the internet.
[SPEAKER_01]: No, it's exactly how the moon does.
[SPEAKER_01]: And also, there is no moon.
[SPEAKER_01]: There it is.
[SPEAKER_01]: Thanks, guys.
[SPEAKER_01]: Awesome.
[SPEAKER_01]: Aside from the volcanic activity,
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, they apparently just don't have an Ozone.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, well, which this one, by the way, actually is correct because the volcanic eruptions would erode it the same way that the chlorofluorocarbons did, but when we used to have aerosol cans, so there would be no ozone on this planet.
[SPEAKER_01]: So that part they were correct on.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think they were lucky with guessing, but they were correct.
[SPEAKER_01]: As a result, all the people of nocturnal skin is describes the obsidian black.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now, it's just awesome on the tabletop, by the way.
[SPEAKER_01]: It is, because it makes them really easy to paint.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's the flip side of that is...
[SPEAKER_01]: I will give GW some credit here.
[SPEAKER_01]: What this implies to me is that everything that's going on in nocturn is a function of the age of technology.
[SPEAKER_01]: The reason I say that is it took humanity hundreds of thousands of years to for our genes to add in basically skin tone, to adjust for solar radiation, that it took hundreds of thousands of years.
[SPEAKER_01]: These guys did it, and I don't know, 300.
[SPEAKER_00]: So man, radiation.
[SPEAKER_00]: I play Fallout, you get all kinds of stuff happening.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it's not, also, it's not how that works, but anyway, but what I'm thinking is that it is in Fallout, Fallout's also not correct, but you take that away, okay, but so what I think this is, because this is John Theory, but the reason I think this is we learned this with Leagues of Votin, when the Votin ancestors first got to the Galactic Core, they used genetic modification to actually adapt them to be able to survive there.
[SPEAKER_01]: So I think that's what you saw here.
[SPEAKER_01]: state is a function of kind of all of an experiment that was going on during the age of technology.
[SPEAKER_01]: I could see nocturn kind of falling into both of those, being, we call it fallout, like the way vault tech goes, all right, we're going to pick a couple planets and let's just do some weird crap there and see what happens to the people there and we do some other weird crap to.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's what I think nocturn was.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think nocturn is a, is basically vault, you know, 107.
[SPEAKER_01]: That wasn't a good fault.
[SPEAKER_01]: It was not a good fault.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a book.
[SPEAKER_01]: It was a pretty good one.
[SPEAKER_01]: Anyway, the other problem is that because it was settled in the early part of the dark age technology, not your barely survived this binary planet, all these issues.
[SPEAKER_01]: every 15 years, by the way, because of the binary thing, the two planets get close to each other, and these giant waves crash all over the planet, accurate.
[SPEAKER_01]: Thousands of volcanoes explode, earthquakes cover the land, not accurate, and then it's dinosaur time, because the entire sky gets blocked out with volcanic dust, all the plants die, winter sets in for, quote, a quarter of a year.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now, call this out again, that's what they wrote.
[SPEAKER_01]: These all the volcanoes explode, they fill the sky with ash, the sun is blocked out, and it lasts for four months.
[SPEAKER_01]: Brad lives in Ohio, I live in Michigan.
[SPEAKER_01]: I would love a three three month winter.
[SPEAKER_01]: That would be awesome.
[SPEAKER_01]: That would be a giant step up for both of us.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: No, the right three month winter.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, talk easy peasy.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_00]: Talk to me in February.
[SPEAKER_01]: Exactly.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, it's the third month of my winter was when I started wanting to kill myself.
[SPEAKER_00]: Also, it's snowed in Halloween.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, there's no one thanksgiving.
[SPEAKER_01]: It looks like too.
[SPEAKER_01]: But anyway, this time by the way, it's called the time of trial because sometimes gw just phones in a naming mechanic the people of to protect the people of nocturn and this is the cool thing with nocturn.
[SPEAKER_01]: There are seven sanctuary cities built around it and they're all independent kingdoms.
[SPEAKER_01]: But during the time of trial, they all open their gates to all the refugees, the outlying lands, because people basically go out and they farm these like 15 years in between.
[SPEAKER_01]: But when this comes in, they then run into the sanctuary cities for protection.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vulcan arrives on knockturn during one of the times of trial, which obviously is completely over by the time he turns to.
[SPEAKER_01]: So he, do you think he's been a bunch of time explaining this whole thing?
[SPEAKER_01]: And then it has no effect on Vulcan whatsoever, because he's gone before the next one anyway.
[SPEAKER_01]: Just saying it.
[SPEAKER_01]: So anyway.
[SPEAKER_01]: But there's a bigger problem with nocturn.
[SPEAKER_01]: The biggest problem with nocturn is Drew Carrey.
[SPEAKER_01]: And we talked about for the last episode about Drew Carrey, that Drew Carrey need to make raids in order into real space into the galaxy.
[SPEAKER_01]: And these raids, they murder people and capture slaves, take them back to the dark city.
[SPEAKER_01]: this though is occurring well before that because that doesn't rise up until m36.
[SPEAKER_01]: We're getting m30 right now.
[SPEAKER_01]: So these are the early ones.
[SPEAKER_00]: These are the ones where they're, it's like very, this is early.
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: So the jukari had at least one but likely numerous webweigh gates all on nocturn, and because this plant-sized salation of the rest of humanity and the dark-age of the technology became perfect prey for them, easily accessible, largely unarmed local populists, fun times.
[SPEAKER_01]: So for hundreds of years, by the way, Sloan Ashka, Sloan Ashka was born in M30s, and this is around 832 of M30,
[SPEAKER_01]: So we, but 800 years, 700 years, the Joukari had been raiding nocturn, almost like livestock style, whether they're letting them, we'll go grab a bunch of them, we'll let them repopulate, we'll go back through and do it again.
[SPEAKER_01]: And so what happens is the people there, whenever a Joukari raid happens, the bell rings and everyone just goes to their special shelter to hide, like the movie Purge, which I also haven't seen.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't think I'm missing out.
[SPEAKER_01]: Cool.
[SPEAKER_01]: All right.
[SPEAKER_01]: Anyway, back to welcome.
[SPEAKER_01]: So discover that birth and brought into one of these cities on knocker and Vulcan is another primar, which is labeled as a prophesied hero.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, oh, although it's pretty easy to prophesied somebody's going to be a hero with the baby is jacked and jagged.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, it's like.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're like, hey, man, I think that baby's going to be somebody, you're like, why?
[SPEAKER_00]: Because he's four times as big as a normal baby and he's currently doing pull-ups.
[SPEAKER_00]: I think he's going to do well.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, so he's discovered by a blacksmith named Nebel, who's part of the Promethium cult.
[SPEAKER_00]: What?
[SPEAKER_00]: This is a big deal.
[SPEAKER_00]: I know, which is just big.
[SPEAKER_01]: We're on, like, footnote 42 of, we're trying to tell this thing.
[SPEAKER_01]: Are we having more side stories?
[SPEAKER_00]: Come on.
[SPEAKER_00]: The community is called still is important in Salibia.
[SPEAKER_01]: It is Tuesday.
[SPEAKER_01]: But this cast is turning into Witcher 3.
[SPEAKER_01]: We're doing more side stuff than we are actual main story.
[SPEAKER_00]: So anyway.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, God.
[SPEAKER_00]: Witcher 3.
[SPEAKER_00]: I come out now.
[SPEAKER_00]: If you haven't played Witcher 3, what is wrong with your life?
[SPEAKER_00]: Also, too, if you're playing Witcher 3, and you haven't completely lost track of the main quest, because you've got somebody's side quest, you're playing your wrong also.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, yeah, first I beat Witcher 3.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm like, I don't know if I just won the game or not.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like, I don't even remember what I was supposed to do.
[SPEAKER_01]: So, anyway, the people of nocturn had developed their own like philosophy slash religion.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm liking it in the trouble here debating the difference between the two, because it's just some antics.
[SPEAKER_01]: By the way, but their philosophy was known as a Permitian cult.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now, there's two Permitian cults, by the way.
[SPEAKER_01]: There is the Permitian cult of this time, and there's a Permitian cult post-emper.
[SPEAKER_01]: So we're talking about the original, not the latter.
[SPEAKER_01]: But the Permitian cult was a set of beliefs, that center around nobility, self-reliance, altruism.
[SPEAKER_01]: Under the cult, you're supposed to be the best you can be striving toward perfection, but not personal.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, listen up, Emperor's children.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: But it's for the good of all and not for personal glory, which is fair.
[SPEAKER_01]: You're supposed to be fully self-reliant, but also always self-sacrificing.
[SPEAKER_01]: Anyway, this planet blows up every 15 years.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's the best way to explain it.
[SPEAKER_01]: Everyone's like, hey, everybody, the planet blows up.
[SPEAKER_01]: Be cool to your neighbors.
[SPEAKER_01]: As opposed to a fan risk, wherever time the planet blows up, they go murder all your neighbors.
[SPEAKER_00]: And just want you to know your chance.
[SPEAKER_00]: right now, John there are in separate places recording this because if we weren't, I definitely would have thrown something at him because he just summed all of the awesome this up in that.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, don't make things trivial, John.
[SPEAKER_01]: It is trivial.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're whole thing as we should be self-sacrifice.
[SPEAKER_01]: We should do all these things, but also we should be perfect, but also, but also, but also, yeah, no.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's just, this is Renaissance man BS that I hate.
[SPEAKER_01]: So anyway, for Vulcan though, there's one more key piece.
[SPEAKER_01]: They believe that a savior was gonna arrive at some point and a savior would drive the darkness away and uplift the people of nocturn.
[SPEAKER_01]: Like Sanguinius, Lorgar, Ferris Manus.
[SPEAKER_01]: Look, we don't need 18 primaries.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's all I'm saying.
[UNKNOWN]: All right.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vulcan's adoptive father Nebel saw and Vulcan the potential to be the savior for the teaching because as Brad said this is the biggest baby I've ever seen with bright red eyes.
[SPEAKER_01]: So, so he then endeavors to take this baby and this is with a baby guys like primarxyH quickly to teach him everything that he knows and so two years later Vulcan knows
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, could he did an 80s montage training video.
[SPEAKER_00]: He's also the best.
[SPEAKER_00]: The best.
[SPEAKER_00]: Vulcan is the best learning things.
[SPEAKER_01]: So by age three, Vulcan is the largest and smartest being on the planet, which also a little fun side note, how much did Primark's eat?
[SPEAKER_00]: Several.
[SPEAKER_00]: Because like, it's got to be a pretty big deal as I'm saying.
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's say because I have a child, I've also had dogs where you should take from puppy to full grown.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's impressive how much they eat.
[SPEAKER_01]: We're talking about some of these planets, like with sanguanias, they didn't have a lot of food.
[SPEAKER_00]: In order for him to grow this fast, you know, everybody is starving and you're eating 40,000 calories.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's something you look over there.
[SPEAKER_01]: And like, hey, what happened to the silo of grain of sanguanias ate it all?
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, he does keep us safe, I guess.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'll go a month without food.
[SPEAKER_01]: Good God.
[SPEAKER_01]: Here's how I know.
[SPEAKER_01]: So within a year, he takes over his father's forages.
[SPEAKER_01]: He starts crafting his own weapons and actually making up his own technology.
[SPEAKER_01]: By the way, the one thing that we talk with Vulcan's really cool is he will just, he's a great forgeman, but he also is technologically savvy as opposed to Fulgram Ferris Manus,
[SPEAKER_00]: Come on now, give him up, give him two sticks of gum, rubber band, he'll make this Magyver happen baby.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, yeah, he's more of a grouper, but anyway, um, it's so, oh god, I told you that the sort of rip worked, I, it's, oh god.
[SPEAKER_01]: All right, so when Vulcan's four years old, the Jucaria tacked the city, and by the way, four-year-old primark is full-grown primark for the
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's talk about how much of a bummer this is for this particular because we just did drew a car in real space, right?
[SPEAKER_00]: This one just, you just planned this out.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're like, these guys have never posed.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, these guys are up on it at all.
[SPEAKER_01]: Watch this, yeah.
[SPEAKER_00]: Dude, we don't even need a pay attention.
[SPEAKER_00]: We barely, it's not even, this is auto pilot, baby.
[SPEAKER_01]: So the dripari rate happens.
[SPEAKER_01]: Everyone runs in hide.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vulcan grabs two hammers, throws on the boots of my de-ass, kicking throws a little extra pops into the top of them.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: get some nice tight and walks into the town square.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now, the cool thing about the people of nocturn is he walks in the town square.
[SPEAKER_01]: Him just doing that, people start coming out of hiding to join him.
[SPEAKER_01]: So it's not like he does this whole fight by himself.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now, he inspires everybody.
[SPEAKER_00]: And this is really cool because he just tells people, you can fight back.
[SPEAKER_00]: I love this.
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like an anti bully thing.
[SPEAKER_01]: Exactly.
[SPEAKER_01]: And so they do this whole thing.
[SPEAKER_01]: Now again, as usual, a fight breaks out and the primarck and the people are doing stuff.
[SPEAKER_01]: So the primarck against Drew Carrey, who they're not slower at this stage.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're just as fast as current Drew Carrey.
[SPEAKER_01]: So I think we know who did most of the fighting.
[SPEAKER_01]: But the people were present, Luther, looking at you, Luther, but anyway, after killing over a hundred Drew Carrey himself, I think it may have even
[SPEAKER_01]: The jukari retreat, and Vulcan is standing victorious in the middle of the city.
[SPEAKER_01]: Word spreads to all of nocturn, and all of the settlements reach out to Hesoid, which is where he's based, and they send emissaries to greet Vulcan.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vulcan teaches them how to forge weapons, that they can use against the jukari, tactics, strategies, and I had to look this next bit up three times, because it makes no sense.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, this is kind of dumb.
[SPEAKER_00]: It makes me angry on this one because what should happen is everyone immediately goes home and puts 47 harpoons and fortifies everything.
[SPEAKER_00]: Every single place is ready to defend themselves instantly.
[SPEAKER_01]: No, it said they just declare victory and have a party.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're like, cool, Vulcan showed us how to beat the jukari.
[SPEAKER_01]: We're not going to test any of this.
[SPEAKER_01]: We're just going to go.
[SPEAKER_01]: He was right.
[SPEAKER_01]: Go team awesome.
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's have a big party.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's it.
[SPEAKER_01]: And because they say, we're going to always, they all got to say, we're going to stand up the Drew car next time they show up and Vulcan went, yeah, give us a big thumbs up and then they have.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, but now they then have a giant tournament of strength and crafting, which unfortunately was not crochet, it would have been a lot funnier if that was one of the ones.
[SPEAKER_01]: They Vulcan just didn't get a sweater.
[SPEAKER_00]: That's right.
[SPEAKER_00]: He would have definitely done it after him.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, yeah, oh, it would have been a really good sweater.
[SPEAKER_01]: But on the eve of the great tournament, I loan wanderer enters Hessweide, described as being pale, which is compared to everyone there who has obsidian skin, and wearing silly clothes.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's why he's described that.
[SPEAKER_01]: He asked to enter the class.
[SPEAKER_00]: By the way, what I first read this, I couldn't help myself because they do actually say silly clothes.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, I just imagined the upper, just wearing like a clown outfit.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, I went the other way.
[SPEAKER_01]: Shuggling.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm thinking of it.
[SPEAKER_01]: He's dressed like you were in the 80s.
[SPEAKER_01]: He's wearing hammer pants.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, hammer pants.
[SPEAKER_01]: He's got a, like, 11.
[SPEAKER_01]: Cardigan with no shirt on.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, cardigan is numerous colors all through the cardigan.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's hot.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's really well bent.
[SPEAKER_01]: Because there were weeks that now it's all flat rim.
[SPEAKER_01]: Used to bend the hats.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, and it's backwards.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: Maybe he's got some.
[SPEAKER_00]: What were the, oh, he has a moment for sure.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, he's got Oakley's on.
[SPEAKER_01]: You're doing Oaklees.
[SPEAKER_01]: I wasn't going to Oaklees.
[SPEAKER_01]: I was going to go the what were the ones the quarterback for the bears used to wear.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, you're, you're where the sheriff glasses.
[SPEAKER_01]: Another shepherd, the ones with the chains in them.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: You had a pair of those.
[SPEAKER_00]: I know you're talking about make man's blasts.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, that make man glasses.
[SPEAKER_01]: You're sorry.
[SPEAKER_01]: Just, yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: We're doing a good look.
[SPEAKER_01]: So anyway, he comes in.
[SPEAKER_01]: He's wearing silly clothes and the people laugh at this stranger because he says, I'm going to challenge Vulcan.
[SPEAKER_01]: This whole thing's really weird story because everyone's saying to him, the emperor, let's follow it's emperor.
[SPEAKER_01]: But it comes in and says, I wish to challenge Vulcan.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm going to say, oh, you silly goose, you could never know and we'll ever beat Vulcan.
[SPEAKER_01]: But then there's a hundred other people who are also competing with Vulcan.
[SPEAKER_01]: So it's anyway, the reason it's silly anyone else is there is that this is an effect of strong man competition where it's Eddie Hall and like me.
[SPEAKER_01]: I am strong.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm big, you know, I'm almost, I'm over two, I'm over two meters tall.
[SPEAKER_00]: You're not Eddie Hall's strong.
[SPEAKER_01]: But yeah, Eddie Hall, oh my, I didn't hope would juggle the dumbbells I lift with.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's what we're talking about, difference.
[SPEAKER_01]: So apparently, other people were looking at Vulkan, who's the biggest primar and going, I think I can outlift him.
[SPEAKER_01]: which is basically the story of how Brad's back hurts.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm going to beat him.
[SPEAKER_00]: I would have won this contest versus Vulcan.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, how many times did a person minding their own business lift more weights than you?
[SPEAKER_01]: And you decided, while minding your own business.
[SPEAKER_00]: I was about to say, not while I was around.
[SPEAKER_01]: mine in their own business, lifting heavier weights than Brad and Brad goes, I don't need a lower back.
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, they did lift heavier weights than me for a while.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, sure I couldn't do anything after.
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, screw this up.
[SPEAKER_00]: I need to tell that because I told John recently I went to the gym and I was already not doing well.
[SPEAKER_00]: And
[SPEAKER_00]: I said, hey man, I'm really hurt because somebody was lifting great, and I got ego lift, and I had to lift more, and then I hurt myself, and then I had to ride my bike home from the gym while it poured down rain, and the initial response from Chad was, you deserved everything that's been.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, you have some very tragic issues with your body.
[SPEAKER_01]: Those are not your fault.
[SPEAKER_01]: This one?
[SPEAKER_01]: You have a bunch of them, though, that are 100% your fault.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's not so silly.
[SPEAKER_01]: On adulterated, yeah, Brad did that to Brad.
[SPEAKER_00]: Writing a place to go home in the pouring rain.
[SPEAKER_00]: This is my backwards song.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I have a bunch of them too.
[SPEAKER_01]: I have a bunch of weird scars and that kind of stuff.
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, what happened there?
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm not spunked.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's an happened there.
[SPEAKER_01]: Poor people.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's a cool control.
[SPEAKER_00]: But let's go back to the effort.
[SPEAKER_00]: But let's do one thing when, remember, the Emperor appears as either whatever people want him to see, but effectively he appears as whatever he wants them to see.
[SPEAKER_00]: So he shows up and he's just a guy to them right now.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
[SPEAKER_01]: A guy in weird clothes.
[SPEAKER_01]: But he's not showing up as the legend into, I apologize Salamander fence.
[SPEAKER_01]: I know I am dumping all over their lower.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's about to get worse.
[SPEAKER_01]: All right.
[SPEAKER_01]: So they have a contest and some of them are just dumb.
[SPEAKER_01]: Like at one, they're holding two animals over their heads.
[SPEAKER_00]: Anyway, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, because they declare Vulcan goes with the emperor.
[SPEAKER_00]: They declare that whoever wins this con loses the contest has to declare field to you.
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, yeah, that was a big deal.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, the emperor's a dick.
[SPEAKER_01]: I was screwed with that part of it.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, you have to declare field to the emperor anyway.
[SPEAKER_01]: I do like that they have this whole competition.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's staged over eight days and the only one that the GW bothered writing was holding animals over their head.
[SPEAKER_01]: Was there a tug of war?
[SPEAKER_01]: Did they do Atlas stones?
[SPEAKER_01]: Bodybuilding.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're hard to have been.
[SPEAKER_01]: They had a great stop at the moment.
[SPEAKER_00]: For me, there's at least an entire day of flip-cup.
[SPEAKER_01]: Flip-cup.
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, it's not a thing.
[SPEAKER_01]: They would, they'd cornhole, slipknot, they'd just cornhole, the adbor and Vulcan playing cornhole, but it's a mile apart, eventually it's a tie.
[SPEAKER_01]: There has to be a tie breaker.
[SPEAKER_01]: So the two contestants are sent off on a hunt, and they're given 24 hours to forge their own weapon, and then go hunt down, and I'm quoting here, one of the reptilian salamanders,
[SPEAKER_01]: Sorry, I have a child and I like going to zoos.
[SPEAKER_01]: Salamanders are not reptiles.
[SPEAKER_01]: Salamanders are amphibians.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're like frogs and toads.
[SPEAKER_01]: They breathe through their skin, they're born as tadpoles.
[SPEAKER_01]: I have no idea what the GW was doing here with this right.
[SPEAKER_01]: It makes, they have zoos all over the UK.
[SPEAKER_01]: Really, really good ones.
[SPEAKER_01]: Call them a drink.
[SPEAKER_01]: find the context, but like they go to Mount Deathfire to go hunt down these salamanders to find the largest Drake there, which in England, fire, Drake.
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you much.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it's a term for dragon, but also male duck.
[SPEAKER_01]: Just so you know, when you see it, the ducks, ducks, ducks, ducks, ducks.
[SPEAKER_00]: If it's a large enough to ride, it is fearsome.
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you very much.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I mean, duck, no, goose, like, you know, I don't know what Canadian goose, these things are monstrous.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, we don't mess, you don't mess with geese.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's the old thing.
[SPEAKER_01]: It's every time the goose hisses at you, you're like, look, I know I'll win this fight, but I don't want to, if it bites me in the face, that's been the rest of my life with a scar in my face and explain what happened.
[SPEAKER_01]: I got bit by a swan like that kind of sucks back to the actual writing up on Mount Deathfire Vulcan finds the largest fire drink he's ever seen and smashed it in the head of the hammer killing it and then he grabs it and starts walking home but oh no what could go wrong the volcano erupts while he's on it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh no, hold on back up though if you're going to be
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I'm out.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's why we're both, you know, suddenly shook and fell and with one hand, he held onto the edge of the cliff because below him was lava and with the other hand, he held his Drake and he couldn't pull himself up and so he hung out there for six hours.
[SPEAKER_01]: Just as I hate this part of course you for sure.
[SPEAKER_00]: He just take he literally would just chuck the lizard up and do a pull-up He'd do a set of pull-ups.
[SPEAKER_00]: Nope.
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, move on.
[SPEAKER_01]: Nope.
[SPEAKER_01]: The strongest largest primar couldn't do that
[SPEAKER_01]: Anyway, story gets worse, so while hanging there after six hours as his grip is beginning to fail, again, primer, the mysterious stranger arrives and but the mysterious stranger is on the other side, and it sees Vulcan about to fall and does, I'm just going to tell you what he does, guys, deal with this story.
[SPEAKER_01]: The, by the way, the emperor is holding a larger Drake than the
[SPEAKER_00]: Like a real gentleman, he throws his salamander over the lava so that Vulcan can cross the street.
[SPEAKER_01]: No, you got that wrong.
[SPEAKER_01]: He throws it.
[SPEAKER_01]: He then jumps on the lava and jumps up to pull Vulcan up.
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, yes, but I'm just saying it's better when I say the gentleman.
[SPEAKER_01]: He throws his Drake into the lava and then jumps on it and then jumps off it.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes you got a double job.
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes you got to kill Yoshi to get to the other side with double job John.
[SPEAKER_01]: God.
[SPEAKER_01]: Anyway, I mean, I will say it actually made me laugh because it made me think of a cursive monkey island.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's what you would do across lava to throw something and then jump on it.
[SPEAKER_01]: But I digress.
[SPEAKER_01]: All right, they get back to Hessweid and Vulcan is declared the victor because he has a salamander and the stranger didn't.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vulcan and is a noble person says no, he lost and he kneels in front of the stranger declaring him the victor and because it is mine, anyone who valued life over pride was worthy of his fealty, which I almost choked on the irony of that statement being said to the Emperor.
[SPEAKER_01]: Thank you.
[SPEAKER_01]: No.
[SPEAKER_01]: And at this moment, of course, the Emperor reveals his true self, which is a pale person dressed very funny, but also the Emperor.
[SPEAKER_01]: So we'll have that.
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm always torn with the Emperor doing these things, because I always convinced that he's like Thor and Ragnarok, where he actually looks like the Emperor the whole time, but has a little veil in front of this face.
[SPEAKER_01]: But the next thing the Emperor does is, of course, shitty.
[SPEAKER_01]: The Emperor tells Vulcan he's gonna come with him as an adjoinous forces that conquer the Scott Stars.
[SPEAKER_01]: In Vulcan said, yeah, I'd love to go, but I can't leave Nocturn, my people undefended.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're my people, and they rely on me.
[SPEAKER_01]: And the Emperor said, yeah, of course, I'll gather some of the force here and they'll keep the people alive, don't worry about it.
[SPEAKER_01]: just kidding, he didn't do that at all.
[SPEAKER_01]: The Emperor looks at him and says, well, his duty is not to one world, but all of them.
[SPEAKER_01]: Why protect a single world when through duty, the Emperor can protect thousands?
[SPEAKER_01]: And Vulcan goes, oh, okay, fair point, and just ditches nocturn?
[SPEAKER_01]: That's what he does.
[SPEAKER_01]: And he joins his legion.
[SPEAKER_01]: That's the story.
[SPEAKER_01]: Sorry, sucks.
[SPEAKER_01]: Sorry.
[SPEAKER_01]: Vulcan's lost.
[SPEAKER_01]: But Emperor and Lehman Russ, cool story.
[SPEAKER_01]: Emperor and Gilliman, cool story, Emperor and Doran, cool story.
[SPEAKER_01]: This one I don't like, just being that's fine.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think Vulcan's cool.
[SPEAKER_01]: I think Vulcan's great.
[SPEAKER_01]: I just think the Emperor's story is like the mysterious stranger has arrived.
[SPEAKER_01]: They're going to do a contest of strength that we're not going to actually add a lot of detail to, whatever.
[SPEAKER_01]: All right.
[UNKNOWN]: But
[SPEAKER_01]: Actually, that's a good break point though, because the next week we're going to get into the Salamanders as they go into Horace Heresy all die and say Horace Heresy and some of the Vulcan actions post.
[SPEAKER_01]: I hope you all like it.
[SPEAKER_01]: And then next week we'll dive more into Salamanders or as I like to call them, then not quite ultra marines of this, it's Facebook religions.
[SPEAKER_01]: LAME!
[SPEAKER_01]: So until next week, John Barzati, Brad Jester.
[SPEAKER_01]: The scoundrel.